New Problems Chapter Eight: Slight Filler and Character Development

Disclaimer: Cat is mine. Nobody else is. Understood? Excellent. My work here is done.

Shout-outs:
boogalaga: .:hides:. Ahhhh! I am very much indeed scared by your scariness. I obey your demands to update! And next time go after my muses; they're really the ones to blame. No, not me at all...

Umbra the Dark: Yes, very definitely! Thanks for your review!

LalaithCat: Ah. InterNutter is getting to you. But she hasn't updated! You'll have to draw pictures of Sarah and Mort to make up for it. Just to be mean, I have a special message just for you: Don't think of pictures of Sarah/Mort/Logan/Scott cheerleading. Or dancing, but to that mental imgage you can(orcan't. Remember, this is what you are notsupposed to visualize)add various Star Wars characters...

theshadowcat: They are very naughty muses. But they have been cooperating for this chapter! It's been only... One week! To the day.

lioness78: Thank you for your review! I put in the little ficlet I wrote from your inspiration at the end of the chapter. I just couldn't resist.

epalladino: Thank you as well! And look, I'm updating before a month has passed!

Believe it or not, actual fic is featured below! And, at the end of the chapter, a random special bonus.

Later, the evening of the same day of the previous chapter:

Knock knock

"What're you two doing in there?" growled Hellboy.

"Girly things. Go away." Responded Liz. She was holed up in her room with Cat on the basis that they needed some time to be, well, girly. So they had decided to spend the evening in Liz's room, watching The Princess Bride, eating chocolate and talking.

Heavy footsteps announced Hellboy walking away down the hall. The two girls turned back to each other. "Well," said Cat "What were you saying again?"

"Oh, nothing much, just that we should do this every so often. I think Abe and HB need a reminder that we're girls every so often."

"Good point."

"Yup. Plus I like spending time with another female… (1)"

"Me too. Haven't had much time to, previously."

"I understand. I accidentally burned down my neighborhood when I was younger… destroyed it entirely."

Cat winced in response. "Uncontained plant growth. I was near someone trimming a hedge—heavily, mind, just hacking at it; normal pruning doesn't hurt—and I started to feel it, like I was the one he was cutting, and I guess everything just exploded into bloom as a response, covering everyone in the area with green things… My fangs had showed themselves, along with everything else, and I ran down the street, people staring at me like I was a monster, and seeds and whisps of weeds growing into a green carpet on the sidewalk behind me… I hid in a local park for a while, and they put the plant growth down to wonky fertilizer and increased rainfall."

"How old were you?"

"Let's see… I would have been nine, then."

"That early?"

"Don't ask me. I know just as much as you do."

"Or just as little," said Liz dryly.

That startled a laugh out of her and she settled down to watch her favorite part. "My name is Inigo Montoya," she muttered along with the movie. "You killed my father. Prepare to die."

"Like it, huh?" Liz said dryly.

"It's a great line! How could you not like it?"

"Good question. What do you think of your new features, now you've had a little while to get used to them?"

"A little while? Liz, it's been all of half a day."

"Really? It seems longer than that."

"Not to me. I'm still jumping every time I see myself in a mirror… I guess I wasn't any great beauty to start with, so now I'm not even vaguely human I'm hardly losing in that department. And I'm getting better at talking without impaling my tongue on my fangs. The worst part is my eyes."

"Really? Why?"

"Everything looks… sharper. And my depth perception's gone odd. Things just… don't look right."

"You know, I don't think you're ugly like that. Yeah, you don't look like you used to, but it's nice. In a different sort of way, yes, but similarity isn't everything."

"Liz, I look like I had a mad tattoo artist set loose on me."

"You act like that's a bad thing."

"And then there's the cat eyes,"

"They're a pretty shade of green."

"And the fangs…"

"Okay, they're a bit off-putting, but you can hardly notice them unless you know they're there."

"Liz, the only people I see know me and the fact that I have fangs."

"Why are you unable to take a compliment?"

"Why are you insisting on giving me false compliments?"

"I am not."

"Are too!"

"Are not!"

"Are… oh god. Did I seriously start doing that?"

"Yes."

"You have such a bad effect on me!"

"Admit it, then… stripes, plant-filled hair and the eyes are attractive."

"I have only your opinion on that."

"Hellboy thinks so too."

There was a brief pause. "How do you know?" asked Cat tentatively.

Liz sighed. "I've lived around him ever since I was brought in by the BPRD. I know him pretty well at this point. And he's hardly one to object if you don't meet the normal standards for beauty."

Cat blushed slightly, in green. "I thought you were in love with him," she said.

"No. We're old friends, but we're not in love. I mean, we love each other, but more in a brother-sister sort of way, not the way I think he loves you… Oh damn, now I'm all confused."

"Not half as confused as I am."

(1) If Liz seems totally OoC, this is because I figure all girls need time to be girly; this manifests from time to time. I am not, by any stretch of the imagination, like this all the time. I do, however, do this on occasion. And everyone should watch The Princess Bride, right after they read the book, which is better.

A/N: This is a little ficlet that was inspired by a question asked by my reviewer, Lioness78: What would happen if Cat started sprouting little ones, like a real plant? Well, this is my view of it… I have decided to post it at the end of this chapter just for amusements sake.

HB: What just ran by?

Liz: I don't know, what did just run by?

HB: It looked like little greenish babies.

Liz: looks at HB oddly

HB: What? It did!

Abe: (walks in) You know, I swear I just saw little green children running by me...

Liz: It's catching.

Cat: (runs by) Get back here, menaces! What have I told you about eating my soil supplements?

Liz: Cat, what do you know about the rash of small green children seen recently?

Cat: Uh, nothing? Maybe it's leperchauns... yeah, leperchauns. It's around St. Patrick's Day...

Abe: If that was true, we'd have bunnies with eggs instead of small green things.

Cat: (stalls for time) Well, what if I told you something very interesting has been happening to me recently...?

Liz: Okay, what have you done now?

Cat: It's not my fault I started growing vegetative children one day!

Abe: Oh God…

HB: Oh damn…