" My hands are tied

My body bruised, she's got me with

Nothing to win and

Nothing left to lose"-- With or without you by U2

Why is it my karmic destiny to be a prisoner? Wherever I go, it follows me like a shadow. The planet's trashed, villages burned to the ground, what little was left anyway. And there stands, a newly formed mining field. Where slaves from other planets and the few Edorians reside, working for the right to live. Isn't that the pits.

"Major Carter." You. I've got a bone to pick with you.

"Your oh so loyal Jaffa killed my cat." You're now on my list. Right at the top. Please wipe that smug grin from your face, it's disturbing to watch. "Surprised to find me here?"

"Surprised to find you? No." Huh. Don't give yourself too much credit, there is no way you would have known I'd be here. "Surprised by your condition? Yes, very much in fact."

I'm always last to find out nowadays. "Okay then, how did you know I was here."

He chucked, getting up from his tackily decorated chair. Motioning his Jaffa to leave, he came to stand by me, holding my hand. "I had a nice chat with Sg-1." That's great, I'm happy for you. Now drop my hand, we're not on a date here. "I was disappointed to see you weren't there with them. It seems you were replaced."

Yeah, so, therefore... get to the point. Why do all Goa'ulds speak as if they have some big finale, or an audience or something. "It seems."

"Yes, well before they were able to escape they gave up the address of a world rich with naquadah."

I know Jack was a little more than mad at me, but he would never give me up to Ba'al. Much less the innocent people of Edora. He wouldn't. It goes everything against who he is. "Sg-1 revealed this to you?" How many times did you have to kill them to get this little piece of information?

"Along with information that you were living amongst with the Edorians." Dun Dun Dunnn, the grand finale, the big dropping shoe. Applauding audience.

Don't get upset, he's lying. "Did they." Raise an eyebrow, look incredulous.

"I was quiet unimpressed actually." Pause. Dramatic effect. "This Lieutenant Tobias was very forthcoming with information regarding you. Yet I had not tortured her for it." OK, the other shoe dropped. In fact, the whole dammed planet was raining with the other shoe. "Nor did I ask."

What. The. Hell.

Tobias huh. Ms-you-took-my-job-so-I'm-going-to-join-in-on-the-rebel-SGC-Clair-Tobias. Yeah, I remember her. And since Barrett has been releasing all the officers involved, it shouldn't come to a surprise that she'd be the one to replace me. I mean, we were both pretty qualified. So, this women volunteered my location. To Ba'al. Was she nuts, it's fucking Ba'al. What was she thinking. Did the rest of my... ahem. Her, the rest of her team know about this.

"So, Sg-1 escaped from your grasp once again. It's old news." Changing the subject is popular within planets, species, galaxies. But, maybe I shouldn't make him angry. Since I can't even run.

"Not all. I have you." You have me? Can I have someone too? Since were possessing human beings are back in fashion now.

Sigh, so what now. Do you have a pit? Or do you prefer cells. Are we going to start with torture, or just mind numbing questions. You pick.

"My intent isn't at hurting you." Blink. It's not? "I'm quiet taken with you." He's touching my face. What do I do? Do I move away, kick him in the nuts, spit? Do I endanger my unborn child? Or do I save us both and play in this sick fantasy... "I'd like you to be my mistress."

Oh boy.

"If you haven't noticed, I'm pregnant. There isn't a point in making me a host. It'll need to go into hibernation." Yeah, take that.

He looks smug. I bet, it's because he's about tell me something that I didn't know, therefore my previous remake would be moot. "I do not have Goa'uld mates. We are an ambitious race, I cannot risk in my position from by taking a mate."

Um, okay. So what do I do, file your nails and fill your goblet with wine?

"I wont ask much of you Samantha," Oh really, thats new. "just your companionship."

"For how long?"

"Until I see fit." That long huh. "If not, then I cannot guarantee your safety. nor your child's." Was that a threat? Probably.

Sigh. Deep breath. Breathe in, and out. Repeat. "I accept."

"I am pleased."

Yeah...


Minus the fact that I now live with hundreds of Jaffa, a dozen servants, one goa'uld, and this gigantic trained tiger, things are not that bad. After being in deep depression for the first couple of months, Ba'al had thought that the loss of my dear cat had been the reasoning behind it and had shipped a tiger as a gift. A trained tiger. Imagine, a tiger acting like a household cat. Ba'al wasn't very smart when it came to human emotions. No, he wasn't. Kind of egotistical if you think about it. No, it couldn't possibly be the fact that I'm cut off from my world, my freedom, and forced to live with a goa'uld with a child on the way. No,it was the cat.

I've tried everything to save the rest of the Edorian people, when I first started to feel safe in my new situation, I tried very hard to get Ba'al to let them go. To send them to Cimmera, the only safe address I could divulge without direct consequences.

It didn't work.

He was rather getting irritated with the fact I wouldn't let go of the subject. Made a remark of my survival in my current state if he were to get another mistress. I never mentioned it again.

I'm sorry about it, but I don't regret it.

I'm not exactly sure when I'm due, but I feel that it's getting pretty close. I'm as big as I'll ever be, and I have slight cramps. Not nearly as bad as going into labor, just enough to hint that it is on it's way. I fear that there might be something wrong, it's always stressed to women of prenatal care, and I didn't have any. I keep telling my self that women all over the world have been giving birth for years and years before modern medicine. Besides Nalia seems to know what she's doing. She's my care giver. I refuse to call her slave.

"Samantha, how are you doing this evening?" Hey, it was Ba'al. We've been working on our friendship, I'd hate to say it, but it's going somewhere. I mean, you could never have a friendship with a goa'uld, but he has gained my trust and right now, that is very important to me. "Nalia has informed me of your pains. Is the time near?"

"Im not sure, this kid seems to want out, but my water hasn't-" Oh, crap.

My water broke.

I should have been ready for childbirth since I knew of the baby. But no, I'm not prepared. And I'm scared shitless. Ba'al rushed to my side while ordering for the jaffa to fetch Nalia. "Do not fear, Nalia is very talented at childbirth."

"That," Breath in. "is," Breath out. "good." Breath in. "to," Scream. "hear."

I don't think Ba'al has ever witnessed childbirth before, or at least be the man beside the woman. Because for a goa'uld, he is wearing a pained expression and is currently trying to pry my hand from his. Men. All the same no matter the moral differences. Innocent or evil, put a pregnant woman beside him and they're all suddenly on the same page.

"Jaffa! Where is Nalia!"

Yes, where was she, I need her. Really bad. Plus, someone HAS to see Ba'al's face. It's priceless.

Squeel! It's Nalia. She came to save me. I've never taken a lamaze class but I still know the breathing technique, I'm not doing it right. Isn't it supposed to make the pain go away? What was the point the, I thought it was to make the pain go away! My brain is doing the tango in by head, and the baby wants to make an entrance to the world, now. It wants out now.

"AAHHHH!!!" Is it out? Tell me it's out. You know kid, I'm not very fond of you at the moment.

"Samantha, push as hard as you can." Nalia? When did you get between my legs? Giggles. I'm not thinking straight.

If the goa'uld are so damn superior to humans in technology, why don't they have demerol?!

Someone moaned. It wasn't me. I gave that up and picked up the ear splitting screams. Scream. See, that was me. "Good Samantha, you're all done now, you can relax." Done? Me? I have a baby? I'm done? Double yay.

"Samantha, your grip is impressive." What? Oh, crap. Don't laugh, he'll get mad.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't realize."

I broke his hand.

"It's a girl."

Oh, a girl. Nalia put her in my arms and I thought I was going to melt. She is beautiful. Brown eyes. She's definitely Jack's baby. "She's beautiful Samantha." Ba'al, sorry I zoned you out. Didn't even know you were here. "What will you name her?"

"Her name is Grace. She's my Grace."