Sorry it's been so long since, I've started school again and it's zapping me of energy and time. Because this is a wip, this chapter might not flow in sequence as the last chapter. And plus, this particular chapter has more emotional stuff then the others, and sarcasm could go so far.
I'm totally, absolutely in love. All I have felt this year was emotional pain, betrayal, and abandonment. And now, I'm so warm with love, I'll never go cold again. I now have somebody that I love with all my heart, and somebody that loves me. I now feel at home. Home is definitely where the heart is. No, I'm not talking about Ba'al. What are you thinking?
Grace had her first smile today. And it was beautiful.
Ba'al had gotten a hand made stuffed... something. It sort of looked like a bear, with a fin? Like a seal with a face of a bear. It's kind of cute. I wasn't pleased that Grace's security blanket was going to be a toy from Ba'al, but she loves it. And Ba'al has been nothing but generous to me. It would be morally wrong for me to be ungrateful for what he has done for me. Don't get me wrong, he still is an evil goa'uld who has killed, enslaved, and tortured for years. Including the torture of Jack O'Neill.
Am I siding with the enemy? I obviously didn't have a choice. Or did I? Ba'al gave me a choice, basically, die, or live in his company and get the chance to have Grace.
No, I made the right choice.
Grace cooed, shining me her adorable smile.
This was the only choice, if anything, in the past year, this was one of the best choices I've made.
"Samantha." Startled, I gasped. Turning away from the window to face the man I've been thinking non stop about. "I apologize, I've frighten you."
"No need to apologize, I was just startled." Adjusting Grace firmly in my arms, I got up from the chair, walking towards the little bed made for her. "She loves the toy, thank you. She gets upset when she's without it."
Ba'al had gestured to hold her, reluctantly, I hand her over. He won't hurt her. He will not hurt her. I have this theory, if you repeat what you hope, it'll come true. It hasn't worked for me. But one can hope. "She is absolutely beautiful Samantha. You should know, that I adore her as my own." Do you know what it looks like when the muscles in your face completely loosens? Well, take a look at mine. Ahem. "You do?"
Is this the end of the line? No more going back home, no gymnastics lessons for little Grace, no PTA meetings, no Earth? Do I live out my life, as well as Grace's in the company of a Goa'uld? Who might care for me, as well as Grace... Am I giving up on Earth?
"Yes, I cannot stress enough that you should not fear me. I will not hurt you or Grace." He smiled, laughing out loud as Grace captured his finger in her hand. Babbling and swinging her little arms about. They looked like father and daughter. And it disturbed me greatly. Damn you Jack O'Neill. Why, why couldn't my life just be normal? "We're leaving, back to my home world. And I intend on taking you two with me. I know ordering around isn't the way your accustomed to," Boy, you have no idea of being a subordinate in the military do you. "So, I am going to ask you." This is not Stockholm's syndrome. No, this was Ba'al actually caring about how I feel. "Will you and Grace accompany me back to my home?"
There was silence. I panicked for a second, not because of his question. But the silence. Grace was babbling a second ago.
I rush to his side, scared that I let my guard down and paid for it with my only daughter.
Sleeping. She fell asleep.
In Ba'al's arms. My daughter fell asleep in the arms of a goa'uld. Could I let her grow up in such a violent environment?
Again, do I have any other choice.
I sighed. There is definately no turning back from here. "We'll go." I watched him put Grace to bed, kissing her forehead gingerly. "Thank you for asking me."
"We leave before the sun sets tomorrow." He walked over to me, caressing my face in a loving manor. "There will be no need for you to pack. You'll have everything you'll need in my home. Your home." You're stretching it a bit there buddy, let's not jump in bed and get matching patterns on the china just yet. My mind was racing, thinking of too many things at once. Giving me a headache. If I asked of him, would he allow us to go? I'm almost certain that he wouldn't harm us. But let us leave? That is a different situation. The doors bursted open, interrupting my train of thought, Ba'al's as well. "What is the meaning of this!" His eyes glowed. I hate it when he does that. Dead give away that I live with a goa'uld.
The Jaffa got on his knees, bowing his head. "My lord, the Tau'ri have infiltrated this world."
Ba'al turned to me accusingly. "I swear, I don't know about this. Besides, if what you say about them giving up Edora is true, you should have expect them to clean up their mess." Surprisingly, he didn't hit me. Nor seemed angry.
"Ready the ship, we'll be leaving this world."
Now is the chance, ask him. Demand that he let you stay. Or, run away.
"Ba'al, I'd like to stay. Let Grace and I stay, please." Gunfire. "I won't tell them anything, you don't have anything to lose." More gunfire. Very close now. I can almost smell it. The thing that hurt is, I'd say what I always believed in, that 'my friends will come for me, they'll find me.' But I'm not sure anymore. "Please, let me give Grace a chance to get away from war, and violence. Help me keep her innocence."
He was thinking. He was actually considering what I've said. More gunfire, they're here. They're a couple of rooms away. He's going to get caught. Ba'al was going to get caught. Why wasn't he running? "Samantha,"
Gunfire.
Ba'al was interrupted by Sg-1 rushing in. Weapons raised. Their face painted, and guns pointed at Ba'al. He was interrupted.
"Don't move!" Hi Jack, how are ya? Now, we were in the middle of a conversation. Don't be rude.
"Samantha, I was going to say, yes." His eyes looked kind. Human.
Jack stepped forward a few steps. "Hey! Shut up, and arms up where I can see them."
"Before I go, I'd like to tell you that I loved both you and Grace." Ba'al turned to Sg-1, pointing to them. "But, I was not lying. They gave you up Samantha."
"Shut the hell up Ba'al!"
"Colonel O'Neill, when were safe and cozy in the hole in your world, I took Samantha in. I kept her alive and happy as well as I could. I witnessed the beautiful glow from her child bearing, held her hand while she gave birth. And have been a good father to her child." He looked over to me, as for assurance. I nodded, I can't deny that he was a good father figure. "I gave her happiness while you gave her up. You gave her to me. Tell me, were you trying to rid her from yourself? She never spoke about it."
"Don't say another word, or I blow your head off!"
"Samantha, I promise you, I did not lie to you while you were here. Your team led me here, informed me you were here. They led me to you."
Jack pulled his trigger, the bullet bouncing off Ba'al's body shield.
I must have looked like a lost dog, or something equally as sad and pathetic looking. I couldn't stop the tears from falling. I closed the gap between myself and Ba'al, hugging him goodbye. Kissing him goodbye. "Yeah, I know." I believed him. Then I looked up, and knew what he knew. I stepped out of the way and waved him goodbye. He pressed the button on the hand device before Sg-1 knew what was going on. And he was safe in his ship.
"What the hell was that!" Hello Jack, where have you been? Haven't seen you in ages, you bastard. "You knew he was going to escape, you helped him!"
I choked, tears dripping from my face. I sobbed. "What do you want from me? You took everything I had, my heart, soul, my life. What else do you want to take? I have nothing to offer you!"
"Nothing, we have orders to bring you back." He could be so cold sometimes.
I nodded, no more talking. A part of me wished I had grabbed Grace and ran into the circle, escaping from this emotional hell, going with Ba'al. A wail brought me back to reality. I ran to Grace, hoping she wasn't hurt.
Picking her up, along with her stuffed animal I followed Sg-1 out of the room. "Shhh, Gracie, it's OK. Don't worry, we're going..." I kissed her on the top of her head. Silently crying. "...home"
"Who's the father?" Daniel asked. Not even a hello, or nice to see you Sam? What has gotten into everyone's manors?
Suddenly, I didn't want to go home anymore.
"She's mine, no one elses, just mine."
"Oh, I thought you and Ba'al had a thing going back there." What's with the bluntness. Do you want me to be blunt too Daniel?
"Daniel, you guys didn't RESCUE me. I was happy where I was. We were happy. So don't expect hugs and thank yous. Because frankly, if anything, the only reason I'm in this whole mess is because you could believe that with a step through a ring of blue puddle, you could be anywhere in the galaxy. But you couldn't believe in me. That's the problem here. I was happy with Ba'al." I fingered the soft material on the stuffed toy. "And I will continue to be happy, without you or anyone else in the SGC."
I walked ahead. Listening to the soft cooing of Grace. "Now, if you could, please don't talk to me right now."
"And I hope that since we´re here anyway,
we can end it, saying
Things we´ve always needed to say,
so we can end up staying
Now the story´s played out like this
just like a paperback novel
Let´s rewrite an ending that fits
instead of a Hollywood horror" -- Someday by Nickelback
