Debt
Short Story Two: The Battle They Couldn't Win
He had made the mistake of falling in love with a piratess.
Really. He should have known better.
So he stared down at her sleeping form, watching her rest, searching her breathing for any sign of pain.
Kika was no fun to be around when she was in pain.
Memories of the time after Edgar's death, when Kika sought solace from heartbreak, flooded back.
For the first time ever, Edgar had failed to keep a promise, and Brandeau turned away. Pirates kept no secrets from each other. Everyone had seen her pain.
They followed her regardless.
Her crew, Brandeau's crew, Dario's crew— all of them, down to the last man, would have followed her beneath the waves.
Her Kicked Dogs would lay down their lives for her. She had never asked it, and they all pretended she never would.
But it would come, one day, the battle they couldn't win, the ship they couldn't rob, the brush with the law they couldn't escape.
The death he had been running from for seven years.
His hand reached out almost automatically, feeling her forehead for heat.
Her breathing hitched.
He pulled his hand back, retreated from the room.
Now wasn't the time. He had to launch the Grishend the next day. And in order to do that, he needed rest. As he slipped out of her room in the bar, the room she had inherited from Edgar, he couldn't help but question the wisdom of her decision.
She was still injured. How could she expect to pillage the remains of Cray Trading Company if she couldn't fight in top form? Cray's company guarded its ships well. You had to cripple them, then board them. You couldn't recover cargo from a ship on the ocean floor, and why use up Rune Cannon ammunition otherwise?
There would never be any more ammunition. They needed to conserve what they had.
He paused at the mouth of the cave. Wendy was still cleaning up the bar. He considered helping her, but soon decided against it. Dario could help her while he, Hervey and Kika were at sea.
With Nalleo there to ensure that Dario didn't act like himself, or at least record it when Dario did.
With that thought, he move don from the cave. After a brief row to the other part of the Island, he managed to find the cave where he, Hervey and Dario kept their quarters.
Hervey alone sat awake. He stared into the light of a single candle.
The fire reflected ominously in Hervey's eyes, and Sigurd found it every bit as disturbing as the he had the fist time he had seen Hervey near fire.
Fire helped him, Sigurd knew. Sigurd had seen the calm on Hervey's face when he had seen his first candle. Sigurd had watched Hervey's thrashings still when Kika lit a candle.
"Checking on her?" Hervey asked.
Sigurd nodded.
"I don't like the thought of her fighting Cray's people with broken ribs."
"Then you shouldn't have let her take that blow in the first place."
"Like I could have stopped her from boarding?"
"No, but you couldn't have taken that blow for her."
"That's what you do."
It was true. He did take injuries for her.
But he owed it to her to insure that she bore no injuries.
"What I do is not the matter at hand— it's what you did not do."
"Don't condescend me. I'm not a child."
"You're the reason we're Kika's Kicked Dogs. Act like one of us and admit you should have taken the blow."
"But then I wouldn't be able to perform the duties to which you're going to set me tomorrow. I can't do anything right, can I?"
Sigurd snorted. "There you go— making this about you."
"It was ALREADY about me! What is your PROBLEM?"
And this, Sigurd reflected, was why you didn't allow exact equals near the top of the chain of command.
"Hervey, you're going to wake Dario and Nalleo."
"WILL YOU NEVER CEASE?"
"SHUT UP OVER THERE!" Dario roared. "NALLEO'S TRYING TO SLEEP!"
Nalleo was a shipboy; he and Hervey were First and Second Mate. Nalleo could just deal with it. They needed to settle this.
But they could do it somewhere else.
Sigurd grabbed Hervey's arm and dragged him from the cave.
"Stop that!" Hervey jerked away. "What gives you the right—"
"—I've been here longer than you, that's what! I got kicked first!"
Hervey snorted at him.
They said nothing, only stared at each other in the moonlight.
Hervey hissed, "I hate you right now."
"I know." Unsaid between them lay the words, 'I understand.'
Hervey sighed, ran a hand through his hair, looking at everything but Sigurd.
At length, Hervey surged forwards, his hands gripping Sigurd's shoulders.
"Are you in love with her?" He asked, yanking on Sigurd's shoulders to force him to look Hervey in the eye.
Sigurd looked away. He just couldn't look at the other Kicked Dog.
"You are, aren't you?"
Sigurd said nothing, and Hervey backed away. There was silence between them.
And then Hervey MOVED. He took the few steps between them.
"YOU BASTARD!" He cried. His fist swung out, striking Sigurd's jaw. "Why can't you let me have anything! What, are we joined at the hip?"
Sigurd said nothing— what did you say to that? It didn't even make sense.
"Don't tell me…" He said at length. "Say nothing. I wish to—
"I love her too."
Sigurd rubbed his jaw where Hervey had struck him.
"No. I REFUSE to share her with you. We share too much as it is. I refuse to share her with you!"
"And am I to give her up?"
She was his favorite drug. He needed to be near her. She was like air to him.
Hervey looked away. "I can't ask that of you. I can't give that to you."
"We're at an impasse, then."
"Yeah."
There was silence between them, silence again, crashing down like a weight on his ears.
This was damned stupid. He was going to lose one of his best friends, perhaps his best friend, over a woman?
A woman to whom he happened to owe his life.
When did the world get complicated? He wondered.
Three years earlier, he would have chosen Kika hands-down. Now, however, he felt trapped. How did you choose? He couldn't just give Kika over to Hervey. He couldn't leave her side.
But did somebody like him deserve her?
This was a conundrum.
What do I do?
The next morning, they set sail.
end
