This chapter is kind of random. It goes with the story, but it just kind of came out like this. Tell me what you think. -VJ
The next day was Saturday and the kids wanted to go to the zoo. Benson wanted to go herself, but Stabler had to call Cragen to make sure it would be alright. Cragen was fine with it- there hadn't been any threats to Benson that they knew of. Stabler didn't really want to go to the zoo and hoped that Cragen would say no, but he doesn't always get his way.
Since there were so many of them they had to take two cars. Stabler went with Benson, and the rest of the family went with Kathy. Benson felt awkward. If she wasn't driving she would watch him, talk to him the whole time. She did glance at him a few times, he was quiet, and suspicious of any car that stayed behind them longer then five minutes.
"I can tell if someone's following me" Benson commented as she made a right turn down another street.
"Well, I'm just making sure" he said looking behind the car through the mirror. Benson shook her head. The ride was longer then they thought it would be, or maybe it was just longer then they hoped it would be. Stabler finally drifted off and Benson was glad to see he was getting some rest. At the stop light she couldn't help but look at him. He looked peaceful and so… like himself. She knew he had defenses, he wouldn't allow himself to open up, even to his own wife. But, when someone's sleeping everything you hide during your time awake goes away. Your thoughts drift and your head clears. And for a few hours, or minutes in this case, you feel at peace with yourself.
"Come on lady!" a man shouted from behind which startled her. She realized the light was green and she sped off. She didn't mean to wake him but he opened his eyes as she went over a bump.
"I wasn't sleeping" was the first thing he said.
"Huh?" Benson turned to him like she hadn't known.
"Nothing. Are we close yet?" he asked like a little kid.
"Yeah, we're almost there." She said smiling as she pulled up into the parking lot of the zoo. They had lost Kathy on the way there, and everyone was to meet at one of the restaurants at twelve. Stabler tried to call Kathy, when he finally caught her she said they were stuck in traffic and to go ahead and go in. So, the two of them went into the zoo.
"I love animals" she said as they walked along a path leisurely.
"Why?" he asked disgusted.
"What? You don't like animals?" she looked at him surprised.
"Only the scary ones" he grinned.
"Like what?" she said looking back down at the path as they continued to walk.
"Bats, spiders, big old bears" he smiled widely. She shook her head in dismay.
"How does your wife deal with you?" she grinned, as he shrugged his shoulders.
meanwhile, in another part of the zoo
"She's here"
"Good. Now listen, I don't want you to touch her until I say so."
"I understand"
"Good. Keep an eye on her and the man- he may be trouble later on" the girl hung up the phone. The man she spoke to closed his flip phone and turned to his partner.
"Not yet. But soon" he said as they two men walked off in the direction Stabler and Benson had.
Back with Benson and Stabler
Benson sat down on a small bench that was along the path, Stabler came and sat next to her.
"Can I ask you something?" She questioned as she looked down at her hands.
"Yeah- anything" he reassured her as he turned toward her a little.
"If you found… something that made you happy. If you found this something, but you knew you could never… own it- what would you do?" she asked.
"Hypothetically?"
"Hypothetically" she restated.
"Well, hypothetically, I would probably try to find something that was close to it. When I was a kid, I came to the zoo and all I wanted to see were the flamingos. I was obsessed with them, and so excited to actually get to see one for real. But, when me and my parents got there they said the flamingos had gotten sick and that no one could see them. My dad turned me, as I started to cry, and said 'son, flamingos are a bird- we'll go see the ostridge's instead- it's the same thing'. And ever since then I've never an ostridge or flamingos. So, I guess what I'm saying is that there's a difference between being happy and being satisfied. And if… something makes you happy you should try your best to keep that thing- because god knows these days people are becoming less and less happy" he turned back and looked the other way. Benson started to look up at him, what he said was really sinking in and making sense.
"Come on" she smiled as she grabbed his wrist and pulled him.
"Where are we going?" he asked as she dragged him along. The two men were coming down the path when they spotted Benson and Stabler coming back up, so they dashed into the bushes on the side of the path.
"Just come on" she said excited as she let go of him. They walked for a little bit when she made him stop.
"Ok, close your eyes" she said smiling, and standing in front of him.
"Excuse me?"
"Come on, just do it" she smiled wider, and he started to close his eyes.
"No ticks" he said as he opened them again.
"No tricks I promise" she smiled excitedly as she helped him walk along another small path. He could hear water, it almost sounded like a small waterfall, when she finally stopped.
"Ok, open up" she smiled as she stood next to him. They stood in front of a pond full of flamingos. He couldn't help but smile as he looked away a little.
"Aren't they beautiful?" she asked excited as she stood up proud and happy.
"Yeah, they are" he smiled as he looked out at the pond. He couldn't believe she had taken him here- he was excited- and happy. But, his smile slowly went away as he stood closer to the pond. He looked out at the pond full of flamingos, as Benson got a bit more serious and stood next to him.
"Thank you" he said as he looked out at the pond. Seeing the flamingos weren't what helped him necessarily, it was finally seeing the one thing he always wanted to- but could never bring himself to do. It reminded him of his past, his relationship with father, and his childhood. It brought more meaning then he thought it would. It brought change and acceptance. Maybe he read the situation too deeply, too confused in his emotion. But he was sure of one thing, and that was he knew he had someone near that understood. That cared.
"That's what partners are for" she smiled as she looked at him. After awhile the two of them headed back down the small path and to the lunch areas. Kathy and the kids were there and had saved a table, where all the kids had just gotten their meals. Benson walked up and sat in between one of the twins and Maureen as they both talked to her. Stabler asked about the traffic to Kathy, and soon they sat down too.
phone call
"Get her" the girl glared over the phone."Consider it done. It's time" one of the men smirked
