Sakuraba's Masterpiece of Genius
Author Note: Okay…I can't believe I wrote this. I must have been on the same stuff Sakuraba was on when he wrote his masterpiece! Anyways…I hope you enjoy this!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own so don't sue me for I am broke, poor and have a fear of evil lawyers.
Shin watched Sakuraba scribbling intently in a notebook. He wanted to ask why he had bothered coming over if all he did was bug the heck out him with the scratching of that pencil. He had been listening for two whole hours!
"Hey Shin?"
"Hm?" Shin answered still keeping his eyes on his biology homework. Between homework and football, he had very little time to hang out with anyone which was fine by him. But why did they have to learn about the genetic code? He wasn't going to be genetics and he was planning on being one either.
"Do you want to here my story for creative writing? It's pure genius!" Sakuraba said grinning hopefully at his sullen companion.
Shin nodded slightly to his companion. Smiling Sakuraba cleared his voice. "Once upon a time their lived a handsome, short and wimpy prince named Sena who ruled the largest kingdom in the world." Began Sakuraba mysteriously, "One day, he decided to solve all the problems in his kingdom from the smallest to the largest."
"So this is your genius?" Shin asked glancing over at the cheeky knight. "Seems an overdone fairytale to me."
"Just wait. It gets really good." Sakuraba insured. "SO Sena set out into the deep dark woods of Deimon and found a poor maiden named Mamori. 'What is your problem my lady?' Sena asked bowing. 'It's tragic! My husband, Monta the Monkey King, was kidnapped by the evil demon of the rapid fire' She sobbed."
Shin shook his head at this. He had a feeling that Sakuraba was on something when he wrote this.
"Sena stood up and struck a noble pose.
'I king of the fast paced kingdom shall bring back your hubby and slay the evil demon of the rapid fire!' He declared.
Mamori clasped her hands to her breast and wept for joy. 'O bless ye noble king! I shall be forever in your debt!'
King Sena then leapt aboard his horse and took of back to the castle for reinforcements.
In the courtyard of the castle, he found his most trusted, most loyal, most brave knight training hard. It was none other but Shin the Lionheart, white knight of the western kingdom of light.
Sena leapt from his horse and besieged the knight. 'Shin, I ask for your console and assistance in slaying a monstrous demon and destroying his evil forever.' The noble king said defiantly, "Will you assist me?'
Shin sheathed his mighty lance and bowed to the King Sena. 'I am yours to command my liege. Just let me find my squire Sakuraba the incredibly brilliant and then we shall be off!'"
Shin stared at Sakuraba in shock. "Shin the Lionheart of the western kingdom of light and Sakuraba the incredibly brilliant? What are you on right now?"
"Hey! Do you want to hear the rest or not? And I'm not on anything! Moving on…" He snapped at Shin. "Ahem. Sena, Shin and Sakuraba rode for four days and four nights without sleep, food or water until they approached a cave. This cave was the lair of the humongous ogre of Walnut and he watched are heroes approach in earnest of a meal.
'This will be easy for none is as clever then me!' The ogre chortle in his throat.
The ogre leapt out but found Shin lance unsheathed, Sena's sword at ready and Sakuraba's staff smoking with magic.
'Ack! Don't hurt me! I am Kurita and I am a friendly ogre! I just wanted a sandwich. If you give me one, I tell you how to defeat the demon of the rapid fire!' Kurita cried.
The generous Sena gave the friendly ogre a sandwich that Kurita gobbled up instantly. 'I thank you for your generosity. Now listen carefully, there is a mountain ahead where there dwells a cavern full of bats that guard a bow and arrow of LOVE. Get this bow and arrow of LOVE and you shall smite the demon! See ya!' And with that the ogre Kurita disappeared into his cave."
Shin arched an eyebrow at Sakuraba. "The bow and Arrow of love? Why does this seem wrong?"
"Maybe because you don't understand true love. Now back to our heroes! To make a long story short, the great Sakuraba flashed his dazzling smile and blinded the bats and retrieved the bow and arrow of LOVE and set off to defeat the demon of rapid fire or as it is really called, Hiruma.
It was only four hours before they stood before the lair of the creature in great trepidation. Hiruma screeched inhumanly before leaping onto our heroes claws outstretched ready to render the flesh from their bones in a mere instant." Sakuraba read excitedly.
Shin shook his head at his friend. He was the only person he knew that got excited over his own work like a little school girl. But this was the single most outrageous story he had heard in his life. And that was saying a lot considering all the stories he had heard.
"But his charge was in vain! For the brave, heroic, super amazing and incredibly solemn Shin unsheathed his lance and charged into battle with the demon! The battle was fierce! It was a match between the ultimate evil and the ultimate good. Shin VS Hiruma in a clash of titans!"
Shin rolled his eyes. If Hiruma and he ever did get into a fight, Shin was sure he would be running as fast as he could in the opposite direction away from Hiruma's machine gun.
"The battle lasted for four days and four nights, hours after hours of fiery breath and brilliant sword slashes. Sena and Sakuraba sat on the sidelines watching in awe at the fight occasionally throwing Shin a snack. But then Sakuraba remembered the bow and arrow of LOVE and took it up and yelled to Shin. "Here! Take this bow and arrow and slay this mighty fiend for good!" And with that, tossed it to Shin.
Shin grabbed the bow in his left hand and pulled back the arrow with his right and shot the hellion straight in the heart with the power of LOVE!"
Sakuraba looked up and bit his lip. "Um…Shin? Is this boring you? I could stop now I mean if you don't want to hear the romantic ending."
"Continue." Shin said simply, still not drawing his gaze away from the biology book. Shin never intentional hurt Sakuraba's feelings by ignoring his 'genius'.
"Hiruma staggered back in complete shock as a brand new feeling enter its heart. Love. Love for the one who hit it in the heart. The mighty Shin. Now Shin was a little taken aback by the calm behavior of Hiruma and so turned to the ever clever Sakuraba for answers." Sakuraba read slowly and dramatically, to the annoyance of Shin.
"So Hiruma falls in love with me? What type of twisted story is this?" Shin scoffed finally looking at Sakuraba.
"Just wait! Sena and Sakuraba soon found something interesting! That Hiruma was actual under an evil spell that Sakuraba could easily dispel. After two days of preparation, Sakuraba caste his spell and Hiruma turned into…" Sakuraba trailed off and a nervous grin spread across his face.
"What?" Shin asked giving him an odd look. "What did he turn into?"
Sakuraba took a breath and began again. "Hiruma turned into a hot Amazon chick who's sexiness outshined that of every women under the sun."
Shin gaped at Sakuraba in open shock. "A chick! You made Hiruma a chick!"
"Hey! At least you get a babe! Even if he really is a guy…it would seem a bit awkward…"
"A bit? Hiruma as an Amazon does not put good mental images in my head!" Shin snapped angrily.
"SHH! Let me finish before you go out a tirade! Okay…Shin instantly fell in love with the Amazon and got married to her on the spot and had fifteen kids. These fifteen kids went on to win the Christmas Bowl, take over the world and become world class gun men and women and thus we all lived happily ever!"
Shin cringed inwardly at the marriage part. "So that is your genius? ME and Hiruma get busy and have fifteen kids? What is going on in that perverted mind of yours?"
"You don't like it? But this is the story I am going to turn in for creative writing class!" Protested Sakuraba clutching his paper in a protective stance.
Shin growled and rose to his feet. "No you are not. If you do, I think a certain gun crazy psychopath will be out for your blood."
"How?" Sakuraba asked dumbfounded. "He doesn't know I wrote…" Realization dawned on his face as he stared in shock at Shin. "You wouldn't tell him would you?"
A rare twisted grin appeared on Shin's normally solemn features. "I would without question. Maybe even help him a bit."
Sakuraba looked up in fear. "Hiruma is rubbing off on you isn't he?" Sakuraba whimpered.
"I fucking hope not!" Someone yelled as the door slammed open.
Shin hide a grin as Hiruma shot Sakuraba the evilest look ever know to man kind. Okay, Shin knew about this story and knew he could never convince Sakuraba to abandon his 'master piece' without a bit of persuasion. SO he had informed Hiruma and had agreed on a master plan.
"No I'll ask you nicely," Hiruma said sweetly, clicking the safety off. ", please give me that paper and all your other drafts or you wish you were never born."
Sakuraba literally threw all the copies, drafts and final copy at Hiruma fast we then Sena could run a mile with Cerberus's chasing him. Which was pretty darn fast.
"Their! That is everything! Just don't kill me!" HE whimpered edging out the door before taking off.
Hiruma chuckled cruelly in his throat. "What a pansy! Can't even stand up to a few threats!"
"Okay. Now that you got the papers now you can get the hell out of here." Shin said, still hiding the grin that wanted to come out.
"Man…you got to live a little…Happy hour starts in four minutes." Hiruma suggested shouldering his gun. "Come on! I know you want to!"
Shin gazed at Hiruma levelly. He knew how busy he was with homework, football…"Wait…how do you get your school work done so fast?"
Hiruma grinned. "Have you ever heard of a nerd? Just look at them, and they'll do whatever you want."
Shin shook his head and rose. "Fine. But aren't we to young to drink?"
"Fake license genius." Hiruma said rolling his eyes. "Now let's go before its over! God! Don't you ever get anything down without thinking it over to death? Come on."
Shin sighed and followed Hiruma out the door. Maybe he could enjoy one night on the town with a psychopathic gunmen. But what if Hiruma got drunk? What if he got drunk?
'I'll cross that road when it comes; right now I am going to relax.'
As the two took off toward the nearest bar, a shadowy figure bit his lip and watched them walk down the street. "And thus began the start of a beautiful friendship that would span between the years." The figure whispered quickly. He stood up revealing Sena dressed up like a solider in guerrilla followed by Monta dressed similarly with a camera.
"Do you think this is smart? I mean Hiruma could crush are futures in a millisecond." Monta whispered to Sena worriedly.
"This wasn't are idea! It was Sakuraba's! He knew Shin knew about his paper and would tell Hiruma. Sakuraba's already published his work on Jara Productions and wanted us to tape this." Sena whispered back. "Plus Sakuraba is going to take all the heat for us. Now let's get out of here!"
The two boys take off down the street never noticing that the lens cap was on the entire time…
