Chapter Rating: PG-13 for language

Pairings: Neji x Hina / mentioned: Shika x Temari / Lee x Saku / Cho x Ino

AN: Glossary of most japanese words at the bottom.


III
Never

From the kunoichi, Hinata certainly wasn't the first to have gotten married. No. Ino was the one to beat her to that. Akimichi Ino and Chouji married on his birthday. Ino had been a dazzling bride; which was to be expected from the gorgeous woman. During the past few years, through Sakura; Hinata and Ino became close friends.

The three women were often seen together, along with Temari. Today was no exception as a heavily pregnant Ino with an equally pregnant Sakura sat with Temari and Hinata at a tea house; a discovery of Temari's that the three Konoha kunoichi were very grateful for.

All four women were in a state of deep melancholy that they tried hard to hide from each other, most of all from Hinata. Hinata was a natural worrier, which was probably why she made an excellent medical Nin. She cared. It was three weeks after the wedding and all four kunoichi were without their respective partners.

"This, ladies, is what you get for being wed to impossibly talented shinobi." Temari hiccoughed.

Hinata nervously patted her friend on the back.

"T-t-temari-san, please, not here." She stammered, gently prying the sake bottle from Temari.

Temari smirked but let Hinata have her bottle. She was not a drinker but when Shikamaru was off on missions, she worried to no end. She would be damned though, if Shikamaru ever found out.

Both Ino and Sakura were subconsciously rubbing their swollen bellies. Sakura was well into her eighth month; she wondered if Lee would be home to see their child.

"Must have been terrible on you though, Hina, what, with Neji leaving like that on your first day of marriage." Temari said turning to Hinata, suddenly sober.

Hinata blushed furiously.

"I-iie…This is the path we must follow. Neji-san is ANBU now…His first responsibility is to Konoha."

Temari rolled her eyes and gasped when she felt a kick from underneath the table. She looked across the table. Both Sakura and Ino were glaring at her. It was impossible to tell who had kicked her.

"We-well…It's getting late. I should go. I'll see you tomorrow morning, Ino? And, Sakura, you should take care." Hinata said, after a long silence.

"What? What for? It's only six o'clock." Temari said, blinking.

"I h-have to fix dinner f-for Neji-san…"

"He's back?" Ino asked, blinking.

"I-iie. D-demo, he might be…a-and, I would like to greet him with dinner." Hinata answered, turning crimson.

Both Temari and Ino cocked an eyebrow, while Sakura smiled giddily over the sweetness of it all. Pregnancy had made Sakura unusually sappy. Ino sighed.

"Alright then. Take care, Hina." Ino sighed.

Hinata stepped into the house which she shared only briefly with Neji. Three weeks away on a mission was normal. Usually it was easy not to worry. But not when countries were declaring war among each other. She knew the others felt the same. Chouji, Shikamaru and Lee were all called for a week after Neji. They were all on separate missions and it would only be a matter of time before Temari would be called upon by her younger brother.

The only reason the Godaime did not call for Hinata was because she was needed in the hospitals. Everyday, Jounin, Chuunin and even some Genin returned home from missions of varying levels of danger, injured and needing medical treatment. Otherwise, talented or not, Hinata would have been sent on a mission herself.

She divested herself of her coat and hung it neatly behind the bedroom door. After making sure the heater was working, Hinata took off the long sleeved turtleneck that she had been wearing and replaced it with a lighter, looser, long sleeved shirt.

She walked to the kitchen, tying her long hair up in a bun. She would have stopped growing it long, if Neji had not told her one time that he liked her hair like that.

"Ne, Neji-niisan. Give me a moment." Hinata said, out of breath and pulling out a hair tie.

She tied her hair back clumsily, not used to it being so long.

"I'm going to have to cut it." She murmured to herself aloud.

Turning back to Neji, who was watching her, she went back into fighting stance. Neji cocked his head to one side, regarding his cousin.

"Iie, Hinata-sama." He said, coming over to her and pulling the hair tie from her hair so it fell down, just above her shoulders.

"Keep your hair long. It looks good on you."

Hinata had blushed furiously. Neji had never complimented her on the way she looked before. And he never did again afterwards. So she did as he recommended, and in the end, she liked it like that.

Still, she missed not needing to tie her hair back. She went to her fridge and began taking out the things she would need for tonight's dinner. She had made dinner for two every night for the past three weeks. Maybe it was her way of dealing with Neji's absence.

In the kitchen, Hinata showed the same skill and precision that her husband – she gulped at the word – showed on the battlefield. With her brows furrowed in concentration, she moved around the kitchen masterfully and gracefully, all thoughts on the meal she was preparing, a way of diverting her mind from who she was preparing the meal for.

As Hinata cut the carrots into thin, fine, even sticks, she allowed her mind to wander for a moment. Her relationship with her cousin had always been a strange one. Complicated in ever sense of the word. They did not understand each other and they did not even pretend to. Hinata had failed to realize, until very recently, that the one person whose opinion of her that mattered was not her father, her sister or even Naruto; it was Neji's opinion that meant the world to her. In the end, whose acknowledgement had she fought so hard for?

His.

On her seventeenth birthday, by Hyuuga tradition, she was officially a woman. The party was held in a resort town. The entire village was invited and almost everyone attended.

The entire Hyuuga clan took up one hotel; with Hiashi taking the Imperial Suite and Hinata taking up the smaller but just as grand, Empress Suite. The celebrations lasted nine days, the ninth day Hinata's actual birthday. The Hyuuga clan stayed all nine days, while the villagers were allowed to stayed for only the first three; the first day of their stay was paid by her father. Hanabi had whined that she didn't like her room and that the aunt she was staying with snored. For the last three days, Hinata stayed with their Aunt Chiisai, who indeed, snored.

So every night, for the next three nights, Hyuuga Hinata left her aunt to her deep, sweet sleep and she would walk along the halls of the hotel, which had rooms on one side and then a balcony open to the baths below on the other. The night before her birthday, Hinata left her room again and bumped into Neji.

Looking up at him, anger had flashed in his eyes, a look of pure, unadulterated hatred that had not been in them for a while now, simmered in eyes of white.

"G-gomen nasai, Neji-niisan!" She had stammered.

She tried to put a hand on his arm, to steady herself, but he recoiled at the touch and it sent her stumbling on the ground.

He did not help her up. She wondered dimly to herself as he walked past her, why he was so cruel. She pulled herself up and upon hearing her stand, he had stopped. He turned his head to the side, but did not look at her. It seemed as if he was waiting for something.

When he fully turned around to face her, Hinata did the only thing she could think of. She smiled at him.

Neji blinked, several times and then the anger was back and he had her against the wall, staring down at her. She had stared up at him in wide eyed disbelief. He was hurting her.

"N-neji-niisan!" She had exclaimed.

He shook her as much as the wall behind her would allow.

"Do something. Do something!" He spat in her face.

She was confused, confused beyond all imagining.

"D-do what, Oniisan?" She cried, her arms would be bruised tomorrow. Her head hurt.

He shook her again.

"Do what the others would do. Hurt me. Punish my damned existence! Just don't stand there like you don't know what I'm talking about!"

She had been bewildered.

"Sumimasen, demo…I-I don't understand Oniisan!"

That's when he had struck her and she fell, crumpled on the floor, like a draft of a letter too insubstantial to continue.

Hinata hissed as she cut her finger with the knife. She washed her wound and applied a simple healing technique onto it. Once she was satisfied that her finger would no longer bleed, she began putting all the ingredients in a pot and began to cook, making the soup. Dressed chicken was ready, waiting for her to pop it into the oven. Desert was already in the fridge, waiting to be eaten.

The soup was quick and easy to make. Once she was sure it was done, she turned off the gas and closed the lid of the pot. She put the chicken into the oven and turned it on. She would have an hour or so to take a bath and prepare the dining table. She would bathe first.

Steam filled the bathroom and Hinata perched the timer onto the sink, to ensure she would not lose track of time and let the chicken burn. Sliding in, into the hot water, Hinata sighed. She caressed her cheek, and in her mind, she still felt the sting of his slap there.

One of their second cousins had walked out then. A member of the main house, Hyuuga Seijaku meant trouble for Neji if he had seen what had just occurred. Neji had stood straight, looking at Seijaku straight in the eyes.

Seijaku's gaze went from Neji to Hinata. His eyes widened.

"What is the meaning of this?" He asked coldly, staring Neji in the eye.

Neji did not answer. As Hinata climbed to her feet for the second time in five minutes, she answered her cousin.

"Betsu ni, Seijaku-san." Hinata answered. "Please. Go back to sleep."

"Iie, Hinata-san. I will have to report this to your father."

Then, calmly as she could, Hinata shook her head.

"That will not be necessary, Seijaku-san. Please, do not bother yourself. I merely tripped and fell. Neji-niisan just has very bad timing." Hinata had been impressed with herself. Her voice did not tremble at all, and she could look Seijaku straight in the eyes as she lied right to his face.

"Iie! That is not true! I s--" Seijaku stopped.

Spying was not tolerated. Especially spying on the Hyuuga Heir. Hinata raised an eyebrow.

"Oyasumi nasai, Seijaku-san." She said softly.

Seijaku retreated to his room and Hinata let out a sigh of relief. She turned her attention back to Neji, who had his narrowed eyes on Seijaku's door. He turned back to look at her.

"Why?" He asked, his trademark mask of calm back again. Hinata could barely believe he had ever let it slip.

"Why what Oniisan?"

The mask broke again and he had her pressed against the walls again. Yes. She would have bruises on her arms.

"Why won't you treat me like the others do? Why don't you make use of the fucking mark on my forehead? WHY?"

"Please! Neji-niisan! Don't shout! Seijaku-san is already suspicious and he'll tell Otousan about this and then--"

"I don't give a damn! Tell me! Why won't you hurt me!"

Hinata's eyes softened then.

"Neji-niisan. Is this what it's all about? You want me to hurt you?"

She tried to move a hand up so she could touch his face, but he had her firmly pinned by the arms. She tried again, and this time he relinquished her a little, enough for her to slip a hand beneath the hitai-ate he wore and touch the mark there.

"Why would I?" She whispered.

"Why won't you." He hissed back.

"Because, Neji-niisan…" she moved her hand so that his hitai-ate fell off and landed on the ground with a clink. "It would prove them right. If I turned and hurt you just because you provoked me. It would prove them right. They would be right. It would show that I am weak. They will know I am weak."

His eyes dissolved into hers after that. Foreheads pressed against each other, Hinata shuddered slightly. She did not believe she had touched him on his forehead, the one place he did not like being touched. And now he was touching his against hers and Hinata wondered dully if somehow, the mark would be transferred onto her forehead by some miracle. For they all knew that Neji deserved to be in the main house and she in the branch house. Yes, fate was cruel like that sometimes.

"Iie, Hinata-sama." He whispered.

Hinata shivered. It was cold. December was always cold. But she knew she didn't shiver because of it.

"Iie, Hinata-sama. You will never. Never. Never be weak. You were never weak. You are not weak. Never."

They stood like that for hours. He seemed to whisper it to her over and over. Never. Never. Never. Each time he said it, Hinata felt sure it was true. Never. Never. Never. She was never weak. Never never never. At least not in his eyes. No. Not 'at least'. No. She was never weak. Never never never, because she was never weak in his eyes.

In his blanched, pained eyes.


Glossary:
Kunoichi - female ninja
Iie - No
Gomen Nasai - Sorry
Sumimasen - Sorry
Demo - but
Betsu ni - It's nothing
Hitai-ate - the forehead protector

If i've missed out anything/made any mistakes, please feel free to correct me. Arigatou gozaimasu.