A/N: Hello everyone! Yeah, they sang that song. I was afraid that one of the many SSBM Idol storys were gonna use it or something! Hehe.Glad you all liked the play Enjoy this chapter!
Lord of the Rings: (SSBM Style!)
Too Many Towers to be Two
Chapter XVII- Happy, Happy Hobbits! BEEP!
"H3lm5 D33p h45 bu7 1 w34kn355...A 5m4ll dr41n 7h1n9y..."
---Isengard---
"WTF d00d?" Ganondorf asked, walking towards Mewtwo. "H0w c4n f1r3 und0 s70n3?!"
"HEY!" Mewtwo yelled, grabbing Ganondorf's hand. "What have I told you about using the PAPER!" He pointed to a pad of paper and pen. "HMPH! Anyway, to answer your question, No I am not a cross-dresser!"
"o.o?" Replied Ganondorf.
"Eh, oops, I mean... If the wall is breached, Helm's Deep will fall!"
Ganondorf reached for the pad and wrote down: 'But My Lord, it will take an army of computer generated proportion to storm the keep!'
"Indeed it will!" Mewtwo lead him out to his balcony, which over looked about 10,000 Uruk-Hai's, all cheering and stomping. Ganondorf gasped and Mewtwo lifted his hand. "A NEW POWER IS RISING!" He yelled over the ranting.
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cheered the Uruk-Hai's.
"IT WILL WIN!" Mewtwo also announced.
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cheered the Uruk-Hai's.
"THIS NIGHT... Or a Night coming up very soon, THE LAND WILL BE STAINED WITH THE BLOOD OF ROHAN!"
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cheered the Uruk-Hai's.
"MARCH TO HELM'S DEEP! LEAVE NONE ALIVE!"
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cheered the Uruk-Hai's.
"TO WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR!"
"WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Cheered, ah you know.
Ganondorf began to cry at the very sight of the lovely forces while Mewtwo gave another one of his smirks for Pokemon: The First Movie. "There will be no dawn for men..." He said with a laugh.
And so the Uruk-Hai's head out of Isengard, heading towards Helm's Deep...
---Fangorn Forest---
Falco and Luigi we're both resting on top of DK in his Treebeard suit when they saw some smoke rising from into the sky. "Smoke?" Luigi asked, looking over at Falco, who shrugged.
"Ah, there is always smoke rising from Isengard these days..." DK said, marching on.
Falco sat up. "Isengard?" The two hobbits climbed up the to the top of Treebeard and turned towards where the smoke was coming from.
"Ah, yes. Saruman. He used to come and walk in my woods- Blah, Blah, Blah." DK Went on ranting.
"It's Saruman's army..." Falco said, staring at the 10,000 troops marching towards Helm's Deep. "War's stared!"
Luigi sighed. "And were are WE during all this?" The two looked down at DK, who was still ranting, and sighed.
---Erm, River---
Marth was floating along a river, wondering what happened to him. "Where am I...Who are you...Who am I..." He washed up onto the shore of a beach and closed his eyes, taking a nap. He slept for a little bit, till a horse walked up to him and began to lick his face. "Hmm, Arwen..." He muttered, before frenching the horse until his opened his eyes. ".........Oh........god......." He stood up slowly, backed away a little, then released the horse was there to save him and hopped on.
---Rivendell---
Zelda was lying down in her bed, looking off into space when Fox walked in. "Arwen™? What are you going here? You're suppose to be in 'The Two Towers™'."
"Well, I am..." Zelda said, rolling over.
"Oh. Alright, well now get your pretty little ass out of bed and get on those ships. They're leaving!"
"NO!" She yelled, standing up. "DADDY! I'M A GROWN GIRL! I CAN MAKE MY OWN CHOICES IN LIFE! I. AM. STAYING!"
Fox sighed. "Listen. If Aragorn™ does survive the war, which he won't, and you guys get married and are all happy... We'll, he'll STILL die. By sword or age, his life is limited. Then you'll be all, 'WAAAAAAAAAAH!' for thousands of years, till you commit suicide...I guess..."
"Don't lie..."
"WHAT?! I, ELROND™, A LIER?!"
Zelda nodded. "Elves can die of a broken heart too, y'know!"
"Says who?"
"Says the Big Book of Elven Rules!" She held up a big thick book reading: The Big Book of Elven Rules.
Fox rolled his eyes. "And just why would YOU have that book?"
"Because, MY ears are REAL!" She reached forward and began to tug on Fox's ears. Of course, she forgot that Foxes have somewhat pointed ears, as well.
"OWIES!" He yelled, pushing Zelda away and rubbing his ears.
The Princess gasped in shocked. "Your ears are real too?"
"YES! And because you hurt your Dada, you've gotta sail away with us!"
"...Darn it..."
---Later On---
Fox stood in a tower, watching as the elves left Rivendell with lanterns and cloaked in capes. "Goodbye my little Elves! I'll see you in 5 Years!" He said, waving them goodbye.
Peach then appeared behind Fox, talking on her magic cell phone. "Like, NO WAY! Oh, are you serious? Ok. I've gotta call Toad and, we'll like, paint our nails or something. Hang on." She pressed the end button, then went into voice dial.
"Name please." Came the voice of the sexy mystery woman.
"Home." Peach said, very clearly.
"Calling, Mom's Cell."
"WHAT?! I said, HOME! HOME!" She yelled into the phone.
"Would you like to place a call?" Asked the voice, who now, somehow, has turned into an Old Lady.
"Huh? NO!"
"PEACH!? PEACH IS THAT YOU!?" Came the voice on another old lady. "PEACH! YOUR FATHER IS STARTING TO SMELL! COME LET US OUT OF THIS CAVE! WE SAID YOU CAN HAVE THE CAR WHEN YOU'RE 18! Are you 18 yet?"
Peach threw her phone to the ground and stepped on it a few times, reducing it to pieces. She then looked up and saw Fox staring at her confused. "Oh yeah..." She cleared her throat and began, "The time of the Elves... is over. Do we leave Middle-Earth to it's fate? Do we let them stand alone?"
Fox shrugged and turned around. "Meh, not my people."
---Cave---
Crazy Hand untied and removed Ness's and Dr. Mario's blindfolds, then floated away without a word. "Woah... We're are we?" Dr. Mario asked, looking around.
Roy walked up to the two of them and sat down on a rock. "My men tell me that you are Orc Spies."
"Spies?!" Ness yelled. "Do we LOOK like spies?!"
"Well then, what are you."
The two looked at each other. "Uh..."
"Speak!"
"We're..." The two began to break out into a little dance. "Hobbits! We're Hobbits! We're happy, happy Hobbits! We live in holes-"
"Okay, that's enough!" Roy said, quickly covering his ears. "Now, tell me your names."
"Frodo!"
"Sam!"
Roy counted. "Two...Uh, where is Yoshi?"
"Yoshi?" Ness asked. "There was no other. You're seeing things. We set out from Rivendell with seven others. One we lost in Moria. Two were my kin. There was an Elf and a midget. And two men, Aragorn, son of Arathorn and...and...blast, who was the other guy?" Ness asked, leaning over towards Dr. Mario.
"Borry." He replied.
"Oh yes. Thanks." Ness continued, "And Boromir of Gondor."
Roy looked shocked at the two. "You were a friend of Boromir?"
"Hell no! He tired to kill me!" Ness paused. "But yes, for my part. I guess..."
The redhead sighed and looked towards the ground. "Then it would grieve you to learn that he's dead."
It was time for Dr. Mario and Ness to get shocked expressions. "OMFG LIEZZZZZZZ!" Yelled Ness. "How?! When?! Did YOU know about this?" Dr. Mario shook his head.
"As one of his friends, I'd hope you'd know...." Roy paused. "He was... my brother."
"SUPER MEGA ULTRA RARE GASP!" Dr. Mario and Ness, uh, gasped, taking a step back away from Roy. "IT CAN'T BE!"
"Search your feelings." Roy replied. "You know it to be true."
---Flashback---
Captain Falcon stood on top of a building in Osgiliath, holding a Gondorain flag. "This place!" He said to the crowd below him. "This place was once a great place to chill! And it shall be again, for it has been reclaimed!" The crowd cheered. "For Gondor!"
"For Gondor!" Repeated the Crowd.
"For Gondor!"
"For Gondor!"
"FOR GONDOR!
"FOR GONDOR!"
Captain Falcon turned and began to head towards the ground muttering, "Damn parrots..." He walked towards the crowd and up towards Roy and Crazy Hand. Captain Falcon and Roy ran to each other and gave one another a great big hug filled with love and care and all other joyful words.
"Good Speech." Roy said with a smile. "Nice and short."
Captain Falcon picked up a random mug and lifted it to the sky. "Leaves more time for drinking! Break out the ale, we should be having a FEISTA!"
"YESSS!" Cheered Crazy Hand, who promptly ran off and drank himself silly.
After a while of drinking and cheering, Captain Falcon threw his arm around Roy and said, "Remember today, Little Bro. Life was good."
Roy nodded with a smile, took a sip and turned towards the entrance. His smile quickly faded as he saw who was marching up towards them. "...Shit..."
"Hm?"
"It's...him..."
Captain Falcon's eyes fell upon the person Roy was talking about. "...Great..."
Mr. Game & Watch was making his way through the crowd, whacking random soilders in his way with his bell. "Where is Boromir, BEEP?!" He yelled, knocking out the drunken Crazy Hand.
"One moment of peace, can't he give us that?" Captain Falcon said to Roy, before heading over to he 2-D creature to stop his rein of terror. "Father!"
"There is Gondor's finest, BEEP! There is my first born, BEEP!" Mr. Game & Watch said, grabbing Captain Falcon in a hug. "I heard you almost blew up the world by yourself, BEEP!"
Captain Falcon shook his head and smiled. "No, I had help from Faramir."
Roy walked over towards the two. Mr. Game & Watch growled at the redhead and met him halfway. "Yes, but if it wasn't for HIM the city wouldn't have been taken in the first place, BEEP!"
"Our numbers were too few..." Roy whispered.
Mr. Game & Watch let go and laughed. "Oh, yes, BEEP! Waaaaay too few, BEEP!" Mr. Game & Watch then began to whack Roy over the head with his bell until he heard Captain Falcon whisper into his ear,
"You give him no credit and yet he tries to do your will!"
"BEEP!" The 2-D man let go of Roy and followed Captain Falcon into a building.
"He loves you father!" Captain Falcon told Mr. Game & Watch, who just beeped.
"I don't care about Faramir, BEEP! He's too pretty, so we gotta keep him down, BEEP!"
Captain Falcon rolled his eyes. "Oh, what is he now, Cindaroya?"
"Yes, BEEP! Yes he is, BEEP!" Captain Falcon was about to leave when Mr. Game & Watch grabbed his arm. "Listen, BEEP! Elrond of Rivendell is having a meeting, BEEP!"
"Good for him."
"It is rumored that he has found the weapon of the giant evil hand, BEEP!"
"...The one ring?"
Mr. Game & Watch nodded. "Yes, BEEP! Do your old father a favor and go get it for me, BEEP!"
"NO!" He yelled, walking out from under the building, the beeping man hot on his heels. "My place is here with my people, not in Rivendell!"
"BEEP!"
Roy took a step up. "If there is need to go to Rivendell, then... you could send me..."
Mr. Game & Watch turned around and glared at Roy. "NO, BEEP! NO, NO, NO, BEEP!"
WHACK!
---Later on---
Captain Falcon rode his horse out into the main square of the city and looked around. "Brother!" He looked down and saw Roy running up to him.
"Faramir? What are you doing? You know it is forbidden!"
"Shut up. I just wanted to... see you off, that's all."
Captain Falcon sighed and looked down at Roy, who had a very large bump on his head. "Remember today, little bro." He said, before he rode his horse away, never to be seen again.
To Be Continued...
A/N: Hmm. I hope I didn't do anything wrong by making Captain Falcon somewhat 'cool' in this chapter. He's always beat up, poor guy! And he's one of the best Smashers!
Captain Falcon: Show me your moves! Show me your moves! Show me your moves!
Oh, yeah, THATS the reason. Popo!
Popo: -Lifts his mallet- MAWHAHAHAHA!
BASH! BASH! BASH!
