The Anime House Special: President Keitaro

Chapter 2

A very OOC fanfic by SSJ2 PikaFlash, full of Vitamins and Minerals

Disclaimers: As usual, all characters, cast, crew, ideas, blackouts and bashings belong to
their respective owners...

Summary: (AU type of fanfic) The Hinata district is one of the most important part of the political structure of Japan, as that one area holds the key to voting who would be the President of Japan.


The next day

Kitsune woke up with a huge hangover. Then, she got up and looked at the fax machine and the form.

"What the...!"

Kitsune quickly took the form from the fax machine and quickly head towards Kanako's room.

"Kanako! Kanako! We got big trouble!"

"What is it?"

"Read this."

Kanako reads the form. "What the...!" Kanako quickly ran back to the office...


"What the...!"

Kero was in his office back in Tokyo with on the speakerphone.

"How did that happen? It better not be your drunk stunt again, Kanako! This is much more worst than you vomiting onto US President Max Tate!"

Kanako: But you suggested that it would be a last minute thing. 'The element of surprise. The Art of War?'

"Forget the freaking Art of War!" Kero screamed.


At the other end, Kanako was rubbing her head from a hangover as Kitsune was listing to Kero on speakerphone.

"But what about the form? We can't change the name." Kitsune explained.


"Well, think of something."

Kero opens his desk drawer and pulled up a carton of pudding from the drawer and opens it. Then, Kero began to silently take some bites on the pudding.


As Kitsune was thinking, Kanako took out some warmed Sake from the microwave and began drinking, silently.

Kitsune: I got it! If the name for the people on the form says they want a PresidentKeitaro Urashima, then we'll give them Keitaro Urashima for President!

Kero: Keeping our promise... Great idea, Kitsune.


Keitaro's house

"No! What gave you the idea of making me a candidate for being President?"

Kitsune was sitting next to Keitaro at the dinner table in the kitchen.

"What about the inn? The place where your friends work at?"

"But I have no intention to become President of Japan."

"Why don't you give it time to consider?"

"No. I'm going out for a walk."

As Keitaro was about to leave, Sarah ran into the kitchen.

"Bad news, we aren't getting the entitlements we need," Sarah said.

"What! How did you know?"

"Its on the news. If that is true, then Haruka won't get her retirement money too and
this month's pay!"

Keitaro looked at Kitsune.

"I think I'm going to run for President."

"But don't you have to give speeches?" Sarah asked.

Keitaro shrugged. "I don't think so..."


Meanwhile, Taichi was practising his golf skills at putting at his mansion. As Taichi tries to putt the ball in, the golf ball was nowhere near the hole. Taichi looks at his butler. The butler takes out a remote control moves the joystick and the golf ball went straight into the hole.

Radio: We interrupt your normal listening program for a special announcement from the Pudding Political Party...

Kero's Voice: I believe that I have found the right person to run for President for the PPP.

The announcement caught Taichi's attention.


Kero was in front of a crowd in front of the Hinata Inn with Kanako, Kitsune and Keitaro at the side.

"And now! The person who is going to be the next President of Japan for the PPP...Keitaro Urashima!"

Keitaro shakes his head.

Kitsune quickly whispered to Kero, "Keitaro can't do speeches."

"Not to worry. He just need to say a few words."


Keitaro fainted but Kanako and Kitsune quickly grabbed Keitaro.

"Not to worry," Kanako said. "The words of the people are enough for his support."


Taichi hears Kanako's words and angrilly swings his golf club...
"Keitaro, do not worry. I have something that would help you deal with speeches," Kanako said as she and Kitsune help carry Keitaro.
Taichi drives off on his golf buggy as Taichi's butler tries to take down a bent golf club from a tree branch above him.
Pudding Political Party West Hinata Branch

Keitaro was taking notes as Kanako was with Kitsune at a whiteboard and Keitaro was on a classroom desk.

"Keitaro, the first thing about being a Presidential candidate is that you must remember your priorities and set them straight. You see, being a president is like getting married."

Kitsune stood next to Keitaro, acting like a bride.

"There are things to do before getting the job. Like giving a speech."

"But, I'm not good at speeches," Keitaro said.

"No problem, I know a tip that could help you with that problem, but first, lets
start the training."


Keitaro's house

"'Being a president is like getting married', yeah right. I bet she's never been married before." Keitaro mumbled at the dinner table where Kitsune, Naru, Shinobu, Sarah and Su were eating dinner.

"But don't you think she is giving some advice?" Naru said.

"I know, but its just that I feel as if things are always going her way," Keitaro said.

"Well...she was the best politician we had before the President Tate incident."

"Do you think Kanako will mind if I do things my way?" Keitaro asked Kitsune.


Keitaro was following Kanako and Kitsune on the way to the press conference.

"Hey, Kanako, what was the tip that you wanted to give me?"

"Oh, that? Well, I kinda "borrowed" that from a Simpsons' Episode. If you are really nervous in doing speeches, imagine the people in their underwear."

"But is it alright for me to do it by myself first?" Keitaro asked.

"Mind? Of course I don't mind. Go ahead." Kanako let Keitaro go first.


Keitaro was put in a news conference. Actually, he's standing near a sign reading "Meet Keitaro Urashima here".

"Well, I just want to say that I intend to reopen the Hinata Inn..."

Kasumi: Is this some sort of a joke, Mr. Urashima? How do you think you can do about the Hinata Inn? Is it because you haven't planned ahead?

Eriol: How are you going to pay for the inn? Its not as though you are a rich man even though you used to own the inn.

Keitaro looked around nervously as questions continue to hit him without giving Keitaro a chance to answer. Remembering Kanako's tip, Keitaro looked around, only to see the reporters still in their clothes, but as Keitaro looked down, he was in his underwear. At
that instant, Keitaro faints.

"I think that's all we have for today," Kanako told the press, "We'll have this conversation at another time."


Taichi's Mansion

Taichi was reading the paper when he saw the headline. The moment he read it, he quickly made a phone call...


Shirai and Haitani made their way to Taichi's mansion. Taichi throws the paper at Shirai, with the headlines, "Controversy over Inn closure. Entitlements will not be given. Keitaro said to be next President."

"Well, they didn't say that you were involved," Shirai said after reading the article.

"Other than 65 percent of the voters. What the freak just happened there?" Taichi asked. "How did the papers get this?"

Shirai and Haitani shrugged.


The night before, at the Beef Bowl shop.

Shirai and Haitani were full from eating bowls of Beef Udon.

"That was a great meal," Shirai said as he sat back on his chair.

Haitani did the same. "Yeah, let's go to the men's room."


Shirai and Haitani were in the men's room washing their hands.

"Do you think those Innkeepers will complain if they do not get their entitlements?" Shirai asked.

"For US30 grand per staff member, no chance. What difference will it make?" Haitani said with a chuckle.

A flush was heard and Eriol Hiragizawa from 'Inside Japan' walked out from the cubicle behind Shirai and Haitani.

"Well, we just have to find out," Eriol said as he walked to the sink and washed his hands.

Shirai and Haitani looked at each other.


Present day

Taichi stared at Shirai and Haitani.

"You pair of moronic bastards."


Kanako and Kitsune were helping Keitaro up to the PPP Office of West Hinata.

"I'm sorry, I guess it was too much for me," Keitaro said.

Kanako pats Keitaro's back and said, "Not to worry. I will do whatever I can to help you."


Keitaro was blindfolded while trying to use a stick to beat up a box of majority votes
hanging on a rope like a pinata, with the votes spilling out like candy.
Kanako passed a baby doll for Keitaro to kiss.

Kanako: If you know the right way to do this, you're sure to get the votes of the mothers.


A cardboard cutout of a voter popped up, with the appearence of a businessman to shake hands with Keitaro.
A cardboard cutout of a lawyer popped up, with Keitaro shaking the hand.
A cardboard cutout of Taichi popped out willing to shake hands with Keitaro, but Keitaro punches the cardboard cutout.

"And that's for the inn."

As the cardboard was on a pop up device, it flew back at Keitaro and knocked him to the ground.


Keitaro whacks the pinata box, getting the majority votes.

"You did it!" Kanako cheered. "Now, you're ready to take the ride to become President!"

"And save the inn," Keitaro said.

Kanako stopped Keitaro. "Lets put that on hold first. We need to address the other major issues, before the inn."


Taichi's Mansion

Kanako was in Taichi's living room.

"So, you are willing to throw all the votes to me." Taichi stood up and said, "But why help me win when I've already got a huge advantage."

"I know every strategy that Keitaro would be using, because I am the one who makes the strategies and plan his campaign," Kanako said. "And not to mention a particular bribe involving the pay belonging to the Inn Workers."

Taichi stood up. "And what do you want out of this?"

"If I can't get the role of the President, then I would have to make do being Vice-President."

"Very well. In return for your most generous favor, I would like to give you 20 percentof the 'donation'."

Kanako shakes her head. "No...its not about the money. I just want the position."

"But I insist," Taichi said. "After all, consider it a welcoming gift for your defection to the Totally Digital Party."

Kanako decided that accepting Taichi's offer is a good idea. "Alright. I'll take the money."

Taichi takes a bottle of Brandy and pours it into two glasses. "Then, 10 percent it is."

"10 percent!" Kanako exclaimed.

"Hey, you said its not about the money. Let us drink to that."

As Taichi gave a glass to Kanako, Kanako quickly poured a little bit more brandy into her glass before drinking it.

End of Chapter 2