Disclaimer: I don't own YYH.
Authoress Note: Wow, three chapters in a row! I'm on a roll! Anyway, Enjoy! This might be one of the not-as-good-as-the-rest chapters, but I know Hisan had been waiting patiently for it, so I put it up anyway. This may be revised and/or extended later. More updates to come soon!
Chapter Three
Simple as Pink and Black
(March 30th, Reikai: Six years after the series ended.)
It was a normal morning for Botan. She was awakened by the sound of ogres walking past her room on business and such, and by the quiet, mulled rushing of the massive River Styx, which was visible from her window. Sitting up and rubbing the sleep from her eyes, she reached for the black book that she kept next to her bed when she was asleep, the one that told her whose soul to take. (When the gang wasn't on a mission, she resumed her normal duties.)
Reading the latest entries, which the book itself added overnight, she grimaced. Among several natural deaths was one murder, one suicide, and an accident involving a speedboat. Pleasant. Yawning, Botan sat up and got out of bed, stretching before walking over to her closet, pulling the robe she'd slept in closer around her body. Throwing open her closet, she prepared to pick out one of her pink kimonos, which she usually wore when on duty for Reikai. What she saw, however, was each and every one of her kimonos covered in patches of black dye.
Her face slowly started to turn red with anger and realization. Someone had snuck into her rooms last night when she was asleep and stolen her kimonos, staining them with the black and then returning them carefully. Curse that Tequila that she'd just had to have! Normally the ferry girl was a very light sleeper, but even a glass of wine made her sleep like a baby through the night. Damn alcohol.
Anyway, her face now a brilliant shade of crimson, Botan let out a frustrated cry and stomped over to her dirty-clothes hamper, where she'd thrown her kimono from the day before. A dirty kimono, she decided, was better than a stained one, but when she got to the wicker hamper and opened it, she noticed her black-dye wielding friend had thought of that. At the bottom of the hamper was a pink-striped box, with the words, "Victoria's Secret," on it. Curious, she picked it up. She'd never heard of anything like that, but when she opened it up she lifted it's contents up before her eyes in utter horror.
"What in the…" she muttered, her eyes wide. Before her was a baby pink lingerie nightgown with black lace sewn onto the top and along the spaghetti-strap shoulders. It looked like it covered only what needed to be covered to remain PG-13 rated.
"AGH! Only one person would do this! There's only one man in all three worlds who A, knows me, B, is perverted, and C, is OBSESSED WITH APRIL FOOL'S DAY! YUSUKE URAMESHI, COME OUT SO I CAN KILL YOU!"
Yusuke burst through the door, laughing hysterically.
"You should've seen yourself! My GOD was that good!"
"Yusuke, do you know how much those kimonos cost? You'd better hope those stains come out, or you're paying for replacements!" Botan summoned her oar, preparing to strike at any time.
Yusuke didn't look worried. "I know how expensive kimonos are, Botan. And I also know that those kimonos are standard Reikai-issue. So HA!" Yusuke had stopped laughing for the moment and wore a triumphant look. "Besides, it's just a joke. No hard feelings, right?"
A dark look overcame Botan's face. "No…hard…feelings…? Of course, Yusuke. NO. HARD. FEELINGS. WHAT. SO. EVER!" With each syllable at the end of her statement, she hit Yusuke with the oar, harder each time. On the last time, the paddle part broke off with a resounding 'crack.'
Yusuke had now been beaten to the floor. Taking the opportunity, he scrambled away, rubbing his head as he stood. Botan was looking blankly from the jagged stump of wood in her hands to the flat part that had once been connected. Back and forth she looked for a minute before looking up and over to Yusuke and yelling, "NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!"
Yusuke inched toward the door, feeling for the knob. "Well, Botan, no matter how much I'd love to stay and chat, I have prior engagements to attend to. See ya later!" Yusuke, who had found the knob, turned and threw open the door, tearing off at full speed.
Botan walked into Koenma's office looking quite miserable. But her expression was only the beginning.
With no other option since she left her human clothes with Genkai, Botan had been forced to borrow clothes from Hinageshi, since the Reikai-issue kimonos had to be ordered from the workshops. And ridiculous doesn't even begin to cover it.
The wraparound white shirt, which was normally secured by the high pants, was too short and was tied with a makeshift sash. It was a belly-shirt on the tall woman. The pants, which were red miko-style ones supposed to be worn up past the belly-button, were like hip-huggers and barely went down past Botan's knees. The effect was a very skimpy priestess.
Koenma looked his worker up and down with wide eyes, leaning over to the ogre and whispering a bit too loudly, "Man, I never would've though Botan would be into that kind of thing. But honestly, strippers dressed as priestesses? What is the world coming to?"
"I am NOT a stripper!" Botan shouted, stomping up to the desk. "I had to borrow Hinageshi's clothes because mine were all ruined!"
Koenma sat back and said,"Oh, sorry." in a tone that clearly said he wasn't. God, he was annoying sometimes.
"Koenma, I've had a really bad day. PLEASE say I can use a vacation day!" Botan's tone was strained, embarrassed, and exasperated al at once. She seemed to ignore Koenma's not beleiving her.
"Sure, we'll have Ayame cover things for you. Just don't have too much fun, Botan…"
"I AM NOT A STRIPPER!"
It was a normal morning for Hiei. He woke up, the birds were singing, the tree's leaves were rustling slightly in the breeze, and there was a mirror nailed to the bark on the tree.
Wait, that wasn't normal. That wasn't normal at all.
Hiei looked puzzled as he sat up all the way and leaned forward. Then a look of pure horror overtook his face, and he fell not-so gracefully from the tree.
Yusuke was leaning up against the bottom, laughing at a tiny portable TV set, playing and replaying something twice before setting it down and jogging over to the bush Hiei had landed in. The fire demon was sprawled out with his eyes closed in the bush. It now was apparent why he'd fallen.
The whitish part of his hair, which was normally just a shiny white, had been dyed a horrific shade of hot pink.
Yusuke continued to laugh insanely.
"Detective," Hiei growled dangerously, not opening her eyes or getting up, "Why aren't you running yet?"
"Because as soon as I reveal an important tidbit of info, you won't hate me anymore."
"And why is that?" Hiei's eyes snapped open.
Yusuke pulled a pink bottle that matched the shade of Hiei's hair. He brandished it out at Hiei. "This stuff comes out after 1 washing! It's only temporary!"
"Move your thumb, detective." Hiei said, sitting up. Yusuke obliged, and Hiei's expression darkened considerably, save for a malicious glint in his crimson eyes. "Detective," he said slowly and murderously, "That says '100'. Not '1'. I HAVE TO WASH MY HAIR ONE HUNDRED GODDAMN TIMES!"
Yusuke turned the bottle around. "Heh, er, Hiei, it was an honest mistake, I swear! I found it in Keiko's medicine cabinet! I must've covered the other two zeros with my thumb when I borrowed it, too!"
Hiei was now standing and advancing on Yusuke slowly. Yusuke was stepping back at the same speed.
Yusuke considered his escape options and came up empty. "Oh, crap."
So, how was it? I hope you all liked it, please review! -turns into hobo holding out a tin can- Reviews for the poor?
