Her hair, her face, her beautiful blue eyes. How she always wanted to be better than everyone else at everything, to the point of never allowing O-Ren to be the one on top when they were together in bed. She loved Beatrix's stubbornness, her determination, her strength, both physical and emotional.
And she told her that everyday. And Beatrix would just smile. O-Ren knew she didn't feel the same way. She loved Bill. She never loved O-Ren. Maybe as a friend, but nothing else. What they had, it meant nothing to Beatrix. It was just lust, plain and simple.
But still, O-Ren loved her. And that's why, in the wedding chapel in El Paso, she made sure she was the one landing the strongest blows on the woman's body. She felt angry, she felt betrayed, she felt sad. At Beatrix, and at Bill. At Bill for getting her girl pregnant. Her girl, not his girl. And at Beatrix for leaving her for that excuse for a human being. For being pregnant with Bill's child.
But going into that chapel and trying to kill Beatrix was a decision she'd soon regret making. And when she heard the woman had woken up, she felt happy. Happy that she was ok. And she felt afraid, for she knew she was coming for her.
And when she finally got to O-Ren, killed her employees, killed her bodyguard and mutilated her friend, O-Ren felt happy. She didn't care about the Crazy 88. She didn't care about Gogo. She didn't care about Sofie. All she cared about was Beatrix, and the fact that she was seeing her again.
So she went to the garden of the restaurant and cried her eyes out. She cried tears of joy, not of sadness. And when she saw Beatrix sliding those doors open and walking into the garden, she knew she was going to die. But she was going to die happy.
And when she did, she made sure Beatrix wasn't looking at her before shedding one final tear. This one of regret, for not telling her that she loved her one more time.
