Hello all my FanFiction homies!! Hehe I am SOOOO sorry that it took me so long to update this, but I had to have a little cough-large-cough break. Now I am back and ready for action!! (Not to mention reviews!!) Now, hurry up and read so that I can get some reviews!

Ch. 2: Episode 2: Long-Lost-Lovers Seek Revenge

Jerry Springer music in background.

Announcer: And now, the worst show in the history of television, amazingly in its 13th season, JERRY SPRINGER!!!!!

Crowd: JERRY, JERRY, JERRY, WHOOOOOOO!!!

Jerry Springer: Good Morning, and welcome to Jerry Springer, the only show where you can see a good fight and two naked lesbos in one day!

Crowd: laughs.

Jerry Springer: On today's show, we have long-lost-lovers coming back to seek revenge. Our first guest is a woman by the name of Minerva McGonagall, who was brought here by an anonymous person. Lets bring her on out!

Music in background, while crowd cheers as McGonagall walks out and sits down.

Jerry Springer: Hello Minerva. Do you have any idea why you're here today?

McGonagall: Not the slightest.

Jerry Springer: Are there any past loves that you can remember that might want you back?

McGonagall: Only one, but he would never come back for me. And if he did I would immediately say no.

Jerry Springer: Oh really? Well, here he is!

More Jerry Springer music while crowd cheers. Voldemort walks out, earning a giant gasp from McGonagall. (Incase u hadn't noticed, all the people in the audience are muggles, so they don't know who Voldemort is)

McGonagall: But, but, but-

Voldemort: I have come back to receive my one and only true love.

McGonagall: I told you before, it's over.

Voldemort: But my dear, why not come with me? We could rule the world together.

McGonagall: NEVER! And plus, I am in love with a different man, and have been for 25 years.

Crowd gasps.

Voldemort: Who?!!! Not-

Mcgonagall: Yes, Dumbledore!!

Dumbledore walks out, and the crowd emits many boos.

McGonagall runs to him and starts frenching him like woo.

Voldemort: AAARRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!

Voldemort jumps towards Dumbledore but is stopped by Steve.

Dumbledore: I love her with all my heart, and I'm never letting her go! You deserted her to go become an evil-stinky-poopeyhead-ugly-wannaruletheworld-er!!!

Voldemort: I HATE YOU!!!

Dumbledore: WELL I HATE YOU MORE!!

Both jump towards eahchother and are barely kept from killing eachother by Steve and the rest of the big scary dudes. Once done Voldemort emerges with a bloody nose and Dumbledore with a black eye. Both's clothes are ripped to pieces, and Dumbledore is missing his pants.

McGonagall: Ooo, I like you like that Dumbledore!

Jerry Springer: So, is there nothing between you and Tom anymore?

McGonagall: Nothing. I don't care if I never see him again.

Voldemort starts to cry and runs off stage.

LATER

Person in crowd: I wanna say that Minerva, you picked the right man!!

Crowd "WHOOO's"

Dumbledore smiles and flexes his muscles.

Other person in crowd: I just want some Jerry Beads!!!

Person flashes crowd.

Jerry Springer: Well, thank you very much! Just a little hint of advice to some of our guests: If one partner in a relationship isn't satisfied, let them go! If u don't, it could hurt both of you. Thanks, and I'll see you on tomorrows show!