RAINE'S FIRST DATE

"She's not going." Sirius said, magically drying dishes and sending them to the wrong cupboards. Remus glared at him. "What?" Sirius asked indignantly. "I am her father and if I say she doesn't go, then she-"

"She goes." Remus said, staring straight at his husband. "Because I say she goes."

"Why don't I get to decide what she does?" Sirius pouted, turning toward the refrigerator and pulling a beer out of it.

"Because you get to decide what Morgan and London do. And occasionally Maple." Remus ran his finger along the inside of the mixing bowl and licked the cake mix off his fingers. "I get Juliana and Raine by default."

"But Raine's the only one going out with teenage boys." Sirius protested. "I don't like teenage boys. They're evil."

"Morgan and London go out with teenage boys." Remus said. "Morgan goes out with about ten teenage boys a week. Come here and taste this cake mix. Did I put in enough oil?"

Sirius grudgingly moved toward the counter and sampled the white mix. "Yes, honey. You put in enough oil." He crossed his arms and leaned against the wall. "But Morgan and London are different. They are teenage boys."

"Yes, and Raine's a girl." Remus said, beckoning a cake pan toward him. The batter began to pour itself into the pan. He tsked in his husband's direction. "Sexism, Siri?"

"No." Sirius said. "Fact. Teenage boys should have sex. Teenage girls shouldn't."

Remus rolled his eyes. "And Maple and Juliana don't have sex?"

"They have sex with girls. It isn't the same thing." Sirius protested. "I don't want Raine going out with a boy. He's just going to want her to . . ."

Remus chuckled softly. "Sirius, you're relentless. Raine's going out with Todd tomorrow and that's it. End of discussion."

Sirius narrowed his eyes. "That's not fair."

"No, it's not. But we have about thirty minutes until that cake gets done. Do you want to spend that time fighting or . . ."

Sirius pounced like a puppy dog at the offer.


"Dadd-y!" Raine yelled down the stairs. "Morgan wants me to dress like a slut!" Her brother clamped his hand over her mouth and dragged her bath to the mirror.

"Lipstick and a miniskirt don't constitute as dressing like a slut." Morgan said, digging through his make-up bag for some more purple eye shadow. "Honestly, Ray. You have the best body. If you're not going to show it off, I'll trade you."

"Thanks, but I'll keep my breasts." Raine said as her older brother started to attack her eyelids again. "Daddy! Morgan's trying to get me to switch bodies again!"

Remus appeared in the doorway with a crack. "When are the two of you going to start acting your age? Raine, stop screaming. You'll use your voice before you make it out of the house."

Remus took a tissue from the countertop and licked it, taking Morgan's place. "Morgan, I thought we decided that too much purple eye shadow is a bad thing." He smiled as he wiped at Raine's eyelids.

The boy through his hands in the air, drama queen style. "I'm a visionary. Nobody else understands the future of cosmetics. You're all doomed to die in blue eye shadow and nude lipstick!" He sat down on the edge of the bathtub. "She wanted to wear jeans, Dad." Morgan spoke the word as if it were the most vile of curses. "Nobody wears jeans on a date. Unless they have fat legs. Or they're male."

Remus shook his head and smiled. "You look very pretty, Raine." He smoothed out her hair. "Is a skirt really that bad?"

The fifteen year old narrowed her eyes at her father. "Yes. Skirts are evil. If men see your legs they want to sleep with you."

"Stop listening to your father." Remus said kissing her cheek. "Now, go downstairs and let him look at you." He turned at looked at the youngest son. "Morgan, no more purple eye shadow."

"Dad!"

"She looks better in green."


First I had been London. London was the oldest, followed by Juliana. Then had come Morgan and Maple, twins. Raine had been their little surprise. London was twenty now and Juliana would turn nineteen next month. Morgan and Maple would turn sixteen this year. Raine had celebrated her fifteenth not more than a week ago.

Sirius shook his head. They grew up so fast. Soon he and Remus would have none left. And Sirius was well past the age to be having any more children.

London had brought home his first boyfriend when he was fourteen. Remus forced Sirius to set an 'open door' policy. ("But they're boys. They're going to do it anyway." "Not here, they're not.")

Juliana waited until she was sixteen to bring home a girlfriend. ("Dad, I don't know how to tell you this. I'm gay." Remus raised his eyebrows. "So?")

Morgan brought home his first boyfriend when he was thirteen. ("Daddy, isn't he the cutest?" "I thought you were dating someone named Seth." "That was last week.")

Maple had brought home a girlfriend at fifteen. ("Yeah, I'm gay, too." Sirius laughed. "Really?")

Raine would have her first date tonight, but her 'coming in' happened when she was twelve. ("Daddy, ummm . . . I'm straight." Sirius paused for a minute, then shrugged. "Can't blame you for wanting boys instead of girls, honey." "Sirius!" "What?")


Now, Raine came down the stairs for her first date, dressed in a blue miniskirt and a black tankini. "Daddy, how do I look?" Sirius stood up motionless, then suddenly lurched for the desk drawer. Raine put her hands up in front of her face. "No, Daddy."

Sirius held the camera up to his eye. "Raine, one picture." The girl shook her head. "Raine Rose, put your hands down right now."

The girl lowered her arms slowly. A smile adorned her perfect face. "Who's bright idea was it to name me Raine Rose again?"

"That would be your father." Remus said coming down the stairs. "It's better than Raine Lily." He tweaked his daughter's nose. "He and Lily were pregnant at the same time. What more could you expect?"

Sirius snapped a photograph as the doorbell rang. "That's Todd." Raine said, smoothing out her skirt. "How do I look?"

Sirius blinked. "I forgot to ask . . ."

"Between bitching and moaning." Remus muttered.

"I heard that." Sirius growled. "Is Todd magic or Muggle?"

Raine's eyes widened. "Oops. Umm . . . I'll stall him." She hurried for the door. "Coming!"

Remus yanked out his wand. "Yeah." Sirius said sarcastically. "Get rid of magic with magic. No wonder I love you so."

Remus glared at him. "Can you think of a faster way, your majesty?" He did several banishing and concealing charms and quickly shut the doors to the rest of the house. "Honey?" he asked, trying to sound calm. "Aren't you going to bring your date in?"

Raine entered with a brunette man with a androgynously sculpted face. He stood two inches taller than Sirius and looked to be two years older than London. "Guys? This is Todd Lincoln. Todd, these are my parents: Remus and Sirius." Raine's fathers shook hands with the man who looked to be her date.

"Drink?" Remus asked, trying to cover up for Sirius' dagger eyes. His own weren't doing much better.

"Actually, the show starts in a half hour and we have a twenty minute drive." Todd said. "Right, RayRay?" He kissed the girl's temple. "What time would you like me to have her back by?"

"Eight." Sirius said.

Remus forced a laugh. "Raine doesn't have a curfew. Just make it reasonable." He ground his heel into his husband's foot. "Have fun."

Todd nodded and lead Raine to the door, kissing her cheek and saying something softly that made her laugh. "Will do."


"See?" Sirius said, eyes wide and on fire. "I'm right. I'm always right! She shouldn't have gone out with him. How old is he anyway? Twenty-five?" He paced the kitchen nervously.

Remus forced a smile. "I bet I know someone who knows." He stuck his head out the door and into the hall. "Morgan Black! Come here right now!"

It took about three seconds for the fifteen year old to dash into the kitchen. "What?" the blonde asked. Two sets of eyes glared at him. "I didn't do anything!" Morgan protested. "I swear."

"How old is Todd?" Remus asked, crossing his arms. Morgan whistled softly. "What the hell does that mean?"

Morgan blanched. "I guess you guys met him then."

"No." Sirius said sarcastically. "We're just asking for the fun of it. Yes, we met him."

Morgan nodded. "He'll turn twenty-one next week. I-I think I should g-go clean my . . . umm . . . room. That's it. Room."

"Twenty-one?" Sirius yelled. "He's twenty-one? She's fourteen! How could you let her go out with a guy that's seven years older than her? She's barely old enough to go on dates, let alone go out with a man that's older than London!"

Morgan tried to shrug. "I . . . really can't . . ." his voice trailed off. "I really can't tell her that, Dad."

Remus glared at him. "And why would that be Morgan?"

"It would be hypocritical." Morgan muttered.

"Because . . ."

"Remember Mark?"

"Possibly."

"He was twenty-three."

"What!"


Sirius and Remus sat on the couch side by side, arms crossed and feet on the coffee table. "So Morgan's grounded . . ." Sirius began.

"Indefinitely." Remus said, gritting his teeth. "I can't believe he would date someone who's twenty-three. How can men that age want to go out with . . . with . . . children?"

"They lied." Sirius reminded him, leaning his head on the other man's shoulder. "At least they didn't shag."

Remus rolled his eyes. "Because that makes it better, Sirius."

"It does."

Remus turned and kissed his husband's forehead. "I love you."

"I love you, too."

The two men were asleep when Raine arrived home. The raven-haired girl shook her head and set her purse down, grabbing a blanket off the back of an easy chair. She shook it out and covered her parents up. "Night." she whispered, kissing both of them on the forehead.

"You're grounded." Remus whispered, his eyes opening slowly.

"I know." Raine said, with a slight nod. "But don't yell at me tonight, okay? Daddy's sleeping."