A Series of Unfortunate Substitutes-

samuraiduck27 and PsychoKitty13

A/N- We're baaaaaaaaaaaaaaack…

PK13: You make it sound like that's a bad thing.

SD27: It's a miracle- I'm updating within a reasonable period of time!

PK13: right…13 days is reasonable?

SD27: For me, it is. Ooh- lotsa reviews this time as well!

PK13: And we got some newcomers. Replies are at the bottom, minna.

SD27: Yeah… onward!

DISCLAIMER: SD and PK don't own anything but the characters of the same name and the plot. Depressing, ne?


NOTE: Just FYI- this story will have very irregular updates for the next month or so (as if they weren't already…) because of the fact that SD27 has miraculously made it into the Freshman play and has an insane amount of lines to learn. (50 something, minna!) That and practices, GS meetings, huge amounts of homework and studying for the end-of-year finals will make this fic have slow updates. Gomen- but it aint my fault. Also- it has been decided that this ficcie will have a total of 10, maybe 11 chapters. So, it seems that ASOUS is starting to come to a close… (cries) it should be finished by the time school's out, maybe earlier.

Chapter 7- Who Knew Art Class Could Be So… Violent?

SD and PK trudged their way to Art class- which wasn't so bad. But seeing at it was midday already… and the girls were cursed with the latest lunch hour… so you can see that the lack of food (or in SD's case sugar and caffeine) was making the two a bit slower than usual.

The two entered the room, grabbed their canvases from the large storage rack labeled "Hour 6" and sat down at their respective seats- which were very uncomfortable stools and very far away from each other. Apparently the teacher had enough sense to anticipate the trouble that the two of them, put near each other, with art supplies easily accessible, would cause. Smart cookie, that one was.

The students filed in a few at a time- this was really a laid back class, so there weren't really a lot of problems. The rules were few, don't yell, scream, misbehave, and the like. Otherwise it was pretty free range. They were working on paintings this week- anything you wanted to paint, do so- no points taken off for subject matter, the more creative, the better. The teacher'll be wanting to eat her words soon enough, that's for sure.

The bell rang and PK's favorite white haired bishounen came out of the back room- cleaning off his hands with a rag.

Kuso… this is NOT good… I really don't need to go prying her off of Ryou- not to mention the load of fan girls who'll be out for PK's blood…SD thought frantically, sending a "move and you will regret it, you know that" look toward PK, who was slowly getting out of her seat, and now gave SD a sheepish look before sitting back in her seat and pouting childishly.

"Well, hello everyone." Ryou smiled cheerily.

"Hello." muttered the half dead class- also suffering from lack of energy.

Ryou shrugged it off- understanding completely what was going on. "Alright- you're going to be basically just finishing up your paintings since your teacher isn't here. Odd how so many of them are gone, ne?"

Yeah…real odd. PK thought, focusing on her work- still deciding whether or not getting killed by SD was a big enough risk for glomping the poor British boy.

The look on SD's face that PK noticed she was giving her- apparently SD had an uncanny ability to read PK's mind, or maybe she was just being paranoid- proved otherwise. Messing with SD was not a good thing, and messing with a caffeine withdrawal effected one was just like wearing a sign reading 'dismember me please'.

No- definitely not the best time to get her aggravated.


After a few minutes of watching the class work, or trying not to notice the sideways glances he was receiving from many of the students for various reasons, (adoring from the chicks except for SD and jealously/anger/curiosity -how many albinos are you ever going to see?- from the guys) Ryou decided to go around and see what the students were actually working on.

Nothing really special or out of the ordinary, it seemed. A car, landscapes, flowers, still life… the usual. He went around, smiled his polite little smile at the artist, gave tips, pointers, praise, etc. and ignored the blushes and stares. That is…until he got to a certain raving fangirl's artwork…

PK has been working on her painting for forever. She had started it at home about a month ago and had brought it to school for her project. And now that she had her muse in the same room as her- and coming her way, she noted- she'd finally been able to add the delicate finishing touches the painting required.

Ryou came up behind PK, his usual cheery grin on his face. His eyes widened and grin slipped a fraction or two.. or five… when he took a good look at her artwork.

"D'ya like it?" she asked, eyes hopeful and fangirl instincts demanding she squeeze the life out of the white-haired youth in front of her.

The picture was of a bruised, bloody figure with delicate, white angel wings coming out of his back. They were tipped with blood, and falling apart, white feathers flying around in the frame. The boy gave a pitying look to something outside of the edges of the canvas, and his white hair was streaked with splashes of red as well. But the thing that really creeped out Ryou was the large Millennium Ring carved into his chest in all of its bloody glory.


(A/N: PK really does draw pics like this… I just elaborated a bit and mixed a few of her pieces together. The M.R. thing I saw on this pic PK has as her screensaver.)


Needless to say…Ryou was more than a bit shocked. It was truly an amazing work of art- very detailed, original, and scarily lifelike. But the fact that the figure was almost an exact twin of himself was unnerving.

"It's…very nice! Good detailing, wonderful shading…um, yes." he stuttered, moving on to the next painting.

PK beamed at Ryou's back, not even rendering the effect her painting had had on him. She returned to work, ignoring the numerous glances getting sent her way. Ryou had said barely anything to them, after all.

SD's was the last one Ryou looked at. Originally, he was going to start with her- seeing as she was the closest to the desk- but the way she was stabbing the canvas with her brush and adopting an insane grin and dark laugh reminding one slightly of his Yami… he decided to leave her for last.

He walked up to SD's station, but halted as the otaku's gaze focused on him and changed from the malicious grin to a cheery, warm smile directed at him before back to the grin in a split second and resuming her work in stabbing the canvas.

That can't be good…I've seen 'Kura do that too many times before. he thought, steeling himself for another "PK-ish" painting.

Ryou raised an eyebrow when he saw SD's work. It was… different, to say the least. Not as graphic as PK's, but Ryou found it entertaining. His yami must've been rubbing off on him.

SD's work was of a post-apocalyptic scene, the basic blood red sky, ash and blacked earth all around, large red sun in the sky… city on fire. A group of five girls sat on top of a mound of corpses, weapons in their hands suggesting that they had done the deed and by the looks on their faces, were damn proud of it. Sadistic smiles, evil grins, and smirks all around- except for the one in the middle, who seemed to be laughing her head off.

"Great, ne?" SD sighed, adding some detailing to one of the corpses- not stabbing the canvas for once- that bore an uncanny resemblance to Yami.

Ryou had to admit, like PK, the girl had talent. Taking a closer look- he noticed that one of the five looked exactly like SD- the manically laughing one brandishing a pair of flamethrowers- and one also resembled the girl with the angel painting; she held a bloody dagger and the Millennium Ring shone around her neck. How the two of them knew about the Items was beyond him.

The corpses were detailed as well; some bore resemblances to people he interacted with- Yami, Isis, Marik, and to his slight amusement, Anzu- and a black-haired man with a mask covering the lower half of his face that oddly enough, had a pair on minute glasses perched on them, plus a few other people he didn't know.


(A/N: Plushie of your favorite bishounen- or bishoujo- to whoever can guess the corpse we described! Hint: He's a villain from YYH… and Kurama lovers loathe him immensely. At least… the ones we know do.)


He let out a slight laugh as he viewed the painting. Like most of the people he knew- he thought of Anzu as a dancing-obsessed friendship freak who didn't know when to keep her mouth shut. But, being the polite young man he is, never gave any outward signs of dislike towards the girl.

SD followed his gaze to the deceased Anzu and grinned, "I'm thinking of having her leg cut off… can't dance without a leg, ne? Then again, she's dead…"

The albino looked a little surprised at the suggestion- how did she know so much about Anzu?- but then again, she knew about the Items as well… and the fact that quite a few of the Item holders were in the building, so one of them could have told her. Still didn't explain how well she painted her…

Unless that…that friendship freak is here as well!

Shugging it off, he pulled an empty seat up to SD's easel and gave her tips on finishing up the corpses of Anzu, and surprisingly "that Pharaoh's" as he said.

"'Kura must be rubbing off on ya, eh Ryou?" SD commented, adding some more red to the severed stump of Anzu's leg that was sticking out of the pile.

Ryou looked at her, "You've met him?"

"Hehe… we've met. Great guy, that 'Kura…" she replied, a bit of sarcasm creeping into her words.

"Why do I not like the sound of that?" he sighed, "Add some more here- it's too blood heavy on that side."

"Oh- thanks. And it's probably because we came out of the office unscathed, happy, and got along rather well with your yami?" she told him.

"We?"

"Oh! Me 'n PK, of course." she shrugged, pointing to the girl in the painting, "Speaking of PK…"

SD stood up, went on her tiptoes so she could see above her easel, and glared at an irate, slighting growling PK across the room; who, like the majority of the females in the room, was sending her angry and/or jealous looks.

"Stop growling at me, will ya PK!" she yelled, "It's not like I'm over here Frenching the guy or planning to elope with him or anything! He's just helping me with my Ra-damned painting, that's all! So get over it!"

The class looked at the girl in shock for a minute- can we say anger management, anyone?

"You're not really planning to do that kinda stuff, are ya, Rae?" a guy piped up.

SD turned to him, voice dripping with sarcasm and annoyance, "No. Actually, we're really figuring out when the best time to go sneak out of here and find the nearest broom closet would be."

She then dumped a can of orange paint on the boy's head, "Of course not, you dolt! Ugh- I don't even like him that way!" she added a splash of green to the human canvas, "And my name's SD, damn it!"

After once again recovering from a good amount of shock- SD plus no caffeine equals easily pissed off vertically challenged 15 year old, after all- the class started laughing hysterically at the poor guy.

The one time I get a class with a girl who doesn't have an interest in me and she turns out to be a psycho… lovely. Ryou thought, sighing and giving SD a weak smile as she returned to her station.

PK was laughing as hard as the others, but went back into a sullen mood as SD walked back to her painting and gave a satisfied smirk to Ryou, who returned it with a smile. SD noticed and rolled her eyes; PK could be so stubborn sometimes. Geez- she was acting as if she was his girlfriend or something! PK, not SD, that is…

"PK…" she sighed, coming over and smirking at her painting before returning to talking to her, "Geez- nothing to get upset over. I don't like the guy- you know that. He's too…goody-goody for my tastes."

"What's wrong with being a goody-goody?" PK asked, still a little bitter, plus there was the fact that she was a goody-goody herself.

"Nothing- it's just… they're not my type. Ryou's not my type."

"Better a goody-goody than an icy bastard." muttered PK, taking offence from SD's comments and earlier things.

"What's that supposed to mean?" SD countered, anger building.

(A/N: Fight! Fight! Fight!)

"Nothing." she said innocently.

"I don't think that was nothing, you baka." the blonde replied icily, eyes narrowing.

"Ahou." PK said, sticking her tongue out.

SD clenched her fists, "Teme!"

PK threw down her palette and brush- glaring down the few inches difference between the two, "Stupid blonde midget!"

Now, for those of you who don't know- never, by any means, call SD a midget. Or stupid. She will go psycho on you. She doesn't even like hearing the word- or saying it. She refers to it as "The 'M' Word".


"You didn't just say that… you… you…" SD stuttered before grabbing the palette from the ground and throwing it in PK's face. A mix of black, red, and white paint was covering PK's face- making her look like a clown.

(A/N: No! Not the clowns! Evvvvvvvvvvvvvvil, that they are…)

PK wiped the paint off her face- a look of anger masking the one of surprise as she took a thing of pink paint and hurled it at the girl- only for SD's eyes to widen and duck as it was thrown; it only caught the side of her head instead of getting all over her clothes and face. But it was pink… and as everyone knows, pink is the color of evil. And SD hates pink.

Soon the two were in the middle of the ring of easels, kicking and hitting each other, pulling on their hair and calling out random insults.

"Fight! Fight! Fight!"

"Jerry, Jerry, Jerry…"

"Kick her ass, PK!"

"Go Rae! …I mean SD!"

The class was really getting into it- supplying the two with bottles of paint, glue, brushes… it was rather exciting after all. Ryou was trying to get the two to stop, but of course- he wasn't heard or was ignored. When it was really starting to get out of hand… i.e.- bloody lips and stinging slaps… Ryou turned to his last resort.


/Yami…I need some help here/

# Huh? Oh- what is it now, Hikari? #

/Can you break up a fight here for me- it's getting out of hand./

# Why would I do that?#

/It's not one you'd enjoy- just two girls beating the crap out of each other and flinging paint around./

#Sounds amusing to me… girls whaling on each other you say? That's odd…#

/The girls were odd to begin with. You'd probably like them, though. A sadist who has a strong dislike for the Pharaoh and Anzu- and one who's the same way…but happens to be a fan girl of mine./

#… they wouldn't happen to have dyed hair and call each other by odd two-letter names would they?#

/SD and PK… you've met, I assume./

# Yeah- helped me out nicely. Guess I'll help you; those two can kill each other yet, I have another prank I want to play on the Pharaoh.#


Ryou sighed and Bakura took over his hikari's body for a moment.

"EVERYONE SHUT UP AND STOP WHATEVER THE HELL YOU'RE DOING!" he yelled.

" 'Kura! Hey!" PK greeted, pausing in the fighting.

"Yeah…hey." added SD, nursing a bruise on her head.

"What in Ra's name are you two bakas doing?" he inquired.

"Nuthin… We're just…"

SD got cut off as the bell rang. Everyone shrugged, put their materials away and headed out the door. SD and PK talking and laughing with each other as if nothing had ever happened.

"Ooh- that looked like it hurt. Gomen, PK."

"No prob- that actually was kind of fun. You got paint on your cheek."

"And you have some all over your pants."

"So do you- lucky for us we left our coats in our lockers."

"I'd kill you if anything got on my precious coat."

"Ditto, SD, ditto."

Ryou regained control over his body and blinked.

He groaned, "I swear, I'll never understand women…especially ones with mental problems like them."


A/N: w00t! Another chappie done! (does a little happy-dance)

PK13: …yeah. But Ryou was scared of me!

SD27: You'll get over it. Here you go- (gives Ryou plushie to PK)

PK13: (runs off Ra knows where)

SD27: Okay- time for reviews! Wow- we have 13? Go us!


Reviewer Replies:

AmnarRanma- (laughs hysterically) love those ideas… mind if I borrow them? No, we didn't get in trouble over a prank… it was the fact my grades were beginning to slip a bit and the fact that me and PK are… easily distracted. Thanks for the review! Hope you liked this!

Nytingale- Thanks for the review- glad you loved the fight between Marik and Malik! I'd bet on Malik… and hopefully not lose cause I gots no money to back it up with. How 'bout you , PK?

PK13: (still distracted by Ryou plushie)

…never mind.

ComputerFreak101- Hiei? Where! (looks around frantically) hope he doesn't find me either… thanks so much for your review! Glad you loved it- and see! Only 13 days this time- not 26! lol. Glad you reposted Japanese Idol… love that fic!

Jasmine Reinier- Thanks for reviewing! I don't think we'll ever find that flamer… but if we do, I'll make sure to leave a piece of him for you to slice up, k? I decided that your Wolfie-chan'll make a slight appearance next chappie, so you'll have to hold on a bit longer. Glad you loved this- hope this one was just as good!

Mew Koshou- Thanks for reviewing! But… if anyone gets the M. Rod, it'll be me. lol. Hope you liked this one as well!

TiNaBoBiNa17- (whacks you over head) STOP IT WITH THE DAMN LOVERLY THING! ARGH! Hehe… anger management, I know. Love ya, Lilz- so don't hurt me.

PK13: Go ahead! Hurt her! I wanna see some blood!

SD27: (glares) Hey PK… look! It's Ryou! In leather!

PK13: (rushes off without realizing it's a distraction)

Sorry you got your computer and stuff taken from you. That really sucks. (gives hug) Hope you liked this chapter, mi amiga.

Baka Basher- Thanks for your review! And next chapter, both the RK and the IY people should be showing up, so you'll have to hang tight for a few more weeks or so. Hoped you liked this one!

GreenEyedFloozy- OMG… we love your quote! Gomen… but we have officially stolen it and now use it on a regular basis. Rights go to you though if people ask where we got it! Don't feel guilty for not reviewing… I'm the one should be guilty for not updating.

PK13: Not my fault…I don't type up this stuff.

SD27: Yeah… that's my job since you type too slow. Hope you liked this one as well! Thanks for reviewing!

Supper Sailor Darkness- Thanks for your review! And yes… Gravitation is a good series. Shonen-ai/ yaoi though, so if you don't like that stuff I'd advise you to stay away from it. You can help us destroy all schools! We need all the help we can get! But you can't have the Rod… that's mine, ya hear! Once I figure out how to get it away from those psycho Ishtars…

Alexa Midori McClintock-Kaiba- …you went to Japan? Lucky! I wanna go! Hope you had fun! (uses flamethrower on anime choir) I hate that song… so Ra-damned annoying. Lol- sounds like your science class is very entertaining as well. Thanks much for reviewing!

XxMidnightRosesxX- Thanks for reviewing! Ugh… memory lapses. That sucks. I hate it when that happens. Hope you liked this one!

Orlandie- Thanks for the reviews! So glad you liked this! Yes… Emerick is like that. (mumbles various things about the SOB) hehe… yeah! SD's just like one of your bff's? Odd… scarily odd. She's a reviewer too? (looks around suspiciously) That's only a coincidence, I swear! LOL. Hope you liked this one!


SD27: Weeeeeeeeeeeeell… looks like another chapter has come to an end.

PK13: Hey SD- I still haven't found Ryou. Where'd he go?

SD27: (smacks head) baka neko…

PK13: (glares) what the hell is that supposed to mean?

SD27: hehe… bye now. (runs off)

PK13: That…that… ugh! Anyways… please read and review, we'd appreciate it much.

Jore ai, minna!

PsychoKitty13 and samuraiduck27