A/N: Thanks VERY much for all your messages. Makes me feel better to know that I'm not alone in my grief. Yes, I will continue this fic, for the time being anyway.  I'll do it for Sirius…and all who love Sirius, including myself. But I'm still in denial, as I've not been to bring myself to start reading Book 5. Hope that reading it will not make me so depressed that I won't want to have anything to do with the Harry Potter series ever again.  It's painful to write about him and remember that he has been MURDERED by my favourite author (may be EX-favourite, once I'm done with the book), but I realised that writing this fic does make me feel a little better because I can still, in a way, desperately hold on to the character.  Thanks again.  This chapter is for Sirius and all who are miserably nursing the wound inflicted by JKR.

Old Wounds Still Hurt

April, Harry, Ron and Hermione gathered around the table in Hagrid's hut.  Moments ago, April had repeated exactly what Dumbledore explained to Sirius and Remus about the plan.  The three friends had listened attentively, and allowed April to speak without any interruption.

"Professor Flamel, can I ask you a question?"  Hermione said finally.

"Sure, Hermione.  But please call me April.  I don't quite used to this 'professor' title."

"What makes you decide to help Sirius?  This will put yourself in danger!"

April considered her question for a while, and said, "I'm doing this for a number of reasons, Hermione.  Some of them are personal ones. But most of all, I'm doing this because it is right." 

*

April soon realised that she had chosen a bad time to visit Remus Lupin's house.  Remus was away and Sirius was obviously not too pleased to see her.

"Why in the world did you put the itch powder on my bed?" Sirius growled.  Those were his greeting words.

She decided to grin and bear with it.  Hopefully, he would see the humour in her little prank and all would be forgiven.  "It's just tit-for-tat, Sirius.  I'm just returning the 'favour' you gave me many years ago,"

"Years ago? I don't remember doing anything to deserve this.  We've not even met then!"

"That was ages ago.  Almost sixteen years in fact.  I'm sorry…women just have the longest memory, you know."

"We've met sixteen years ago? This is ridiculous!" said Sirius.

"We did.  At the wedding of James Potter and Lily Evans.  I remember that you were the best man."

"You were there? You know James and Lily?"

"My Mum knows Mrs Evans, so she was invited.  Dad couldn't make it, so I accompanied my Mum instead," April explained.  "You really don't remember what you did?"

Sirius shook his head.

"Let me give you a hint.  You did something to the bride's hand bouquet."

Sirius frowned in concentration for a few moments.  Then his eyes lit up and he exclaimed, "Yes! I remember now.  I think I put some itch powder on the flowers."

He added sheepishly, "I've always thought it's a stupid tradition to have the bride throw her bouquet and for the Muggles to believe that the woman who catches it will be the next to get married.  So I decided to add a little something to the bouquet to make the occasion…hmm…more memorable for the lucky person."

"And the lucky one happened to be me!" April said in an accusing voice.

"You were…what, eight? Why in the world would you want to catch the bouquet? Trying to make all the other women old spinsters?"

April was seeing red. "The bouquet hit my Mum. And she was so embarrassed that she shoved it to me. I ended up with itch and rashes for the next few weeks!"

He tried to stifle a laugh.  "Now that you've mentioned it, I vaguely recall seeing a kid holding the bouquet.  How old were you then?"

"I was nine," April said. "Like I told you, Mr Black, women do have better memories."

Sirius chuckled.  Memories of James and Lily's wedding came rushing back to him.  He remembered how happy James was, and how excited he himself was that day.  He also remembered that Remus had to hold on to the pair of wedding rings just in case Sirius lost them in his nervousness, and that Peter…

Sirius turned away from April and faced the window.  His shoulders were shaking.

Great, April thought, rolling her eyes. He's now shaking with laughter.  I must look really stupid then.

But as she stepped closer, she realised that something was not quite right.

"Sirius? Are you alright?" she asked as she stepped toward Sirius.

"Go away! Leave me alone!"

She was unprepared for his outburst and was too startled to react.

After several tense moments passed, April slowly approached Sirius' back again.  He flinched as she laid a hand on his left shoulder.

"I said get away from me!" Sirius turned around, grabbed her shoulders, and threw her against the wall.

April cried out in shock and pain.  Her back had made contact with the hard wall and she felt a shot of pain down her spine.

He was standing before her, looking both lost and remorseful when he realised what he had done.  Then, in a spilt second, the hardness returned to his face.

"What do you know? Go away. I suck. I've killed my best friend and now I can't even fulfil my promise to him by taking care of Harry. I'm a failure. A jinx," Sirius said miserably.

"No, it's all not your fault! You did not kill James Potter.  It was Peter Pettigrew.  And you have not been able to take care of Harry simply because you were wrongly accused.  It's not your fault!  It's never your fault, Sirius!  You did the best you could!"  She took on a more cheerful voice and added, "You'll soon be able to take care of Harry."

But Sirius refused to be comforted.  "You don't understand.  No one can understand.  I don't want to talk about this anymore. Go away.  Get lost! Leave me alone!" There was rising anger in his voice.

April snapped. "What makes you think I don't understand? What makes you think you're the only one who has the right to be miserable?"

Tears flooded her eyes and threatened to spill over. "I may not know the guilt you have been living with all these years.  But I do know what it's like to lose everything I knew…everything I had."

She added bitterly, "You still have Harry, Sirius. I have no one.  I've lost my entire family overnight."

Sirius turned pale.  "What happened?" he asked in a quiet voice.

"I used to have a huge family. Many generations living together, training together. I thought I was lucky," April smiled miserably at memories of her past. "Then three years ago, my world came crumbling down.  Nicolas decided to destroy the Stone so that Voldemort will never gain immortality.  But it was never as simple as getting rid of a stone.  It was putting an end to the lives of many Flamels."

She began to speak faster and faster, as though there was an urgent need to purge the memories.  "It was the Flamel tradition to use the Sorcerer's Stone to grant immortality to the all descendants when they turn twenty-five.  It was a mark that they have become full-fledged wizards and ready to leave the Flamel Fortress.  But once the Stone was destroyed, everyone who had used it will not be able to go on for more than three weeks.  Within three weeks, Sirius…just three weeks, my family of more than thirty left me. I watched every single one of them go…right before my eyes."  April closed her eyes, wishing desperately that the pain would go away.

Sirius was at a lost for words.  He had always thought April Flamel to be a person without many worries.  She had seemed so happy and contented with life that he almost resented her for it.  No one has the right to be this happy! This thought had crossed his mind whenever he thought of her.  Now he knew better.  This woman knew pain.

"You are the only survivor?" he asked.

"No. My brother and I…we were the only ones who had not come of age to undergo the Flamel tradition."

Sirius felt more hopeful.  So this woman was not in such a desperate situation afterall!  "You have a brother?  Where is he now?  We've never heard Dumbledore or yourself mention him."

"He's at St Mungo's," April's voice was close to breaking. "Aaron was looking forward to the immortality and wealth promised by the Sorcerer's Stone. The destruction of the Stone and the loss of our family were big a blow for him."

"So you're the only one now."  It was more a statement than a question, and there was sympathy in Sirius' voice.

"Sort of. Albus is the closest person I have to a family. He frequently writes to me, and visits me whenever he can.  There's partly why I'm here.  I owe this to Albus.  I know he needs my help and I'll not let him down."

Sirius looked at this woman standing before him for several long moments. Then he stepped towards her and gently drew her into his arms.

They stood together for a long time.  Each had a shoulder soaked with the other person's tears.

***

Hope this is not too depressing.  I can't write anything too cheerful right now.  The next chapter should (hopefully) be more fun.