1.
He loved her. That is something he can hold on to through hurricanes; even standing in the midst of rubble and shattered lives, he can say with absolute certainty that he loved her. They were young and scared, a baby on the way, but love had never been the question. And he never thought it would be.
But storms rip through towns and towers fall and twenty year marriages come apart at the seams. A thousand maybes echo through his mind like thunder. A repetitious chorus with an erratic conductor, and nobody knew the music. He held his fingers against the inside of his wrist one night, just to see if it was holding steady. Heartbeat after heartbeat.
2.
He's always hated psychiatrists; he hated people digging around in his mind like he was some sort of an interesting case study. Subject appears to be under extreme stress, to have anger issues, to have marital problems. But a cop? Maybe that was a little different. Maybe someone like that could actually be useful to an investigation. And yes, maybe he was a little attracted to her, but more likely it was the cold rush of realizing that he was nearly single again, and nearly able to notice these things. He swallowed his ice water and felt the chill spread.
3.
She had a crush on him. Strange to call it that, as the word brought up memories of schoolgirls and whispers and notes passed under desks, but that's what he was told. He didn't know if it were true, and he didn't know what he'd do if it were. She was pretty, there was no denying that, but then her predecessor had been as well. And he's always been a little wary of lawyers.
4.
Somewhere in the middle of falling apart, he'd fallen for her. Beautiful and wounded. A fragile superhero. She had been the strength that held him together; she had forced him to keep walking. But when he presses his lips to hers one late night, walking her to her apartment, he doesn't know if either of them are strong enough to walk away from this. And the world tilts on its axis; everything is falling out of their control.
(the end)
