Secrets And Surprises
Remus found April at the top of the Astronomy Tower. She was sitting on a chair, staring up at the sky with her bare eyes, ignoring the telescope in front of her.
"I would have thought you'll be celebrating with the rest," he said.
April turned around sharply, a little startled at Remus' presence. "I didn't hear you," she smiled.
He drew a chair next to her and settled down. "What are you doing here?"
"Thinking."
"About?"
"Thinking about how my life has changed." She was clearly in a reflective mood. "I'm glad I came to Hogwarts. Meeting all of you has turned my life around."
"What was it like? Before you came?"
"Sirius Black and Remus Lupin are my first friends."
That was certainly not what Remus expected to hear.
"The Flamels were recluses. We hardly had any contact with the outside world, save for the occasional visits by family friends like Albus and short trips outside the Flamel Fortress which were hard to come by," April was rambling, as though she was in a desperate need to be heard. "The more I heard about the outside world from our guests, the more I wanted to get out. I felt like a prisoner and the only thing worth looking forward to was the occasional trips outside. But it was a vicious cycle. The more I saw of the colourful world, the more restless and discontented I became."
She took a deep breath, stole a glance at Remus who was listening patiently, and continued, "I was at the wedding of James Potter and Lily Evans. I begged Albus and my parents for a long time before they agreed to let me attend. I can still remember the laughter, the happiness that filled the air. I followed behind Albus, stuck close to him and observed. Everyone looked as though they belonged together. I was envious. I was jealous. I did not want to go back to my prison."
"It couldn't have been that bad. I would imagine your family was very close-knitted," Remus commented softly.
"With all the time we spend under the same roof, we ought to be that way," April smiled bitterly. "But I hardly see any of them other than my parents and brother. All of us have our own part of the Fortress and we usually keep to it. Everyone is behind closed doors. That's what happens when you gain immortality. There will come a time when there's nothing that can interest you anymore, and there are few things to look forward to. It's like going on a long tiring walk and knowing it'll never end."
"How did you feel when the Sorceror's Stone was destroyed?"
"I had mixed feelings. Sadness, a sense of loss and helplessness. Everything I had known had suddenly changed. I was suddenly alone and free to do whatever I wanted. It was scary, but in a perverse way, it was liberating for me. It meant freedom. I actually felt relieved. Then, all I felt was guilt. Guilt that came with the knowledge that the destruction of the Stone brought them death but brought me life. I hated myself for feeling that way and in the first year after their deaths, I did not permit myself to step out of the Fortress. I deliberately made myself unhappy so that I'll not feel the guilt. Then Albus came. He made me see how wrong I was. He taught me to live my own life."
"Were you close to your parents and brother?"
"My parents doted on me. I was close to my brother when we were much younger. As we grew older, we drifted apart. He was obsessed with wealth, fame and immortality. I made the mistake of confiding in him that I wanted to leave the Fortress and he labeled me a traitor for harbouring such thoughts."
"I never had the chance to get to know anyone long enough, or meet them often enough to establish a friendship. Sirius and you are my first friends," she managed a weak smile. "I'm finally leading the life I've always dreamt of. I'm now surrounded by friends and I'm free."
Both Remus and April fell silent for a long time, each lost in thoughts.
"Thanks, Remus," she broke the silence. "Sorry to put you through my ranting. I've never told anyone all these before. Not even Albus."
Remus shook his head. "I don't mind. Not at all," he said simply. "I'm glad you trust me enough to confide in me."
"Somehow I feel that you'll understand. You're a trustworthy and dependable friend, Remus."
Remus remembered how he was tempted to betray Sirius' trust and shuddered. "Do you intend to tell Sirius?" he asked quietly.
"No. Not yet. I'll tell him someday. Or perhaps I never will."
"Why's that?"
"Sirius has enough bad memories of his own to last him a lifetime. I don't want him to worry about me. I'd like him to regard April Flamel as a cheerful girl with few cares in this world. What's past has passed. There's no need to burden him with it."
Remus nodded. "There's still the future to look forward to," he smiled and added teasingly, "And I would have thought you'll join in the celebration to bond with your future godson."
"Godson?" her eyes widened. "You mean Harry?"
"Sure, who else?"
"I've never thought about it. I can't picture being the godmother of anyone, much less someone who's only ten years younger than me."
Remus lifted his brows in surprise. "You're sort of going out with Sirius now. It's only a matter of time -"
"I don't want to think so far ahead, Remus," she interjected. "I can make plans for the next few days, few weeks or even the next few months. But nothing longer than that. I care a lot about Sirius and he's everything to me now. But no one knows what will happen in the future."
"If you don't plan, you don't anticipate and you'll not be let down?"
She nodded, "You understand me well. I just want to enjoy the present. I cannot allow myself to hope by making plans for the future. In this way, if things don't turn out right, there'll be lesser disappointment."
"Sirius will not hurt you. You can trust him."
"I trust Sirius. But I'm scared, Remus. The more I grow attached to him, the more I'm afraid to lose him."
"You're not going to lose him," Remus tried to reassure her.
"I've been having nightmares for as long as I can remember. Most of them are replays of what happened four years ago. But sometimes, it's Sirius. I'd see things happen to him and I can't do anything to stop them." There was a haunted look on April's face, and she was trembling slightly. "I'll see it happen over and over again. I'll see Sirius surrounded by dementors who close in on him and lower their hoods. And I'll see Voldemort casting the Avada Kedavra curse and watch Sirius fall to the ground. Over and over again." Tears were brimming in her eyes, threatening to spill over.
We're fighting a war, April. In every war, there will be casualties. Remus kept these thoughts to himself. He didn't need to articulate them. April knew that there was nothing they could do to avoid the impending war between the Dark and the Light. All they could do was to defend themselves and everyone close to their hearts, to the best of their abilities.
*
Harry watched the chameleon on Hermione's desk and sighed as he returned his attention to the task he had at hand. The earthworm in front of him showed no resemblance to what it was supposed to be transformed into. He uttered the incarnation that, once again, had no effect on the worm.
Harry was about to seek Hermione's help when there was a loud rap on the classroom door. The fifth-year Gryffindors turned curiously as Professor McGonagall yanked it open with some irritation. Harry could see his godfather's head towering above his Transfiguration professor's, and observed the two adults closely. They seemed to be in some form of argument which Sirius must have won since the Deputy Headmistress turned to her students and said in a loud voice, "Mr Potter, Professor Black needs to speak to you for a minute." She turned back to Sirius as she added, "And only a minute."
Harry made his way quickly to Sirius, eager to find out more.
"How are you doing, Harry?" Sirius asked distractedly.
"Terrible. I'm trying in vain to turn an earthworm into a chameleon."
"Just pay attention to the way you flick your wand," the older man replied dismissively.
Harry knew Sirius must have a reason for interrupting his class. "Is there something you need to tell me?"
Sirius licked his lips. "I need the Marauders' Map right now."
"It's in my trunk," Harry responded, and hastily added as his godfather turned to leave, "The password is Poppypins."
Sirius threw him a grateful smile over his shoulder as he tore into the direction of the Gryffindor Tower.
*
Sirius saw April in the corridor, next to the moving tapestry of Barnabas the Barmy.
"Thank Merlin you're here!" He grabbed the young woman from behind and enveloped her into a fierce hug.
April pulled away and stared at Sirius quizzically.
"I couldn't find you. Thought for a moment you've left." He grinned happily at her. "Fortunately I have the map."
"Map? What map?" she asked him blankly.
"Nevermind about that. Come with me!" He took her hand and guided her down many flights of moving staircases, till they stopped in front of classroom eleven, an unused room.
"Sirius, what are you up to? If we need to talk, we can do it anywhere. Do you really have to bring me from the seventh floor to the ground floor for this?"
Sirius put on his wounded puppy look. "Give me a chance. Do I look that dumb?"
April bit her lower lip. "Sorry. I'm a little edgy." She took a deep breath to clear her mind. "Are things alright between you and Harry?"
He nodded. "I think so. We had a good time last night. Pity you didn't want to join us."
April felt a surge of resentment again. "You don't need someone to tag along each time you spend time with your godson." She knew the words came out all wrong as soon as she uttered them. She looked away guiltily, not trusting herself to speak again.
"Things are fine between Harry and I. But are things alright between you and I?" Sirius asked quietly.
"Sure."
"But you're still thinking of leaving?"
"I'll only be away for a few days. I told you that you can –"
"I can spend time with my Harry while you spend time with those favourite guys of yours?" His mouth curved upwards, as a fresh thought occurred to him. "You're not jealous of my godson, are you?"
"Of course not!" she retorted hotly.
"He was jealous of you. Or at least I think he was."
She looked alarmed.
"But Harry is a sensible boy. He knows his godfather can't help being besotted by a certain fair maiden. It's a shame she prefers her house elves to –"
"You're talking nonsense again!" April broke into a smile.
"So don't go," Sirius tried to turn on all his charm.
"You're fast becoming an over-possessive boyfriend."
"Becoming? I thought I already am one," Sirius laughed before adding abruptly, "let's make a deal."
"It depends on what sort of deal you have in mind."
"If I can bring your house elves to you, you'll stay put at Hogwarts?"
"Am I a prisoner now?" she chuckled softly. "So I can't even venture out of this school?"
"Sure you can," he shrugged. "As long as you're accompanied by the handsome Professor Black."
"The shameless professor, you mean. I've never come across anyone who calls himself handsome. What have I done to deserve a warden such as yourself?"
"I told you I'll never let you out of my sight again. If you prefer, you can pretend I'm a house elf tagging along instead of some warden."
"That sounds delightful! But I'm not giving you clothes ever."
"That's fine by me," he grinned. "So do we have a deal?"
"Yes," she giggled. "Only if you can get Brandy and Whiskey to appear in five seconds."
"Five seconds? That's barely enough time to disapparate to the Flamel Fortress!"
"That's the deal," she replied mischievously.
Sirius gave a sigh of resignation and kicked the door to classroom eleven open.
Two small figures rushed towards April and attempted to throw themselves on her. She was knocked off her feet and could only stare open-mouthed at the two newcomers.
peachgirl1608: I'll take my break next week! :)
Ms. Padfoot: Sirius' hair is longer than before, but as to how long it is now, I'll leave it to your imagination. ;) There'll be another chapter on Sirius and Harry, but it'll not take place so soon.
Blueberrie & Jena Jinn & phoebe666: Sorry for taking so long to churn out this chapter :P
OutofAzkaban: I thought ICSY is faster-paced than this story!
Fire'N'Ice: The celebration was fun but I wasn't there to witness it so I can't write about it ;)
ANNE( v )79: Kill all the people? Hmm…that's good. If I kill off one character every chapter, I can easily write more than ten more chapters! *evil grin*
star-prancer: You had the same thought about Harry? That's really weird! Perhaps we're both telepathic! :)
moe: Snape's punishment will take place two to four chapters later. But I'm not going to do anything drastic like kill him, hex him, or force him to take a bath ;)
Senshichan14: I love your idea about Sirius going nuts when Harry dates. I may just use that!
Star06: You must really miss Umbridge to want her back in this fic. Or perhaps it's just a strong dislike for Snape! LOL
Ashley: Thanks for reviewing! I've visited the website you recommended but it seemed a little quiet. I'll visit the site again next week and decide if I'll join, ok?
Katani Petitedra: What's 'kyyot'? *looks sheepish* Please enlighten me! :)
nunnya buiznes: I'm the first to get a signed review?! Yippee!!!
SjabRox: Oops, my muse decided to have more of the two elves only in the next chapter…
Diosa Alexia: I don't like the angry and whiny Harry in Book Five, so I'll not make him like that in my fic. And of cuz, it's hard to stay angry with someone as cute as Sirius!
black-cat-on-the-wall: I can't say who's marrying who and who's not marrying who! That'll spoil the fun! Good try, though ;)
tenniStar514: Yes, I know that I'm on your fav lists. Thanks, thanks, thanks!!! *gives tenniStar514 a big hug*
Lil Lupin: Thanks. Actually, you were the one who reminded me to write about Harry!
LILRKCHK: I've read your review of ICSY. Is that the first time you're reading that fic? Glad you like it! The Gryffindor Quidditch match may not take place so soon, but I'll see if I can write about a practice session first :)
lizziepooh29: Sirius deserves to be happy, so I'll not let his godson stay angry with him for long. Yes, I'm a biased writer! LOL
Lily Skylo: Your wishes came true – Sirius went for the party and April did not leave before he talked to her :)
