A/N: I'm back!!!!! In case you can't remember the latest in this fic, here's a refresher: the dementors are finally destroyed and now Sirius can finally propose…ARGH!!!
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The Proposal
April gasped softly as a battered door appeared out of nowhere, between numbers eleven and thirteen Grimmauld Place. She watched as Sirius tapped at the door which creaked open slowly.
"Come on," he said in a quiet voice as he took her hand and pulled her across the threshold after him.
A strong musky smell filled her nostrils, and her suspicions were confirmed as light began to fill the hall at a wave of Sirius' wand. The place looked worn, as though it had not been lived in for decades. In spite of the thick layer of dust that was everywhere, it was unmistakable from the furniture and décor that the place was once owned by affluent wizards. Dark and affluent wizards, she silently corrected herself, noting the motifs of serpents that decorated the room.
April gave an involuntary shudder. "What's this place? Why have you brought me here?"
Sirius regarded her grimly. "I promised to show you what makes me tick. We might as well start from here."
She shook her head, confused. "I still don't get it."
"This is where I grew up, April."
Her head jerked up in surprise. This was not a place she would associate Sirius with. She recalled her earliest memory of him in her mind – the laughing young man at the Potters' wedding. No matter how hard she tried, she could not picture the young Sirius in a place like this.
"Does this turn you off?" he asked, peering into her face.
"I'm surprised, that's all," she assured him quickly, before adding in a small voice, "I can't imagine you fitting in here at all."
"You're quite right." He ran a hand roughly through his hair. "I didn't fit in. I hated this place. Still do."
She waited for him to continue.
"This belongs to me now, since I'm the last surviving Black." He gave a bitter laugh. "Ironic, isn't it? I'm the one who hated this monster, and yet I'm the one who gets to inherit it!"
"Sirius –"
"I ran away at the age of sixteen. I couldn't stand being here any longer. I hated this place and everyone who lived in it."
"You've not stepped in here since?"
"Once, just once. My parents hurled me back once, and I was gone again the moment their backs were turned."
"They didn't –"
"They knew better than to try again." He shrugged in an attempt to make light of the issue. "They decided to blast me off from the family tree instead."
"That must have been horrible! How could –" She stopped abruptly as her gaze fell on the wall behind him. Was it…? She took a few steps closer and let out a chilling scream.
Sirius was with her in an instant, pulling her into his arms and blocking her from the sight that had caused her alarm. He had forgotten about the row of shrunken heads of house-elves that were mounted on the wall.
"My, my. The shame of my flesh has finally decided to pay us a visit!"
The couple twirled around. The moth-eaten velvet curtains April had barely noticed earlier drew open to reveal a life-sized portrait of an old woman dressed in black.
The woman in the portrait eyed April with disdain. "Who are you?" she demanded in a manner that could only be described as both haughty and hostile.
"I – I'm April. April Flamel."
"Flamel? A pure-blood, no less!" The old woman gave a laugh that sounded so horrible that April had to master all her willpower not to cover her hands over her ears. "The blood traitor has finally realised his stupidity?"
"Shut up, you old hag!" Sirius shouted at the portrait. April could feel his whole body grow rigid with anger.
"You'll pay for your folly! It's too late to –"
Before she could say more, Sirius had stunned the portrait and pulled the heavy curtains over it.
April took a tentative step towards him. "Sirius…"
"You've just met my mother."
"Huh?"
"I said, you've just met my mother!" he repeated in a harsh voice.
"She - I had no idea…"
He waved his hands in the air vaguely, as he took some paces to calm himself down. "I'm sorry you have to meet her," he said in a more gentle voice.
"That's fine," she mumbled, not sure of what else to say. "Can we leave now?"
Sirius gestured toward the stairs. "You don't want to see the rest of the house?"
"I think I've seen enough," she replied quietly.
"Does this make you…"
"What?"
"Feel…erm…disgusted at being associated with me?"
"That's crazy! Why would I?"
He shook his head at himself. "I'm not doing this right. I'm messing this all up!"
"Sirius?"
"Actually, there is a reason why I've brought you here. There's something I want to ask you. No! Don't interrupt please…I don't want to lose my nerve, not now!" He held out a hand to silence her. "I've been looking at houses for months. It was meant to be a surprise. But I've yet to find anywhere suitable. My plan was to find that ideal house, before…doing this. But I've not been having much luck in that area and I can't wait any longer."
This seemed to be leading to the conversation she had been dreading, She stared hard at the front of his cloak. Was that a speck of dust or a trick under the light?
Sirius clasped her hands and held them against his chest, leaving her no choice but to look him in the eye.
"You're not asking me any questions? Don't you want to know why I was frantically looking for a house?" he asked.
She gave him a blank look. I must really be a skilled actress, she thought, as she silently urged him not to continue.
But she had no such luck as he apparently decided to supply his own answer. "I wanted to find the perfect house because I want to start my own family."
"With Harry," she deliberately misunderstood him.
"With Harry, of course. I promised the boy to give him a home, and it's high time he gets to live a decent family life. But that's not all I have in mind." He tightened his grip on her hands. "I've some living to do myself. I want someone to share the rest of my life with. She'd be the mistress of my home."
"Sirius –" She tried to pull her hands away but his hold was unyielding.
"I meant to bring you to that perfect house and then make you an offer you can't resist." He grinned impishly. "But I'm not a patient man, and I decided to take Plan B." He threw his gaze about the hall. "I'm showing you this place instead because it was part of me. Much as I hated it, I grew up here. I promised you sometime back to let you understand more about me. So here's it. This was the family I left behind…one I wished I never had…one filled with Muggle-haters and dark wizards."
"You were never one of them, Sirius. You're one of the strongest supporter of the Light," she said soothingly. She had momentarily forgotten about her fear when she saw the pain and bitterness in his eyes.
She was soon rewarded by a smile. He released her hands and enveloped her into a fierce hug. "Don't you worry. Our home will not resemble this place in the slightest bit."
She suddenly stiffened and pulled away.
"Baby, what's wrong?" Confused, he took a step towards her, only to have her back away. Dread shone through her eyes. "April?"
"Let's go back, Sirius. I want to get out of here." Her voice was tight.
"It's this horrid place, isn't it?" he asked grimly. "You hate it here as much as I –"
"No!"
"April, listen to me!" In one long stride, he had reached her and pulled her back into his arms. "Both of us had spent too many years in cold unfeeling places. It's time to change that. Our future will be so different from our pasts. It'll be filled with warmth and happiness." She tried to protest, but he stopped her by pressing a finger to her lips. "Marry me, and we'll carve out a future together."
Tears glistened in her eyes, and without warning, spilled over.
"So what do you say?" he asked eagerly, attributing her tears to happiness.
"I - I don't – don't know what to say…"
He laughed in amusement. "Just say yes! Or you can say that you'd look for that perfect house together with me. It'll be our home after all."
She shook her head.
"What –"
"Can we talk about this some other time, Sirius?"
"WHAT?"
"I can't marry you. Not now."
He released his hold and took a few steps backwards, staring at her as though he could not believe his eyes. "What are you talking about? Why can't you marry me now?"
"I just can't. Not now." She bit down so hard on her bottom lip that it bled, but she didn't take any notice.
"Then when? Tomorrow?" he asked, half-suspecting that she was pulling his leg.
"When the dark side is defeated," she whispered miserably.
"Stop kidding. I'm not finding this the least bit –"
"I'm not kidding."
Any trace of a smile was completely wiped off his face. "Are you trying to tell me you'd never marry me?"
"Not till the dark side is defeated," she repeated.
"But the Dark will always remain. Where there's Light, there'll be darkness too. This is a force of nature that even the strongest magic can't change!"
"When Voldemort and the Death Eaters are destroyed then."
He shook his head harshly as though to clear it, or to wake himself out of what seemed to be a bad nightmare. "Voldemort has wrecking havoc since I was twelve. We've been trying to get rid of him for the past twenty-three years, and we still don't know how long more it would take. Perhaps we may not even witness that in our lifetimes."
"I'm sorry."
"Sorry?" he repeated incredulously. "That's it? You're sorry? What is that supposed to mean? I thought we had something special. Was I mistaken? If you don't give a damn about me, why didn't you say so in the first place? Why go through all these months only to tell me now that you feel nothing?"
His long legs closed the distance between them in a flash and he gripped her by her shoulders more roughly than he realised, but both of them were too enveloped in their individual cocoons of unhappiness to notice that he was bruising her.
"What are you thinking, April? Tell me what you're thinking," he said, with desperation and fear in his voice.
She remained silent.
"Were you toying with me all this while?"
She shook her head vehemently.
He took a deep breath and held it. "I'll ask again. Will you marry me?"
"I can't…not now."
"For the last time, is that a yes or a no?"
She raised her eyes to meet his, and winced when she saw the frostiness in his dark orbs. Sirius had never looked at her this way.
"Yes, or no?" His voice was strained.
"I can't…"
"Either you're with me, or you're not. There're only two valid answers. Yes or no?"
She did not reply.
"ANSWER ME!"
She squeezed her eyes shut. "No."
Instantly, she felt his hands leave her and it took all her willpower and strength to open her eyes and stop her knees from buckling. A sharp pain pierced her heart when she caught sight of the man standing before her. His face was lined and his shoulders were slumped. He looked so forlorn and miserable that she had to restrain herself from telling him she longed to take back her hurtful reply and marry him immediately.
"I'm sorry, Sirius." Her voice was barely audible. "If there's anything I can do –"
"There's something you can do." He kept his eyes glued to a spot on the floor. "Leave me. Get out of my sight. I don't ever want to see you again."
April had no recollection of how she stumbled out of twelve Grimmauld Place, but she did remember the chill that filled her every inch of body.
And she knew the chill would be there for a long, long time.
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nunnya buiznes: Sorry to take so long. I'm back though! grin
MalletWielderofDoom: Don't hate Draco! And the long-awaited proposal chapter is finally up. :P
starangel2106: I don't have a piggy bank! LOL
peachgirl1608: Hope you're enjoying your new school term!
ANNE( v )79: Glad you liked April's moment of panic. Yes, here's the proposal scene, but I've a feeling that I'll get thrown rotten eggs for being nasty to the couple.
Savoy Truffle: Nope, Sirius and April are not getting married anytime soon. Read on to find out ;)
Diosa Alexia: That wasn't a 'forever break'. I'm back!!! Hooray!!!
Sallymander: Yes, I write "I Can See You" too. I've a third fic "Stranger From The Past" as well. Read all of them, okie? :)
Lil Lupin: Thanks for staying with my fic for the past…one year! Oh my gosh, can't believe I've been posting fanfics for more than a year…sounds scary…
Ms. Padfoot: ARGH!!!!!! I owe you reviews! Will read your two new chapters of BYM as soon as I can. Oh, and Sev will get nicer in this fic, cuz I like Alan Rickman!
phoebe666: You can't kill me now either, since you need me to heal Sirius' broken heart! (if I decide to…evil grin)
Padfoot-Dreamer: I'll not kill Sirius in this fic. And yes, the dementors are gone forever.
elvesmagic010: This fic is finally back! Thanks for reading & reviewing SFTP. Update "Last Chance"! :)
uNoeWho: Enjoy your new school term! How was your hols? Managed to get a good rest?
Katani Petitedra: Sirius didn't want to let Harry go with him to 'lure' the dementors initially, but he didn't have much of a choice cuz Harry's presence was needed and Harry could be quite stubborn at times. Part of the reason he relented was: he was there with Harry, so if need be, he could protect his godson.
black-cat-on-the-wall: The dementors are bitches? That's cute :)
funkysuperstar: Hi Donia! :) Your review made me VERY happy! Thanks for reading & liking my fics, and I feel very honoured that FBOFW is the first fanfic you've ever read!
lildarkkitty: SORRY, SORRY, SORRY!!! Sorry for not replying to your review of Chap 44! I promise that will NEVER happen again! :P You're right about Snape being protective of her, and you'll find out the reason in future chapters.
LILRKCHK: Why would I kill Remy?! Don't worry - Remy will survive in this fic.
Summerkins: You can wipe away your tears now since I'm back!!!! Erm...wait a minute...maybe not...cuz the next few chapters may not be happy ones...
Saffron Halifax: Thanks for adding this fic to your favourites! I hope you'd like this chapter as much! :)
Ren: Thanks for your long review! I love reviews and I especially love those LONG ones! :) Erm...there'll be no slash in this fic, so Remus and Severus will not end up together.
psycho-rebel: Cool nickname! :)
moe: I hope you're still reading this...I wanted to send you an email to let you know that a new chapter's uploaded but then I realised I don't have your contact. Anyway, to reply to your review, the Death Eaters were not there cuz they are humans (ok, wizards), and none of them would want to be near so many dementors!
potts: Are you still singing after this chapter? ;)
Tanglise: How was POA? David Thewlis was good, but I don't think Gary Oldman fits the role.
Sirius-Hotness: My mischief is always managed…well, almost…
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