Lights…Camera…CUT!
by MeowthMix

LIGHTS CAMERA CUT: Part 4

ASH: I get the bed on the right and you get the one on the left.

BROCK: What bed on the left? That's a couch!

ASH: Well, it's a fold out.

BROCK: No it's not!

ASH: Oh well. You have a pillow and blankets.

BROCK: You took all the pillows, blankets, and even the cushions for the couch and used them to build a fort!

ASH: Then you can sleep in the fort.

BROCK: I'm not sleeping in the fort.

ASH: As you wish PRINCESS.

BROCK: What's that supposed to mean?

ASH: Nothing...YOUR MAJESTY!

BROCK: On second thought, I'm sleeping in room number 5.

ASH: Is that where your crown is?

BROCK leaves

ASH: (yelling out the door) I'm serious! Is there a crown in there?

Scene moves to BROCK who is entering the office

JAMES is stuffing a spearow

BROCK: Um...excuse me...

JAMES: Huh? What do you want?

BROCK: I need the key for room number 5.

JAMES: (panicked) N-no...Why don't you stay in...uh...room number 5?

BROCK: That's what I just said!

JAMES: In that case I'm moving you to room number 5!

BROCK: ...OK...just give me the key...it's getting really late.

JAMES: Would you like some coffee to help you get sleep?

BROCK: Sure.

moments later

BROCK: So, you like to do taxidermy?

JAMES: What?

BROCK points to the many stuffed bird-type pokémon

JAMES: Nah...I just do it as a decoration...

BROCK: I agree...they do look rather nice...can I have one?

JAMES: I don't have enough.

BROCK looks at the garbage, which is filled with extra stuffed bird-types

BROCK's eyes wander out the window and he spots the scary house located on the hill next to the hotel

BROCK: Is that where you live?

JAMES: Yep. Just me, Jessie, and Steve.

BROCK: Who's Steve?

JAMES: So what brings you out here anyway?

BROCK: Oh, Ash and I are looking for a girl named Misty and a pikachu. They stole Ash's lottery winnings and skipped town.

JAMES: That bratty little redhead!

BROCK:...how'd you know she has red hair?

JAMES: Because most people who steal lottery money have parents that were brunettes and siblings that had black and blonde hair. And due to process of elimination she has red hair.

BROCK: Oh.

JAMES gets up

JAMES: I'd better go to bed now.

BROCK: I thought you said you were going to give me coffee.

JAMES: Coffee? At night? You're weird!

BROCK: You never gave me the key for room number 5.

JAMES: That's OK. You can just climb in through the window.

BROCK: I see...

JAMES: Well, I'm sorry about that girl and the pikachu and that funny looking detective you sent off to look for them. I hope you find their bodies soon.

JAMES walks off in the direction of the scary house

BROCK hurries back to the room he left ASH in

ASH is asleep in the fort

BROCK: Ash! Wake up!

ASH: ...Wha?...What's goin' on?...

BROCK: Get up!

ASH: Noon comes earlier every day...

BROCK: I think I know what happened to Misty and Pikachu!

ASH: Good. Tell them to stop waking me up. (lays back down)

BROCK: This is important, Ash! I think something horrible happened to them!

ASH: They had it coming for stealing my money.

BROCK drags ASH out of bed

BROCK: Maybe if we ask that Jessie person the strange man mentioned we could find out what is going on.

ASH: Can you carry me?

BROCK: Of course.

BROCK carries ASH to the house

They enter the house

ASH looks out the window and sees JAMES approaching

ASH: You go distract the deranged man and I'll find his probably also crazy friend.

BROCK: Perfect.

BROCK runs out the door to JAMES

JAMES: Why were you in my house?

BROCK: I was looking for you.

JAMES: Why?

BROCK: Why what?

JAMES: Why where you looking for me?

BROCK: No reason.

JAMES: But-

BROCK: Why is there jelly dripping out of your pocket?

JAMES: Hey! Who's asking the questions here?

BROCK: Well, who's distracting whom?

JAMES: Ah! Touché!

Scene moves to ASH, who has reached JESSIE's room

Nobody there

ASH moves to the living room

Nobody there

ASH moves to the bathroom

Nobody there

ASH moves to the kitchen

STEVE is there

ASH moves to the fruit cellar

He sees the back of somebody with long pink hair sitting in a chair

ASH reaches out slowly just to build the suspense

INTERMISSION

END INTERMISSION

ASH grabs the chair and spins it around

He gasps as he sees the most horrifying sight imaginable!

A mannequin was seated at the chair with the wig drooping over its vacant face

ASH screams

He turns and sees JAMES in a dress and a pink wig, holding a donut

ASH screams again

BROCK appears behind him and shoves JAMES into a closet

...Or at least he thought it was a closet...it was actually the door leading outside allowing JAMES to get away

The next day

ASH: That had to be one of the freakiest things that's ever happened...well, except that one time...

BROCK: I'm with you on that one.

ASH: But what happened to Misty, Pikachu, and the detective...and my money!

BROCK: They've gone to a better place.

MEOWTH: That's right!

ASH and BROCK turn to find MEOWTH, MISTY, and PIKACHU standing behind them

ASH: And just where have you been?

MISTY: Well, the crazy guy came in when I was taking a shower and hit me with a broom and ran off.

MEOWTH: What was dat blood-like substance, anyway?

MISTY: I don't know...

BROCK: Based on James behavior, it was probably jelly from a donut.

PIKACHU: Pika pika!

ASH: But where did you go?

MISTY: I didn't want to spend any more time in that nut house so I drove to Las Vegas to waste all your money.

ASH: What?

MISTY: I nearly doubled all of it but then lost it all in one crazy bet in some alley that was obviously fixed.

ASH: ...My...money...

MEOWTH: Well, dat guy kicked me, giggled like a schoolgirl, and fell into the pond.

BROCK: This still doesn't explain the matter of Jessie.

JESSIE: I'll fill that one. You see, we decided to start running a motel about a year back. It seemed to go smoothly until he picked up that nasty habit of stuffing birds. I needed a break from it all so I took a vacation in the Bahamas. I guess leaving him alone wasn't such a good idea...But what ever happened to Steve?

They all think

A police car pulls up and JENNY gets out of it

JENNY: Are you Jessie?

JESSIE: If I say 'yes' are you going to arrest me?

JENNY: Well, I found your friend back in a town 3 miles east of here. He's in jail.

JESSIE: This isn't about the whole trying to kill people thing is it?

JENNY: He just happens to be the craziest, crossdressing-est, donut thief in the general area!

ASH: Donut thief?

JENNY: He's robbed every donut shop within a 100-mile radius of this location!

MEOWTH: Dat explains all da donuts.

BROCK: What'd he do with them?

JENNY: He ate half of them. The rest were found hidden inside each of those stuffed birds.

EVERYONE: Eeeeew!


"That was...um...interesting..." Jessie said as she 'accidentally' threw the script into the fireplace.

"Just how many of these scripts are left?" Misty asked.

Jessie picked up the large pile of back-up scripts and prepared to 'accidentally' throw them into the fire place, too.

Meowth stopped her, "Wait! We have ta pick one'a dem! Our fans are expecting a movie!"

"Forget them! I have better things to do than entertain people," Ash said.

Misty snorted, "Like what?"

"Uh...like...finishing that novel I'm writing," he replied.

"You're not writing a novel," Brock said.

"Did I say novel? I meant shopping list!"

"Look," James told them, "Meowth is right. We're never getting out of here until we pick one of them!" The actors all sighed and picked up the next script, opening it up to the next page.


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