Kim reached beside and felt that the bed was empty. She sat up and
adjusted her eyes to the dark, looking around the room. Bosco wasn't
there. She looked at the clock and saw that it was 4:00 in the morning.
She got up and put on her robe. Walking up the hallway, she stopped in to
check on Joey and Johnny - both were sound asleep.
She heard a glass or bottle being set down on the table in the living room. She slowly walked up the hallway and saw the silhouette of Bosco against the slowly lightening sky. She watched him sit forward and pick the bottle of beer back up and take a drink. He set it down again, next to the other three bottles that were already empty. He had some kind of case open on the table in front of him, but Kim couldn't tell what it was.
"Bos?" she called to him quietly. No answer. "Bos, are you alright?" A slight nod of his head as she approached him.
"Go back to bed Kim," he said, finally looking up at her. He didn't say it meanly, but she could tell that he didn't want to be bothered. As she approached she could tell that he had a slight buzz on from the beer. That, and he was physically and emotionally exhausted after what happened earlier.
She put a hand on his head, gently rubbing the short hairs on the back of his head. She looked down at the case and pulled her hand away from him. "What're you doing with that?" she asked, starting to become nervous.
"Go back to bed," he said a little more firmly now.
"No. I don't want that in this house. Where did you get it?" she asked, firmness in her voice too.
He reached over, threw a small box in the case and closed it, turning the combination lock to make sure it couldn't be opened.
"Glen gave it to me this morning," he said quietly. "He said it was his first and he gave it to me when we went shooting this morning.
"I'm sorry, Bos. But, I don't want that thing in the house with the boys. It's bad enough that your off-duty gun is here. I know it's locked up and I know you've gone over all that stuff about gun safety with Joey, but they make me really nervous, Bos. Please," she said, interrupted when Bosco suddenly stood up.
"I'll take it out of here today," he said, walking over to put it in the front closet behind their long winter coats. "Promise."
"Are you okay, babe?" Kim asked him, watching him pace.
"Yeah. Never better," he answered, picking up his empty beer bottles and putting them on the counter in the kitchen. She walked up behind him and hugged him from behind. She could feel his tenseness and he tensed more when she touched him.
"I love you," Kim whispered to him.
"Me too," he answered looking out the kitchen window at the brightening sky. "Morning soon. You should get some more sleep," he said, breaking away from her and putting his sweatshirt on, somewhat unsteady from the beer.
"Where are you going?" she asked him, starting to worry.
"I'm gonna go for a run. I'm too keyed-up to sleep and I can't sit anymore," he said, opening the door and looking back at her. "I'm okay, Kim. I just need some time," he said, closing the door behind him.
"Be careful," Kim said before he had closed the door all the way.
"Yup," she heard him say and then he was gone.
Kim walked over to the window to watch him. He stretched his legs a little on the front steps and then started his run. "Bosco, how can I help you?" she thought to herself as she started a pot of coffee.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
After running for about an hour, Bosco slowed up and stopped to catch his breath, not even sure where he was. He bent over and put his hands on his knees, trying to suck in some air. He felt a chill and noticed that he was sweating from his run. He stood up and found himself standing in front of Glen Hobart's building. The building where he'd died. The building where he had thought for a moment that he was going to die. But that was before he'd realized that Glen just wanted to use him to commit suicide - suicide by cop.
He thought back to the previous afternoon when he was on the roof, the gun to his head. He saw again the clip falling from the gun and landing on the ground alongside his foot. Glen's words, "I'm gonna end this on 'one'," ran threw his mind again. And that's when he knew that it wasn't about Glen killing Bosco. It was about Glen wanting the hurt to go away - wanting to end his own pain. He just didn't have the guts to do it himself - or he wanted to go out the way his 'career kills' had gone out - who knows. Bosco felt himself start to shiver with the morning breeze cutting threw his sweaty clothes. He took a last look toward the roof of the building, "What now, Glen? What now?" he said quietly to himself and began walking back toward home.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The phone rang at 6:00 a.m. "Who the hell could that be?" Faith thought to herself as she reached for it.
"Hello?" she said as Fred shifted beside her. "Kim? What's wrong?" she asked sitting up. Knowing that it was Kim got Fred's attention and he was fully awake as well. Faith had told him what had happened and although they never really got along, it still must have been a terrible thing to go through.
"Okay. I'll get dressed and start looking too. I'll start at the Precinct first and then I'll work from there. Rose hasn't heard from him either?" Faith asked as she stood up and started grabbing clothes from her dresser.
"Okay, it'll be okay, Kim. I'm sure he's just blowing off steam somewhere. He'll be home soon. Call me on the cell phone if you hear from him," she said before hanging up. She looked over at Fred.
"What's wrong? Where are you going?" he asked her.
"Bosco's been gone since about 4:30 this morning. He told Kim he was going for a run, but she hasn't heard from him yet. I guess he had a few beers before he took off," she told him.
"Can you blame him? Well, do you have any idea where to look for him?" he asked.
"No. I'm gonna start at the Precinct and then at the range. He likes to go there to blow off steam sometimes," she said as she finished dressing and grabbed her shoes. "I'll call you," she said, giving him a kiss as she started down the hallway.
"Mom?" Emily asked as she passed her doorway.
Faith leaned in and whispered. "It's early Em. Go back to sleep."
"What's wrong?" she asked her mother.
"Bosco's upset about yesterday," she said, knowing that Emily had heard Faith telling Fred what had happened. "Kim's not sure where he is and I'm gonna help her look for him."
"You don't think that he..." Emily said, not able to finish the sentence.
"No!" Faith answered quickly. "Absolutely not. He's just upset and we want to make sure he talks about it, Em. He'll be fine. You'll see," she said. "Now go back to sleep before you wake up Charlie. I'll be home soon."
Faith grabbed her keys and pulled the apartment door shut behind her.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Nobody had seen him at the station so Faith made her way over to the range to see if maybe he was there. She was looking around when her cell phone rang.
"Hello?" she answered and heard Bosco's voice on the other end.
"Hey, Faith. It's me," he said.
"Hey, you. Are you okay?" she asked him.
"Yeah. Sorry that you got dragged out. I'm fine. Kim just overreacted," he said.
"No problem. As long as you're okay. Are you home now?" she asked him, trying to gauge his mood by the sound of his voice.
"Yeah. I'm home. I went for a run and then stopped for coffee at a diner. I didn't want to wake up the kids and I needed to think," he explained.
"Okay. You want me to come over?" she offered.
"Nah. I'll see you at work tomorrow. Lieu made me take a day off, but I'll be back tomorrow. We're gonna take the kids to the park later and just hang out together. Thanks again, Faith," he said, not sounding too bad.
"Anytime, Bos. I mean it," she said before hanging up.
Faith was back at home and her phone rang again. This time it was Kim.
"Thanks, Faith. I'm sorry that I made you go out so early," Kim said.
"No problem, Kim. Really. So, is he okay - really?" Faith asked her.
"I'm not sure. For right now he is. He just took a shower and now he's crashed on the bed sleeping," Kim said.
"Okay. Well, call me if you need me. Bye," Faith said, hanging up.
"Is he okay?" Fred asked over his cup of coffee.
"I don't know," was all Faith said.
She heard a glass or bottle being set down on the table in the living room. She slowly walked up the hallway and saw the silhouette of Bosco against the slowly lightening sky. She watched him sit forward and pick the bottle of beer back up and take a drink. He set it down again, next to the other three bottles that were already empty. He had some kind of case open on the table in front of him, but Kim couldn't tell what it was.
"Bos?" she called to him quietly. No answer. "Bos, are you alright?" A slight nod of his head as she approached him.
"Go back to bed Kim," he said, finally looking up at her. He didn't say it meanly, but she could tell that he didn't want to be bothered. As she approached she could tell that he had a slight buzz on from the beer. That, and he was physically and emotionally exhausted after what happened earlier.
She put a hand on his head, gently rubbing the short hairs on the back of his head. She looked down at the case and pulled her hand away from him. "What're you doing with that?" she asked, starting to become nervous.
"Go back to bed," he said a little more firmly now.
"No. I don't want that in this house. Where did you get it?" she asked, firmness in her voice too.
He reached over, threw a small box in the case and closed it, turning the combination lock to make sure it couldn't be opened.
"Glen gave it to me this morning," he said quietly. "He said it was his first and he gave it to me when we went shooting this morning.
"I'm sorry, Bos. But, I don't want that thing in the house with the boys. It's bad enough that your off-duty gun is here. I know it's locked up and I know you've gone over all that stuff about gun safety with Joey, but they make me really nervous, Bos. Please," she said, interrupted when Bosco suddenly stood up.
"I'll take it out of here today," he said, walking over to put it in the front closet behind their long winter coats. "Promise."
"Are you okay, babe?" Kim asked him, watching him pace.
"Yeah. Never better," he answered, picking up his empty beer bottles and putting them on the counter in the kitchen. She walked up behind him and hugged him from behind. She could feel his tenseness and he tensed more when she touched him.
"I love you," Kim whispered to him.
"Me too," he answered looking out the kitchen window at the brightening sky. "Morning soon. You should get some more sleep," he said, breaking away from her and putting his sweatshirt on, somewhat unsteady from the beer.
"Where are you going?" she asked him, starting to worry.
"I'm gonna go for a run. I'm too keyed-up to sleep and I can't sit anymore," he said, opening the door and looking back at her. "I'm okay, Kim. I just need some time," he said, closing the door behind him.
"Be careful," Kim said before he had closed the door all the way.
"Yup," she heard him say and then he was gone.
Kim walked over to the window to watch him. He stretched his legs a little on the front steps and then started his run. "Bosco, how can I help you?" she thought to herself as she started a pot of coffee.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
After running for about an hour, Bosco slowed up and stopped to catch his breath, not even sure where he was. He bent over and put his hands on his knees, trying to suck in some air. He felt a chill and noticed that he was sweating from his run. He stood up and found himself standing in front of Glen Hobart's building. The building where he'd died. The building where he had thought for a moment that he was going to die. But that was before he'd realized that Glen just wanted to use him to commit suicide - suicide by cop.
He thought back to the previous afternoon when he was on the roof, the gun to his head. He saw again the clip falling from the gun and landing on the ground alongside his foot. Glen's words, "I'm gonna end this on 'one'," ran threw his mind again. And that's when he knew that it wasn't about Glen killing Bosco. It was about Glen wanting the hurt to go away - wanting to end his own pain. He just didn't have the guts to do it himself - or he wanted to go out the way his 'career kills' had gone out - who knows. Bosco felt himself start to shiver with the morning breeze cutting threw his sweaty clothes. He took a last look toward the roof of the building, "What now, Glen? What now?" he said quietly to himself and began walking back toward home.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
The phone rang at 6:00 a.m. "Who the hell could that be?" Faith thought to herself as she reached for it.
"Hello?" she said as Fred shifted beside her. "Kim? What's wrong?" she asked sitting up. Knowing that it was Kim got Fred's attention and he was fully awake as well. Faith had told him what had happened and although they never really got along, it still must have been a terrible thing to go through.
"Okay. I'll get dressed and start looking too. I'll start at the Precinct first and then I'll work from there. Rose hasn't heard from him either?" Faith asked as she stood up and started grabbing clothes from her dresser.
"Okay, it'll be okay, Kim. I'm sure he's just blowing off steam somewhere. He'll be home soon. Call me on the cell phone if you hear from him," she said before hanging up. She looked over at Fred.
"What's wrong? Where are you going?" he asked her.
"Bosco's been gone since about 4:30 this morning. He told Kim he was going for a run, but she hasn't heard from him yet. I guess he had a few beers before he took off," she told him.
"Can you blame him? Well, do you have any idea where to look for him?" he asked.
"No. I'm gonna start at the Precinct and then at the range. He likes to go there to blow off steam sometimes," she said as she finished dressing and grabbed her shoes. "I'll call you," she said, giving him a kiss as she started down the hallway.
"Mom?" Emily asked as she passed her doorway.
Faith leaned in and whispered. "It's early Em. Go back to sleep."
"What's wrong?" she asked her mother.
"Bosco's upset about yesterday," she said, knowing that Emily had heard Faith telling Fred what had happened. "Kim's not sure where he is and I'm gonna help her look for him."
"You don't think that he..." Emily said, not able to finish the sentence.
"No!" Faith answered quickly. "Absolutely not. He's just upset and we want to make sure he talks about it, Em. He'll be fine. You'll see," she said. "Now go back to sleep before you wake up Charlie. I'll be home soon."
Faith grabbed her keys and pulled the apartment door shut behind her.
^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^*^
Nobody had seen him at the station so Faith made her way over to the range to see if maybe he was there. She was looking around when her cell phone rang.
"Hello?" she answered and heard Bosco's voice on the other end.
"Hey, Faith. It's me," he said.
"Hey, you. Are you okay?" she asked him.
"Yeah. Sorry that you got dragged out. I'm fine. Kim just overreacted," he said.
"No problem. As long as you're okay. Are you home now?" she asked him, trying to gauge his mood by the sound of his voice.
"Yeah. I'm home. I went for a run and then stopped for coffee at a diner. I didn't want to wake up the kids and I needed to think," he explained.
"Okay. You want me to come over?" she offered.
"Nah. I'll see you at work tomorrow. Lieu made me take a day off, but I'll be back tomorrow. We're gonna take the kids to the park later and just hang out together. Thanks again, Faith," he said, not sounding too bad.
"Anytime, Bos. I mean it," she said before hanging up.
Faith was back at home and her phone rang again. This time it was Kim.
"Thanks, Faith. I'm sorry that I made you go out so early," Kim said.
"No problem, Kim. Really. So, is he okay - really?" Faith asked her.
"I'm not sure. For right now he is. He just took a shower and now he's crashed on the bed sleeping," Kim said.
"Okay. Well, call me if you need me. Bye," Faith said, hanging up.
"Is he okay?" Fred asked over his cup of coffee.
"I don't know," was all Faith said.
