Chapter 2--"Once More, With Feeling."
"I feel like we're losing him, David." Dorian paced the bedroom, her hands bunched into fists at her sides, her cane abandoned by the door. She had been doing for a solid half an hour and it was only 6:30 AM. Not that David didn't like to comfort Dorian. In fact, he LOVED to comfort Dorian because he usually got a reward afterwards, but it was 6:30 AM. David loved sleep too.
"He's just becoming so much like Todd. I'm afraid that one day I'll look at him and I'll see that monster staring back at me." Dorian stopped in the middle of the floor, her eyebrows knitting together in worry before she began pacing again. David frowned and scooted to the foot of the bed, running a hand through his hair, which was just starting to gray.
"Jack is not Todd. You know that. Neither is Starr." Dorian paused again, turning to glance across the room at her night-table, which was adorned with several framed photos. Her eyes passed over pictures of Cassie, then Kelly, then Adriana, and finally rested on Blair.
David was briefly confused before he noticed where Dorian's attention was focused. Feeling a pang in his stomach at seeing Dorian hurting, he rose from the bed and padded lightly over to her, wrapped his arms around her from behind. Dorian turned in his arms, resting her head against his chest.
"Oh, David. They're all I have left of her." David didn't need to ask who Dorian was talking about. They never said her name. Not anymore.
Half an hour later, the front door opened and Adriana entered, clutching Evan's tiny hand in hers. Her son gazed around with sleepy eyes, searching for Grandpa David. He was always so much fun. He gave Evan cookies when Mommy said that he couldn't have any. He played lots of games with Evan too, like hide and seek. It usually took Grandpa David a very long time to find Evan, though. It didn't occur to Evan's five year old mind that David might not be looking.
"You have to be really quiet, Evan, okay? Everyone might still be sleeping." Adriana whispered, shivering slightly. The house was always cold in the morning. She led her son over to the stairs and sat down on the first step, pulling him lightly so that he would join her.
"Mommy?" Evan asked after a few minutes. "Why are we here?" Adriana glanced away nervously, not wanting to directly lie to her son, but not wanting to tell the whole truth either.
"Well, you like it here, don't you? Did Jack promise to show you some of his magic tricks the next time your came over?" Changing the subject seemed like a good idea. Evan pondered her statements and then nodded before posing another question,
"Wasn't Daddy supposed to visit me today, though?" Adriana bristled. How did he know? He had been asleep when she and Rex had been talking. Scowling at him darkly, she pursed her lips.
"Evan Cramer, were you just pretending to be asleep yesterday? Were you eavesdropping?" Evan grinned sheepishly and ducked his head lightly, strands of black hair falling in his face.
"No, Mommy. I woke up and you were yelling at Daddy 'bout something. Then Daddy said that he would be back today to see me." There was an awkward silence. Adriana knew what it was like to not have your biological father, but before she could respond, there was a voice from the top of the stairs.
"Adriana? Is something wrong?" Adriana shifted, turning around to see Dorian standing on the top of the stairs, still in her pajamas, with a shirtless David beside her.
Jack stretched in his bed and rolled over, shoving the pillow over his head. Voices traveled from down the hall, spilling out of the vent just above his bed. He pulled the pillow off his head and glared at the glowing red numbers of his digital clock, that proudly proclaimed that it was 7:15 in the morning. Growling lightly, Jack pulled his weary body out of bed, intending to go mouth off at whoever was talking so loudly. Jack hadn't been able to fall asleep until four in the morning. He wanted to sleep!
Throwing a shirt on over his baggy sleep pants, he slammed gingerly picked his way through the various items thrown around his room before pulling open his bedroom door and storming down the hallway towards the stairs, where the noise was coming from. When he arrived, he saw Adriana standing at the foot of the stairs with Evan while Dorian and David stood at the top. Jesus, it was some kind of family reunion. Next thing he knew, Starr would show up, along with Kelly and Kevin and their little girl.
"Hey, I'm tired, you know!" He snapped, his scowl directed mainly at Dorian.
"JACK!" Evan yelped with glee and bolted up the stairs, grabbing his cousin's hand and holding it proudly. "You promised to show me magic tricks." The five year old's voice was solemn.
Jack blinked, the vague memory of a promise returning. Oh. He had forgotten about that.
"Evan, it's kind of early." He said, his tone slightly annoyed, but Evan would have none of it. He began to pull Jack back towards his bedroom.
"Show me! Show me! You promised!" Jack glanced reluctantly at Evan and walked with his cousin down the hall.
"Crisis averted." David muttered under his breath. He had been preparing for another blow out between Jack and Dorian. Thank God for Evan.
"Mom, is it alright if Evan and I stay here for the day?" Adriana piped up as he walked up the stairs to join her mother.
"Of course, dear." Dorian said with a smile. She loved taking care of her girls. She had failed with Blair, but she wouldn't fail with Adriana and Kelly. Even if Kelly had remarried Kevin and Adriana was raising Rex Balsom's child.
Jack shuffled his card deck wearily as Evan puttered around his room, going through his cousin's things. Such a nosy little weirdo, but Jack was fond of him and he wasn't going to complain. There was a thud and then the sound of labored breathing. Jack cast a concerned look in Evan's direction only to see the little boy squirming underneath Jack's bed. Weirdo.
"Hey, Evan, I've got the cards ready." Jack hoped Evan wasn't trapped under there. The little boy crawled out, dragging a shoebox with him. Curiously he took off the top and glanced inside.
"Who's this?" Evan asked, holding a crumpled picture up to his face for inspection. Jack's eyes widened and he leapt at his cousin, grabbing for the photo.
"Don't touch that!" Evan cried out at Jack's sudden outburst and dropped the photo. It fluttered to the ground lightly, landing on the hardwood floor. Evan jumped onto Jack's bed as the older cousin knelt down and picked up the photo, glancing at it wistfully.
"Is that your mommy and daddy?" Evan asked, his eyes wide and curious. Jack gave his cousin a decidedly nasty look and then nodded slightly.
"Do you remember them?" Evan was full of questions. He had only met his Daddy once when he was very small and then once again about a year ago. Having two parents was something strange and foreign to him.
"Sort of." Jack mumbled, tossing the photo back into the shoebox, which was filled to the brim with more photos of the same two people, staring back at him. He kicked the box under the bed and frowned at the floor.
"Do you remember what they sound like and stuff?"
"No."
"Then what do you remember?"
"A feeling."
"What kind of feeling?"
Jack paused, as if asking himself the same question. He took a breath and then spoke, "Have you ever been in your bed and your mom comes into the room and you just know that it's her without looking?" Evan nodded. "How did she feel to you? When you couldn't see her, but you knew she was there?" Evan stuck out his lower lip and tilted his head to the side.
"She felt like Mommy. Do you mean that your mommy and daddy are ghosts?" Jacked sighed and shook his head.
"No. It's just sometimes I can…." He trailed off and glanced away, quickly swiping a hand across his eyes, as if brushing away dust.
"Evan, I'm too tired to show you magic tricks. Go be with your mom."
Starr sat on her bathroom floor, small beads of sweat breaking out on the back of her neck. Her breathing was quick and erratic as she clutched her arms around herself. Gooseflesh rose out on her arms and she sniffed lightly, lowered her head, hair covering her face.
"Why me?" Her tone was half pleading, half sarcastic. A small strip sat on her closed toilet, bearing a blue stripe across it. Starr was terrified, sick, and pregnant. There were two thoughts running through her mind.
"Help me.", was one of the thoughts. The second was, "Thank God Nathan's not the father…."
