Disclaimer: Ok, I admit, I had nothing to do with the creation of Saiyuki or these kick ass characters. You should thank the great Kazuya Minekura for that (thank you, thank you). So yeah…

Summary: Like the title say. Nothing but school comedy, romance, total insanity, stress, exams, teachers, students, fights, and a whole lot of trouble! What happens when you put the Sanzo-ikkou to school? -THIS-

Author Note: I was bored in Spanish (once again) so I decided to write this. It's not as good as the others but I hope it brings a smile to your face and please R&R, k? Enjoy!


1st PERIOD: LITERATURE

PART ONE

"And so," Mrs. Takami droned on, "The Montagues and the Capulets disregarded their hatred of each other and with their past behind them, started all over again as one." Mrs. Takami closed her literature book containing the story of Romeo and Juliet. She glanced at the class and didn't fail to notice the red-haired young man snoring loudly in the back.

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"Gojyo," a girl said sweetly. "Yeah?" Gojyo asked. He was standing beneath a balcony, looking up at the girl who was leaning forward on top. She looked at him passionately. She had long, black hair, and a beautiful innocent face. She was wearing a nightdress that was made of nothing but pure silk. The full moon shone over her, making her look like an angel sent from the heavens above. Damn, Gojyo thought, for a dream, this isn't so bad. "So what's your name, beautiful?" Gojyo asked. The girl blushed slightly and said, "It's Juliet." "Well, Juliet, I'm Gojyo. How about you come down so we can have some fun tonight." Juliet shook her head. "But I mustn't. I am a Capulet! And you, my love, is a Montague." Gojyo blinked. "I'm a what?" "A Montague." Damn, I should have paid attention in class when I had the chance. "Ok, so what if I'm a Montago! I still want to kiss you!"

Once again Juliet blushed and proclaimed, "Oh Gojyo, deny thy father and deny thy name!" "Uh…sure, whatever." Taking her eyes off of Gojyo, she looked up the clear, dark sky. "Then if your love for me is as strong as I, we shall get married." Gojyo, his jaw dropping to the floor, thought: Damn! And I thought I was fast! Shit! I'm not ready to commit to a relationship like that…even though she is one pretty, sexy, fine…wait a minute. What the heck am I talking about! If this is a dream, then I can marry her without actually marrying her! He shifted his jaw to the right position and smiled back at Juliet. "Ok, beautiful. I'll marry ya. But first, you come down so we can have one hell of a party if ya know what I mean." He grinned at her mischievously. Juliet grinned back. "If you want a piece of me, them I'm afraid you have to come up and get me." Playing hard to get…I like…

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What the hell is he thinking? Sanzo thought. He was sitting two seats from Gojyo but even from this view he could see the horny kappa gripping the desk tightly and displaying a sick grin on his face. He looked around and saw that he wasn't the only one watching. Everyone in the class was staring at the red-haired freak with opened mouths and the teacher, Mrs. Takami, just stood there with her hand clasped over her mouth. Sanzo looked back at Gojyo and felt his eyes growing wide. Oh shit. If Gojyo was doing what Sanzo was thinking he was doing, it appeared that the pervy kappa was having sex with his desk. He was on top of the desk in an odd position and moving his ass back and forth. The thing was, his eyes were close, so Sanzo knew he was sleeping and not being stupid. Forget stupid. This is some insane shit right here…

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-chirp chirp- What is that god damn irritating sound? –chirp chirp- Gojyo, eyes still closed, got up from the bed, opened the window, and grabbing the closest object near him, threw it at the birds. The dozens of birds that was feasting on their daily breakfast had scattered towards the sky. Damn birds, he muttered. He closed the window, lazily walked towards the bed, climbed on top of the mattress, and covered himself with the blanket. Five minutes later, his arm was getting stiff so he stretched them. He felt something soft. Hmmm…what's this? With one opened eye, he glanced towards the direction of his hand. He was greeted with a, "Good morning, my love."

Gojyo, surprised and shocked, immediately got up from the bed. What the-? As he was doing this, his foot got tangled from the blanket, landing him flat on the floor. Juliet, her cheeks red and her eyes shining, leaned on the side of the bed and asked, "Tell me, my love. Are you always like this after having sex?" Gojyo, rubbing his head, glanced up at Juliet and suddenly his breathing stopped. Juliet was fully naked; typical really, since the blanket was on the floor and her clothes was on the other side of the room. 0.0 I had sex with her! Whoa…c'mon Gojyo, remember? I know you weren't drunk buddy. Let's see…oh yeah, I talked to her last night at the balcony… and something about getting married…and then this happened. Damn, I'm lovin' this dream! Smiling, Juliet got up and kissed Gojyo on the lips gently, then went to the bathroom to wash up. Still in a daze, Gojyo was saying to himself: Damn, I'm lovin' this dream! Damn, I'm lovin' this dream!

JUST THEN--

"Who the hell are you!" Gojyo, fully awake now, turned towards the voice. Oh shit! Even in my dreams! You hafta be kidding me! Releasing a huge sigh, Gojyo put his shirt back on (sorry fangirls), clenched his fist and smacked the person in front of him. "You damn monkey! For once fuck off and leave me alone!" The brown-haired kid with golden eyes got up and rubbed his head. "Dammit that hurt! And I'm not a monkey, got that! I'm Juliet's younger brother so why don't YOU FUCK OFF!" With that, Goku gave back what Gojyo had given him. His head stinging with pain, Gojyo muttered a string of curse words. "Ok, that's it! I don't care who you really are but you're not going to ruin my perfect dream! You hear that!" "What the fuck are you talking about?" "Forget it. Ow! Hey, monkey, you can stop hitting me anytime now!" "No! You're a Montague and you deserve to die!"

Again with the Montago shit! Gojyo ducked from the blow and lifted Goku from the ground. Then once again, he opened the window and flinged Goku outside. After 10 long minutes of waiting he heard a huge THUD. Well, it's about damn time! He looked down at Goku. Since he was so far down he looked like a brown dot. Angrily, Goku pointed his fist at him and yelled, "I'll kill you, you asshole! Just because you broke both of my legs and fractured half of my rib bones, and not to mention nearly shattering my nerve cells by dropping me from a 343, 198 feet tall building (lol), that doesn't mean I can't go back up there and kill your fuck-" Gojyo shut the window and walked away. Bullshit. He laid on the bed, clasping his hands beneath his head and sighed. At least that blonde corrupted jackass didn't show up.

"Someone call 911!" Mrs. Takami yelled. Half of the students surrounded the window, looking down at the 10 feet tall school building until they saw a 5'4" brown-hairedkid with golden eyes. (Not Goku. Lucky for him he overslept and is safe in his bed. That kid that I explained…he just happened to look like Goku. Sucks for him really.) He was absolutely still and his leg was twisted in an odd shape. Blood was oozing from his head. Sanzo, slightly amused, had remained in his chair, and was nowwatching the so-called murderer walk back to his seat. A while ago, Gojyo had been cussing and he mentioned the monkey (now that I think about it, where the hell is he?) and out of nowhere, he grabbed an innocent bystander and tossed him out the window. Just like that. Someone had retrieved a cell phone from their purse and was already telling the person on the other line what had happened. "Yeah, and he just threw Guko out the window!" Mrs. Takami shook her head and told the class to go back to their seats. This is some day. I should have stayed home and send a sub to watch over the class. Damn my love for teaching! A female student with short blue hair (Yeah blue! This is an anime-based story so go alongwith me here.) raised her hand. "Mrs. Takami, why can't we WAKE Gojyo up!" "Yeah!" "Let's kill that bitch!" "He ain't a bitch! He's just crazy." "You got that right!" "Are you insane! You can't just WAKE him up!" Mrs. Takami interrupted. Why the hell? Sanzo thought, not fair he get to sleep in class. "Because," Mrs. Takami answered, "Bad things happen to someone who wakes up a sleepwalker." A gust of wind escaped from outside, sending a chill towards the students, and creating a creepy aura. Whatever. He just better damn wake up soon. This is getting really stupid.

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Another A/N: Whew! Now that took long to type! Well, stick around for part 2. Peace for now!