pt.20

(CIA Underground)

Sloane: Hey Jack.

Jack: (on computer looking up Russian Spy Chicks Gone Wild-slaps laptop shut) Hello. What can I do for you?

Sloane: (shrugs shoulders) Do you notice anything different about me?

Jack: No.

Sloane: Damn. I'm using this new moisturizer and it says you should see results within a week.

Jack: (sees Weiss flirting with Nadia) That's nice. (walks away towards Weiss-pushes him down) Hey Baby. I've got a party in my pants that's just waiting for its surprise guest.

Nadia: Huh?

Jack: (winking) You know what I mean.

Nadia: What?

Jack: (staring) Aw, screw this. You're too much work. (walks away-hollers) I'm still gonna get you Weiss. (walks over towards Sloane) Hey, you wanna go hit some strip clubs?

Sloane: You know I can't! That is so irresponsible, it makes me wanna puke. You know tonight is must see TV on NBC! You disgust me Jack. (walks away)

Jack: I wonder what Sark's doing?

(MOSCOW)

Sergie: (hands Vaughn container with gun) You'll wanna practice putting this together.

Vaughn: (looks) Holy snickerdoodles! It's a gun. And there's bullets, and more bullets, and a trigger. Woohoo!

Sergie: (stares for a moment and then leaves)

Sydney: I'm gonna go for run. (goes outside-comes back in) It's too cold out there. (grabs a pair of binoculars to stare into Sergie's home)

Vaughn: This sucks! There's no directions or anything. (goes into kitchen)

Sydney: We should get to bed. What are you doing?

Vaughn: Trying to fill the gun up with water.

Sydney: What happened to the bullets?

Vaughn: (silent)

Sydney: (looks around-sees bullets scattered across the floor with some legos, a few in the fire place, and the dog chewing on one)

Vaughn: Uh, I don't think it came with bullets.

Later on, Syd's in bed.

Vaughn: (comes in wearing his one piece pajama set with footies and carrying a stuffed Weiss doll) So where do I sleep?

Sydney: Here, in bed with me.

Vaughn: But you said I couldn't sleep with you anymore. Are we still dating?

Sydney: Yes, I just don't like you to touch me at all. But you can sleep with me tonight.

Vaughn: Ok.

Sydney: (turns of the lights) Did you go to the bathroom?

Vaughn: (smelling her hair-getting turned on) Yep.

Sydney: That's better be a flashlight underneath the covers.

Vaughn: Actually its my SpiderMan poster (pulls it out from underneath covers) I almost forgot I brought it with me. Do you still have the one I gave you for Christmas?

(Sydney's house-raging party going on)

Jack: (answering door to pizza man) Just bring em on in. And if you have any hot friends tell em to stop by.

Sloane: (dancing in a John Travolta Saturday Night Fever suit) This is your best idea yet.

Nadia: I don't think Sydney would like this.

Sloane: Why don't you be a good daughter and listen to your daddy. Go get us another keg.

Weiss: Alright, where's the beer bong.

Jack: There's no beer for you.

Weiss: No, no. There's plenty of beer, I just saw a case out on the porch.

Jack: I said no beer for you. (snaps his fingers-Sark appears) Please escort this man out.

Sark: As you'd like sir.

Weiss: (being dragged away) Oh come on. This is so not fair!

Sloane: (dancing) Come on Jack, bump butts with me. Hey, do you wanna get it on a secret project with me.

Jack: Sure.

Sloane: Cool. (starts shimmying)