Inu Kaiba: Happy three months belated birthday, Alice-Chan. It was on February 11th, and well, she's a great friend reading and reviewing my stories about anime she knows nothing about, so this is for you! (And if you haven't already guessed, it's YBYY) Love you Alice-Chan! Insert cute chibi hearts please.
Summary: Love runs a fine line with hatred and is a fickle, fickle thing. And getting mixed up with it was exactly what he did. One-Shot. Darkshipping with hints of SxS, Jou/Mai, and YugiRyou.
Love is a Fickle, Fickle Thing.
I had a problem.
Well actually that was an understatement. I had had a problem for quite sometime now. It wasn't as simple as enough money for a car. It was a feeling, an indescribable feeling that gives me the willies.
Everyone had always told me, this is what love is. It's every describable and indescribable feeling you can, and ever will get. It's the most complete and incomplete thing. It's confusing as can be, and simple as a two piece puzzle. It's everything all rolled up into one and it's supposed to make you happy.
But why am I so miserable? It might be because I fell in love with the wrong person…
Well, I guess it's best to start back at the beginning with something like this.
The first thing I can remember from way, way back is that I always had this strange feeling towards the Pharaoh, the ruler, Atemu. I went on the assumption that it was hate, since I knew I wasn't gay or anything.
I definitely wasn't like those giggly, tanned girls who stood outside the palace day after day, waiting to catch a glimpse of the Pharaoh himself. There always seemed to be a different bunch, and they were all annoying, they were all the same. They acted just like fan girls really.
Thinking back on this issue now, I've come to the conclusion I was probably bi-sexual since no matter how 'fan-girly' those girls acted, it didn't change the fact that they were yummy. Baka Pharaoh. How come he got and still gets all the girls bowing at his feet just because he's yummy and sexy…
Oh we are so not going there Bakura; don't make me want to hurt myself. Wait, that didn't make sense. Fuck it. It's not supposed to make sense when you muse over your feelings.
Damn that Anzu, for fawning all over Yugi all because he had that yu.. What have I told you self… Well damn her for fawning all over that damn baka!
I don't know why, but I found myself deciding I would take the Pharaoh down a notch. Some days, I say it was to find out if he was, well, human. I mean, to see Mr. High and Mighty stumbling all over himself around his lowly crush or because I beat him. The look of shock on his face as that last card seals his face. Damn, I'd love to see that… Or his eyes shine with affection as he tells me how much he l… Stop it Bakura.
And other days, when I'm feeling low, I'll admit I secretly love him, even if only for a second. Because it makes me feel better to think there's a slim chance he might return that feeling… But the feeling isn't there, I don't love him… Well I do… And I don't. God, it's so confusing. Fucking hell, why does Ryou get it so simple!
When I found out about how the Pharaoh had sealed his spirit inside one of the seven scared Millennium Items, I sold my soul to the devil for the chance to get my own soul sealed, so my soul could be in the same room as him, and there was a slim chance if we were both 'brought out' in the same period, I'd get to see him again. And maybe even claim him as my own.
The first time I met him after the sealing, and damn it felt good to get out of that cramped soul room, see the world the 'gorgeous wait what am I thinking I mean bastard' Pharaoh… Getting free was only the first part. Even though I'd spent five thousand years in that blasted place, I still hadn't sorted out everything, including my feelings.
Being out there, finally free did something to me and the next thing I know I was in a duel. But it wasn't a duel with cards; it was a duel with lives. His friend's lives. Man he was sexy, and I'd licked my lips then and did now just thinking about it.
I'd somehow managed to get myself a laptop, and there were the answers to the entire game. I'd cheated, I'd weaseled, and I'd done everything sneaky a Bakura like me could do; a Bakura who wanted to be loved by some one more than his mom. But throughout all those attempts my heart just wasn't winning, and ignoring the figures on the computer, I lost pathetically.
I was the best liar you'll ever see of course. I could fake a smile, a smirk, and just now, complete and utter devestation at the fact that I thought I had lost. I wasn't shocked of course, I'd lost on purpose. Watching the dice break into a million pieces, I felt my heart break with it, and nothing could erase the true pain or the look on my face as I watched them explode.
It was too late. I had lost. And even if it meant he and his friends could live on, I could still feel the fresh pain and bitter hopelessness at losing my last chance to see Atemu, and at that moment I realized the courage he possessed meant he deserved to win no matter what.
I took one last look at him trying to imprint his image in my mind before Ryou took over my body. But it was too late, and the last thing I heard was 'FINAL BIG BANG!' It came from the Anzu character and I watched everything fading into blackness, the Pharoah's stern expression, and calm collected disposition imprinted in my mind as my head hit the table.
I remember the utter struggle through the blackened darkness until I finally came to a door, and suddenly I was out again.
Being free really went to my head because again I was challenging it, this time to something in my area of expertise thank god. He wasn't the King of Games for nothing, but I still had some knowledge around Duel Monsters.
I snuck up on them in a sense and lured the Pharoah out. And god, just seeing him again had done something to me and I wondered if he'd consider sleeping with a lowly tomb robber… BAD BAKURA. I slapped myself.
I challenged him to a duel threatening his friends again, friends I wished I could have. Friends to help me figure this out, friends to set me up with him.
I sealed them in their favourite cards, and the duel commenced. But another loss and another pang to my heart was inevitable.
I didn't care now. I felt something for him, I knew. There was something special about him. And when he looked me straight in the eye to send me to the Shadow Realm; I prayed he hadn't noticed that tiny, sincere smile that had come on my face just from him looking at me. Returning to my soul room, returning to roaming the corridors trying to figure out who I was, who he was, and how I felt about the entire mess. To be haunted again by his stern, solemn expression.
God I was acting like an obsessive girl with a crush, except I wasn't a girl, I was acting more like a confused bi-sexual boy.
The next thing I knew I was outside again, but nowhere near the Pharaoh. I was near one of his friends, that Honda person. Knowing the Pharaoh would never forgive me, if that slim chance of him actually wanting to be with me actually came true… Well he'd never forgive me for letting this kid die when I could have helped him.
So I saved the bloody kid… And well, one thing led to another. And it's hard to remember all these incidences with the Pharaoh because there were a hell of a lot of them after Duelist Kingdom, and that's just me forgetting something terribly important.
The next thing I knew, he wanted to find the damned Kaiba brothers. But really, why should I find Kaiba? I mean, he's not the Pharaoh is he? So why the fuck is he important enough to get rescued, when I don't even know who the fuck he is. Or who he was; at the time. Calm down Bakura. We're not relieving old memories so you can bitch about the part you played in them.
After rescuing Mokuba, or rather his soulless body, it was a fight for who's soul was dominant in this body I was in. Finally, after the Pharoah won his stupid pointless duel, I managed to take control.
Leaving, I headed up to Pegasus' tower to take him down, or rather, win dominance of his Millennium Item. I figured if the Pharoah found out I had two of these things, he might take up a new found interest and realize just how courageous Bakura was. Well, I got the Item.
But it was no use, he didn't even acknowledge my existence this time, and more time passed. Leaving Duelist Kingdom, I sought out Battle City when I heard rumours of the new tournament.
But it led to failure once again, even if I did see his face, and get to duel him once again. I told him this body was important to me, and it was. It was important because each time I regained control I would get to see his face.
And finally after all those times, here I was now. I sure screwed up, didn't I? If I wanted to ever get to know him, I'd fucked it up majorly. There was no way in hell he was gonna love someone who caused him all that trouble, after all he was the Pharoah. High and mighty, Mr. Pompous, I'm so great. Whatever he was, he wasn't going to accept me. And since I was too big to cry, I just buried my head in my pillow and contemplated my misery.
"Bakura… Bakura…" Ryou said, shaking me away.
"Mm." I answered opening one eye sleepily. "What's up Ryou?"
"Well, it's just that we have guests and…" Ryou stood off to the side tugging on the pink frilly apron.
"What? Why didn't you tell me earlier?" I roared, jumping off the bed and hurrying around the room tugging my soiled clothes off and trying to put on new ones as quickly as possible.
"Well Sernity and Kaiba are here.."
"What's up with them?" I said panting and trying to tug my pants on. "Dating or married?"
"Going to get married. Jesus Bakura, you seriously need to stay in the loop or something. Out of all of our friends, the only one's marital status you know is Yami's!" Ryou exclaimed, emphasizing everything with his spatula.
"And is that such a bad thing?" I asked, with my pants halfway on and an evil maniacal grin.
"Oh you…" Ryou said, with a sigh shaking his head. "I give up on you."
Finally after tugging my pants on, I followed him out the door slipping my shirt on as we walked.
"Okay, now Anzu's not involved with anyone right now, so try not to ask her and bring up the issue, it tends to make her… sad. Mai and Jounouchi got together, so treat them as a couple. And Yugi and I are together, so don't group him with someone else. Right, and don't forget Seto and Serenity. Well. I think that'll do." Ryou said with a nod, finishing up his briefing.
I just nodded soullessly, descending the stairs. There he was. Yami, baka Pharoah, the King of Games, gorgeous… Well that was going a bit too far, but it was him.
Now don't trip over your own two feet, just walk over and try not to act like a fan girl. Just…
"H...Hi Yami, can I t…talk to you alone?" I asked mentally smacking my forehead, with realization that I just stuttered and that wasn't a good thing.
I couldn't take it anymore and as Yami nodded and moved over following me, everything about these feelings overwhelmed me.
And before I could help myself, I blurted out "I love you." I automatically winced with the confession, waiting for him to yell at me and tell him there was something wrong with me, or get a swelled ego or something.
"Why Tomb Robber, you took the words right out of my mouth." Yami said with a triumphant smirk.
"Huh?" I asked, pulling my hands off of my head where they'd been to block a kick, just in case.
"I love you too. Does that make sense to you?" He asked curiously.
"Perfect sense." I said with a smile. And then we both inched in, and he kissed me, and I kissed him. And it was everything I thought it would be.
Everyone said I hated him, and I showed it in everyway. But there is a fine line between love and hatred.
And in the end, I ended up loving him.
But who knows, I might feel both… And just not know it.
P.S.: I don't exactly remember the events of Duelist Kingdom, so don't hurt me if I get anything wrong.
Inu Kaiba: And… Cut. Do you love me now Alice-Chan? Was this good enough Darkshipping for you... Or did it suck. x) Well whatever. Just please review and let me know if you liked it. All of you!
