To Be Needed
Part 14
Ashby pulled up in front of her house with Jesse right behind her.
Even though she's only been away from the house for a year it felt like much longer.
"Well this is it. Come on let's find you a room." Ashby said to him once he climbed out of his car and stood on the sidewalk next to her.
Jesse was staring at her house in awe. It was huge. "You own this place?" he asked amazed.
"Yeah. I lived here with my uncle, but when he died he left it to me." She replied.
"Come on, there's plenty of dusting and cleaning we'll need to do. Let's get started." Ashby said as she headed for the front door.
She could hear Jesse groan behind her.
"Aww man! We gotta clean? Can't we just take a blow dryer, I'll modify it so it'll blow more air, and blow all the dust away?" Jesse pleaded as he followed her.
Ashby laughed. "Believe me Jesse if I thought it would work, then hell yeah I'd be all for you doing that. But there are some very delicate things in this house. I don't want anything to be knocked over." She said sensibly.
Jesse gave a sigh. "All right, but we're havin pizza for dinner." He stated.
Ashby smiled. "Yes sir." Ashby said playfully. She unlocked the door and rushed forward to disengage the alarm. She turned and ushered Jesse inside.
"Well welcome to 'McCloud Estate'." She stated, bowing slightly.
"It has a name? Wow, that's so cool. It's kinda like Dom's house. We call it the Toretto house, thou. Well maybe it's different. Can I go look around?" he said excitedly.
Ashby laughed again. Jesse was practically jumping up and down to keep from taking off. "Yeah go explore. I'm gonna go check on a few things and I need to-"
Ashby blinked when Jesse took off running, not letting her finish.
Jesse ran upstairs first. He wanted to see how many bedrooms the house had. His jaw dropped when he saw there were a lot, and each had it's own bathroom.
Something new occurred to Jesse. Maybe Ashby didn't want to live with the team anymore because the Toretto house was too shabby. It wasn't a dump, but compared to the McCloud Estate it wasn't exactly upper class. Jesse frowned in confusion. He didn't understand why Ashby would give up living in her own house to live with the team. Sure Mia asked her too, but Ashby could have just as easily lived in her own house and drove over everyday. Why would she give up this big house to be cooped up in a smaller house with more people?
Jesse's eyes widened in sudden understanding, Ashby didn't need a big house. She needed people to care about. She wanted someone to take care of. She sacrificed her space and time because she knew the team needed it.
Right then Jesse vowed he would make sure Ashby never regretted what she gave up.
"Jesse! Pizza's here!" Ashby yelled into the house. Jesse spent most of the day exploring, as she knew he would. The house was big and needed a lot of time to be seen in its entirety. A few moments later she heard Jesse pound down the stairs. She made a face when she saw how dirty he was.
"Ugh! Jesse, what have you been doing? Go jump in the shower. You are not eating at the table looking like that. I'll bring your bag in from your car." She told him firmly. Shocked by how filthy he was.
"But, Ash the pizza will get cold." He whined.
"Not if you hurry, now go."
Jesse grumbled to himself as he made his way back up the stairs.
Ashby smiled to herself. She went outside to Jesse's car and opened his trunk.
She was struggling with his duffle bag and didn't hear anyone approach her. She couldn't believe how heavy it was. How Jesse managed to carry it was beyond her.
"Need help with that?"
Ashy jumped and turned quickly. She hadn't seen his car out front. She looked up into Vince's eyes.
He seemed unsure as to if he would be welcomed.
"Sure, V," she replied.
He looked relieved and picked up Jesse's duffle with one hand.
Ashby led him into the house. "Can you take that up to Jesse? He's in one of the room's taking a shower." Vince nodded and left.
Ashby went into the kitchen and pulled out paper plates from a cabinet.
Oh god what is he doing here? He's supposed to be mad at me. He can't be here. He can't forgive me. I need him to hate me. Why can't he hate me? I can't do this if he doesn't hate me.
Ashby thought frantically.
Jesse walked into the kitchen and nearly tripped over his own feet when he saw Vince.
"Hey, V. Ash, I'm gonna set up my computer in one of the rooms. Is that ok?" He asked, looking back and forth between Ashby and Vince.
Ashby nodded. She knew he was trying to give her and Vince time alone so they could talk.
Before leaving the room Jesse turned back and looked at Vince. "Try not to say something stupid this time." He warned and then was gone.
Vince blinked in surprise.
Ashby just smiled. She couldn't have loved Jesse anymore in that moment. She would have to remember to do something for him later.
Vince looked at Ashby, who wouldn't look at him. "Ash, I'm sorry. I-"
He started to apologize, but Ashby cut him off.
"V, don't apologize for how you feel. I'd rather you be honest with me than lie. If you're mad, then you're mad. I'm not your girlfriend and you're not my boyfriend. You don't have to answer to me or apologize all the time." She said, softly. Hoping that would get thru to him. They would never get together. Ashby had to make that clear.
Vince frowned. "But I want you to be with me." He protested.
Ashby sighed. "No you don't. You're just use to having me around and having me do things for you. Now I won't because I don't live there anymore. You have to learn to get along without me, V. You've done it before, you can do it now." She told him.
Vince panicked. "I ain't goin back to how it was before. I want how it is now. Jesse's here. I wanna be here too." Not caring he sounded like a child begging to be allowed to do something.
Ashby looked away. She didn't want to start crying in front of him. "I can't let you, V. You don't understand. You keep hoping I'll change my mind, but I won't. I can't let you stay here thinking that there might be a chance, because it will never happen." She said, trying to keep the tears at bay.
Vince was angry. "Why do you keep denying that there's something between us? You feel it. I know you do." He demanded, stepping closer to her, trying to get her to look at him.
Ashby shook her head, still refusing to face him.
Vince didn't know what to do. He's tried so many different ways to tell her.
Maybe I should stop talking and show her. He thought.
Vince stepped closer and reached for her. He held her shoulder in one hand and lifter her chin with the other.
Ashby looked at him scared. "Vince, what are you doing?" she asked.
Vince eyed her mouth. "Something I should have done before." He said and them kissed her.
Ashby was so shocked she didn't moveā¦but then her desire crept in and she pressed her body closer to him.
Vince groaned deep in his throat.
He knew she felt it too. There was something between them. Something different from what he's felt for any other woman. She had to see now. She couldn't deny it any longer.
His arms went around her as he attempted to slide his tongue inside her mouth to deepen the kiss. Suddenly Ashby shoved him away.
"No! I can't. Please V, just go away." She begged him.
Vince stared at her confused. "Why not? There's something there, Ash. Why won't you give us a chance?" He demanded. He was upset and forgot about his reservations of talking about his emotions.
"Because I can't. It won't work. I've only loved one person in my life entire life, only to find out it was all a lie. As soon as he found out I was pregnant he left me here and went off to Stanford university on a four year basketball scholarship. Wanna know why? Because I wasn't good enough! That's why! I can't bare the thought that I won't be good enough for you either. I'm not perfect, even thou you all think I am. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I wasn't good enough for you." Ashby yelled at him thru tears. She turned and ran upstairs to her old bedroom.
Vince watched her go. He understood who that man was at the hearing a week ago. He was the love Ashby was talking about. Vince realized now why Ashby was so afraid to let him in.
She thought she was in love with someone and just when things became complicated and it seemed their love would stand the test, but it failed. She was afraid it would happen again.
Oh Ash, what are we gonna do? We will work. You just need to give us a chance. Vince thought sadly.
Vince stayed that night. He crawled into bed after Ashby fell asleep because he couldn't stand to be apart from her for another night. Even if he had to settle for just sleeping in her bed Vince would take it. If it was the only way to be with Ashby, then he wouldn't give that up. He knew he could make her see that she had to give them a chance. Why spend your life worrying about something that you have no control over? Vince didn't know how he was going to get her to see, but he knew he had to try.
I need her too much to just give up. I can't just give up. She wouldn't give up on any of us. I'll make her see. I'll show her I love her enough and that she will always be good enough for me.
Vince fell asleep, wrapped warmly around Ashby's body.
