"So, any problems installing the camera and bugs?" Hyde asked Fez.

"Please, this is Fez you are speaking to. I know every concealing shadow and closet in that house. Once I even shared the bathroom with Bob and he never knew."

"Cool. Time to turn the channel and catch our favourite program – When Hot Young Chicks Sleepover," Hyde said with a grin.

The monitor was switched on to show an elevated view of Donna's bedroom. Hyde motioned the camera towards the bed.

"Bingo!" The camera showed Jackie and Donna seated on her bed.

"Damn," cursed Kelso. "We were too late to watch them change into their pyjamas!" Hyde frogged Kelso hard on the arm. Just because Jackie was no longer his girlfriend did not mean Kelso was allowed to perv at her naked body.

"Shut up! This is a family show," Hyde corrected. He then proceeded to drink in the sight of the girl he had not been able to banish from his thoughts for the past four stinking months. Had she always looked that beautiful? Or did crushing people's hearts lend an extra shine to the hair? "Turn up the sound!"

"Oh, Donna, it is so great to be sleeping with you again. I get so lonely back East sometimes," Jackie said.

"Oooooooh", moaned Fez and Kelso. Hyde sighed. It was going to be a long night of frogging.

"Well, I can't believe I'm saying this but I actually missed you, Jackie," Donna replied. "Especially now Eric has left, there is no-one to have even a semi-intelligent conversation with anymore. I mean, Kelso and Fez are idiots – "

"Hey!" cried the injured parties.

"And Hyde doesn't say much of anything these days. He used to be good for a heated discussion, especially if you can blame something on the government, but nowadays his vocabulary has shrunk to 'whatever' and 'who took the last beer'."

Hyde frowned at this negative assessment – Hey, he'd always been zen. If he was more zen than usual, that just showed he was doing it right. Then he noticed Jackie's eyes drop and her fingers start to pick at the silken fringe of her dressing gown.

"So, Steven is not very… sociable these days," she offered.

"You could say that."

"He's not sociable then with other girls?"

"Hey, Jackie, I promised I would tell you when that happened, as far as I knew," Donna said reassuringly. "So far no action there."

Hyde's fist balled as Fez and Kelso shrieked with laughter. Perhaps including the two morons in his plan was not the best idea. And what the hell was Donna doing keeping tabs on his love-life. And what business was it of Jackie's if he was banging the women's volleyball team or not. It's not like she cared anymore. Or did she?

"So how is your own romance coming along? Will you and Jason be ordering matching monogrammed bathrobes anytime soon?" Hyde felt his heart stop. Who was Jason?

It was like Jackie read his mind. "Jason? What do you know about Jason?"

"Well, Fez has been swiping the New York society magazines from his beauty salon so we could keep track of you," Donna explained. "You seem to be a pretty popular little debutante, Jackie."

"What can I say? The camera loves me," Jackie replied.

"And we could not help but notice that there was usually the same gorgeous millionaire with his arm over your shoulder in those photos," Donna finished.

Just before Hyde was about to give into his frustration and put his fist through the wall, Jackie said "Oh please, Donna! Jason Featherstone is a complete dork! He doesn't even know the names of the Petticoat Junction girls. And even though his family owns this huge beauty lotions company, he wouldn't know foundation from face powder!"

"Really? So why is he your favourite fashion accessory at every Manhattan club opening and party?"

"My grandmother. She's been pushing us together since I got there. I don't know what she thinks will happen. I mean, I'm not going to marry someone just because he meets all her specifications."

"Marriage? You've only known him a few months. She wants you to marry him?"

"Those are the hints she's been dropping lately. Well, not really hints. More like 'When you marry Jason, you must be sure to fire 20 per cent of the household staff so as to make a good impression.' I don't even argue about it anymore. Smiling and nodding goes a long way in my grandmother's house."

"Still the ice queen, hey?"

"Yes, but I think she is starting to thaw. A couple of months ago I went to our family's Glow Cosmetics Headquarters. Oh, Donna," Jackie breathed with shining eyes "it was so wonderful. It was like if Fez was let loose in the Hersheys chocolate factory!"

"She has read my dream book," murmured Fez.

"Since then I have been spending most of my mornings there, learning all the cosmetic secrets, like how they make all those glorious shades of blush. I mean, just when you thought you had seen every shade of fuschia, they come up with a new one. Magnificent bastards."

"And that is melting the ice?"

"Yes. I think Grandmother sees herself in me, like when she was young. Of course, I'm used to people fantasizing they are me, but this is different. When we talk about make up, the walls come down and we are no longer grandmother and granddaughter, we are like…"

"Friends?"

"Business colleagues. Seriously, Grandmother could not find a friend in Jesus. But she can't help respecting someone who knows their Clairol from their Revlon."

"Well, that's great, Jackie. I know you were having a hard time at first. It sounds like you and your grandmother are really finding some common ground."

"Oh, we are. You know, I was planning on coming home soon," Jackie said. Hyde, whose attention had strayed to the way Jackie's breasts peaked against her satin pyjama top during all the cosmetic talk, now snapped back to attention.

"Really? That's great. About time to return to real life. It's not too late to get into college, you know."

"Donna, I am a beautiful woman – I don't need college," Jackie repeated the old lesson Donna had never learnt. "Anyhow, Jason was starting to look down my blouse a bit too often so I told my grandmother it was probably time I went home and started my modelling career and how I had made some contacts with modelling agencies in Milwaukee. And then – you won't believe this!"

"What?"

"She bought me!"