Disclaimed Everything.

Title: Why Sephiroth REALLY lost his mind.

It was the dead of night. Sephiroth shot up and hit his head on the top bunk. Luckily he stopped the word that he was about to shout at the top of his lungs. Holding his head he got out of bed, muttering to himself "I should have taken that personal room offer."

Then he remembered why he had woken up. He still heard the mysterious sound coming from the hallway. It seemed to be like a strangled cry for help, or a dog drowning in a river.

He decided to see where it was coming from. As he slinked down the hallway saying to himself, "slink, slink, slinking like a cat on the hunt," he found that the sound was coming from the labs. He decided to risk a peek.

What he saw next would forever be burned into his eyes.

Hojo, the brilliant mad scientist, was singing, terribly, at the top of his lungs. But that was only half of the horror. He was wearing almost nothing but his underwear singing "I'm Too Sexy." He was officially drunk.

Sephiroth froze. "This is terrific black mail," thought one part of his brain. The other part killed off the first part and told its owner to kill until the image was gone. NOW!

He chose to run for his life back to his room, find the nearest wall, hit his head against it until he felt dizzy and pass out hoping to forget about the incident.


The next morning Cloud found Him lying on the floor. "Hey Seph," he said, "wakey, wakey, goose eggs and deer bacy." Sephiroth snapped open his eyes, screamed at the top of his lungs and ran to the nearest exit.

"Jeez," said Cloud, "he must have seen a ghost or something."

How little he knew...