Tamarisk didn't know if it was because of Lily, or because witches were just nicer than ordinary girls, but no one was especially mean to her because of her frequent disappearances. She got teased, and her housemates always wanted know where it was she disappeared to every night, but there is no cruelty in their words and she was never excluded from anything. Every evening when she returned to the common room after spending time with Severus in the Owlery, there were inquiries and sly words about what she could be doing and with whom, but no one was unduly malicious. The acceptance helped Tamarisk begin to feel at home that Hogwarts.

She didn't mean to be unsocial or anything, it was just that Tamarisk found it hard to be around so many people all day long. She always had. For the most part choose a quiet introspective girl who didn't find enjoyable to be trapped into a throng of people. She liked being alone, and, in fact, found it strangely tiring to be around her schoolmates. This is why, despite who desire to be liked and to be normal for once, Tamarisk found herself every night inside the Owlery with Severus studying and doing homework.

Even though her housemates still accepted her she'd been right about Lily. After the first night in the Owlery, Tamarisk and return to the Gryffindor common room to find Lily in deep conversation with a girl named Crystal. Two days later, Lily and Crystal were best friends, joined a the hip, and absolutely inseparable.

Luckily, though, Lily didn't freeze Tamarisk out just because she'd been absent the first night. Lily may have been best friends with Crystal, but she still had a space for Tamarisk in her circle. The three girls formed a small group of friends. It wasn't quite that clique as Lily was too all-inclusive to close any one out in something quite as catty, but they definitely had it a partiality for one another. However, Tamarisk could clearly see that although they were friends, Crystal pretty much only put up with Tamarisk suppose it's because Lily liked her.

Tamarisk didn't mind. She had friends at least and she really did adore Lily. Besides Tamarisk didn't mind. After all, she had Severus, who was, as predicted, extremely unpopular. However, he was still appealing to a fellow loner like Tamarisk. Severus was probably her best friend of all, even though he didn't even believe they were really friends. Every day, he acted as if it was the last time they would ever speak to one another. Every day, she asked if he'd meet her in the Owlery the next day and every day he assented even while insisting that she would not be there. Despite his insistence, Tamarisk was there every day, waiting for him. And, ever day, he came.

There was an added benefit to meeting him every day, one besides friendship. School was difficult for Tamarisk; she was continually baffled and confused by ordinary things that the other students took for granted. Sometimes, it took her so long to grasp something as basic as the idea pixies existed, she couldn't remember the spell to help ward them off.

Luckily, Severus understood everything. He really was a smart as he said. While people like Crystal and Sirius could explain the every day realities of being a wizard, it was Severus who help Tamarisk learn and understand the scholarly side. As long as Tamarisk asked the right questions, he was able to explain what she needed to know and what he felt she needed, which was often more in depth and complicated than even the teachers went into. But Severus was a perfectionist, and he pounded information into her head until her fatigued headache was mutated into a different kind of ache.

They took to doing homework together at every night and, with Severus's intense tutoring, Tamarisk began to instinctively understand things that it previously been alien her. Severus may not have been a natural teacher, but he adapted and even what he didn't, Tamarisk have the ability to translate what he was trying to get across.

Very quickly, Tamarisk's favorite class became potions, mostly because that was Severus's favorite. when he talked about it, his eyes would burn and his cheeks would turn pink. He would have an aura about him of excitement and intensity that was missing when they studied something like history and budget or charms.

"It's harder than waiting is stick around and memorizing Latin words," he said one day. "You have to be precise. One teaspoon over what you actually need can ruin a potion. The inclusion of an unknown substance can be disastrous to the outcome. You need to know why the ingredients and mix and react as they do. If you don't you're just a child with a mixing bowl."

"But ... we don't exactly learn the why in class. Just the how."

Severus fixture with the familiar disdainful look. It was the one that cut, that made her squirm as he made her realize she just said something incredibly stupid.

"He teaches as the why," Severus said. "But most people are too caught up in playing around to listen."

Tamarisk felt about two centimeters tall. "I'm not playing around," she said defensively. "Sometimes Sirius and James distract me, yes, but I'm not playing around. I'm trying not to blow anything up. I'm helpless, you know."

His expressions seem to soften minutely. "Well," he said. "You are only mostly helpless."

"I wouldn't be with some tutoring," she said pointedly. "Maybe if you taught me the why, I'd get the how much easier even when the distraction."

Severus looked startled, and then thoughtful. "Very well," he said after a moment's contemplation. "I will."

And he was a harsh tutor, but good and fair. She liked the way he taught, the way he spoke, the way he made complicated puzzles fall open before her so easily.

But it was more than that. It wasn't just that he was a good teacher. Tamarisk liked him because he was quiet and smart and lonely and, to be honest, because he made her feel special.

And it wasn't as if he purposely tried to make her feel special. He could be short and cutting with her. Often, during class, he ignored her completely and would get annoyed if she tried to talk to him. That hurt, even though she knew it was a perspective instinct he just told her his housemates wouldn't understand why he, "tolerated the nattering of a Gryffindor."

But the fact remain at he did tolerate her nattering. She was the only one he did tolerate. Severus was an odd child and an angry one. Within the first two weeks, he'd alienated everyone except Tamarisk. Some, like Sirius and James, had been his adversaries before they even got to school. But the others Severus turned against him by his attitude and arrogance. He could be very mean and had a knack of delivering the perfect insult to absolutely destroy a person, which he seemed to do if anyone got too close. It was as if he didn't even want to give himself the chance of friendship.

"I don't want friends," say he said one day when she'd asked why he was so cruel.

"Why not?" While Tamarisk understood not wanting many friends she didn't quite get not want any friends at all.

He sighed and dipped his quill into the pot of ink they were sharing. "People don't like me. And with good reason. I don't like them, but I'm too different anyway. Life is better this way."

"He's like a textbook case," Tamarisk said that night to Lily. She, Lily, and crystal were in their dormitory sitting on the least bad. Lily was braiding Tamarisk's hair; Crystal was braiding Lily's hair.

"How so?"

"It's like a self-filling prophecy. He thinks everyone is going to hate him so he acts nasty and mean to everyone, so they do hate him." She bit her thumb. "I think he has low self confidence, which is weird because he's so smart. My mom says it's too bad wizards don't believe in psychology, because she thinks she can help him."

"What's psychology?" Crystal asked. She was done with the Lily's hair, so she stretched out on the bed.

"It's like a doctor--I mean a healer--only for your mind instead of your body," Tamarisk replied.

"Oh," she said dismissively. " oh what you spend so much time Snivellrus Snap. He really is horrible. And ugly."

"Well, he's not horrible to me."

"I'm glad he's not," Lily said. "But I'd do you wish you'd study with us instead of him. You've got practically the highest marks in our class."

Tamarisk blushed. "But only because Severus helps me."

Crystal rolled her eyes. "But we're your best friends. You should tell us what he teaches you. Otherwise, it's not fair."

"I'll help if I can, " she said awkwardly.

"Good."

And, just like that, the conversation about Severus was done. Crystal, obviously bored with the topic, started talking about boys and a different guys she had a crush on. That meant it was Tamarisk's turn to be bored. She was always boarded people talked about boys. It was also stupid. All the girls had crushes on the boys and none of the boys showed any interest in any of the girls.

Well, Severus had said Lily was lovely. Maybe he was interested in her. Tamarisk and seen him watching her before, during Potions and once while at dinner. But, then, Lily stood out, so everyone looked at her.

Tamarisk sighed and tried to join in on the conversation. Even though she was more interested in potions or new spells or flying, Crystal and Lily where her best friends. And besides, she was eleven years old now; maybe it was time for her to start getting crushes on boys, too.

"I think James is cute," Lily said.

Crystal smiled wickedly. "All right, now you have to kiss and before Halloween."

"Crystal!" Lily shrieked. Her face turned bright red.

"And I'll kiss Sirius," Crystal said.

"I don't know..."

"It'll be fun! They're both so cute. Don't you want a boyfriend?"

Lily shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe."

Crystal batted her eyes. "Well, try. We'll see if we can do it, but we have to make a pact."

"Okay," Lilly mumbled, hiding behind her hair. "What about Tam?"

Crystal smiled that wicked smile once more. "What about Snivellrus?"

Tamarisk heart lurched at the thought, but Lilly shook her head. "It has to be someone from our house," she said decisively. "And it should be Remus. You like him, right?"

Tamarisk thought about it a moment. She thought about the tall, pale skin a boy with beautiful eyes and sandy blond hair. He was nice enough, always was neat and polite, always respectful even when he and Sirius, James, and Peter were planning do something terribly And those four boys were always getting into some sort of mischief.

"Well," Tamarisk said quietly," Remus is sort of cute."

"All right, it's decided," Crystal said. "You have to kiss them by Halloween or you have to do something horrible."

"Like what?" Tamarisk asked, stomach sinking.

Crystals eyes gleamed evilly. "You have to do whatever the other two say. Agreed?" She held out her pinky.

"Agreed," Lily said, still blushing so hard, her cheeks were the shade of he hair. She linked pinkies with Crystal, then turned her large green eyes on Tamarisk.

Tamarisk didn't want to agree. She didn't want to kiss Remus and she didn't want to have to kiss anybody.

But she didn't want to be left out either. She'd been an outcast unwelcomed and liked at her old school, back at home. Hogwarts was her new home, and she had friends here. She wanted to keep having friends, and if that meant she had the kiss to keep boy, then she would kiss a cute boy.

Heart pounding, she linked pinkies with the other girls and said, in a voice that only shook a bit, "Agreed."