Another attempt fromme to make a fanfic in english, yet I still don't know whether I made an enourmous grammar mistakes or not. Hoped not... Well this is a songfic from a song called Breakaway, sang by Kelly Clarkson. Just a oneshot. Enjoy...
Oh yeah disclaimer... I don't own Rurouni Kenshin nor Breakaway's song.
Grew up in a small town
And when the rain would fall down
I'd just stared out my window
Dreaming of what could be
And if I'd end up happy
I would pray (I would pray)
I ran into my room. My eyes were filled with tears. How could he? How could he taken away my sister?
I stumbled to my futon and fell on top of it. And soon I was crying out loud onto it. Hoping that the softness of the futon would cover my sobs. Vaguely, I could hear my parents cry also. Thought it soon covered with the cried of my baby brother.
Not too long ago, Hagarashi-sama, my landlord had come and took my older sister away. He took her as a payment to my parent's unpaid debt. I didn't know why my parents had to owe to our lecherous-landlord in the first place. All I knew was that he had taken away not only a sister with whom I played and talked with, but also a mother who protected and comforted me during my hard times. Yes, to me she was like a second mother. Since my mother was too busied took care of my little brother and the field, which was own by the landlord.
The rain began to fell outside. I could hear each drops of the rain as it slowly fell and hit the ground. Just like my tears which were slowly fell and hit the futon. I pull my self off the futon, then slowly walked to the door and opened it. I stood at the doorframe, looking outside to the backyard where I used to play with my sister. I still remembered how one day, in that small backyard I helped her to hang the wet clothes that she had been washed earlier. After helping her, we sat exhausted at one of the rocks. She then began to sing or telling me a story about great man who had ability and willingness to change him selves and his surroundings. She always admired their strong will and urge to make changes. She wanted her live to change, to the better one of course. "Someday Sano, I would like to have a life which is better than we had now" she said smiling at me. And when the landlord took her away, she said that maybe this was for the better. Maybe this was the play of Gods hands so that she would have a better life.
The rain started to fall harder. It hit the side terrace and some of the rain splashed at me. Was it really for the better? How can it for the better of her when it meant that she had to leave me. She meant to be with him. But I guessed I was just a little kid who was still egoist and wanting everything to go exactly as I wanted to. The world then had told me that sometimes what you wanted didn't always get along well with what the world offered you. Sometimes you had to surrender to what the world had offered you. When –well had to admit almost all of my life- you fought to make the world go as the way you wanted to be. I just wished my sister now have the better life that she dreamt of cause since that day, I never saw her again.
Will my live change? Or will it just going to end up like my parents? Will someday, the landlord will also going to take me?
As that thought hit me, I felt a strong urge to cry. It's like there was a heavy rock grew in your heart. And somehow by crying, the rock slowly melted and gone away. It's just like flood that once had hit his village. It washed away almost anything from the village. It left nothing but the pack of mud. And when the rain started to get heavier, I started to cry again. Pouring myself out. My legs grew weaker so I slid down and sat at the doorframe. I could no longer looking out. As I cried harder, I pulled my knees up to my body and held –well rather like hugged- it with both of my hand. I putted my forehead in the knees and buried my head there. Crying out loud while unconsciously moving my body forward-backward. Trying to calm my self. I just hope the rain would cover my sobs.
Somehow I saw my future looked as bleak as today.
Trying hard to reach out
But when I tried to speak out
Felt like no one could hear me
Wanted to belong here
But something felt so wrong here
So I'd prayed (I would pray)
I could breakaway
"We don't have anymore rice to eat" said my mom slowly in one evening when my father and I had just came back from the field.
My father sighed. His eyes turned to sad. "Is that mean, we couldn't eat rice today?"
My mom nodded.
"So what do we have for dinner?"
My mom bit her lips. Still bowing her head, she said "Only a fish and a miso soup."
"A fish for four of us?"
She nodded again.
"Well we don't have any other choices, do we?" He tried to smile as if a smile would mean a dozen bowl of rice.
But my stomach suddenly growled. A signal that I starved to death. My parents looked at each other. Their faces grew paler. I was so ashamed of my stomach so I just stood there with my face red of embarrassment, looking down at the ground and holding my stomach so it would not growled again.
Then I felt my father hand reached out to me. He rumbled my hair slowly and chuckled. "Okay, you could have half of the fish because your brother will need another half of it".
He then led me inside the house and sits me in the table next to my half-sleeping brother. My mother took out the fish and the miso in the kitchen while my dad helped her. Then I heard my mom whispered, "We need to borrow some more money from Higarasha-sama". And my dad helplessly nodded
I got angry hearing what my mom had to say. The last time they borrowed some money from the landlord, my sister had to be taken away from me as a payment. And judging from our current condition, we didn't have anything left to be regard as a payment. We were just starting to plant the shield so we won't be expecting it to harvest until 3-4 months later. With what will we pay the landlord?
"Don't borrow anymore money from Higarasha-sama dad" I said bowing my head deep as we all now sat. I saw my mom's hands suddenly stopped from cutting the fish into two half.
There was silence after I said those line. I couldn't see their faces but I assumed that by now they were looking at each other and trying so hard to found an excuses for me.
"We don't have any other choices," said my dad. And my mothers started to cut the fish again.
She putted one half into my empty bowl.
I sat quietly but then shove my bowl which was now filled with half of fish to the center of the table. "I don't mind being hungry"
Again, silence filled the room.
"We need the money Sanosuke. Even if you don't mind being hungry, your brother will"
I looked at my baby-brother who was sitting on my mother's lap.
"But how will we ever going to pay for it?" This time I glare at my father. Demanding an answers.
"We'll figure it out later," said my father weakly. Not bother to put an optimistic face anymore.
"The last time you said that, neechan had to be taken away by Higarashi-sama" Still glaring at my father. Only this time I also look at him sharply.
Surprisingly, my dad slammed the table. Startled me and my mom, and made my baby-brother started to cry. "You kid know nothing about it. So just shut-up. Shut up and eat your fish"
"We don't have any other choices Sanosuke," said my mom weakly while comforting my baby-brother.
Rage boiled inside of me. This wasn't right. I've already heard the other villager's story about how lecherous the landlord was. Yes he will borrow you some money. But he will doubled the loan every passing month if you were not paying it back. Not to mention, the tax that we had to pay. And when the debts and taxes were long overdue, he could just take anything he wanted from you. Like the last time he was taking my sister away. And now I couldn't believe my dad wanted to borrow money from the same person who had taken his girl away.
"This isn't right! He's blackmailing us! You shouldn't ..."
"Sano please. Just leave this problem to me and my father. Now please eat and then you could have a shower and go to bed" My mom cut my ramble with a soft yet stern voices.
I stood and look down at the table in front of me. "I'm not hungry anymore"
So again, my dad has another debt to Higarashi-sama. I hated my father for that.
How could he do that? What else would the landlord took from us? I should do something. Something to safe my family's live. But what?
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky
I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
"Nobody owns you. Not even the landlord. All men are equal. The landlord is just lucky enough to be born in the rich family who own this land. But just because he's rich and own this land, doesn't mean he could do everything he please to us." said a tall man in an army suits.
Not to long ago, that man had come to release Hoshi-san who was been tied up in the middle of the village as a punishment from Higarashi-sama for not paying his debt and taxes for over 6 months. Some of the villagers had restrain him for releasing Hoshi-san, feared by the Higarashi-sama punishment but that man stood straight in front of Hoshi-san who was now lying breathless on the ground.
"But he gave us land and place to live and work. I guess that'll give him a right to implement taxes. Consider that as the rent-money" said one of the villagers. Others were nodding. Agreeing him.
"True. But still that doesn't give him a right to punish you or to even kill you for not paying taxes. You are human for god sake. So he must treat you like human not like an animal like this!" He increased his tone. He's getting impatient with the villager's remark.
Unlike the others, I found his word true. Finally after few years tried to found a good reason why I hated Higarashi-sama so much, he provided one to me. I gathered all of my courage and shouted to the all villagers, "It's true. Not to mention that now is not a good month for harvesting or planting. So where would we get the money to pay the tax?"
And they're all looking at me. Surprised by my comment. I knew they knew that I'm right but they just won't admit it. They were scared by what the landlord would do to them if he knew this.
"Well I see that finally I could get someone understand" said the man. He walked slowly to me. He touched my shoulder lightly. "Tell me young men, what is your name?"
"Daidoji Sanosuke"
"Well Daidoji Sanosuke, it seems you have a pretty good brain and hearts compared to others. Why don't you join us and together we will fight this injustice around the Japan?"
I looked up to him. Not understanding his words or his requests. Join them? Join what? Who is he? And who are they?
"Oh and let me introduce my self. My name is Sagara Souzou. I'm the captain of Sekihoutai"
And so I joined his troops and together we were fighting the injustice throughout Japan. I left my family in the village. I had a fight with my father since I joined the Sekihoutai. He disapproved with me joining the Sekihoutai. To him, Sekihoutai was just a rebellion army who would never win the battle. Fighting the landlords was only a dream. They got all, while we didn't have a thing. So how will Sekihoutai win the fight? It's all nothing but a crap. So I leave my home and swore that I'll never return before I prove him wrong.
My father prediction soon became reality. As we tried to gain more power and people, we also gained more enemies. Our enemies were the landlords who felt threatened by our presence. So they spread rumors about Sekihoutai. They said that Sekihoutai was nothing more like a pirate. Instead of freeing villagers from the feeling of scared, they said that Sekihoutai would come to the village and took all of the villager's treasure. Somehow the villagers bought that. And so they set a trap on Sekihoutai and kill all the army. Somehow I managed to escape. Though I wish I wasn't survived since by surviving, I had to saw Captain Sagara's head off from his body. And from that moment on, I hated everyone who claimed them selves as an imperialist. The government, the landlords and all the authorities that thought them selves superior. I hated them and I swore that someday I would have the revenge for whatever they had done to the Sekihoutai, especially to Captain Sagara. And to honor him, I took his last name and changed my name to Sagara Sanosuke.
Wanna feel the warm breeze
Sleep under a palm tree
Feel the rush of the ocean
Get on board a fast train
Travel on a jet plane
Far away and breakaway
After Sekihoutai gone, I found my self wondering alone in the street. By that time, money could be a tricky requirement. I refused to work for the imperialist as their army. Instead, I became street fighter since fighting was the skill that I mastered the most. For years, I lived my life as a street fighter. Being called as Zanza and feared by people. Wherever I go, people would go away from me as if I was a plague or something. Well I had to say, maybe it's only because I held my Zanbatou. My long and heavy sword that made of solid rocks. I felt so ... powerful every time I held Zanbatou. No one will ever defeat me.
Well not for long...
Not until Kenshin broke it. Yes, he broke my Zanbatou and defeated me. But he didn't kill me. Instead he let me live and told me that I should use my live and skill to helped others who weaker than me. And the strangest thing happen, I became friend with the one who had defeated me.
I didn't know what's wrong with me... But I found happiness in my choices. Now I had friends which I regard as my family. I had someone to fought-with not to fought-against.
I'll spread my wings and I'll learn how to fly
I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky
I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget all the ones that I loved
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
But the past still haunted me. The police hadn't dropped the case back in my hometown when I had attacked my landlord. After all that I did for my country, they still suing me for things I did 10 years ago. I had enough with this country and all its corrupted people. They were so ungrateful. So instead of facing the punishment, I ran from Japan. Leaving all of my friends behind. Hoping I could get more friends, more money, more experienced and more of everything on my journey to conquer the world.
Let the world know who Sagara Sanosuke is.
Buildings with a hundred floors
Swinging around revolving doors
Maybe I don't know where they'll take me but
Gotta keep moving on, moving on
Fly away, breakaway
So I travelled all around the world. Visited many places. Seeing new things. Met many new people. Making many new friends. Learned many languages. Adopted many thinking which in turn making me change in a great deal. Others even said it had me more mature, physically and mentally.
But I never felt satisfied. I felt something missing. Something that made me never felt completed or contented. I felt something was waiting for me. Somewhere, someplace and someone were waiting for me. So I guess, I just gotta keep moving on and moving on.
I'll spread my wings
And I'll learn how to fly
Though it's not easy to tell you goodbye
I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway
Out of the darkness and into the sun
But I won't forget the place I come from
I gotta take a risk, take a chance, make a change
And breakaway, breakaway, breakaway
A tall man standing on the secluded side of Tokyo harbor. He wore a western clothes that looked perfect on his tall and muscular body. Though from the reflection of his face, we still could clearly knew that he was a Japanese. He strolled on that secluded dock which only small ship docked. The beach was pretty shallow so there was no big ship could dock there. He seemed to reminiscing something from his past. His walk came to stop on the edge of the dock. He stood there with his hand on his pocket. A breeze blew his brown hair onto his face. He ignored it for his gaze has gone off into the deep blue sea.
"You'd come back," said a woman with a long black hair standing couple of feet behind him. The man looked back to see who was coming.
Megumi
He was so lost in thought that he didn't hear her walking. He smiled, a faint one, before letting his gaze back to the ocean and then simply nodded as an answers.
"What bring you back after all this year?" There was a slight of sarcasm in her voice. Yet he also traced a bit of sadness there.
The man smirked. Still looking out in the deep blue sea, "Che kitsune, do you miss me that much?"
Yes damn it. I miss you that much. You damn rooster.
"What make you think that I miss you?" she asked cynically. Stealing a glance to his well-builded figured.
And do you miss me too?
He smiled even wider. "Do you?"
"I ask you first. Why do you have to...?"
"I miss Japan. I miss the air that I breathe now. I miss the view. I miss the people. I miss Kenshin and his 'oro' remark. I miss Kaoru and her short-tempered emotions. I miss Yahiko and I couldn't wait to pursued him all over the dojo like we usually did. And of course I miss the dojo too." He looked slightly to her. "Tell me how are they? And how is the dojo?"
He didn't miss me. He doesn't miss me. And he probably would never miss me.
She gulped. 5 years waiting and missing him and he didn't miss me at all. I ran all the way here. Couldn't wait to see him. And now he was asking how the others doing while he's gone. What am I to him?
"Dojo is fine. Kaoru had more pupils now. I think they're all in dojo right now. Why don't you go there? It's lunchtime. I believe they still had an extra food to be given for a free-loaders like you". She had no idea how she managed to found a courage to say all of those thing without even whimpering.
Still smiling. "Oh I'm not looking for a free meal. As a matter of fact, I'm thinking of having lunch in Akabeko."
"And making another debt to the poor Tae?" she asked cynically.
"Oh yeah Tae, how is she anyway? Still running the Akabeko with Tsubame?"
Why is he asking about anyone? Why isn't he asking about me?
She's getting impatient with him. "They're fine. Look rooster, I had to go. It's nice to see..."
"Where are you going?" he felt a little disappointed by her remark.
"Hmmm. I have to go back to the clinic and see doctor Genzai."
And maybe after that I could quickly pack my belonging and head back to the Aizu. I'm only wasting my time here. It's obvious that he didn't miss or even care about me.
"Why? Is my presence bothering you kitsune?" the smile has gone from his face and replaced by a stern face.
She looked at him and found that he also looked at her with a sharp gaze. She saw a bit of anger in his eyes.
Why should he be angry? It's me who should be angry because he had leaved me without even saying goodbye.
"Your un-presence for 5 years had bothering me more, so why your presence now have to bothering me?" She looked back in anger. Yet he smiled in return.
Stupid mouth. Now he knows that I miss him so much. Damn!
"Guess you miss me after all"
"Suit your self. I'm not the one who said it," She said quickly. She put the bored face.
He laughed and she felt stupid. So stupid.
Then he turned around and walking away from the dock. "Come on kitsune, I treat you lunch."
She stood in awe. "You, treat me a lunch?"
He stopped and looking back at him. "Yes. Don't worry I had money"
She still didn't move. "You had money?"
"Yes. Are you coming?" he asked rather impatient.
She still stood there. Patient was a trait that he lacked of and she knew it better.
"Oh come on kitsune." he took her hand and half dragging her away.
They soon were walking together. He walked couple of feet behind her. She had insisted of walking first and showed him the way since there were so many things that had changed in this town that he sometimes lost his own way around the city. He smiled at the states they were in now. It's like the old days when he used to escort her back to her house, well Doctor Genzai's clinic to be precise.
"Just like the old days" he said causing her to stopped and looking back at him.
She tilted her head. "Old days?"
"Yeah the old days. When I used to walked you home." He smiled to her.
She forced herself to smile back. "Yeah like the old days" she said rather bitter before resumed walking. He followed.
"You know who I miss the most?" he asked while still walking behind her.
Oh God please. Not this 'miss' topic again.
She took a deep breath. "No"
"You" he said calmly.
She stopped walking and so did he? "What?" Still not looking back at him.
"You" he repeated again calmly.
"Me what?" she finally turned around and questioned him.
He smiled. A bit nervous. "I said you are the one whom I miss the most"
"You miss me?"
"Well let face it. It's not easy to find a girl who had the ability to fight back my words. To challenge me in every single word. Not to mention that this girl is also had a brilliant brain and beautiful heart that could take any man's breath away"
She was, by now, felt like a balloon floating in the sky. He misses me. She looked back at him who was now grinning at her.
"It's that all?" she grinned back.
"!" Was she teasing me?
"It's that all you see in me? So am I not great looking too? Or you want to say that I look so god damn ugly that it haunted you every night in your sleep?" She said teasingly. Trying to eased up the situations
He laughed. Darn right she teases me "Well woman, you couldn't have it all, could you?"
Her cheek turned red and she smile but this time a genuine smile which made Sano's heart forgot to pound for a second.
She resumed walking and he followed. This time he walked besides her.
"I'm sorry kitsune," he said still looking ahead and walking.
She looked slightly to him. He looked very nervous. This is must be something he uncomfortable to talk to. He never felt comfortable talking about his feelings.
She looked back ahead. "Sorry for what? For leaving me for years?"
"Yes. But especially for not saying goodbye to you."
And she stopped walking. Memories rushed back to her. She remembered how sad she was when he had gone without saying goodbye to her. He said goodbye to all the people in dojo, yet he didn't said goodbye to her. She felt sad, down and neglected. She remembered when Kenshin decided to go Edo, Kaori was the one he said goodbye to, because he cared so much of her. She felt something going on inside her and her eyes started to cloud. She bit her lip. Tried to hold back the tears.
"Why?" she asked very slowly but Sano heard it. He stopped walking and now stood straight with his back in front of her.
"Because I found it hard to say goodbye to the person whom you care most"
Why?
But she remained silence and not answering him. Well it's not like he was asking a question to her anyway.
"I was afraid, maybe, because goodbye seems to means that I will never seeing you again. Ever again. And I don't want that" he said nervously and still not looking back to her. She knew perfectly well that he must be feeling rather embarrassed saying things like that. And somehow she just glad that he was willing to felt embarrassed and talking about his feeling to her. She really appreciated it.
She smiled then walked toward him. She held his hand to her own. He, of course, felt surprised and looked back in question. What are you doing woman?
She looked up to him and smiled widely. "Well now you see me again"
His heart felt warm when he heard her and saw her smiles. He was afraid that she would be angry with him and his remark, but thanked God she's not. In fact, she seemed to understand him more.
They were smiling to each other without saying a word. Looking at each other's eyes and somehow found the answers only by the looked they shared.
"So, are we still going to have lunch in Akabeko?" Still had his hand held in hers, he squeezed it.
"Of course. It's not everyday that you found Sagara Sanosuke treating you a lunch"
And so they walked back together. Only this time they had their hand entwined and smiles plastered on their face.
So... How is it? Tell me what do u think bout my story. RR pls...
