Chapter 1.5

Everyone thinks I'm so nice, so sweet and innocent. Even my best friends. They don't know what kind of life I had before Hogwarts, what kind of person I am. I wish I could tell them, but I'm afraid of losing them. I know, intellectually, that my fear is idiotic, but I can't help it. I know that my friends would love me regardless, but I can't get past the 'what if?' that lives in my heart.

I was prepared to keep that part of my life locked away forever, but I don't think I can anymore. This is my last year at Hogwarts. I've kept my secrets for so long, why won't they just stay away? This is all because of him. The one person in my life that I've tried to stay away from, tried to keep as far from me as possible, and now I have to see him every day for the next year.

Why did I have to open the door? Why did I have to see him? Why couldn't I have just walked away?