Sixteen Seconds

By Lyo (with help from Meirelle)

Disclaimer: Ronin Warriors is the property of Bandai, Sunrise. No profit is being made in the use of these characters.

Notes: For the sake of the fic, we are going to pretend that the Ronin Warriors do really (mostly) understand English. Sorry. Other notes are at the end of the fic.

Summary: The year is 1996, and Rowen Hashiba has found a deadly foe on a trip to New York. It's a battle 4 to 1, and this is a battle where there can be no winner.


Cye Mouri sighed. It was raining. He was in New York City, in a hotel room—without a fish tank, without an umbrella, his leg was broken, and without anything else to do but flip through the coffee table book on the different sorts of toilets one could find in the world. It was an interesting reading.

The others were out sightseeing. This "reunion/we-are-22-and-really-lame-without-girlfriends" trip was Kento's brainchild, and, like all Kento-brainchildren, it was a disaster. Sage's luggage was currently in Paris and not New York, Ryo was huffy that White Blaze was not allowed onto the plane, and Mia had taken over as the "event-coordinator" when Kento realized no one cared what he thought, which meant they were now lined up for shopping, shopping, and more shopping. He had never been so glad to fall down an overly polished set of stars.

He put the book down again. The toilets in Italy weren't so interesting anymore.

Cye picked up the remote control to the television and began to flip through the channels. There wasn't much to be found: a few re-runs of a woman who lived in a bottle, a tale of seven cast-aways, five children combining to form a blue man with green hair (he turned that one off simply because it was eerily similar to the Inferno), and a few generic cartoons for small children.

And then he found it. And it was good.


"Yuli," Ryo Sanada called as the fourteen-year old boy threw the hotel room door open.

"Fuck you, Ryo," Yuli snarled. He threw his wet jacket on the pristine white, hotel room carpet and stomped off to the room he shared with Sage and Rowen. There were mud tracks from his shoes, and Ryo could almost hear Kento ranting about the security deposit he'd put down on the place, and how he didn't want to take Yuli in the first place because not everyone gets to have the calming influence of having to save the world at fourteen, and then Rowen would chime in about Freud or Jung or something that had nothing to do with anything and only proceeded to make Ryo feel dumb.

"Well, fuck you, too," Ryo yelled back before he realized that the television was on, and he could see Cye's blue-casted leg sticking out from the couch. "Sorry, Cye," he mumbled and shucked his own shoes onto the plastic mat by the door.

"Uh-huh," Cye replied. The television was on, soft so it wouldn't disturb the still-sleeping Rowen who didn't seem to think a trip to America was any reason to alter his sleeping schedule.

Ryo walked into the small kitchen area and pulled a bottle of water from the fridge. "I sorta embarrassed him. We were in Central Park—and White Blaze would have loved Central Park—and there were these two American girls that came up to us and started speaking in Japanese. It was pretty terrible, lots of 'chans' and stuff."

"Uh huh."

"Yeah. So, anyway, Yuli's all talking to them in Japanese slower than anything, and then they start asking him about me, and they kept calling me a demon instead of 'older brother,' so I interrupt them and try to correct them, and then they give me this whole 'Ew. Scary-old-stalker-man' look."

"Uh huh."

Ryo sat down beside Cye. "So, of course they begin to wander off, and he gets real pissed and tries to stomp off. He ended up slipping in the mud in front of the girls, and they cracked up because he got this huge mud-stain across his ass," Ryo's voice trailed off as he looked up at the television.

Yuli started his tape player.

"Hey, Cye," Ryo asked. "Can you turn that up?"


Sage Date exhaled once before he pushed open the hotel room door. It was raining harder than he thought it could in America—aside from Seattle. After Kento's slip-up with his luggage, he was left with Mia's poor excuse for "medium hold" hairspray, and now his hair was plastered to his face and neck. He felt sure that he looked like a drowned tourist rat—especially since his t-shirt has the wonderful "I Heart New York" plastered across it.

He sipped his latte—the only truly wonderful thing that he had managed to get on his and Mia's excursion to Times Square—and walked into the room.

The television was battling for dominance with Yuli's tape player, so loud that Cye and Ryo didn't look up when he bustled past with ten bags in one hand.

Yuli was sprawled across the floor on his make-shift bed with a rather revolting brown stain across the seat of his pants. Kento had planned for Yuli to sleep with Ryo, but the teenager had the nerve to act like a teenager and refuse to sleep in the same room as his former role model.

"Hi, Yuli," Sage said as he threw purchases onto his own bed.

"Hey." Yuli waved one had up at him.

Rowen shifted and pulled a pillow over his head. "Rvrrr," he mumbled.

"Fuck off, Rowen," Yuli snapped.

Sage smiled. "Rowen, it's almost one. Just get up."

His friend sat up and looked at Sage as if there was something growing out of his wet hair. "No." He threw a pillow at Yuli and rolled over again.

"Dude, X-Japan is awesome." Yuli threw the pillow back. "Besides, I can't hear over their animal shit in the living room."

Sage frowned. "Yuli, don't talk to us that way."

"Fuc—"

The former warrior of Halo threw one of his own pillows at Yuli and sipped his latte again. "Unless you want to sleep in Kento and Ryo's room, you will stop it."

"Ha," Rowen said sleepily.

Sage rolled his eyes and went back out in the living room. "Hi, guys."

"Uh huh," said Cye.

"Cool," said Ryo.

The blond raised an eyebrow. "Yuli asks that you turn it down. Rowen, too."

"Yeah. Okay," Ryo said, but neither he nor Cye reached for the remote.

Sage's eyes flicked over to the screen just as the narrator announced, "The white spotted deer is indigenous to many areas of the American North East." He walked around the couch and sat down on the other side of Cye.

"Deer are boring," Cye murmured. "Sage, can you get me something to drink?"

Sage handed him the latte. "Keep it."


"Here, Kento, just one more," Mia said, and she put another box of old on top of the other four before tipping the taxi driver "There."

Kento Rei Fuan raised his eyebrows. "Couldn't you have gotten Sage to do this? He went with you."

The woman smirked. "Sage saw me heading towards the used book store and mysteriously vanished to go fight evil."

"Ah." He blinked. "Sage is a bastard."

Mia grabbed her very small handbag and tapped him on the arm with it. "Sage is just smarter than you."

He nodded and began maneuvering the boxes into the hotel and towards the elevator. "That's why he's a bastard."

Mia just shook her head as the seconds ticked by. They got on the elevator, and Mia hit the button for him because she wasn't evil. He hadn't realized that books could get this heavy. Sure, he'd helped Rowen move into his new apartment, but Rowen never saddled him with five boxes of books that were going to have to be shipped to Japan and thus need to be lugged back down stairs.

"You're a peach," Mia said airily in English as the elevator doors snapped open. She walked maddening slow in front of him. "How was your Uncle?"

"He's doing well. Business is good. Fed me some, and showed me where I could find some hokey tourist things for Cye." He looked around the boxes. "He's very depressed that he cannot add to his 'Famous Places' collection of tacky fish."

Mia shook her head and unlocked the apartment door for him, holding it open. "Of course. He loves to pack them away in newspaper in the bottom of a box so they'll never see the light of day."

Kento set the boxes in just inside the door, facing the growing pile of shoes. He added his own to the pile. Yuli had already destroyed the carpet with his own, bratty New York mud. "See, you know he loves me," he quipped. He looked up after putting his wallet down on the kitchen counter that separated the main room and the kitchen. The television was on. "Right, Cye?"

"Uh huh," the older man said.

Mia laughed and began to walk to her room. "Kento is going to marry you, Cye."

"Uh huh."

Ryo snorted from the general couch area. "Can I wear the pink dress?" He did sound distracted though.

"What's up, guys?" Kento came around the couch and dumped the contents of his bag at Sage's feet. The blond only kicked the few tacky China Town fans off his socked feet, shifting. "I got you a beautiful purple-popsicle-stick carp, Cye. I was going to get you the tiger-shark, but I didn't want to relive the Sea Monkey incident." He held the prize up to Cye.

"Uh huh," Cye murmured.

Sage kicked at the stuff again. "Hey, Kento, look at the turtles."

"Yeah, Kento," Ryo echoed in a sort-of zombie voice. "They're awesome."

Kento glanced up as a large tortoise made its way across the screen. "Dude, that's not a turtle. That's a tortoise."

"Uh huh."


"Do nothing but cry, day and night," Yuli warbled, and this time Rowen got out of bed. He carefully placed the pillow in his hands, and he waited just for the right moment when drums and guitars reached their zenith before pouncing and slamming the pillow over the teen's face.

"I was trying to sleep, damn it," he snapped. "Show respect for your elders. Don't you get any of what Sage is always telling you?"

The boy thrashed beneath him.

"I will kill you if you wake me up again," Rowen said, voice calm. "Do you understand?" Yuli nodded, and he rolled off the teen. "Glad we had this chat."

"You're a bastard," the boy breathed, and Rowen chose to ignore the comment as he proceeded to get dressed. It wasn't his style to attack over-angsty and rebellious youths, but he could make the exception for Yuli when the boy decided that 2:45 was a good time to squawk out X-Japan songs.

He buttoned his shirt. It was almost 3 o'clock, and Sage would come in and wake him up if he dared sleep a smidge past that. There was no point in sleeping anymore, but he needed to scare Yuli. All things worked out for the best; the ends justified the means.

"Can't you stay up late like any other self-respecting teenager?" Rowen asked as he ran a hand through his blue hair. "Then you'd be asleep, and I wouldn't have to hear 'Delia—'"

"'Dahlia,'" the teen interjected.

"X-Japan, then." Rowen rolled his eyes. "You'd still be asleep."

Yuli flopped onto Sage's crisply made bed and crunched a few shopping bags as well as leaving an impressive mudstain on the pristine fabric. "Well, let's see. I keep Sage awake if I'm in here when he's sleep, so I'd stay out in the living room, but Cye won't let me stay out in the living room past 11:30. Says it's not good for me." He frowned. "He's a bastard, too."

"And a hypocrite. Cye and me used to stay up 'til 2 some nights." Rowen sighed and shook his head. "Guess you can't blame him in his old age."

Yuli cracked a very small smile.

"All right. I'm gonna go brave the gauntlet." Rowen fiddled with his hair before opening the door. "Please keep your muddy ass off my bed."

"Can do." Yuli's smile got a little wider. "Since you asked so nice."

Rowen smirked and walked out into the living room. There were boxes of books by the door, and no one was making lunch. The other four were seated on and around the couch, eyes transfixed to the television screen as the narrator boomed on about the importance of tortoise conservation.

"Hi, guys."

"Cool," said Ryo.

"Uh huh," said Cye.

"Shut up," said Kento.

Sage blinked.

Rowen raised his eyebrows and turned to the television. A dowdy tortoise helped itself across the screen. It was a rather large tortoise and a nice shade of brown but rather unremarkable in all other aspects. "What are you watching?"

"Animal Planet," Sage, Ryo, and Kento replied.

He blinked. "Uh, huh."

"Uh huh," Cye echoed.

Rowen blinked and walked behind the couch. "Is this any good?"

"Rowen," Sage said, his tone hushed and warning.

He rolled his eyes and watched the end of the program with them. The rather unremarkable traits of the tortoise were mirrored in the quality of the program, and he couldn't help but groan when the tortoise documentary ended for a "Species of the Amazon Basin" mini-documentary event.

"Can we change the channel?"

"No," Ryo snapped. "This is cool."

Rowen frowned and then glanced at the oldest member of the group. "Cye?"

"Uh huh."

"Can we change the station?"

Cye blinked twice and turned to glare at him. "Bug off, Rowen."

He slumped against the couch. "But this is so stupid."

"Your face is stupid," Kento snapped.

"Shut up, Kento," Rowen replied.

The other man stood up. "Your face needs to shut up."

"Shut up, Kento," Sage and Ryo yelled, and the blond tried to shove Kento out of his line of sight.

"Ha," declared Rowen.

"Shut up, Rowen." The other four spoke in perfect unison. It was an effective example of brainwashing.

He frowned and tapped his fingers on the faux-leather couch. There was a commercial break, and Kento walked toward the fridge. "Anybody want anythi—"

"Water," Cye said, and he handed a fancy, coffeehouse cup to Sage with a withering look. "Have you ever heard of sugar, mate?"

Sage rolled his eyes. "Rowen, why don't you go back to sleep? We'll wake you up before the aquarium."

"We're going to another aquarium." Rowen shook his head. "I like fish, but I thought there was only one of those—"

"It's a very special aquarium, purely tropical fish from Australia," Cye explained. "Come on, these are important fish."

He frowned.

Sage gave him a hopeful smile. "Well, they might have a whale shark. You've never seen a live whale shark, right?"

Rowen blinked and felt a smile beginning to form. "No, I've never seen a whale shark."

Cye scoffed. "Sage, do you know how big a whale shark is?" He rolled his eyes and took the glass of water when Kento came back in with a beer and offered glass. "This is a small aquarium. Only small fish."

The smile vanished. The program was back, and it was the Amazon Dolphin. He'd seen one of those before, so this was a pointless show. "Can we change the station?"

"No!" Ryo smacked him with a pillow.

He frowned. "What if the Dynasty attacks?"

Kento sat back down on the floor, at Ryo's feet this time. "If the Dynasty attacks, we'll deal."

"Not to mention that they haven't so much as hiccupped in years," Ryo muttered. "Make yourself useful and get me a beer."

"Fuck you, Ryo," Rowen spat and turned his back on the offending television. Mia's door opened, and he fell to the floor. "Look, it's Saranbo! He's back!"

His feeble attempts were met with Mia yelling and several more pillows.

"Rowen. Shut. Up."

"I wonder if Lady Kayura ever gets told to shut up," he retorted, pushing his hair from his eyes and glanced around the room.

"The Amazon Dolphin is kind of ugly," Sage observed.

Rowen's eyes settled on Kento's wallet, sitting out, on the counter. "I'm going out."

No one responded as he slowly stood up and walked to the wallet. He supposed thirty dollars would cover it.

"I think the Amazon Dolphin is sort of like the sped of the dolphin world. Its head is all bulbous." Kento laughed. "What's the narrator saying?"

"Nothing important," Ryo dismissed.

"And all dolphins have bulbous heads," Cye snapped in a snooty voice.

Rowen pocketed the offending wallet and went to put on his shoes.

"Why is that one pink?" Ryo asked. "It looks sort of—"

"Gay," Kento interrupted.

Cye sighed. "Because they have it in a little tank."

"So it turns pink when it's pissed off?"

Rowen took an umbrella. "So, I'm leaving. I have Kento's wallet, and I'm going to Starbucks. They have nice lattes and scones and stuff." He grabbed the spare card key and dashed for the elevator, counting down in his head.

He added three seconds for the fight and five for the television program. Five more since he was fairly certain only Sage knew about Starbucks, and then three because they'd have to put on their shoes to chase him. All in all, the sixteen seconds were ample to call the elevator and begin to dash down the stairs. Kento would smell the trick, but he'd be out of the hotel by then.

Rowen Hashiba exited the hotel in precisely forty-nine seconds and easily blended into the bustling, mismatched crowd of New York City. The others were still sixteen seconds behind, and he almost felt bad for them.


1. Kento's name, for this fic, is Kento Rei Fuan, meaning that Kento is his last name, due to Chinese order, and Rei Fuan is sort of a girl first name, so yeah. In addition, it's that way in the OAV.

2. There is no need for Runa to be mentioned at all. She has no place in this fic. It's been like six years, and, well, yes.

3. "Do nothing but cry, day and night" is a line from X-Japan's song, Dahlia.

4. This is a prime example of going a long, long way to preserve a joke. My roommate and I decided that everyone but Rowen watched Animal Planet, and I decided to write a fic about it. However, then we realized that Animal Planet didn't start until 1996. Then I remembered that it didn't matter when because they were in Japan. So, now they're in New York in 1996. sheepish grin

5. If Talpa would have used Animal Planet to conquer the mortal realm, the ronin warriors so would have lost.