Hey everyone I'm back. Have had a horrible day but I'm not gonna bore you with my probs! Also had a 'Conner' moment, whole 'foot in mouth' thing (my friend walked in to the room I took one look at her skirt and said "Are you wearing a tablecloth?"! She was less than impressed!)

Syrem: Please don't cry or feel bad! This chapter might make you feel better - or worse! I'm not promising anything! Also I can't read your next chapter on Hidden Love cos my school comps have blocked it. Any bad words in it!

Jnr Cpl Scarlett: Not quite over yet!

CamFan4Ever: No one's going to be kissing anyone - I was just telling Crimson-Ranger that!

And speak of the devil - Crimson-Ranger: NO!

Evil Slash Piranha: As you can see it is me!

Well enough with that, on with the story! Here's chapter 18... (don't forget to review!)


"Hey, Hunter. How about we go down the track this afternoon?" Blake said to his brother. The others looked up expectantly. Hunter hadn't been racing since that Monday before his parents found out, now almost two months ago.

Hunter was just about to say no, he didn't feel like it, when he changed his mind. "Sure. Why not? It'll be nice to get on my bike again."

After training, which Hunter only watched, Shane, Tori, Blake, Dustin and Hunter headed for the race track. Blake had got permission from Sensei to keep his and Hunter's bikes at Ninja Ops so they wheeled them along. Hunter had a few practice races with Blake to get back into it. They arrived back next to the others. Hunter was breathless but grinning and he had colour in his face, neither of which had been seen for a long time.

"Wow," he gasped. "It's great to be out on the track again!"

"I'm done for now." Blake said. "How about we go into Storm Chargers on the way back and grab something to eat. There's nothing wrong with Cam's cooking but it'd be nice to have a change."

"I'm going to have one more race." Hunter said suddenly. "It's ok, you guys can watch."

They nodded. "Sure, whatever dude. It's nice to have you back!" Dustin said, slapping him on the back.

Hunter grinned and put his helmet on, then kicked his bike to life and headed back to the main track.

After a few practice laps, he upped the speed.

"Man, what's Hunter doing?" Dustin exclaimed. "He's riding way too fast for that part of the track. He's going to kill himself."

Suddenly Blake understood. "The idiot!" he exclaimed and began to run towards the track.

"What?"

Tori got it too, "That's exactly he's trying to do!" she yelled back at Shane and Dustin.

"Oh my god…"

He was cut off as at that moment Hunter's bike hit a bump and Hunter was flung up into the air. He crashed down and landed heavily, his bike lying on the ground nearby. He didn't move.

Blake was there in a second. He knelt down beside Hunter.

"Hunter?"

Hunter groaned and pushed himself up onto his hands and knees. He sat back and pulled of his helmet.

Blake stared at him. "What the hell do you think you were playing at?" he almost yelled at Hunter. Dustin, Tori and Shane stood a little way back, not wanting to get involved now they saw Hunter was alright.

"Playing at?" Hunter winced as he stood up. "I mis-judged the track, that was all."

"Don't you dare lie to me Hunter." Blake said. "You know this track as well as I do – you did that on purpose."

Hunter went to walk away. "So what if I did? I'm alive aren't I?"

Blake stood and shook his head in disbelief as Hunter went and picked up his bike. "I'll see you guys back at Ninja Ops." Hunter said and wheeled his bike towards the road. Blake gave an exasperated sigh and threw a rock angrily in his brother's direction. It missed.

What was Hunter playing at?

Hunter got back to Ninja Ops and slunk back to his room, avoiding Sensei and Cam. Blake had been right – he had done it on purpose. Maybe he wanted to die. But when he was riding, he could forget everything. And the faster he went, the less he had to remember. He felt so free. For the first time since Phil had come back, he hadn't thought of him. All he'd thought about was the speed and the riding. It had been great. Suddenly the memories that he'd been trying so hard to suppress rose to surface again and threatened to overwhelm him. Hardly thinking about it, Hunter reached for the knife that was under his pillow and went to draw it across his wrist.

"Hunter!"

Unbeknown to him, the others had returned and Dustin had said he was going to try to talk to Hunter. Hunter hadn't heard him approach and jumped at the sound of his name. The blade he had been holding against his wrist bit deep into his flesh.

"Hunter, I came to talk to you about…oh my god." Dustin stared at Hunter's wrist. Hunter followed his gaze and stared in almost puzzlement at the knife.

"Hunter don't…" Dustin began, but it was too late. Hunter had already pulled it out. Blood began to flow freely out of the gash and soon Hunter's arm and hand was covered with it. Dustin wasted no time. He grabbed Hunter's other hand and held it over the wound in an attempt to stop the bleeding, then hauled Hunter to his feet and man-handled him towards the main room where the others were telling Sensei about Hunter's latest accident. They were just going to love this…


"Sensei, he's crazy." Blake was almost yelling at him. "He did it on purpose."

"He's right." Shane said, siding with Blake. "It wasn't an accident."

Just then the door burst open and Dustin, almost dragging Hunter, hurried through. Hunter was white and Dustin didn't look much better. They were about to ask what was wrong when they saw the blood.

"Cam, get Dr. Chan here asap. I don't care if you have to transport him here – do it!" Sensei ordered him. "Get Hunter sitting down, arm in the air. That should slow down the bleeding and if he faints then he's already on the floor. What the hell happened Dustin?"

"I went in there to talk to him and I think I made him jump. Then I saw the knife and the blood. I just had to get him here as quickly as I could."

Sensei nodded, "You did the right thing."

Blake was sitting next to his brother keeping Hunter's hand over the cut and the arm raised. Blood was still seeping from between his fingers, but it had slowed down.

Dr. Chan arrived in record time. "Look who it is – my favorite patient." He tried to smile at Hunter but Hunter just seemed completely bewildered by what was happening around him. "Ok, let's get this arm sorted out."

Within a few minutes Dr. Chan had stopped the bleeding and got a bandage around the wound.

"I don't understand, what was he doing with the knife?" Dustin said. He was clearly blaming himself.

"I can answer that." Dr. Chan said and with a swift movement, before Hunter could even think of stopping him, he had pulled up Hunter's sleeve. The criss-cross of cuts and scars could be clearly seen. "My work here is done for the moment. If he does anything else, give me a shout." Dr. Chan said and left.

Hunter stood up once he had left. "I'll just be getting back to my room," he mumbled and made to leave, but Blake grabbed him.

"Oh no you don't. Not until you tell me what's going on here," he said angrily. Hunter tried to push past him, but Blake pushed him hard against the wall and gripped his shoulders.

"Blake…" Sensei cautioned.

"Stay out of this," he told the others. "This is between me and my brother and I'm not going to stop until he tells the truth." Hunter tried to push Blake away, but Blake slammed him against the wall again.

"I want to know what the hell is up with you. We all know you've had a hard time. Oh look at poor Hunter, got beaten up by his step-dad and know he's in such a mess. Boo hoo. Yeah, so, you've had a hard time. But so have we. Now you're what? Trying to kill yourself?"

"Blake, please." Hunter whispered.

"We're you friends Hunter. I'm your brother. I deserve more than this. We deserve more than this. What is your problem? All you have to do is open your mouth and talk for heavens sake. We can sort this out together. Why the hell didn't you tell me what was happening? All those times, you could have said. We'd have helped you. Why, Hunter, why?"

"Because I couldn't." Hunter yelled suddenly, giving Blake a shove that sent him flying. "I tried, but I couldn't find the right words. You wouldn't understand – none of you could understand." He sank down against the wall, tears falling down his cheeks. "I wanted to tell you so much," he sobbed. "I wanted to, but I, I just couldn't."

Blake got up and hurried over to his brother and put his arms around him. "Shhh, it's ok. It'll be ok," he tried to sooth him.

Hunter clung to his brother and just let himself cry. All the pain and anger that he'd been feeling just flowed out. He cried until there was nothing left in him to cry about. Blake held him until his sobs died away. The others quietly left them.

"Hunter?" Blake whispered softly to him, but there was no answer. He looked down at his brother and smiled when he saw he was asleep. He looked so peaceful. A bed was set up in the main room and with some difficulty he got Hunter into it. With a last smile at his brother, Blake went out to join the others.