Publishers note: I would just like to point out that everything in quotes is by ElfLover, please discard the fact that erik is completely out of chariture and this has absolutely nothing to do with POTO. Im sorry to disappoint anybody that wanted a good story about our wonderful Erik. This will be taken down when once a review is sent, or in a day, for she will kill me if she finds out. I LOVE YOU, MY BETA! (she's really good!). she probably found out, judgeing by the violet, satin Punjab around my neck.

one day Erik traveled to the future, and was forced to watch children's television. Upon returning, he writes a paper to the managers for no apparent reason. Here was the letter:

"My Little Ponies are the sluts of the kiddie video world. Their names all resemble stripper names. I mean, Strawberry Clouds? Fuzzy Peach Candy? Rainbow Sunshine? (I have no idea if those are actually My Little Pony names, but I'm willing to bet that at least one of them is).

Barney is the "crocodile pedophile" of the kiddie video world. I mean, come on: even his girlfriend (the short green one) is at least ten years younger than he is. It's so sick.

The Care Bears are the Mafia of the kiddie video world. They spy on and interrogate children and then hunt down the bad guys and "firing squad" them with their stupid little tummy Ray Guns of Happiness and Love and Candy.

The Teletubbies are the most pointless and idiotic of all the creatures in kiddie video world. They don't even speak correctly. It's all just baby talk. How do people expect kids to learn to speak properly if all they're hearing is Teletubby-talk until they're five years old? And all they do is eat custard or whatever the hell it is and talk to their robots and mess with the TVs on their stomachs, which are pointless because there will always be one creature left out: whoever's being the TV that day.

Sesame Street is probably the most educational place in the kiddie video world. Most of the people aren't clinically insane, and there's grown-ups there, so there's no fooling around with the kids. Plus they're not always hanging around the same set and encouraging stupid imaginary adventures or shooting bad guys. They go to different places, like firehouses or hospitals and shit like that. And they teach kids pronunciation and the alphabet and spelling and stuff. I predict that in the years to come, when Barney and his groupies the Teletubbies compete for the dictatorship of Earth with the Care Bears, and the My Little Ponies become ladies of the night and sell themselves to aging television producers, Sesame Street will become the revolutionaries' safe haven, like Les Amis de L'ABC (from Les Mis). Only without Grantaire and his wine. To the barricades, every man, woman, and puppet!"

OG

publishers note again: ok, when I read this, I'd just like to mention the fact that I thought of Avenue Q. thanks for reading! And a shoutout to all the special people that got to a really random fic!