Disclaimer: I don't own Hagane no Renkinjutsushi. Period. And besides, if you sued me, you wouldn't get very much...maybe a cat...o.x;

Flames will be thrown back at you by Roy, constructive criticism appreciated! n.n

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Title: Finality
Rating: PG-13(For...uh...language...implications...mentioning of sex?)
Genre: ANGST OFF THE FECKING CHART YO!
A/N: Make your own conclusions. I have mine, you're free to have yours. It was a drabblebunny that struck me and wouldn't stop biting to let me go to sleep.

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Golden eyes glanced tiredly at the clock beside the bed. Six AM, Roy should be getting up right about...ah, there was the muffled cursing, idiot must have overexerted himself last night...

"Coffee's just about ready, painkillers are next to the pot as usual, breakfast is your own problem," Ed called flatly. It was always the same, every time. He wouldn't admit it sometimes, but it hurt that Mustang would just put up that act for him...This time he'd ask though, he couldn't stand it anymore. Well...almost, he'd give anything...

Eyes weary from staying up all night thinking, red a bit from crying, hurt a bit from everything, watched as the Colonel slid from groggy to awake with each sip. Ed just watched from the couch as Roy got ready for work, headed for the door, hesitated at the eyes on his back, and finally turned to lock gold and black.

"What? Something on my face? Fuck, Ed are we going to do this every morning? I have to get to work or the Lieutenant is going to kill me!" Roy turned again, hand on the doorknob.

"Roy..."

The dark-haired man paused again, hand still on the knob.

Ed swallowed hard. This was where he'd always lose it and Mustang would just walk out.

"Fullmetal if there's something you need to say then just-"

"If I was a woman, could you love me?" Ed noted the shocked gasp, faint as it was. Roy didn't turn around, wouldn't face him. "I do love you, Edward, what-"

"No, Roy! Could you really love me? You think I don't notice how you hardly ever say my name during sex! How you always fuck me from behind so you don't have to see my face! You think I can't tell that you're just fucking me because I'll let you and you just need the sex!" Ed saw the cringe, even through his tears. "Why can't you look me in the eye and say that you love me! Because you don't! I'm not stupid, Roy, you should know that!"

"What will you do then?" Roy still kept his back to the sobbing boy.

Edward shut his eyes to block out the image of Mustang's back, always to him. "What will I do? I'll do the same thing I've been doing...I need it, just as much as you do, I just need it for a different reason than yours.." Blonde hair fell before his eyes like a veil, "Just being with you is enough for me...I may never be able to make you love me, Roy, but I can't just stop loving you..."

The silence stretched for too long, and for a moment, Ed might have believed the man would hold him, say those words and really mean them. But that would be wishful thinking, and it didn't do to get his hopes up. He didn't move as the doorknob was turned and the hinges squeaked, not even as he heard Roy's footfalls step past the threshold.

It surprised him, though, that the man's voice carried back towards him. "I'm sorry..."

It wasn't until the door had already closed and the sound of footfalls faded that Edward really understood what had been said. It wasn't until Roy didn't return home that night that the words finally truly set in. It wasn't until the three AM call from headquarters that Ed let go and cried himself to sleep.


It's a really weird thing, isn't it? I have no clue, it just jumped at me.