A/N: The second-to-last chapter is here! Ok, this is basically about the morning before Devan dies, and is told through Woody's point of view. And I kinda wrecked myself with this because I realised that during Fire From The Sky, Woody actually says he saw Devan three days ago, and this is actually the day she died…but you can't blame me; blame Australia for holding off the rest of the fourth season until February...

Disclaimer: I don't own Crossing Jordan or the song "Sweet Surrender" by Sarah McLachlan.

FKW: Grab a tissue. That's my warning. Lol, nah you probably won't cry in this one cause it's all about Devan and Woody and has nothing to do with Jordan. Anyway, thanks for the ever-faithful review and I apologise for making it painful for you ;) Oh and drugs are cool. I'll cya Monday :)

astacia: Thanks for the review! And don't worry, Devan's ex doesn't really do anything bad to her…but you'll have to wait for the sequel to find out what actually happened cause this is the second last chapter. Thank you again for the review :)

xoRetributionxo: Ooh another reviewer! Thank you thank you! Lol, it'd be interesting to do a survey to see how many people actually liked Devan ;) Anyway, thanks for the review and I hope to hear from you again! Keep reading :)

Ok, sit back and enjoy the ride!

Deception
Chapter 10: Sweet Surrender


November 14, 2004...

The first thing I felt was coldness beside me. The sun streamed down in golden rays onto her pillow when I opened my eyes…to find her not there. The sheets and covers were in disarray and the pillow was creased immensely. The cold crept over to my side and bit into me even as the rays of sun blinded me from behind. There was no escape from the dreaded coldness of morning so I shifted into a comfortable sitting position and sidled further away from her side of the bed. I glanced a look at my bedside table to take in the time, which was nine-thirty, and found a small piece of paper with her name signed at the bottom. I took it and read it carefully.

I'm working late tonight but I thought I'd get an early start. I'll see you tonight, bring the Chinese. Love Devan.

Love. Was that how we both felt?

-It doesn't mean much, it doesn't mean anything at all

The life I've left behind me

Is a cold room

I've crossed the last line, from where I can't return

Where every step I took in faith

Betrayed me and led me from my home-

I touched my cheek impulsively, wondering whether or not I hadbeen dreaming when I felt her fingers brush lightly against my skin. Her touch was so soft…unlike anyone else's. Not only did it make me feel safe, it made me feel special. She could always do that, though; make me feel special. And she did that with her eyes…the way they looked at me. She did that with her lips…the way they kissed me. She did that with her voice…the way it spoke to me. Everything about her was so unique and so incredibly independent from anybody else that even the thought of her being with me made me feel amazing.

-Sweet, sweet surrender

Is all that I have to give?

You take me in

No questions asked-

But she was gone and I felt hollow. The thought of her not being there when I had woken up disturbed me, though I didn't know why. I guess it was because she had been there when I fell asleep and it didn't seem complete without her here now. I had watched her last night, the way she often flinched in her sleep and turned away, kind of like trying to turn away from a nightmare. Everything about her was so detailed and fresh in my mind it was as if I could almost visualise her beside me, staring at me with laughing eyes like she always did when I joked around.

-You strip away the ugliness

That surrounds me

You are an angel

Am I already that gone?-

Or the way she looked at me with worried eyes when I would talk about my family. She didn't openly sympathise and I was grateful for that, but I could tell she felt my pain in part and that made me feel loved. It was as if she knew what I was going through and could comfort me in a way no one else could, both emotionally and physically.

-I only hope that I won't disappoint you

When I'm down here on my knees-

I remember once I looked into her eyes and I could not look away. It was a serious moment and the two of us had been sobered with the startling revelation that what we had, no one else had. Her lips were partly open in a small smile and her green eyes looked deeply into mine. I was lost in them, those pools of mesmerising emerald liquid. I was stilled, I didn't know what else to do but stare into them.

I slowly slid back into the bed, the thin sheets coming to rest over my chest. I leaned back heavily into the mattress and breathed in, taking in immediately the scent of her perfume. It still lingered, after hours of her being gone, and I was taken by it. It was a lavender scent, and one I immediately identified with her. She often wore it, but I remember the first time we had met I could smell it on her. It was her scent.

-And I don't understand

By the touch of your hand -

The way she could bring me out of myself when I felt like I was the only person alive was unmistakeably her. No one else could do that like she could. With her I didn't need to know how I looked, or what tie I was wearing. With her I felt like I could give her the key to unlock that dark basement that I had been locked in years ago when I was surrounded by tragedy. And I knew she wouldn't turn the key in the hole. She was too smart for that. She knew about my parents, about my brother…but she didn't need to know about darkness. She only wanted to know about light. She wouldn't open that basement even if I begged her to.

For years I had been this dark wick that stood firmly in the middle of a candle. I had waited for someone to light me. Devan had.

-I would be the one to fall-

And it was so much more than an attraction. She listened, she helped, she healed.

-I miss the little things

I miss everything-

Opening my eyes again to the light that was the sun, I saw a shadow when I blinked. It was of a woman, kneeling down to help me. Sowing up the wounds with her fingers. Mending me into completion again.

-It doesn't mean much

It doesn't mean much at all-

A tear welled up in my right eye and I didn't know why. I didn't know what it was for. But it was there…and it toppled over the edge of my eyelid, sliding slowly down my cheek and leaving a stained trail.

-The life I left behind me-

Closing my eyes again, I summoned a picture of her. She was looking out of a small window, staring down at the clouds below her. Her emerald eyes were determined and set. She was ready for whatever is was she had to do.

-Is a cold room-

I needed to see her again. Soon.


A/N: And of course we all know he never does…or does he? You'll have to wait for the sequel, but in the mean time I'll be posting the last chapter of this in a few days. It'll be in Devan's point of view and kind of follows the same path as this chapter.

Peace guys.