I'm here to make things right among you…survivors…once an for all. It's time for you to stop your stupid gossipin' bout me an' the little lady. So listen up, cause I'll only say this once.

There is nothing, I repeat, nothing, between us.

Now stop looking at me like that, I'm tellin' the truth.

What do you mean, kiss? That was nothin'. A tactic, that's all. I didn't really want to kiss her, I just preferred it over getting sharp pointy things dug under my fingernails. Wouldn't you? It's not cause she's just so pretty, or her lips, oh boy…no! No, it was just a tactic. It didn't mean anything. An' it'd never happen again. Ever!

I'm stranded on a damn island, I've gotta have some kind of fun, right? I'm only a man. And every man's gotta have some piece of ass to look at, right? She just happened to be right there. The Doc, you say? There's nothin' between them either. Not that'd I'd care. It's just funny how he's always flirtin' with her when he knows she's mine…

What? Why are you still lookin' at me that way? Stop it! I'll poke you in the eye, I will!

She's a fugitive! You hear me? I could never love a fugitive. Just doesn't work for me. She's just so damn manipulative. Almost as much as me…oh the things we could do…arg! No! She's a dirty liar!

And her clothes! Now, I may be no fashion expert, but orange? Blah! That terrible green top she wears? Makes her eyes stand out too much. They're always shining from beneath her silky hair…creepy it is. Very creepy. I can't even stand to look at her. Though I know it bugs her when she catches me watching her…not that I do that often…the creepiness factor…yes.

Not to mention there are so many other women on the island! Like that Shannon chick. I always had a thing for blondes. Only she's always pining over her brother, that's nasty. Then there's Sun, reminds me of those Asian chicks in school uniforms, Mmm mmm. But she's got that overcontrolling husband, and I can only start so many fights before the Doc turns the guns on me. Babymama's already been scouted out by the rocker-wannabe. See, lots of girls! I have no reason to turn to Kate, the witch.

Now you see my reason? I, Sawyer, am not in love with Kate, Bell of the Island. Never in a thousand years. She could go drown herself for all I care! Get eaten by a polar bear, trampled by the friggen mons--

"Sawyer, do you have extra water bottle? I'm going fruit picking out by the waterfall,"

Waterfall! What reason does she got to be going all the way out there by herself.

"Get your own, freckles, I need mine,"

"What for? You're not going anywhere."

Not going anywhere. Ha, what little she knows.

"As a matter of fact, I am,"

Stupid girl.

"Well, then I'll just get some with Jack. Maybe he'll come with me,"

Jack? What did she say? That's our waterfall, thank you!

"Freckles!"

Ah hell….