No Matter How Dark the Night
Chapter 6
Can everyone forgive me for not posting a chap in so long? I am SOOOO sorry! Thanks to everyone for all their great reviews- rj, quirky, jen leonhart-and if I missed anyone, A general thank you to all of you.
Isthia stood frozen in place as Maester Mika intoned the words joining her to Kirin Lighthand as his wife. Feelings, memories, and thoughts swirled through her mind as if she were being sucked through a vortex. Beside her Lord Jyscal stood, his eyes downcast, mentally reproaching himself for supporting this course of action. He knew how important it had been to him to marry for love- he had defied an entire race of people to do so. Did not this poor girl deserve the same privilege?
"I now pronounce you man and wife." In the silence that followed, Isthia heard her heart shatter. That night, she died inside. As Kirin placed a hesitant kiss on her lips, she mentally screamed for Auron. Where was her only love as she was dying?
"I'm sorry, Gaia," Auron said as he roughly pulled away from the high priest's daughter's inviting kiss. She never ceased to surprise him. Their conversation had had nothing of the romantic in it, and the next thing Auron knew, she was in his arms, kissing him with a zeal and passion rivaled only by Isthia.
"What is it, Auron?" Gaia questioned, looking hurt. "Do you not find me attractive?'
"It's not that," Auron said haltingly. She was attractive, and the kiss had stirred emotions in him he thought only Isthia was capable of arousing. But he loved, and would love, only one. Now was the time to explain that to Gaia before things got worse than they already were.
"Gaia, you're a beautiful, desirable woman, and any man should count himself fortunate to have you," Auron began, taking Gaia's hand. "But, you must understand something about me, about my situation. Long ago my heart was promised to another. I cannot betray that promise, no matter how appealing the offer. I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt you by promising something I cannot fulfill. Please understand."
A combination of rejection and the gentleness in Auron's tone caused tears to spring to Gaia's bright emerald eyes. She dashed them from her eyes, angry at showing weakness in front of Auron.
"Is it that apprentice summoner I always see you with?" Her voice was harsher than Gaia intended. When Auron nodded, Gaia could hold the tears back no longer.
"I've known her since we were children. When she had nothing, I was there. I've always been there for her, and I always will be. She completes me Gaia. Love like that cannot just easily disappear with the affection of another."
Auron flinched as Gaia's hand flew at his cheek. The echo of the slap reverberated across the glassy stillness of Macalania Lake, where they were camped for the night.
"Come to your senses, Auron! You know it's forbidden for a warrior monk and a summoner to...enjoy such companionship! You would hold on to a dream in lieu of a living breathing woman who can love you without fear of discovery and consequences?"
Auron stood up. When he spoke, the quiet anger in his voice was unmistakable "My love for Isthia came about long before Yevon's rules interposed on it, and it will continue long after Yevon has no say in our lives. I believe it is you who holds on to a dream, Gaia, a dream that will never be. I hope it keeps you warm at night." With that he spun on his heel and walked away, Gaia's voice falling on his unwilling ears.
"You're a fool, Auron! This isn't over, just wait and see! I'm not finished, and I don't give up that easily! Auron!"
The journey back to Bevelle the next day was spent in frosty silence, which made Auron not uncomfortable in the least. He had not wanted to cause Gaia pain, but if pain was the only thing that would make her understand, so be it. Gaia, on the other hand, would prove to be a far wilier adversary than Auron could imagine. While dreams of Isthia filled his mind, Gaia was consumed by thoughts of how to force Auron to see her point, to understand that love was no match for the power of a high priest's daughter.
After her marriage, Isthia had thrown herself into her training with a zeal that surprised and worried her new husband. While she had stayed true to her word, and he had not known all the pleasures of his wife, he had come to realize that her idea of marriage and his was far different. At every opportunity she made it clear that this was not to be a marriage in the strictest sense of the word. They shared a home, but not a bed. In the rare instances they were together, she hardly spoke, and when she did it was with icy, distant courtesy. It saddened Kirin that it had come to this, but he was the type of man who always got what he wanted, no matter the cost. He didn't care how she reacted. He knew it was only a matter of time before she cracked and relented. So he was content to wait, to bide his time until just the right moment....
Isthia on the other hand, had no intention of buckling or cracking. Every night after her training was complete, the floor of Bevelle temple was awash with a flood of tears. The tears of a poor brokenhearted girl who cried out her pain at the feet of the stone statues of high summoners long gone. But when she had sobbed herself into a state of exhaustion, she slowly would rise, her head up, and her emotions sealed away....until the next night, where impassive stone faces would once again witness the agony of a love denied.
In the end, it was Kirin who cracked. After Isthia had returned home one night, the night before she knew Auron would return, Kirin could stand it no longer.
"Isthia. Please," he began, placing a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from walking away. Isthia stopped. "Please what, Kirin? I have nothing to say to you."
The words stabbed at Kirin like a knife. He hid the pain well, though, taking a deep breath before exhaling slowly.
"Tomorrow, High Priest Molkan returns. There will be a celebration of that event which, Maester Mika informed me, will also serve as our wedding reception. For your sake, I hope you can adopt a better demeanor than what you have now."
Isthia sighed and shrugged off his hand. "Kirin, I promised you the night we were married that I would support your career in any way, and I'll keep my promise. I'll be the perfect token wife. I'll say all the right things, I'll do all the right things, and I'll suck up to all the right people. But there my obligation ends. What I do with my demeanor is none of your concern. Good night." And with that she entered her room and slammed the door.
Once inside, Isthia screamed into a tightly balled pillow. Her only love was returning tomorrow to what he thought would be a warm reception. How would he react when the icy dagger of truth pierced his heart? Isthia's tears flowed anew at the betrayal she knew she had inflicted on him. Why o why couldn't she have fought more? It was a struggle she endured every night. Her heart screamed 'you've betrayed the best thing you ever had! COWARD! You deserve the pain you're enduring.' But her mind said 'how could you possibly love Auron if you're dead, for you know that's where you would have ended up if you had defied the order of Yevon. If Auron loves you at all, he will understand.' And so with that thought Isthia fell into a fitful sleep, her dreams haunted by the thousand wounds inflicted on her soul.
WELL?!? Review PLEASE! You should see the stress I went through writing this one! I don't like doing this to them any more than you like reading it! But that's why they call it a drama- I promise there will be a few things to happen in the next chapters that will sort of make up for all this.....
Can everyone forgive me for not posting a chap in so long? I am SOOOO sorry! Thanks to everyone for all their great reviews- rj, quirky, jen leonhart-and if I missed anyone, A general thank you to all of you.
Isthia stood frozen in place as Maester Mika intoned the words joining her to Kirin Lighthand as his wife. Feelings, memories, and thoughts swirled through her mind as if she were being sucked through a vortex. Beside her Lord Jyscal stood, his eyes downcast, mentally reproaching himself for supporting this course of action. He knew how important it had been to him to marry for love- he had defied an entire race of people to do so. Did not this poor girl deserve the same privilege?
"I now pronounce you man and wife." In the silence that followed, Isthia heard her heart shatter. That night, she died inside. As Kirin placed a hesitant kiss on her lips, she mentally screamed for Auron. Where was her only love as she was dying?
"I'm sorry, Gaia," Auron said as he roughly pulled away from the high priest's daughter's inviting kiss. She never ceased to surprise him. Their conversation had had nothing of the romantic in it, and the next thing Auron knew, she was in his arms, kissing him with a zeal and passion rivaled only by Isthia.
"What is it, Auron?" Gaia questioned, looking hurt. "Do you not find me attractive?'
"It's not that," Auron said haltingly. She was attractive, and the kiss had stirred emotions in him he thought only Isthia was capable of arousing. But he loved, and would love, only one. Now was the time to explain that to Gaia before things got worse than they already were.
"Gaia, you're a beautiful, desirable woman, and any man should count himself fortunate to have you," Auron began, taking Gaia's hand. "But, you must understand something about me, about my situation. Long ago my heart was promised to another. I cannot betray that promise, no matter how appealing the offer. I'm sorry. I don't want to hurt you by promising something I cannot fulfill. Please understand."
A combination of rejection and the gentleness in Auron's tone caused tears to spring to Gaia's bright emerald eyes. She dashed them from her eyes, angry at showing weakness in front of Auron.
"Is it that apprentice summoner I always see you with?" Her voice was harsher than Gaia intended. When Auron nodded, Gaia could hold the tears back no longer.
"I've known her since we were children. When she had nothing, I was there. I've always been there for her, and I always will be. She completes me Gaia. Love like that cannot just easily disappear with the affection of another."
Auron flinched as Gaia's hand flew at his cheek. The echo of the slap reverberated across the glassy stillness of Macalania Lake, where they were camped for the night.
"Come to your senses, Auron! You know it's forbidden for a warrior monk and a summoner to...enjoy such companionship! You would hold on to a dream in lieu of a living breathing woman who can love you without fear of discovery and consequences?"
Auron stood up. When he spoke, the quiet anger in his voice was unmistakable "My love for Isthia came about long before Yevon's rules interposed on it, and it will continue long after Yevon has no say in our lives. I believe it is you who holds on to a dream, Gaia, a dream that will never be. I hope it keeps you warm at night." With that he spun on his heel and walked away, Gaia's voice falling on his unwilling ears.
"You're a fool, Auron! This isn't over, just wait and see! I'm not finished, and I don't give up that easily! Auron!"
The journey back to Bevelle the next day was spent in frosty silence, which made Auron not uncomfortable in the least. He had not wanted to cause Gaia pain, but if pain was the only thing that would make her understand, so be it. Gaia, on the other hand, would prove to be a far wilier adversary than Auron could imagine. While dreams of Isthia filled his mind, Gaia was consumed by thoughts of how to force Auron to see her point, to understand that love was no match for the power of a high priest's daughter.
After her marriage, Isthia had thrown herself into her training with a zeal that surprised and worried her new husband. While she had stayed true to her word, and he had not known all the pleasures of his wife, he had come to realize that her idea of marriage and his was far different. At every opportunity she made it clear that this was not to be a marriage in the strictest sense of the word. They shared a home, but not a bed. In the rare instances they were together, she hardly spoke, and when she did it was with icy, distant courtesy. It saddened Kirin that it had come to this, but he was the type of man who always got what he wanted, no matter the cost. He didn't care how she reacted. He knew it was only a matter of time before she cracked and relented. So he was content to wait, to bide his time until just the right moment....
Isthia on the other hand, had no intention of buckling or cracking. Every night after her training was complete, the floor of Bevelle temple was awash with a flood of tears. The tears of a poor brokenhearted girl who cried out her pain at the feet of the stone statues of high summoners long gone. But when she had sobbed herself into a state of exhaustion, she slowly would rise, her head up, and her emotions sealed away....until the next night, where impassive stone faces would once again witness the agony of a love denied.
In the end, it was Kirin who cracked. After Isthia had returned home one night, the night before she knew Auron would return, Kirin could stand it no longer.
"Isthia. Please," he began, placing a hand on her shoulder to prevent her from walking away. Isthia stopped. "Please what, Kirin? I have nothing to say to you."
The words stabbed at Kirin like a knife. He hid the pain well, though, taking a deep breath before exhaling slowly.
"Tomorrow, High Priest Molkan returns. There will be a celebration of that event which, Maester Mika informed me, will also serve as our wedding reception. For your sake, I hope you can adopt a better demeanor than what you have now."
Isthia sighed and shrugged off his hand. "Kirin, I promised you the night we were married that I would support your career in any way, and I'll keep my promise. I'll be the perfect token wife. I'll say all the right things, I'll do all the right things, and I'll suck up to all the right people. But there my obligation ends. What I do with my demeanor is none of your concern. Good night." And with that she entered her room and slammed the door.
Once inside, Isthia screamed into a tightly balled pillow. Her only love was returning tomorrow to what he thought would be a warm reception. How would he react when the icy dagger of truth pierced his heart? Isthia's tears flowed anew at the betrayal she knew she had inflicted on him. Why o why couldn't she have fought more? It was a struggle she endured every night. Her heart screamed 'you've betrayed the best thing you ever had! COWARD! You deserve the pain you're enduring.' But her mind said 'how could you possibly love Auron if you're dead, for you know that's where you would have ended up if you had defied the order of Yevon. If Auron loves you at all, he will understand.' And so with that thought Isthia fell into a fitful sleep, her dreams haunted by the thousand wounds inflicted on her soul.
WELL?!? Review PLEASE! You should see the stress I went through writing this one! I don't like doing this to them any more than you like reading it! But that's why they call it a drama- I promise there will be a few things to happen in the next chapters that will sort of make up for all this.....
