I. Chapter 1: Preventing Disaster
(Setting: Book 1 - last few pages - on Earth)
Disclaimer: No, we don't own Tokyo Mew Mew. Honestly, do you think if we did, we'd let Ichigo and Masaya always be center-stage! And would Kish die! And would Pai be so . . . STUPID! NO! Also, We don't own rights to any of the Veggie Tales songs or references. Sadly.
Carolina: This is entitled "Chapter 1" because it is. Before was just the prologue. Now, you lucky readers get to see the full extent of our madness.
Pai: -scans the prologue- You forgot to explain in simple terms what yoken is. You know that feeble-minded humans couldn't possibly comprehend our advanced system of currency.
Georgia: o.O -uses remote control to switch to Worker Pai-
Worker Pai: Well, now! Listen up, kids! Yoken is the word for currency on us aliens' home planet! Why we call it that? Well, it's because . . . um . . . . because, er . . . . -looks to Carolina-
C: Because it sounds like oxen, and that's the plural form of ox. Oxen are very special. That are related to cebus, which are very close to our hearts. Right?
G: Mm hmm! -is straining to drag a large psychiatrist's lounge sofa over (hops on and breaks into song with Carolina-
Both: ON THE DAY I GOT MY TOOTH, I HAD TO KISS MY GREAT AUNT RUTH! SHE HAD A BEARD . . . AND IT FELT WEIRD!
Worker Pai: Cebuuuuuuuu!
Us: CEBUUUUUU!
Tart: -is a Pirate Who Doesn't Do Anything- ..;;;;;
Zakuro: Oh . . . my . . . . -adjusts her hat- -smiles at mirror- . . . . Cheese.
"I wanted to see the human trying to sabotage our plans. But. . ." a snide voice
from above said, "you're pretty cute!"
Ichigo tensed us, startled. Who was that? Suddenly, a figure appeared before her in
a flash of green and gold. Before she could even catch who it was, the figure leaned in
swiftly and . . . pinned her wrists to the wall. (N/A: You thought I was gonna write
"kissed her", right? Well . . . I'M NOT. Things are gonna be different this time 'round!Bwuahaha! That stupid kiss started Kish's obsession with that . . . thing . . . . that . . . that. . . demon in a skirt! So I'm writing this MY WAY! Hahahaaa!) Ichigo flinched. As she
tentatively reopened her eyes, she saw a emerald-haired boy about her age with the most
(beautiful) (wonderful) (gorgeous) (dazzling) startlingly golden eyes she'd ever seen. The
strange boy peered down at her as she was fixed to the wall, helpless. He looked her over
once . . . and then again. Ichigo opened her mouth to scream for help, but before she could
do so the green-haired boy cupped her face rather roughly with one long, elegant hand and
directed her attention to his face forcefully.
"Don't think I'll go easy on you just because you're pretty. You're in way over
your head, doll-face."
He released her wrists. Somehow, the boy could levitate up off the ground and-
from his stance in midair- he waggled his fingers good-bye.
"By the way, my name is Kish. I already know yours . . . Ichigo. See you later,
strawberry," he scoffed, playfully grinning. Before Ichigo could utter a sound, Kish
disappeared. Her mind reeled. What . . . ! How . . . ? He could levitate and teleport?
How's that possible! Ichigo stood in the town square, dazed. She lifted her hand and
gingerly brushed her fingertips over the slight bruises Kish's hand had left on her cheek.
'What a strange young man . . .'
Up on the ship, Kish returned to chaos. Two tall, dark haired girls were restlessly
making their way around the bridge of the ship, each in their own peculiar, haphazard
path. In the middle of the bridge were Tart and Kaida, both very loud as usual, who were
trying to have a civilized heated debate but were constantly bumped and shoved by the
two strange girls who were toying with every gadget, switch, lever and button within
reach. Kish noticed Pai, in the corner, ignoring the intense clamor with such restraint that
Kish deemed it possible that he actually got up extra early each morning and practiced this
bizarre sport, loving every minute of the strain.
"Pai," Kish called loudly in a futile attempt to divert Pai's attention away from his
computer screen, "you've got visito--"
"Well, well! Who do we have here?"
Kish was cut off by one of the twin girls suddenly leaning closer and closer to his
face, her lucid blue eyes peering into Kish's golden ones. "You're awfully cute! What's
your name, kid?"
A sly grin broke out on Kish's features. "You're not bad yourself, honey. I'm Kish.
Now what are two pretty girls like you doing up here with little ol' me?"
The girl, who looked to Kish much older than he, maybe 5 years more, backed
away from his face. "Koumi and I," she motioned to the other girl, who had scarlet eyes,
"were "ordered" to stay here after we got these darling tiger ears and tails from that one
over there." She jabbed her thumb over her shoulder in Pai's direction. "We're not so sure
he's learned how to talk yet, and we weren't gonna stay . . . but if there are any other guys
even half as adorable as you, toots, we'd be glad to crash here." The girl looked Kish up
and down and ruffled his hair. "See ya, kid."
The blue-eyed girl was summoned by her sister, Keihi, to go and check out their
new room. They sped down the hall, chattering away at full volume. Kish watched them
go until they turned a corner. Walking up to Pai, Kish hopped up to sit on the table next to
Pai.
"You stud, you! Turning girls into Mew Mews just so you can date them? I didn't
know you had it in you, Pai!" exclaimed Kish happily, slapping the older alien heartily on
the back as congratulations.
"I do NOT plan on dating either of them . . ." Pai responded uninterestedly, still
focused on the computer monitor.
"Why not? You can't find many girls who are cuter than that!"
Pai looked up from his computer to glare silently at the green-haired boy, hoping
that Kish would get the point. Kish, in fact, did not. In fact, he was now rather interested
with the fervent argument between Kaida and Tart which, oddly enough, was totally
undisturbed by the twins' commotion.
"YOU'RE stupider!", Tart jeered as he pulled his lower eyelid downwards with his
index finger.
"No, YOU'RE stupider!", Kaida retorted, making a face.
"Nuh-UH. You're STUPI--"
Pai sighed and, turning back to his computer screen, said, "I don't know why I
ever allowed those two on board . . ." Suddenly, a flickering gold blip on the computer
screen caught his eye. He sighed with even more enthusiasm than usual. "MAKIE.
REPORT TO THE BRIDGE."
. . . . . . . Nothing happened . . . . .
"TODAY, MAKIE."
"Keep your hair on, I'm coming," called a voice that sounded far off. Within
minutes, Makie sauntered into the area. "What is it, Your Highness?" she asked dryly. She
took a sip of a drink she was holding which radiated large, rolling clouds of fog. from the
top of the container. Pai's eyes narrowed at her beverage but remained silent.
"My sensors indicate that you were in my laboratory. I told you never to go in my
lab. What were you doing?"
"Making iced tea," Makie replied simply, holding up the smoking glass of so-called
iced tea and taking a swig of it. Kish, who was grinning like a loon in the face of the elder
alien, was swatted away by an aggravated Pai.
Kaida, having abandoned Tart, inquired, "Why is it . . um, foaming?"
"I had to use dry ice in it because Pai, the master chemist," Makie said
sarcastically, "doesn't have any plain water in his entire inventory. Wanna taste?"
"Hey, gimme some of that," Kish said, making his way over to where Makie was.
As Kaida tasted the iced tea, which apparently was quite good with cubes of
frozen carbon dioxide, Pai massaged his temples as if to soothe some sort of a throbbing
headache. "Alright, enough of this. Get to work."
"I beg your pardon?" Makie asked caustically.
"I know this must be difficult for your tiny brain to grasp . . ." Pai began.
At this, Makie flushed with indignance and crossed her arms across her chest
defiantly, glaring at Pai as he continued. Kish observed the tension between them like he
was watching a reality show on TV.
". . . but, yes, we are here to complete a mission. Get. To. Work."
"Doing what, exactly," she demanded, irritated.
"Finding and eliminating the fourth member of Tokyo Mew Mew. Take Tart,
Keihi, and Koumi with you. Oh, and Kish, you go, too. I cannot stand your presence for
another moment longer."
"Well, you're not the life of the party either, ya know."
Once they teleported back down on Earth, the group arrived in the park where a
petting zoo had visited for a few days.
(N/A: This setting is sort of a blend between the manga and the anime version of
when Pudding is found however, I may use a bit of dialogue between Kish and Pudding
from the anime, which I DO NOT own.)
From the middle of a small crowd, a loud and energetic voice could be heard
shouting,
"Thank you, THANK YOU, na no da you're TOO kind! Thank you for clapping
for Pudding's act na no da! Pudding loves the lime light na no da! DON'T BE SHY;
TIPS ARE GREATLY APPRECIATED, NA NO DA!"
Makie and the twins pushed their way to the front of the crowd as Tart and Kish
watched from above, where they were floating about the commotion. In the center of the
circle of people was a small blonde girl, balancing on an oversized ball, walking a
tightrope and swinging from tree branches. After each routine, the crowd clapped with
moderate enthusiasm, some even tossing a bit of loose change at her feet. At this, the
young girl beamed with genuine delight. Tart, levitating just a bit over the throng of
pedestrians, couldn't help but blush a light crimson at the tiny blonde laughing with
appreciative joy at the trifling amount of tips she was granted.
"Thanks for coming to see Pudding's show na no da, and she loves you ALL!
Pudding is going to take a break now na no da, but PLEASE all come back later for her
NEXT performance na no da! AND PUDDING SO GRACIOUSLY THANKS HER
FANS FOR THE WONDERFUL TIPS NA NO DA!"
The crowd thinned and Kish landed, striding over to the wide-eyed child. "Hi," he
said, strangely casual. ( The next few lines do not belong to me; I borrowed them from the
anime as an attempt to give the story some authenticity .;; )
"Wh-who are you, na no da!" she asked.
"I am . . . an angel," Kish replied. Tart rolled his eyes and scowled at the back of
Kish's head for toying with her like this.
"What's with you?" Makie whispered, noticing that Tart was not enjoying the fun.
She bent down and stretched Tart's cheeks out, anime-style.
Tart, shaking her off, retorted with resentment, "Kish can be such a jerk
sometimes. She seems cool."
Makie raised her eyebrows at this uncharacteristic empathy from Tart, but
nevertheless diverted her attention back to the conversation.
"LIAR, na no da!" the girl shouted. "An angel wouldn't have an EVIL face that ,
na no da!"
The twins burst out into a fit of giggles as Kish sorta "fell", in a way only anime
characters can, you know. Even Makie was finding it hard to contain her laughter.
"What a rude little girl," the green-haired boy responded. "And to think that I fell
from the heavens to grant your wish . . . Oh wait, I think you call those "fallen angels". . ."
"GO AWAY, na no da!" she shouted, sounding more confident than she felt. "Na
no da, Pudding does NOT want to talk to you!"
". . . He name's Pudding . . ." Tart muttered to himself in the background.
"You're bluh-shing!" Koumi sang while flicking one of his pigtails. Of course, this
only made Tart flush an interesting shade of maroon.
"I'm afraid we can't do that; we've got business with you, Pudding," Kish sneered.
Makie, Keihi and Koumi- each in their own Mew Mew outfit- surrounded Pudding and
closed off all means of escape.
"So," said Kish, "how does Pai want this done exactly: after we get her soul, do
we kill her or bring her to the ship?"
"NEITHER," a confident voice asserted from behind the group. Six heads turned
around to see three girls, each in a uniform of their respective color. The foremost girl,
who was covered head-to-toe in pink including her hair and her eyes oddly enough,
pointed her index finger accusingly at Kish. The green-haired alien looked her over
apathetically, his thin, elegant eyebrows furrowing in annoyance.
"Onee-chan!" Pudding cheered enthusiastically.
"How dare you try to harm an innocent child! Mew Ichigo will not allow such
offense!" Mew Ichigo cried. The three summoned their weapons with much glitter and the
appropriate sound effects.
Striking her trademark pose, Mew Ichigo announced with vim, "For the future of
Earth, we will serve you! Ribbon Strawbe--!"
"Hey, HOLD IT you!" Koumi shouted at Mew Ichigo, interrupting the attack
shamelessly. "How can you SAY such a thing?"
"Wh-what? What did I say?" stammered Mew Ichigo uncertainly.
"You said that you'd serve US, for the future of Earth! You can't attack us now.
Not after you publicly vowed to join us!" Keihi accused Mew Ichigo, fully aware of what
Mew Ichigo really meant.
Taken aback, Mew Ichigo drew her head back tentatively. "No! I mean, I'll serve
the people of Earth for their future!"
"That's not what I heard!"
"B-but I always say that!" Mew Ichigo protested. "I can't just CHANGE it!
Besides, everybody KNOWS I mean I'll serve the people of Tokyo!"
"We don't! We're new around here!"
Tart, who was growing increasingly impatient, hovered over to Pudding.
"Pudding does not understand, na no da!" the small girl declared vehemently.
"I don't get it either. They're all stupid."
"Why, na no da?"
"Uh . . .um, they don't take anything seriously . . . and they think they're so great
just 'cuz they're older and stuff."
"Oh . . .OH WELL," Pudding said brightly. "Na no da, Pudding would like to
know your name and if you want this." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a
handful of colorfully-wrapped hard candy.
Tart stared down at the candy. "You're giving me that? . . ."
"Yes, yes, na no da! The candy was given to Pudding as a tip from a red-haired
girl, but Pudding does not need it! Pudding would like to get rid of it na no da!"
"And so you'd figure you'd dump it on me. . .?" Tart asked dryly.
"YEAH, NA NO DA!"
" . . . Why not!"
Meanwhile, the three Mew Mews and the twins were still going at it.
"I obviously don't want to serve YOU GUYS! When I say "I'll serve YOU" I
mean "YOU" as in the crowd of people I defend!"
"Well, I don't know about you, but I don't see any crowds!"
"I KNOW but--"
"HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA!"
"HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEE HEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEEHEE!"
"WHEEEEEE! LET'S GO ON THE SLIDE AGAIN!"
"NO, NO! LET'S GO ON THE SWINGS NA NO DA! PUSH ME, NA NO
DA, PUSH ME!"
Mew Ichigo was rather rudely interrupted by a sudden explosion of noise.
Everyone, now thoughrouly startled, whirled around to see what the fuss was about. On
the ground where Pudding and Tart once stood was a handful of empty candy wrappers
and the two children in question were having their way with the playground. Screaming (in
joy, supposedly), Pudding and Tart raced about the park, swinging from high places,
jumping up and down on only the frailest of things, and playing rather roughly with nearly
everything they came in contact with.
"OOH, NA NO DA! LOOK TAR-TAR! THIS IS WHERE THE PETTING
ZOO'S ANIMALS SLEEP!"
"HA HA HA! THAT WALRUS LOOKS SILLY! I WANNA PLAY WITH
IT!"
"SO DOES PUDDING! OH! OH, NA NO DA! PUDDING FOUND THE
KEYS, NA NO DA, TO THE JAGUARS' CAGES!
"I WANT THE KEYS! I WANNA PLAY WITH THE RHINO!
"What kind of a petting zoo has walruses, jaguars, and rhinos?" Koumi wondered.
"Perhaps they're convinced that children are more durable these day . . ." Keihi
offered.
"Durable? Tart? The same Tart who cried over a paper cut last week?" Makie
asked, her hand on her hip. "Tart! Taaaaaaart! Tart, GET BACK HERE!" Makie
called after him. She called several more times, but still got no response. Her frustration
began to get the better of her. "TART! TAAAART! YOU LITTLE MIDGET!
STOP TEASING THE HIPPOS!"
The next morning, Pai, having finished his Alien Newspaper (The Daily Ribbon)
and his coffee, turned to a human newspaper from Tokyo. The headlines read: "MASS
HAVOC!". Pai muttered to himself as he read, "Mmm. . . . fourth Mew Mew found . . .
zoo animals set loose . . . Earth teleprompter impaled by petting zoo rhino . . . mmm . . .
those responsible are a short blonde girl and a shorter, ginger-haired girl . . . . I see- Kish!"
The green-haired alien didn't even look up as he raided the refrigerator, two slices
of toast in his mouth. "Hmm?"
"Where's Tart?"
Kish, having finally found the jam, put both the toast and the jam on the table
which freed his mouth. "Tart? In his room. Shouting about some "stupid humans calling
him a girl" or something."
". . . And what did you do to stop him?"
"I reminded him that they also said he was shorter than Pudding."
