Well this just randomly appeared! Seriously. I think it fell out of my head onto the computer. Very random; I was watching the promos for the whole series and saw the 'The Christmukah That Almost Wasn't' scene with Kirsten and Caleb, and this popped into my head. Just short and not thought about, maybe there'll be more, maybe not! Read and review and I'll love you guys!
Summary: Kirsten in the closet during 'The Christmukah That Almost Wasn't'

Short, probably one shot.

Disclaimer: Don't own the characters, 'nuff said.

The Closet Is My Happy Place

I just threw a vase at my father's head. I screamed at him and flung the nearest thing that was handy.

It missed, shattering against the wall.

I just screamed at my father and my husband had to stop me attacking him. Actually lock his strong arms around my waist and drag me backwards to prevent me physically attacking him.

And my son saw it all.

Saw his mother go completely psycho, yelling at his grandfather whilst being restrained by his father.

Before I gaped, collapsed and began to cry.

Before I hid like a child.

And now my other son is trying to coax me out of the closet.

Is this what I've come to?

Sat tearstained and tipsy amongst my shoes, whilst my 17 year old son tries to talk sense to me.

Christ, my husband couldn't even get me out of here. He's gonna be mad if I come out now.

But I should. I know. Come out and face up to things.

Face up to the fact that my parent's marriage wasn't perfect, that my father had an affair which produced a child, that my father lied to me for 17 years and would have continued to if the secret hadn't come out.

She was pregnant with Lindsay when I was pregnant with Seth. Did he think about that?

No, don't even think about it Kirsten.

I should come out for Seth. He swears my and Sandy's PDA's have scarred him for life but this is going to have freaked him out more than a little.

Kirsten Cohen loosing her cool? His control-freak mother losing control? Unheard of.

I should come out for Sandy. He's been begging me to for hours. He's the only thing that stopped me really hurting my dad. He held onto me while I cried and clung to him, and he let me lock myself in here. Most people would have called in the white-coats by now!

Most of all I should come out for Ryan.

He doesn't need this right now. He doesn't deserve this. This isn't supposed to happen to him anymore.

No drinking, fighting, crying, he's supposed to have left all that behind. And I've gone and messed it up. Well, Caleb has. I am not taking any blame for this one.

Doesn't make it any easier though.

But coming out and facing everyone, after going demented on them?

Scared Kirsten?

Ok, deep breath, go out, apologise, make sure Ryan is ok, make sure Seth is ok, make sure Sandy is ok, then collapse into Sandy's arms. He can't make this go away but he can make it better. He can make me forget.

I'm coming out because I have to, because I should, because I can't stay hidden here forever, because I have a family and I have to reassure myself they're ok and for them to know that I'm ok. Actually I have to show myself I'm ok.

The only reason I want to come out is to find Sandy. He'll make it all okay.