Thanks for all the reviews. Sorry for taking so long in getting this chapter up. I want to try and have another chapter done in the next few days...things are starting to get hectic and it may be another week before I can get anything written. Hope everyone enjoys and keep the reviews coming. I have definitely enjoyed writing this story for all of you and at least giving Garret his time to shine.
After returning to Boston, Jen immediately continued her sessions with Dr. Stiles. She was more determined than ever to put her past to rest and move on with her life. However, this meant re-opening everything she had buried over the years and the first few months turned out to be rough...not only for her, but also for Garret. All her apprehensions and fears came to the surface causing so much self-doubt that little by little she shut down.
Garret watched as Jen slowly folded back into herself. He grew frustrated because not more than a few weeks after their return she had been seemingly happy. She put as much distance between the two of them as she possibly could…frustrating him even more. In the end Garret had no other choice but to speak with Stiles…if anything to find out what he needed to do to help her.
Stiles knew what was happening…he saw it everytime Jen came for a session. And he knew of Garret's feelings for her. He advised Garret to be there for her…no matter how hard she might push him away he had to push back. Garret almost had laughed at that…the most obvious answer turned out to be the only thing he could do.
So it began…slowly at first with just the simple things…maybe walking her to her car, ordering dinner when she worked late, or trying to have small conversations with her. Her quietness told him that she didn't want him around, but he pressed on. Sometimes he stopped by her apartment…movie in hand. He could see the intrusion bothered her, but eventually she would let him in. As they watched the movie he found that she would curl up against him…never saying much during those times either…instead he would just sit there and hold her. He knew through all this that she hated it…the silence was a clear indication of that, but there were times when he looked into her eyes that he saw some sense of understanding.
Late one evening as Garret was leaving the morgue he noticed Jen's car was still in the parking garage. He debated whether he should check on her and in the end his heart won over. Taking a deep breath he headed back to the elevator. Making his way to her office, he found the light on, but she was nowhere in sight. After checking in a few other areas, he eventually found her on the roof. He stood there for a few minutes…unsure whether to disturb her…watching her as she gazed up at the sky. Thousands of stars covered the night sky and he remembered back to their last night in Ohio when she was staring up to the sky then. Finally deciding it was best not to disturb her he reached for the doorknob when she stopped him.
"Don't go Garret." She turned around…watching as he slowly made his way towards her.
"How did you know it was me?" Taking a hard look at her, he could see how tired she was.
"Other than a few members of the night staff…who else would it be?" She tried to smile, but was too exhausted to even do that. Moving past him she took a seat on the steps.
Garret took a seat next to her and they remained quiet for some time until he heard her begin to cry. Turning his head, he saw her hands covering her face as the cries became louder. Instinctively he placed his hand on her back and began to rub in a circular motion.
"Hey…what's wrong?"
"Everything…everything is wrong. I can't seem to get anything right. I came back here with such high hopes and all I have done is make a mess of things…for myself…for us." She buried her face in her hands once again.
Moving closer, Garret wrapped his arm around her. "You haven't made a mess of anything…you've just let all of your uncertainties take over. You're trying to work through quite a bit right now…give yourself time. I'm not in any rush and besides, I'm here to help…remember that."
Leaning back into him, she felt his cheek rest against the top of her head. "You could do so much better than me you know."
Her comment caught him off guard. "What makes you say that?"
Her voice quieted and she slowly closed her eyes. "I'm such a burden to you…I carry around so much baggage…maybe…" Her eyes jerked open when Garret quickly stood up and pulled her with him. She saw the anger in his eyes and quickly swallowed.
"Maybe what…maybe I should just agree with you…that what I said to you back in Ohio meant nothing!" Anger continued to build and seeing the fear on her face almost made him stop, but he pressed on. "If I didn't want a relationship with you…I wouldn't have said what I did…I wouldn't have cared enough to go to Ohio to be there with you." He took a deep breath. "I love you damnit…doesn't that mean anything?" He struck a nerve with her and she fell into his arms in tears.
"I'm sorry…I'm sorry…" she repeated the same words over and over in between sobs and stopped when exhaustion took over.
"Look…I don't think you should be driving right now…why don't I just take you home. I can pick you up in the morning for work." He felt her nod against his chest and they walked to door.
He helped her gather her things in her office and then they made the quiet drive back to her apartment. Once there, they sat in the car…no one saying a word until she broke the silence.
"Stay…"
Garret turned to look at her, but she didn't look at him. "What?"
"I don't want to be alone…can you stay the night?" She looked at him now. "You can sleep on the couch….I…just…well would sleep better if I knew you were here."
"I'll need to go back to my place and get a few things. It will save me the trip in the morning."
Jen smiled softly and then got out of the car. She watched as Garret drove away and then slowly made her way to her apartment.
When he returned almost an hour later, he found that she had the couch ready…with sheets, a pillow, and a blanket. She had changed her clothes and was now wearing a long t-shirt and flannel pants. He was able to get a good look at her now…without the make-up…she looked pale, tired, and most importantly he could tell she had lost some weight…causing him to worry even more.
After he changed they sat and talked, and while the minutes wore on, Jen relaxed against him. After awhile he felt Jen's weight against him become heavy, realizing she had fallen asleep. He slowly got up…trying not to disturb her too much. He then carried her to the bedroom…slid her under the sheets and lightly kissed her forehead. As he turned to leave, her hand quickly took hold of his.
"Don't go…"
He looked down at her…her eyes were staring directly at him. "I don't think that would be a good idea."
"I just want you to hold me…nothing more."
Giving her a small smile he nodded, "alright." He watched as Jen moved over and then he slid in next to her. Their bodies made contact and he hoped that she was going to be ok with all of it. Wrapping his arm her, he felt her move closer to him.
"Garret…"
His eyes were closed, but he was still awake. "Hhhmmmm."
"Thank you…for staying I mean." The feeling of his arms wrapped around her made her feel safe…his outburst to her earlier on the roof made her finally realize that she couldn't doubt his feelings for her anymore.
Garret didn't say a word, but instead just kissed the back of her head. Eventually the two drifted off to sleep…for Jen it would be the first time in days she slept straight through the night.
