Summary: Gandalf wants to be hot. Pippin wants to be noticed. Legolas hates the fact that Aragorn has many names. Gollum wants friends. Let's let Gandalf and all the others try another life. Do you think Gandalf will do a good job being Legolas?
Disclaimer: I don't own anything in this story. Well, except for a couple of the Ents, and the Stone door and… This is my first fanfiction.Author's note: Well, what can I say. Half a year, that's a long time. I haven't forgotten my story, I've just been busy with school and such things. But I'm back! Or almost… School's not over yet, but I thought a short update wouldn't hurt. Next time I update will be, soonest, in June. So please, hold on and I'll see you soon!
Aragorn...Gollum
Boromir...Pippin
Pippin...Elrond
Merry...Gimli
Sam...Gandalf
Frodo...Boromir
Legolas...Aragorn
Gimli...Sam
Gandalf...Legolas
Gollum...Frodo
Elrond...Merry
"Wow, dudes. I think I'm becoming crazy," Gandalf says and stares at a tree.
"Oh, really?" Merry says.
"That was news to me. Not," Legolas says.
"I mean, these trees are talking," Gandalf continues.
Merry and Legolas look at each other.
"Okaaaay. Gandalf, how are you feeling? Have you hit you're head?"
"No. Wait, the trees are talking about tea!"
"Look, Margaret, there are people in here," a maple says.
"Oh, they are so cute! Especially the little one, but he has an axe. That's not very nice," Margaret, the ash, says.
The maple studies Merry's axe and exclaims, "We don't need to worry. It doesn't look like he can use it"
"You're right, Selma, as usually. Have you seen Bert's new leave-cut? It's quite ghastly, if you ask me."
"I don't think I have. I haven't seen him since I was a treeplant, but, if I remember him correctly, he was handsome, a real lady's Ent," Selma sighs.
"I sense that someone has a crush. I haven't seen him, but word spreads around."
"Oh, really," Selma huffs, offended, "Nobody has told me. Who told you? It seems like I'm a little bit outside of the circle. Was it Henna, who told you? She's probably angry at me because Jonathan winked at me, but not at her."
"Ummm… Anna told me," Margaret says embarrassed.
"Oh, really. She used to be my best friend!" Selma cries. "Anna! Listen to me! With what did Henna buy you? We used to be friends!"
Anna tries to hide behind her neighbour.
"Now calm down, Selma. Let's not be hasty. Here take some tea," Margaret comforts.
"Ah, yes. You're right. I mustn't lose my calm. Thank you, could you put a dash of milk in it? Thank you," Selma says and drinks. "Margaret, that odd man is staring at us in a not polite way."
"Sod off, weirdo! Can't you see we're having a private discussion here!" Margaret shouts.
Gandalf stumbles backwards and says nervously, "Guys, these trees are angry. There is anger in this forest. We should go. Now!"
"Look, Thilda. That elf is standing on my root. It hurts! Go away! You're hurting me!" a birch says bitterly.
Gandalf throws himself on Legolas and they fall to the ground.
"Ouch! Gandalf! May I ask what you're doing?" Legolas asks and rubs his bottom.
"You were standing on her root. She was hurting."
Legolas looks at the tree that Gandalf points at. "Merry, I think we should take Gandalf away from here. I think the forest isn't good for him." Merry and Legolas grab Gandalf and drag him away.
"Now, that they're gone, we can continue to gossip. Thihi! What did you say Timothy said about me?" Selma asks quietly.
Gandalf digs his heels in the ground and shouts, "Selma! Timothy said you're leaves are starting to fall off!"
"Gandalf! What are you saying?"
"Timothy thinks Selma's starting to get old," Gandalf says. "I can see why, her leaves are quite thinly spread, if you compare with some of the other trees. But if you gave me a few minutes, I could help her. I have a miraculous plant-nourishing-thing in my bag. Selma! I can help you! Did you hear what I said!"
"Legolas, let's get the hell out of here!" Merry says and they start to run with Gandalf in the middle.
"Selma!"
"Gandalf, I think it's time we had a talk. Come here and sit down next to me," Legolas says and sits down on a log.
Gandalf places himself cautiously next to him, "Ye-es?" he asks.
"Now look, I know you aren't… haven't been… a wood-elf… Let's say that you're not used being a wood-elf. And being surrounded by trees can be… confusing, when they all talk and make noises and such things."
Gandalf stares at Legolas hand, which happens to be on his shoulder, "Now look, Mr. Legolas, I don't know what you're up to but I can tell that I don't like it."
"Gandalf, I'm trying to comfort you. I can see that you're overwhelmed by the sound of the trees, but you must learn to only listen when you need information or if you want to hear them. It's not good for your health if you every second of the day hear interesting news of what a maple did in the other side of the forest or what you can do if your leaves are starting to look brownish."
"What was that? My, my Alexander! That's no way to talk to a lady! You apologise this instant! Can you repeat that, Louise? My friend here was talking." Gandalf laughs, "Now now, you can be quite a handful. How I keep my moss this thick and soft. I comb through it every day. But I'm must say that yours is a spectacular green colour. Is it you're real colour?"
Legolas grabs Gandalf by his shoulders and shakes him, "Gandalf," he hisses. "Do not listen to them, or you will get the tree-sickness."
"What's that?" Merry whispers.
"If you listen to the trees and listen and listen you will eventually become crazed. You will think that you're a tree. You will stand like a tree. You will wonder why your hair won't fall off in the fall and why you can't drink water with your feet. There was an Elf I knew once, he ripped his hair off every fall and cried when it grew back in the winter."
"How is he now?"
"No one knows. The last time someone saw him was when he walked into the forest, saying he is going to find his real mother. He said he is going to ask her who his father is, so he can chop him down because believes that he became a freak because he didn't get enough of father's-love when he was young. He believes it's his father's fault he didn't develop into a normal tree. Maybe he's still wandering around in the forest of Mirkwood, axe in hand, calling out to his tree-father."
Merry gasps.
"But I have heard that they have seen a tree with white bark and unnatural leaves. They say the leaves look like hair. They say it looks like the tree has a face, and they say the tree stands beside a chopped of tree and it looks like the tree is smiling," Legolas finishes, whispering.
"Oh no! We can't let that happen to Gandalf-"
Suddenly Gandalf places a hand on Merry's mouth, "Sssch. The trees just told me; We're not alone. The White Wizard approaches."
Leave a review. Come on, make my day. ;) (There's supposed to be a line between Gandalf's line: "Selma!" and Legolas line:"Gandalf, I think it's time we had a talk" and there's supposed to be equal marks between AragornGollum and so on.Ifthey're not there, I apologise. QuickEdit isn't really doing what I want it to do...)
