Chapter 2 is here!
"Get off me!" Sledgehammer yelled as he threw me off his back. I can't believe it! Sledgehammer, the evil mass murderer was in my house! I know most of you wouldn't find this amazing and wonderful, but you aren't a sugar addict who has psychological problems.
"Sledgehammer! What are you doing in my house?" I asked. He cocked his head and stared at his surroundings.
"I don't know. Last time I chacked, I was in London in the courthouse in front of the concert hall," he said as he looked around my room some more. I still stood there, too shocked to speak. I then realized that he was no longer in my room. I ran out to find him lifting up the TV and looking at the dust bunnies under it. Wait, how long have those kudos been under there? I don't even like kudos! Ignoring the mold covered cookies I turned my attention to the killer.
"If it is okay with you, I would like to request permission to glomp you excessively," I said happily and putting my usual 'I'm so stupid but I don't give a crap what you b-ds think of me' look. He stared at me with a confused look on his face, or what you could see of his face.
"What is 'glomping'," he asked. He raised his bloodstained hammer in defense. I thought for awhile, then an evil idea crawled into my evil, demonic mind of terror. Creative name, huh?
"Well, I'll show you!" I jumped backwards and ran around him in circles, making him dizzy. His eyes turned into swirls, and I saw my chance. I jumped on him and yelled my sacred battle cry!
"SLEDGEHAMMER! HHHHHHHUUUUUUUUUUUGGGGGGGGG MMMMMMMMMMEEEEEEEEEE!" He knocked me off of him and picked up his hammer and tried to charge me. I think I've pissed him off now...
"I was going to kill that wretch Alyssa, but you'll do just fine," he laughed. Now, I was in deep doodoo. He laughed his oh so attractive- I mean frightening laughter and swung at me! Luckily, I had jumped out of the way and tackled him again. I jumped up, giggled and ran away. He growled and chased after me.
I hid in the hall closet. I could've sworn I heard chase music or something... Maybe it was the fact the TV was still on. Either that, or...
"THE VOICES IN MY HEAD ARE BACK! MAKE THEM GO AWAY!" I yelled while clutching my head.I jumped out of the closet, landing on my assailant. As soon as I realized where I was, I squealed and hugged him before running off. I was very huggative today. Wait, is that even a word? Ignoring that thought, I quickly ran into my sister's room. I locked the door and ran into our bathroom and hid behing the shower curtain. I heard him run past me. I quietly crept out and ran into the den. No killer to glomp! I was safe for the time being, right? Wrong! He came from behind and knocked me into the fireplace. I was covered in soot and ash. Are soot and ash the same thing? You people don't have to answer all these questions. I'm just incredibly curious. Sledgehammer laughed again and slowly came at me.
Don't you hate those situations where a serial killer has you backed into a wall and advances very slowly as if to intimidate you? I don't! I see this as an oppurtunity to attempt stunts performed in CT3! I grabbed something from the fireplace.
"BACK ADORABLE HUNK DEMON!" I held my weapon in front of his face. He had a blank look on his face and he pulled it away from me. Apparently brushes used for cleaning furnaces aren't affective weapons. He snapped it in half and picked up his hammer.
"Oh crap..." I muttered. Glomping him might've saved my life, but when you're backed into a corner- or furnace in my case- it's hard to jump out at someone. I stood there and awaited my untimely doom. Yay! I used a big word today! He laughed again and raised his weapon. My brain began to work. Then I remembered the most important fighting rule to break: No hitting below the belt. In came my kung-fu fighting skills and I... Well, I think you know what's coming next. He breathed in sharply and fell back, unconcious. I needed to stick this guy somewhere. I managed, after much effort, to drag him upstairs and stuff him into the bite-sized attic door. I sighed and realized something. I unlocked the door and dragged his hammer out. I stuffed it in another attic door. I ran downstairs and began to think.
"Okay! Let's look at problems for today! 1) I illeagally smuggled a PS2 and copy of CT3 into my house. 2) Something went screwy with it and a serial killer wound up in my house! 3) I am in love... Well... actually it's just a crazed obsession. Like all those Sora and Riku fangirls. Oh wait, I'm one of them. 4) I don't know how to send him back. Welp! My day sucks already!" I yelled and plopped down on the couch. I sighed and turned on the TV. Maybe this would help me think. I put on Crank Yankers and thought. Now, M.C. Hammer up there came out of the PS2. I ran to the ruins of the demolished haven of glory (sniff). The disc and cartridge were still in one piece. Hmmm... Why was that? I was going to use the upstairs computer, but then I remembered the hunk in the closet. I went in and used my dad's laptop.
I put the disc in and scanned it. The screen turned an eerie green, that kinda resembled green koolaid. An odd symbol appeared on it. I recognized it as the symbol that appeared when Alyssa Hamilton aquired the bow. But what did it mean?
"Ow... my brain hurts..." I decided to go to the only place I could unwind and think. But first, I had to relocate the Hammer's hammer...
To be continued...
