A/N: Sorry it took so long and is so long after X-Mas. Stupid homework and projects and stuff.
PS- I want it to be known that I am Jewish and not very religious Jewish at that- the Biblical references made in this chapter are the work of Pennylane. So any mistakes made, blame it on her. Lol. Jk, I love ya Penny :-P
Disclaimer- I don't own Alias or It's a Wonderful Life, and one would hope that you don't really think I wrote the Bible. Lol. I also will not take credit for the writing of "In My Life," as it belongs to four of the greatest names in music history.
Chapter Four
Holy shit, I really am cracking. "Um...
excuse me?"
"Excuse you? No. I will not excuse your behavior." She
parodies me. "Ooh… I wish I were never born. I have such a horrible life.
Woe is me."
She subsequently quips, "At least
you don't live in Africa and are infected with AIDS! Look Hun, I've heard this
rhetoric before. Actually, it's kind of my specialty. Now there are a lot of
people, I'm sure you can think of a couple that fit this description, that have
a right to think this. But you don't have this rite. Think of all the good you
have done; think of what the life of your friends and family would be without
you!"
"Alright.... Okay. If your goal here is to sufficiently terrify
me, you've succeeded. Now please, I'm going to try to stay calm about this, but
please give me a clear explanation of who you are and what you're talking
about," I try to remain calm, speaking in a clear, direct tone like they
taught me to do with terrorists and potential threats when I first started with
the Agency.
"I already told you that," she sighs, exasperated. "I'm an
Angel."
"You told me that already! And I
want to know what the hell you mean!"
"'What the hell I mean?' For the love of Boss, do you need it
spelled out for you? A-N-G-E-L. If we want to get technical, I'm a member of
the Cherubim Order of Angels, which is a fancy name for Guardians." She
smiles and takes a seat next to me. "I specialize in "code red"
cases. I've taken it upon myself to be your personal Guardian. So, naturally,
with the events of tonight, I thought I'd pay you a visit."
"You're my Guardian Angel?"
"Yes, kind of like you are to Miss Bristow." She slyly responds.
"Of course, every person in the world doesn't have their own personal
Guardian Angel, because most people go through live without any need for divine
intervention. However, I've been following you for a few years now."
Holy s--t. "Oh my God. You're f--king insane! You've been stalking
me?!"
She laughs, I mean, really laughs. She is laughing at me and she is
supposed to be my Guardian Angel. I don't this is a laughing matter. "You
sound like I've been watching you in the shower. No. I am not that type of
Angel. Grant it, I know a few like that. I hadn't updated your case in about
two years. I haven't been 'stalking' you. Trust me, if I was to be 'stalking'
anyone, it would be a certain American living in France..."
"Okay. Can I ask why have you been watching me at all?"
"Because, I'm your Guardian Angel, Silly; it's my job. I am here
now, because you and Miss Bristow are Soul Mates. Thus, part of my job is to
ensure that you remain... mated. You made my life easier by doing my job for
me. However, something went wrong. God played nasty trick, and now I am here to
fix Boss's quagmire."
Whoa. "What do you mean Miss Bristow and I are Soul Mates? That's just a
theory created by novelists and greeting card writers."
"No, it's not. Soul Mates are very real, and very rare. It's a
privilege to be your generation's Soul Mates. It's something we take a lot of
pride in the Kingdom Come."
"I wouldn't know. Any desire to clarify?"
She quotes the first book of Genesis, Chapter Two, to me. "Then the
LORD Yahweh said, "It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make
him a helper fit for him.... So the LORD Yahweh caused a deep sleep to fall
upon the man, and while he slept took one of his ribs and closed up its place
with flesh; and the rib which the LORD Yahweh had taken from the man he made
into a woman and brought her to the man. Then the man said, 'This at last is
bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, because she
was taken out of Man.' Therefore a man leaves his father and his mother and
cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh."
She pauses letting the Old Testament's poetry seep into me. "Even
though Adam and Eve disobeyed Boss, he still loved them. As homage to the
mortal Mother and Father, unto each generation a pair of, what you morals call,
Soul Mates is born. Boss crafts a man, and from his rib, he crafts a woman. The
pair is connected for eternity; it is their destiny. This practice has been
happening since the dawn of time, and will happen until the end of existence.
Do you understand or do you need further clarification?"
Suddenly, I feel the need to spit her sarcasm back at her. "No, no, no, I get it perfectly. Sydney is my rib. Complimentary, really, knowing she could easily
snap all of mine in two. I have the privilege of being the one man in a century
to have an ex girlfriend made out of a bone. So who else got this honor? Romeo
and Juliet?"
"You mock me."
" 'Don't throw stones when your windows are glass.' Doesn't it say
that in the Bible somewhere?"
"The Bible says a lot of things."
"One would hope. It's the history and future of our entire race.
But I was partially serious before. Enlighten me, just whose footsteps are Sydney and I following? I need some context here if I'm going to
understand the magnanimity of what you're telling me."
"Well... Mr. History Buff, you should know that Romeo and Juliet
are fictionalized. Soul Mates take form in every way possible. Some do great
things, some live normal, blissful lives. But, if you want a name, you know
John Adams?"
"Not personally."
She smirks. "I should hope not. I've been afraid if you
claimed you did. However, I meant, do you know of him."
"He was our president, circa 1800."
"Tsk Tsk, Mr. Vaughn, he was our second president from 1797 to
1801." She is such a smart-ass. "He also was married to a lovely
woman, Abigail, who was his Soul Mate."
I've always hated American History. "Ok... well
they stayed together, didn't they? No big f--k up in their bliss. Last I heard
she stayed conscious long enough for him to not marry someone else. I used to
think Syd and I were... meant to be, in a sense, but I guess I was wrong. I
think you've got the wrong ribcage, God doesn't make mistakes like this."
She sighs again. She is really beginning to get on my last nerve. "Oy vei. I will agree with you. Boss lost his mind with this one,
but it was your decision to marry. You should have known better. You should
have known she was alive. Don't blame God for your folly."
She huffs in a tiss. "And.... Where the hell do you come off
saying 'No big f--k up in their bliss'? You should take a closer look at John
and Abby, my dear. You might be inspired by how much 'f--k ups' they went
through to be happy. Did you know they were separated for FIFTEEN years of
their marriage together? Did you know that when John was gone Abigail suffered
from severe depression? However, both of them sacrificed their total bliss to
better your country! Don't take history son lightly, my dear." She shakes
her head. "No f--k ups, my ass."
"Alright! Sorry! I just... This isn't the kind of thing that happens
everyday. I'm a little overwhelmed. I'm sorry if that's a surprising concept
for you."
"Okay. Fine. You are forgiven."
I pause, a question that had been brewing inside me beginning to rise over the
surface. "...Can I ask you something? Free of sarcasm?"
She seems to almost soften a little. "Yes."
"Do these... Soul Mates... ever not find each other?"
She smiles, but doesn't answer.
"Do they ever die apart?" I ask after another pause.
"Don't worry, Hun, you and Sydney are not going to break any records."
I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I choose to let it go and I nod
slowly, looking down at my feet and picking at a piece of pealing leather on
the chair's armrest. "So... you had a lesson to teach me or
something?"
She chuckles. "Or something. You're a smart lad. I am
surprised you haven't figured it out yourself."
"Sorry, I've been a just a little distracted."
"Uh- huh."
"So... what is it?"
"What is what?"
"The lesson."
"What subject do you want to be enlightened in?"
Alright, I've had quite enough of this for one insane evening. "WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HERE? Look, I get that you want to show me that
'I matter,' yada, yada, yada. But what I don't know is: how the hell to you
expect to do that? I'm still drawing a blank here."
She shrugs. "I don't know either, Hun. Everyone one is
different; I still haven't figured out with you. I suppose I'll just have to
play the whole 'show you life without you' game again."
My ears perk up. She said that with too much... too much of something I can't
quite place in her tone. And suddenly, everything pops into place. "Again?"
Katherine bites her lip. "Again, yes, of course again. I mean do
you honestly believe you were the first person to wish they'd never been born?"
I shake my head. "You didn't say it in that context. You've
recently done this before with someone connected to me, haven't you?" I begin
to think out loud. "It makes sense now.
Why else would you want to watch me for all those years? I mean, according to
you Sydney and I are a precious commodity where you come from, but how'd we
become such a concern for you personally?"
Her eyes dart down, "Because, as I said before, in the
Kingdom Come we take our Soul Mates seriously."
"Still... why you? Why are you playing my Guardian? Why is it your
specialty to help people like me? Millions of people have died and presumably
gone to heaven. Anyone could be helping me. Hell, my father could be helping
me, which would make more sense. Unless... you've had experience in my area
specifically. Have you helped Soul Mates with this before? John or Abigail? Is
that why you feel so strongly about them?"
"Well, first off, I believe they are the archetype for a near-perfect
marriage; and they are exceedingly important figures in our countries history;
and they were dear friends."
It's all flying into place, and I know she's trying to steer me away from it. "You didn't answer my question. You said yourself I'm smart lad.
Don't f--k with me."
"I did answer your question. You asked why I feel so strongly about
Abigail and John."
"That's not all I asked."
"No, that is what you asked."
I sigh. "It is but I also asked..."
Suddenly, memories of that last Christmas with Sydney hit me full force.
*~"Those are for my parents...I was actually debating for a while whether or not I should give them to them. But lately I've been realizing... they are my parents and I wouldn't be here without them. And regardless of everything, I know they care about me."~*
----
*~"Anya."
"What?"
"Anya. That's your twin sister."
"Yes. How did you... What else did Eric tell you?"~*
----
*~"Did something ever happen to you that you can't explain?
Something that defies logic and reason?"
Before he can get a word out, the lights suddenly snap off with a whir. The
plastic disco ball illuminates and begins to turn, casting the rainbow lights
all around the walls. It's not even plugged in.
Alarmed, I place it down on the floor and look back up at her. "Yes. Yes it
has."~*
----
*~Vaughn,
Last night I was at my lowest,
my most depressed. I wasn't sure if I wanted to be living anymore. But against
the offer you made me when we first met, I ignored the fact that I have your
number. You see, for those dark moments last night, just those moments but
still for far too long, I doubted the strength of our relationship.
That was stupid and I'm sorry. You've been there for me every time I needed
you, and for that I'm deeply grateful. It was wrong of me, even for a second,
to think that what we have is in illusion.
I need you in my life, and I care about you more than you'll ever know. What we
have, the things we share... it's one of the most important things I have in my
life right now and I want you to know that. I don't know how I would have ever
gotten this far without you.
So again, I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Merry Christmas, you deserve
the best one anyone could have.
All my love,
~SB~*
----
And everything... I mean everything is so abruptly clear...
suddenly, I know exactly what happened. My stomach rushes to my throat, "Oh my God. It was Sydney, wasn't it? That Christmas the year we got together....
All the things she knew about me... the card... oh my God."
"Don't use the Lord's name in vain."
"Don't preach the Commandments to me! I'm right, aren't I? Sydney went through this. You helped her. You made her realize
how much she mattered." I feel queasy. If I wasn't sitting, my legs would give
way, "Oh my... how did I not realize? Why didn't I help her?"
She remains dedicated to her goal of evading my suspicions but she knows she's
trapped. "Those, Hun, are rhetorical questions I can't
answer."
I have to hear her say it, "Please, just tell me. Did you come to Sydney on Christmas three years ago? Did she wish she were never
born? Did she honestly think I... we... we all could live without her?"
She sighs, looks down, looks at me again. Stares for a moment or two, then
speaks. "Yes. I came to her three Christmases ago. She
was at the Pier, and she was seriously thinking about selfishly throwing away
God's greatest gift."
Tears are brimming to the surface, searing. My heart is pounding and my throat
suddenly feels choked. "She... she was going to jump. She was
going to kill herself. Oh my... why didn't she come to me? I could have helped
her. I could have... she almost died that night. She... thank you. You saved
her life. Thank you."
"I didn't do anything. She came to her senses only after she
discovered what your life would have been without her."
I gasp. "She... she did? I mattered that much to
her?"
She places a comforting hand on my upper arm. Her fingers feel like warm static
electricity from a TV after it's on for a while. "Hun, you are
her Soul Mate. You are the only thing that matters to her; and she is the only
thing that matters to you. It's how you're built."
I sniffle and try to regain my composure. Or what little I had of it before,
anyway. "She... she's not the only thing that matters to me..."
"No, I suppose you're right."
I don't know why I want so badly to disprove her belief. I suppose it scares me
to think that I really could have lost all that Kate is saying Sydney and I
are. "Well then there's further proof. We can't be Soul Mates. You said
they're built to only care about each other."
What she says next shocks me possibly more than any other answer she could have
given me. "'But of all these friends and lovers, there is no
one compare with you. And these memories lose their meaning when I think of
love as something new. Though I know I'll never loose affection for people and
things that went before, I know I'll often stop and think about them. But in my
life, I love you more.'"
"The Beatles," I state, pointing out
what is obviously clear to her.
"Good to see you know your music, even if you don't have a clue
about the history of your county. Anyway, point being, those are extremely wise
words that you should be able to clearly relate to. For it would be no fun to
go through the world only caring about one person. Sydney cares deeply about her father, and her mother, and her
friend, Will, this is all true. But when push comes to shove, her affections
for them don't amount to a hill bean in this crazy world, when it comes to what
she feels, and how far she would go for you. Now, is this that a more accurate
description of your feelings toward Miss Bristow?"
I almost automatically say yes, then pause. "I'm married.
My wife should be my first priority."
She scoffs. "Yes, you did make a mockery of the sacred
vows, didn't you? Key words, Mr. Vaughn: 'Should be.'"
After all she's putting me
through, I cannot let her grasp at this last straw, "Mockery! I
love Lauren! Don't think you can just fly down here and question that!"
Katherine shivers, thrown off by Lauren's name as if I'd said something
very vulgar to her. "Don't speak her name in my presence."
"What exactly do you have against my wife?"
Katherine looks horrified. "Other than her eyebrows, turtlenecks
in Los
Angeles, and
her inability to show emotion, you said it yourself, Hun."My Wife." Right
there! Penalty on the play! She is not your wife, she is an obstacle. And she
is making my formerly trouble-free job a pain in the ass."
Anger courses through me. She's gone too far, and I'm going to put her in her
place. "Alright, look- I will not have you come down here and insult the woman I am married to!
You don't even know her! All you know
is that she made your perfect little
paradise a little bit stressful. Well you know what? Welcome to the real world,
'Hun!'" Whew. Glad I got that
out.
But Katherine doesn't even seem phased by my sudden outburst. She just
looks closely at me, then a thoughtful expression overtakes her features.
"Of course... I actually don't believe you are technically married...
Because, every marriage has to be approved by Boss, and thankfully we're not on
a twenty-four hour day, because he'd never get it done. I don't believe he
approved his... I mean... "
Katherine snaps her fingers and a giant book
appears in her lap; she begins to thumb through it. "Why would he... If he
knew what was going on, he would have called me to talk some sense into you....
When were you married again? April 1st, right?...."
"What are you doing?"
"Nope... You never mind... It's July 1st. Let's see... Let's see...
Vail, Valley, Vance, Vanhorn, Vaniotis, Varrier, Vassar.... Nope, I don't see
your name on the list. You're not married. I'm sorry. Now, go home; quick like
a bunny and get a "divorce." ...However, I don't think this is
exactly what Boss had in mind when he said I would find a way. He said a way,
not find a loophole."
I am so utterly confused. My head begins to pound. I squeeze my eyes shut and
bring my hands to my forehead, shaking my head. "I. Am.
Married. To. Lauren. Reed." Pause. "I. Love. Her."
"Do. You. Really? You seem like you are trying to convince not
only me, but yourself."
She's right. But there's no way in hell I'm letting her know that. "I won't argue this with you."
She shrugs again, brushing it off. I'm beginning to hate when she does that
already. "Fine. Fine. Go back to your superficial life,
with your superficial wife, and superficial happiness."
"Can we get on with this please?" I ask, frustrated beyond
reason with this whole ridiculous fiasco.
"Sure... Your current life is right through those doors."
Katherine points. "Quick like a bunny, Hun. We can't 'get on with this'
until you get off your high horse and come to your senses."
I stare incredulously at the place she's gesturing to. "Through those
doors? Those doors only lead to a ticket office."
"No, they lead to your closet, which leads back to your room, and
your house. If you don't believe me, take a look."
I sigh. "Fine. Whatever's there can't be worse than
what I'm living with now."
She smiles a smile that makes me shiver, suddenly getting the feeling that she knows much, much more than I do about absolutely everything. "Whatever you say, Vaughny."
And she gets up, holding out a hand to help me stand. We stagger over the rubble to the door. Taking a deep breath, I open it and darkness engulfs me.
***
A/N: I know, horrible place to leave you at. I'll update soon though, or I'll try to. We're gonna have fun with poor 'Vaughny.' :-D
