Chapter Seven- Joy to the World (The Bitch is Gone) ;-)

I blink.

I blink again.

The scene around me doesn't change. I smell the old, cracked leather behind me and feel the cool twinge of abandonment and reminiscence in the air.

"Kate...?" I call out slowly, unsure of her presence, or existence, for that matter.

"Yah, Hun."

"What the hell just happened?"

"You had an Epiphany."

"An epiphany."

"In the truest and oldest sense of the word."

After a short inner debate, I decide against playing stupid. "This whole thing had nothing to do with my half assed 'wish to not exist,' did it?"

"Nun-uh." She shook her head and smiled

"And if I hadn't managed to have my 'Epiphany'?"

"Oh, C'mon!" She struts up to him, crosses her arms and get in his face. "You're not that thick. Don't even pretend to be that thick or stupid. You use to be fun, just remember that."

I manage a weak but genuine smile at this. "Yeah. I guess you're right."

"Of course I'm right. I'm an Angel, and a damn good one."

I laugh a little, unable to help the feeling swelling inside me that a huge weight is about to lift, and something good is finally going to happen. "So, what am I supposed to do now? You go back off to...." I look up towards the ceiling, "And I just, stay and...."

She scoffs, "Maybe you are as stupid as you look. You were willing to spend an eternity in Hell with your Soul Mate, yet back on Earth you are asking me what to do? This is where you go get the girl! I can get you a white horse if you really want to make a production about it, but go, quick like a bunny, go!"

"I'm still legally married, Katherine! Isn't that frowned upon where you come from?"

"I told you before, you dimwit! All marriages are blessed by The Boss and if it's not the big Book, they weren't Blessed and aren't legit as far as we're concerned! Plus, I'll talk to him for you, Okay. We're not going to send you to Hell because he was smoking crack with Lucifer again and decided to fck with your destiny. We screwed up -- you and Sydney were suppose to have Rambaldi to deal with, not that --" she stumbles over the word "-- her. Seriously, Hun. Stop being rational and follow your heart. Be spontaneous and crazy and unsafe. Run into your house and kiss her under the mistletoe as Lauren watches. Be bold!"

I laugh and shake my head. "I think maybe I'll do... some variety of that."

"Of course you will, now, I have something for you." She has a naughty look in her eye and smiles.

I eye her suspiciously, slightly concerned. "...What?"

"I did a little bit of Christmas shopping for you." She holds outs both of her hands and two presents appear. In her left hand, it's a small jewelry box, something a bracelet would come in. And in her right hand is a dangles a blue bag with snowmen, which looks exactly like....

No. It can't be. It's impossible. But then... so is everything else that has happened tonight.
"That's... is that..."

"Fire doesn't destroy everything. And if she asks, tell her you found it in the rubble -- which is the truth, because we are technically standing in the rubble. And this" -- she shakes the wrapped box. "Is the card to the best divorce lawyer in Los Angeles. And... he's already working on your case. Tell him Kate sent you." She winks.

I take both gifts in my hands, holding the handles of the bag tightly, afraid that the slightest movement will break its already tattered skeleton. It's been almost four years, but I can remember the feel of my fingers running over the engraved designs as I had first picked it up in that dusty antique store. I can see the dim silver glint as I had slid it into the smiling snowmen bag. For a moment, my words are trapped. "...Thank you."

"You're welcome, Hun. I polished it up a little and mended the glass, but it's the same glass and the same picture. Now, this time I'm not lying. If you walk right through the office door, it will lead you back to bedroom."

I nod. "Ok." I begin to walk towards the battered door for the second time tonight. Before reaching it, I turn back around. "Thanks again, Kate. For everything." I smile. "Merry Christmas."

She follows me and gives me a kiss on the cheek. "No... go make it merry." She turns to leave, "Oh," she spins around in her flippant manner. "Kate, it's a good name. You know, lots of strong woman were named Kate. Just, something for you to think of... you might need to think about sooner than you think. Merry Christmas, Hun." And with that she walks away and disappears.

Still smiling, I place my hand on the knob and, taking a deep breath, I turn it and open the door. A breeze flutters past my face as I shut my eyes and step inside, finally ready to confront the life on the other side.

Next chapter:

I push through the clothes and emerge in my bedroom again. This time, every bit is exactly the way it was before I'd left. I clutch the gifts in my hands, and step carefully out to my doorframe. I don't hear Sydney, or Lauren for that matter. I check the clock next to my bed. It's two hours after I had initially left.

I leave the room and find Lauren sitting on the couch watching a holiday movie on TV, I don't bother to notice which. "Hi."

"Hi. When did you get back?"

"A couple minutes ago. I came back in through the back door," I pause, "Where's Sydney?"

"She went home. Said to tell you merry Christmas and thanks for having her."
I nod. The small box in my left hand is burning blisters into my skin. For a couple of seconds, we just stare at each other.

"What's that?"

I put down the blue bag on the chair behind me and grip the box more tightly. "I... um... it's your... your Christmas gift." I manage to confess as I slowly hand it out to her.

She smiles, "Let me get yours..." She gets up, but I put my hand on her arm. I have to end this now.

"No."

She looks at my queer, and takes the box. She unwraps it, opens the box, and lifts the cards from it. She drops box. I hold in my breath, waiting for her response. "I never knew you were this... creative."

"I'm sorry, Lauren," it's a half-lie, but she at least deserves the courtesy. "I just can't live this way anymore."

"And you thought..... Merry Christmas, I want a divorce? You.... So that's it? Not even a separation? You want a divorce?"

"A separation would only be a longer process to inevitably reach the same conclusion."

"Because you're still in love with that... little bitch."

She rises from the couch and I glare at her with eyes I haven't felt myself glare with since I was told two years ago that no further searches for Sydney were being sanctioned. "Lauren, I understand what this must be like for you," I tell her honestly, "But never use a term like that to describe Sydney in my presence. EVER."

"I'm sorry, you're right, that was uncalled for. I should have said... I should have said that little slut, or maybe whore, or cunt. I am you wife, you ungrateful bastard. Doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"In a way I guess I deserved that. But she does not. Lauren, this situation is not fair to anyone, but it's certainly not fair or acceptable to speak of Sydney that way, and there's no way in hell I'll tolerate it. You helped me through a rough time, I'm grateful to you for that, I'm sorry things turned out this way... but this is just how it has to be. And if you're unable to discuss anything further like a mature adult, and you're going to insult Sydney so harshly, I suggest you get out of this house."

"No. If you want to be with her, then you leave. Go crawling back to her like the dog you are."

I nod. "Have a good Christmas, Lauren. We'll talk later."

I leave the house, not looking back. What's ahead is much more appealing.