Those who cannot remember the past are condemned to repeat it.
December 21, 2021
In the early hours of the morning, long before the light of dawn began to creep across the skyline, Max fell into an exhausted sleep beside Alec. Her body didn't usually require sleep, but the mental and emotional stress of recent days had finally taken its toll on her, and she gratefully surrendered to the lure of a dreamless rest. And when the light of the winter sun reached in to touch their placid faces with delicate warmth, Max and Alec still slept on.
Original Cindy looked across the room to where the X5's lay on Joshua's mattress, concern marring her features. Max had been when Alec lost consciousness so soon after regaining it. She had never seen her friend in such a state.
During the few brief minutes in which he had pulled himself out from the darkness, Alec had been unaware of his surroundings. Max reached his side and held his hand, but he had looked at her in confusion, as if she were a stranger. Nothing anyone could say would break her wordless silence when his eyes closed once more.
Original Cindy tried to maintain positive thoughts.
Once they awoke, everything would be back to normal - as far as normal goes. After all, Christmas was only a few days away and her two X5's had an appointment with the Mistletoe Fairy to keep. Things just had to come correct.
"Here, eat this."
Cindy looked up at Joshua, who had been asked by Match to rustle up one of his infamous macaroni dishes. It kept his mind off the situation to some extent although by the looks of the burnt saucepan scrapings mixed in with the meal…
"Thanks doggy-dog."
He took a seat beside her and OC tried not to think the words death watch as they ate in silence. Instead she smiled at the wisecracks Alec would surely hit them with once he woke to find Max beside him.
"Josh, why did he go all 'Manticore' yesterday?" OC placed the empty place beside her at last and turned to her friend. "I know Max said some harsh words, but it's not like they aint argued before?"
The dog-man knew his tricks and treats friend and knew there was a darkness within him - within all of Manticore's creations. It would always be there, like the magma, just waiting for the opportunity to explode to the surface.
Except in the case of the transgenics, this molten lava was called Manticore.
"You remember my dinner party? Alec was in the basement playing father's piano?" Joshua twiddled the fork between his fingers, half-wishing he didn't know the inside of people so well. Well enough to sometimes feel their pain as if it were his own.
"Yeah. Can't forget that."
"Manticore made us to be predators. We can't run from it, we can't escape it. There's a killer inside all of us - it's in our genes."
Joshua thought of the way Alec had looked when he was strangling the life out of Max. The X5 hadn't known who she was. It was as if he had snapped into something beyond even Manticore's expectations.
"You see Max and Alec living their life in the outside world the way everyone else does. Laughing, hanging out... You see them as normal people." He smiled sadly as he ran his hands over his face. "But they're not normal. Alec has been a Manticore soldier for twenty years. It'll always be in him. Just like the predator."
Cindy wore a thoughtful frown as she looked again to Max and Alec where they lay in sleep, looking for all the world like innocent youths. Chameleons.
"Well, they're still family to me Boo. Be they trained killers or not. And ya know you my family too. " She put her arm around Joshua's broad shoulders and rested her head against him.
"And whether he's Alec or 494 when he wakes up, we'll figure this bitch out."
Max wasn't sure what woke her. Maybe it was the voices of Joshua and OC on the fringe of conscious, or maybe it was the smell of food that roused her body at last. With her head resting on Alec's chest, she snuggled closer, pretending for a moment that today was the 25th and soon Terminal City would be celebrating it's first Christmas.
She felt Alec shift beneath her and sat up, her pulse suddenly pounding .
"Alec?"
He rolled his head to one side and frowned slightly, as if trying to shake of the remnants of a dream. Max sat unmoving, unsure who would be looking at her once he opened his eyes.
"Alec, wake up." She gave him a gentle nudge and his eyes flew open to stare at the ceiling before drifting across the room to rest upon her.
"What time is it?"
A hesitant smile crossed Max's lips, she looked over at Joshua and OC who had stopped their conversation to sit in anxious wait.
"Well, judging from the empty plates over there, I'd say we just missed lunch."
Alec didn't return her smile, but instead pulled himself into a sitting position and looked around the room. Finally his eyes came back to Max, and the heavy bruising around her throat. He winced slightly and Max wasn't sure if it was due to the sight of her injury, or because of the large bruise that decorated his own head.
"So, mind telling me who you are today?" Max knew it seemed an odd question, but she had to ask it. She still wasn't sure and she couldn't bear the wait for enlightenment.
He raised an eyebrow quizically. "Alec. ...Ya named me, remember?" And then, as if unsure now as to which alternative-reality he'd woken into, he asked, "Wait, don't tell me you're another of Max's clones?"
"In your dreams." Max broke into a smile, sure now that Alec had truly returned to them. "What say we see if they left us anything to eat?"
Alec nodded and began to rise from the bed before grasping his head as blackness closed in on him, and returning to the mattress once more.
"Are you okay?" Max knelt at his side and gently touched his face, but he flinched and pulled his head away. "OC, can you get Match?"
"Already doing it boo." Cindy was half way across the floor to the next room where Match had gone to rest, having attending to both Alec and Max for the past 24 hours.
"How do you feel?" Max didn't know what to do. She tried to reach out to him again but he gave her a warning look and she folded her hands nervously across her chest.
"Well, I feel like something the cat brought in and then brought back up. Put it that way." Alec closed his eyes for a moment and then stood up again. This time, the blackness stayed away.
"I'm sorry Alec, I -"
"Hey you're back in the land of the living at last!"
Alec turned to the new voice as Match walked briskly across the room and came to stand before him. "Still feel a bit foggy huh?"
Slowly, he nodded his head. "That's an understatement.What the hell happened?"
"You don't remember?" Match and Max exchanged glances, unsure where to begin - and how much to reveal. Joshua saved them by stepping forward. "Sorry buddy, I uh... it was an accident."
"What, you knocked me out?" Alec looked incredulous. "What with? A tire iron?"
"No uh, my fist."
"You had a fair bit to drink." Max quickly intercepted. "Don't ya remember? Joshua was trying to uh... help you sleep. Poor boy didn't realise his own strength."
Alec blanched as he pressed tentantively against the bruise. "No shit."
Original Cindy flashed Max a smile and returned her attention to Alec. "Think you two can sort ya shit out now without anyone havin' to cuff you together?"
"There's nothin' to sort out." Alec glanced at Max and returned her smile with a nonchalant look and a shrug. "Far as I know, it's business as usual."
Max's smile fell as he turned away and wandered to Joshua's kitchen. Once out of hearing, she turned to Cindy and frowned. "S'pose I asked for that huh?"
OC shook her head. "He just needs time."
After he'd eaten, Joshua tried to capture Alec's interest in the decorations he'd been making for the Christmas party. The X5 smiled and nodded as he looked over Paper Mache angels painted with swirls of light and wreaths made of wire and decorated with coloured paper, but Max couldn't help but wonder if he would have preferred to inspect the bright sheen of well polished combat boots, than the light-hearted craftsmanship of Terminal City's artist in residence. And all too soon he made an excuse to leave and disappeared into the fading light of day.
Max tried to follow him but it seemed he had vanished with a puff of smoke as soon as he passed through the door. Returning to the room alone, she tried to push down the niggling doubts. "Maybe we should've told him the truth? Maybe he's not out of the woods yet?"
The occupants of the room were silent for a moment, each wrestling with their own guilt on not being straight up with Alec. Original Cindy stepped foward and slung an arm around her friend's shoulders. "He'll be fine Boo. The boy just needs a bit of time to himself."
December 22, 2021
Alec sat on the floor in the middle of his old apartment in Seattle's Sector Four, and stared into the thin air before him. For months he had maintained the rent payments to keep this place ready for the day when it was finally safe to return. But he now doubted such a day would ever come. And even if it did, he realised now that he didn't belong an an ordinary's world.
Transgenics would never be accepted among the humans. At best they'd find themselves confined to some kind of reservation and kept under control - to ensure they didn't cause harm to, or contaminate the human race.
As graceful as a cat, Alec rose to his feet and wandered into the bedroom. He'd remained awake all night, his mind deep in thought; churning over all the options life held before him. And all the options he'd forever be denied.
They say what you don't know, can't hurt you. When Alec had been in Manticore, he'd never found reason to questioned his existence. For the first nineteen years he was a dutiful, obedient soldier. A robot. A clone. Always following orders, never caring for anything except fulfilling the mission and setting an example to those around him.
--- flashback --- >
"Okay grunts, I'd like you to look closely here at X5-494. Does he look all that different from you?"
"No Sir!" Twenty five voices answered their Sergent in unison.
"Does he seem to have X-ray vision, the ability to fly, or a pair of magical ruby red slippers on his feet?"
"No Sir!" Indeed, he appeared to have none of these things.
"But yet, he is better than you. Can anyone tell me why?"
"No Sir!" No one would have dared to even attempt an explanation.
"Well, how about I tell you?"
The group of soldiers stood in silence, waiting for the Sergent to continue.
"X5-494 is a better soldier than you because every time he competes the task set before him, he beats his own record. He follows orders without hesitation and without conscience. If I were to tell him to bring me the heads of twelve Catholic orphans, he would do so."
Pacing before the soldiers, the Sergent studied each face before him, looking for the slightest twitch of defiance in his men.
"Now, I know each one of you would carry out the very same task. But the difference is this: you would hesitate before pulling the trigger. You would find within yourselves, a quiet voice of doubt. You would wonder if perhaps, this was wrong."
A soldier in the front row twitched and the Sergent halted before him, his face so close he could see the pores in his skin. He stared straight into the soldiers eyes although his words were directed at everyone as he raised his voice.
"You do not allow yourselves to doubt your orders! You do not wonder, if perhaps this is wrong! You are soldiers! You do not have minds of your own! You are not human - you are machines! You will never belong in the world among the ordinary every day people of America!"
Stepping back, the Sergent turned to 494, who stood facing the group, his eyes empty, his face blank. This man was everything Manticore had hoped to achieve. The perfect soldier.
--- end flashback --- >
It was only during the Berrisford Mission that 494 had begun to wonder about his place in the world, and why his life was so different from everyone else's. And so wrong. The close relationship he had witnessed between Rachel and her father had planted that seed of doubt into his head. Their loving interaction made him see the grand faults that existed in his own upbringing, and caused him to experience emotions he had never before felt. Inside his mind, 494 began to question his superiors.
He began to crack the mould he had been cast in.
With his new found human emotions battling within him, he failed a mission at last. But as much as Manticore punished him, they could never put their humpty dumpty back together again. The cracks of conscience were irreversable. And although they made him forget about the Berrisfords, a part of him deep inside always knew that one day, he would break away.
But where was his niche? He had tried for so long to fit in with the ordinary world. To forget Manticore. But his life revolved around Max - his connection to Manticore. His friends were Max's friends, his job - Max's job. Max's life became his own. His name was given to him by her. He had escaped the rules and regulations of Manticore, to find himself following those of the rebel X5. It seemed as if he'd never truly escape his prison. If anything, what with coming to Terminal City and training kids to be soldiers, he seemed intent to rebuild it.
Who was he?
Max entered head quarters to find Joshua, Dix and Original Cindy standing around the table, indulging in light-hearted conversation. They had been putting up yet more decorations and there was more festive spirit in the room than Times Square on Christmas Eve.
She looked around the room, hoping to see Alec. He was no where in sight. Unfortunately, Logan was. He stood in a corner, deep in conversation with Match who looked as if she'd rather be moon-walking with Michael Jackson's corpse.
Upon seeing Max, the red-haired X5 politely escaped the cyber-journalist and approached her.
"Hey Max, who's Bessie?"
"Bessie?" Max frowned. "That's Logan's car. Why?"
"Hmm. That would explain it then." She grinned. "He named his car Bessie? The guy's got some issues with the female gender I'd say."
Seeing the brunette was still waiting for an explanation, she stopped laughing and filled her in. "He wanted the gate opened so he could bring Bessie in."
Max's expression changed to one of surprise. "Did he say why?"
"Well, no. I figured Bessie was an incredibly large lady friend who couldn't fit through a gap in the fence."
Max laughed and wished with futility that this could have been the case. Then she thought of why he'd be bringing his vehicle in, and groaned. "I told him to leave Terminal City - not bring all his belongings and join the club!"
Match veiled her humour and attempted a sympathetic smile, then moved on towards the exit as Max walked over to Joshua and Dix.
"Hey kids, how's the decorating goi - , wow Josh, that's pretty cool…" Max picked up a large object made of layers and layers of wire, crisscrossed and interwoven into the shape of a star. "What's it for?"
"It's the star which led the wise men to the baby Jesus when..." OC stopped at the transgenics questioning looks.
"Huh?" Max looked back down at the star, as if it could explain what her friend was talking about.
"No Cindy." Joshua's expression turned serious as he pointed up at the ceiling high above them. "It's a star, yes. But it's also a signal light. Leading the transgenics to safety. This is where they have to come to. Our sanctuary - our home."
Cindy, Dix and Max stared at Joshua, mouth agape at the beauty of the statement. With his obscure and insightful talent for art, he was bring Christmas to them in a way that was undeniably unique, and much more meaningful then the mere giving and receiving of presents.
"That's really profound Joshua." Logan walked over to the small group and peered around Max at the object of their discussion. "But that's not what the star is supposed to represent."
"Has anyone seen Alec today?" Max decided to ignore Logan's remark and bring the topic of conversation to the more pressing issue.
Everyone in the room shook their heads. No one had seen him since he left Joshua's the previous day. Max felt dispair choke her in much the same way Alec's hand had a few days earlier.
"Nope. No Alec." Joshua paused the study of his newest creation to ponder upon the disappearance of his friend. He looked directly at Max. "He's confused. Hurt."
Max looked away, not wanting to read what she could see in her friend's eyes. Joshua was concerned for his friend, and she knew he was about to say something she really didn't want to hear.
Logan cleared his throat. "What's he confused about Joshua?"
The transhuman growled low in his throat, causing Logan to take a step back.
"Himself." He waved his hands in the air, and then his eyes fell upon the star. "Alec is lost. He can't remember how to find his way back from the darkness."
Alec lay on the bed, unable to sleep as his mind churned over and over his thoughts.
He wondered if he should leave Seattle and start life again. Away from Max, away from anyone who had ever known him as a transgenic. He just wanted to find a place where he would be accepted. A place he could call home.
But the idea of leaving Max and his friends tore him apart. He didn't know what to do. He couldn't stay here. This wasn't his home anymore. It never really had been. But where could he go?
As Max sped through the streets of Terminal City, she knew she would never find him here. Turning the motorbike round, Max drove towards one of the gates that opened onto an unpatrolled sidestreet and signalled for the transgenics guarding it to let her pass. She had a really bad feeling inside her, and it was growing worse by the minute.
She went to Crash. He wasn't there. Not bothering to check Jam Pony, Max headed to the Space Needle. He wasn't there either. After hunting high and low through Joshua's old house, she was at her wits end. What if he had left Seattle? What if he had been captured by White? Running to the bike, a thought occurred to her. It was now so obvious. He'd be back at his old place.
She pulled up outside his apartment and ran up the stairs until she reached his floor. The door stood wide open and she entered, her eyes sweeping the room as her senses picked up on his presence. Hope flared within her as she walked to his room. And promptly died as she found the room to be as empty as the rest of the places she had searched.
No longer knowing what else to do, Max sank to the floor, too shocked by his complete and utter absence to move. She stared down at her hands as a tear rolled down her face. She was too late. He had left. And by the way he had been acting these past few days - the way they had both been acting, he wasn't coming back. But she'd sit here and wait. Just in case he returned.
Sometime later, Max became aware of the growing darkness surrounding her.
She stood slowly, turned to the door and began to approach it. She couldn't keep telling herself he was going to return. He would have done so already.
Moments after Max drove away on her bike, Alec turned the corner and entered the building she had just departed from. Precariously balancing a box of beers on his knee as he fumbled to unlock the door he thought he'd left opened, Alec stepped into the room and immediately picked up on the scent of someone else.
Max.
She had been here. Why? Why would she bother to come looking for him? Something ignited inside him; a small flicker of light battled against the darkness and hopelessness within him. No one was here. Max had been, but now she had gone. Suddenly the beer had lost its appeal. It was pointless hanging around any longer.
As soon as Max walked down the corridor of her apartment building and towards her door, she knew something had changed. There was an odour of fresh pine in the air. She halted, the smell brought up an instant recollection of so many things she had no wish to remember. The night of the escape - running through the snow laden forest. And most of all, the day she'd thwarted Ben from murdering Father Destry - when she'd sat amid freshly crushed pine needles and forced herself to snap his neck. She hesitated outside the door, unsure if she wanted to step through.
At last, she made up her mind and opened the door. As soon as her eyes fell upon the Christmas tree in the center of the room, she wished she could change her mind and walk back out.
Logan was putting the finishing touches on a large pine tree. It was the most perfectly formed tree she had ever seen. Not a branch was in the wrong place, the decorations were colour co-ordinated to perfection and looked as if they had cost him a whole continent of starving children to buy.
Max felt as if she were in a living nightmare.
"What do you think you're doing?"
Recovering from her initial shock, Max strode over to the man and snatched from his hand the exquisite angel he had been about to place on the top of tree. He turned to her in shock as he noted the anger blazing in her eyes.
"Well, I brought you a tree. To replace that bit of kindling you had in here before." Logan reached out for the angel but she stepped back with a warning in her eyes.
"Where is my kindling now?"
Logan looked away in silence, his eyes lingering on the open window that looked into a narrow alley. Running to the window, Max leant out and saw the broken remains of the tree Alec had brought home for her. Scattered around it were the decorations Joshua's art class had put their hearts into.
Whirling around, she blurred to Logan and pushed him into the pine, sending them both crashing to the floor.
"Why? Why did you do it Logan? What gave you the right to come in here and destroy…" Her voice began to crack and she wrenched him to his feet. "Get out!"
He stood before her, puzzled at her over-reaction. Why would she rather have the branch?
"Look Max, I don't understand why you're so upset but -"
No, you don't understand! You never will! And if you don't get out now, I'm probably gonna regret what I'll do to you once the elation of doing it wears off!"
Logan paused to take in Max's flushed face, and the look of absolute seething rage written upon it, and stepped forward as he felt himself return her anger.
"Fine Max. I'll leave. You know, I've had it up to here with trying to second-guess you just because you're too damn scared to let open up of your own accord. This was my last-ditch effort to share some happiness with you. I won't bother wasting my time again."
Knocking into her shoulder as he passed, Logan slammed the door behind him, leaving silence in his wake.
Alone, Max spied an object on the ground and leant down to pick it up. It was the angel Alec had made for the top of the tree. The angel with a likeness to her face painted on it.
Holding the angel to her chest, Max sank to the ground and began to sob as the pain of loss - in more ways than one - came crashing in on her. Logan was right in one thing; she was too damn scared to let herself open up, and because of it, she'd lost Alec. And she hadn't even realised how much his loss would break her, until it was too late.
Arms wrapped around her and she looked up, startled, half thinking Logan had returned.
Instead, she found herself staring into a pair of wide hazel eyes set in a concerned face.
"Alec?"
He nodded. "Yeah Maxie. It's me."
Gently wiping the tears from her eyes with his thumbs, Alec leant forward and kissed her damp eyelids before drawing her to him in an embrace.
"Why'd you come back?" She spoke the words into his chest as she returned his hug. Relief caused as many tears to be shed as grief had previously.
"I dunno." Alec gently kissed the top of Max's head. "Guess I just saw the light."
