A/N: A special thank you to those who reviewed chapter seven. : P I knew those cruddy lyrics were a risky move. I promise this chapter will be better. There's more action anyway. And yes, I blame Mr. Bickles for the rewrite (especially the lyrics). So make sure to steer your angry, pitchfork toting mobs towards him—not me, the completely innocent author—him. And Timmy is actually twelve in this fic, it's been nearly a year since Twas the Wish Before Christmas when he was eleven so yeah, he's aged. And the other characters too. Chip is nineteen, Vicky is eighteen (and a half), Tootie's twelve, Norm's fifty-thousand (cause he rounds it up/down), etc. And thanks, I try to keep everyone in character, it's proven tricky when dealing with Phantom of the Opera. Timmy is kind of selfish but then again most kids can be, hopefully he'll grow out of it. Des isn't in this story, she's in the sequel...and Crocker too!
:Cosmo and Wanda poof into the room only to find it occupied by a group of idly chatting teens.:
Cosmo: :points at Troy: Hey, who are you?
Troy: :turns and spots Cosmo, appears shaken: Yo...floating...green-haired...dude?
:Troy stares suspiciously at his soda. Reggie just shrugs indifferently.:
Reggie: :shakes Wanda's hand as Troy pours out his soda: What's up? The name's Reggie.
Wanda: Uh—hi there—Reggie? Haven't seen you on the show before.
Camille: Don't mind us, we're just OCs.
Cosmo: :excitedly: Monkeys!
Bri: No man, OCs. We're more or less extras for when the author lady runs outta canon characters or needs a fill-in.
Wanda: :sighs: As if we didn't have enough to deal with.
:Cosmo floats over to Troy—who still thinks his soda was tampered with—and studies him quizzically.:
Cosmo: You don't look like a monkey.
Camille: :sly grin: You should see that zoo he calls an apartment.
:Troy glares at Camille. Cosmo grins obliviously and tries to give him a banana.:
Cosmo: Aw, nice monkey!
Phantom of the Music Biz: Genie Gypped
Chapter Eight: Plot Twists All Around!
It was now the final scene, the scene where Vicky would be whisked down into the Phantom's lair and forced to choose between her mysterious vocal trainer or the rich and dreamy producer Chevy.
Out in the audience Mr. Turner was teetering on the edge of his seat. "Oh wow, I have no idea who that mysterious phantom could be, but he sounds delicious!"
"Let's move on shall we?" Timmy spoke in a bored tone, "This story's weird enough already."
The music began with Chip gesturing towards the recording studio above. He looked particularly upset as he went on about how Vicky owed all her stardom and wealth to him.
You now star here
Due to the deal you cannot dis
The bargain whose share you've yet
To fulfill, your side of
Side of...
I have taught you
How to excel in the music biz
The moment has come you now belong to me, this is the moment
Surrender your heart to me
Come Vicky be with me
No second takes
It's decided
Decided...
Sealed the deal of no return
A binding contract
The ink is dry, so you and I are one!
Past the time of "perks" and "praise"
No more rehearsing
Your love is mine for the rest of our days!
From her seat Wanda stared nervously at her star-tipped wand. An image of the Yugopotamian mother ship drawing near to the small town stared back at her.
What spaceship fire will soon begin?
Timmy glanced nervously at the disguised alien waiting impatiently in the wings for his cue.
Hope Mark remembers I'm his friend.
Cosmo glanced from Wanda to Timmy in confusion.
Are we directors or the chorus?
Chip's melodious voice once again reigned supreme. According to the script he and his redheaded captive had nearly entered the stronghold of his domain.
Sealed the deal of no return
The final scene's here
What strange and wondrous feelings
In you burn
That sealed the deal of no return?
Mark fidgeted about just offstage. His tracker was set to vibrate and nearly rattled him through the floor. "Oh man," he muttered nervously, "they're close! Like REALLY close!"
Onstage Vicky sang out happy that the stupid play was almost over.
So you've caught me
Squelching on the deal we both made
Seems there's no use in running away
Won't deny it
Deny it.
I have thrived here,
Known all along the reason why
Now the time has come, time to own up
We two had a bargain
I was outta my head,
I've sworn my heart to you
No backing out
It's decided
Decided...
Bri studied Mark suspiciously. He sure is awful edgy. And I don't think it's a sudden case of stage fright.
As the spaceship drew near Vicky sang on.
Sealed the deal of no return
I'm in your debt now
It's time our fated romance was begun.
Sealed by my own greedy words
Bound to stay with you
Why must my career end now while I'm young?
Onboard the alien spaceship a 'special' passenger was eagerly awaiting their landing. And for some inexplicable reason she too was singing her lines...
On my way to lay Mark to waste
That quaking coward of a groom
Grr...I'm gonna rearrange his face!
Back inside the theater Chip and Vicky's voices combined as one.
Sealed the deal of no return
The final scene's here
Mark pulled out his tracking device and stole a quick look that nearly caused him a heart attack.
Aah! Mandie's here
She's sure to make me burn
Chip and Vicky...
We've sealed the deal of no return!
The music softened signaling the start of Chip's big solo. Mark balled his shaking fists in anticipation of the upcoming fight scene. Then he would show Vicky the true might of a Yugopotamian warrior prince and she would eagerly join him and leave the wimpy Earth punk behind!
Say you'll sing with me
Same song, same screen time
Join me, as I make my big comeback.
The girls in the audience (along with Timmy's dad) swooned at the first sound of his dreamy, adoring tone.
His words were not lost on his previously irritated co-star. Her pink eyes stared up at him in an obvious daze as she found herself lost in his song. It was like the first time she'd ever heard his melodious voice flowing through the airwaves and out of her stereo's speakers. That voice, that beautiful, pure, and utterly amazing voice. It was enough to melt her icky heart and unleash massive swarms of butterflies in her belly.
Say you want me
Singing there
Beside you
Anywhere you go
Let me go too
Vicky, that's all I ask of-
Snapping out of her stupor she remembered her next action. Quickly--before the final word of the love song could be sung--she reached up and yanked the mask away from Chip's face.
The audience gasped, cameras zoomed in, and Mr. Turner let out a squeal of delight.
"CHIP SKYLARK!" he exclaimed, "I knew you were the only one with a voice that hot!"
Chip and Vicky looked down in the front row with uneasy expressions.
"Um..." the leading female tried to remain in character, "...Chip Skylark? I can't believe it's really you!"
"Yes Vicky, it is I!" Chip shouted dramatically, "The famous, pretty, and popular-"
"Don't forget delicious!" Mr. Turner called out.
Chip shivered involuntarily, "Right...anyway, I am Chip Skylark! The teen singing sensation who mysteriously vanished one year ago today!"
Vicky feigned puzzlement, "But I don't get it. Why did you become the Phantom of the Music Biz when you were already a big hit? What, were you horribly mangled in a freak tour bus accident or something?"
Frowning Chip replied, "Worse, on my way back from a guest appearance at the opening of a new luxury resort in Hawaii my plane crashed and my face...my face..."
"Spit it out," Vicky grumbled.
"Just look!" he yelled shamefully pointing to the half of his face that Vicky had revealed to the crowd.
Leaning closer Vicky squinted, they were now in the dimly lit lair, yet even if there had been a thousand spotlights all pointed directly to the newly exposed half of his face she would've had a heck of a time seeing the tiny scratch that ran diagonally from the corner of his eye across the cheekbone (nobody panic, it's just make-up).
"You mean that tiny little scratch under your eye?" she questioned.
"Yes!" Chip spun around and hid his face in shame, "I thought my career was over so I hid myself here below the recording studio and became the Phantom of the Music Biz!"
"Unbelievable!" Vicky's response was one of annoyance rather than pity. "You celebrities are so shallow and self-absorbed! Who cares about a stupid little scratch!"
"Well..." Chip smiled sheepishly turning back around to face her, "there's that and I just got so tired of being hounded by reporters, talk show hosts, and fan girls everywhere I went. So the whole Phantom persona was a way of concealing my identity and gaining a little 'me time'."
"For an entire year?" Vicky inquired skeptically raising an eyebrow.
Shrugging Chip grinned, "Heh, I kinda of got into the role."
Vicky looked ready to smack him upside the head for being such a big dork but she never got the chance.
"VICKY!" Mark shouted bounding onstage, he was a bit off-cue but he'd become desperate now that the mother ship had landed and his parents (and psycho fiancée) were right outside.
"Chevy?" Vicky questioned, truly surprised seeing as how he was early.
"Release her puny human!" Mark brandished a laser sword at Chip.
"A laser sword?" Mr. Bickles gasped from his seat beside Brad Cuspidor, "There aren't any laser swords in my musical!"
"Word!" Brad was amazed, "These unscripted stunts are da bomb!"
Laughing nervously Mr. Bickles shrank down in his seat.
Chip's prop sword was quickly cut down by Mark's superior weapon. It looked like curtains for the phantom...
"Finally," Timmy muttered, "I didn't think this dumb play was ever gonna end!"
"B-but Timmy," Cosmo stuttered, "Mark's gonna win, and then he'll kidnap Vicky and take her away to Yugopotamia and she'll be gone forever!"
"And as good as that sounds," Wanda added, "poor Chip will be devastated!"
A few rows back Norm placed his hands behind his head and reclined in his seat wearing a smug grin, "Well, I may not have been able to land Turner in hot water—this time—but it looks like your shrew of a sister won't be the future Mrs. Skylark after all."
Tootie nervously chewed her nails. Oh no! Gotta think...
WHAM!
Everyone jumped at the sound of the double doors in the back being kicked open. The audience turned and all eyes fell on the unexpected arrival.
"MARK CHANG!" an angry female voice screeched.
The disguised alien on stage gulped, "Like gasp! It is my totally vengeful ex-fiancée Princess Mandie!"
Mrs. Turner regarded the lavender haired woman brandishing the flaming sword with a puzzled expression. "I don't remember this being part of the story?" she whispered.
"Ooo!" Mr. Turner ogled the newcomer, "I think I'm starting to like opera!"
Sneering his wife took out a pen and scribbled something on the back of her program before handing it to her husband and commanding in a threatening voice, "Read it."
Trembling he did so, "I mean, oh dear, what a hideously underdressed actress. I am sure glad that I married my gorgeous appropriately dressed wife instead of her."
"How dare you run off to this planet and chase after that other girl!" Mandie pointed a finger at Vicky, her arm shaking with rage. "In case you've forgotten--fiancé--YOU'RE MINE!"
"Uh...uh...wait, Princess Mandie! You do not understand-" Mark stammered.
"Dude," Chip glared at his rival, "you already had a fiancée and still flirted with my girl?"
"Cretin," Vicky murmured.
The alien prince decided to make one last desperate plea to his love (before his crazy fiancée totally killed him) in a vain attempt to get her to choose him over the harmonious Earth punk. "Vicky my love, come with me back to my planet so that we may flee from this horrid singer of flawless tone and live out the rest of our lives in pure tuneless bliss! 'kay?"
"Ugh, forget it dweb," Vicky scoffed, "I've had enough of yutzes in costumes."
"Yes!" Tootie bounded up and down happily in her seat before turning towards the genie beside her, "Take THAT Norm!"
"Oh yeah, I'm crushed." Norm yawned lazily then smirked, "And by the way, an eighteen-year-old critic hopping around in their seat is a definite attention grabber."
Blushing Tootie sat back down and waved shyly at the people who were staring.
Up in front Brad was stunned, "Whoa! You mean in this version the Phantom actually WINS?"
"Um...hehe..." Mr. Bickles tugged at his red bandana nervously, "...yes? It's um...a new spin on a bittersweet ending?"
Brad stared at him blankly for a moment before throwing his hands in the air and exclaiming excitedly, "Yo dude! I LOVE IT!"
"Y-you do?" Well now that's a pleasant surprise.
"Of course man!" the teen host beamed, "Chip Skylark fans are gonna dig this!"
"But...but babe I-" Mark tried to protest but was snatched in a choking hold by his enraged fiancée.
"We are going back to Yugopotamia." she hissed yanking him face-to-face, "And we'll have plenty of time on the way to talk--VIOLENTLY!"
"AAAAHHHH!"
People turned around in their seats to watch as the strange woman stormed back through the middle aisle dragging the terrified 'Chevy' behind her.
SLAM!
"Ouch!" Norm winced as the doors slammed shut, "When they say 'love hurts' they're not kidding."
Grinning for a moment Chip scooped Vicky up into his arms and sang out triumphantly...
It's over now
The Phantom's won the fight!
Offstage Bri quickly signaled for Troy and Reggie to drop the curtain as Chip and Vicky shared a passionate kiss.
Afterwards...the was silence.
Complete...
Utter...
Dead...
Silence.
From up in the front row the green haired director's assistant glanced around curiously. A light bulb suddenly (and literally) went off over his head.
"Oh yeah!" he exclaimed before clapping enthusiastically, "YAY!"
Instantly the rest of the audience joined in and soon the whole theater was filled with the sound of the thunderous applause as people stood to give the cast and 'inspired' director a standing ovation.
Backstage the cast was both amazed and excited by the unexpected reaction.
"They...liked it?" Troy was baffled.
"Yo man," Reggie cheered, "we rock!"
Bri rushed up to her redheaded pal and gave her an elated high five, "Do you hear that girl? They like us! They really like us!"
"Places people!" Mr. Bickles called as he entered through the curtain, "Time to take our final bow!"
While the cameras (and audience) were focused on the row of actors and actresses onstage a certain agent of love was happily preparing to report in to her boss. Sneaking outside with Norm trudging behind she unfastened her communicator and leaned against the railing along the steps that led up to the theater's main entrance.
"Cupid's gonna love this," Tootie smiled, "A happy ending all the way around!"
"Yeah yeah so it's back to the drawing board." the genie didn't seem at all deterred, "Turner's luck will run out someday and when it does-"
"I'll be there to protect him!" Tootie vowed.
"Oh please," Norm rolled his eyes then remembered his other objective, "oh by the way, there is still the little unresolved matter of your third wish."
"What about it?" Tootie frowned.
"C'mon kid, let's face it, ya can't keep putting it off forever." Norm was starting to get cocky again, "Sooner or later you're gonna slip up so there's really no point in stalling is there?"
Tootie's hands balled into fists. Like it or not that the smart-aleck mystical being was right. No matter what she'd eventually be tricked into making the third wish leaving Norm to either find a way out of going back into the lamp, or become someone else's genie and wreak havoc on them...or worse...Canada!
"Grr...you're so selfish!" she shouted, "And deceitful!"
"Oh ow kid," he laughed mockingly, "that really hurts. You know, here I thought we were making real progress too. That maybe we could even be pals."
His sarcasm gave Tootie an idea.
"Hn, why don't you use that third wish of yours to change your name huh?" he snickered, "Something that doesn't scream 'laugh at me I'm a total geek'!"
Narrowing her eyes (wearing a smirk of her own) Tootie decided to go ahead and make her final wish. "Norm, for my third wish..."
Twisting his arms he prepared to dazzle her with a completely chaotic version of whatever she dared to wish for.
Pointing a finger at the floating prankster she exclaimed, "I wish you were my lifelong genie godfather!"
Norm's violet eyes widened, "What!"
"You heard me", she smirked, "I wish you were my lifelong genie godfather. Now you have to grant it!"
"B-b-but..." Norm stuttered nervously, "...that means I'd be stuck as your genie godfather for-"
"The rest of my life," Tootie finished smugly. Timmy's not the only one who can out-jerk a genie!
"NOO!" Norm shouted dropping down to the ground, "The whole fairy godfather gig is SO last century! No respectable genie would be caught dead in that pansy occupation! I'll be a laughing stock! A joke! I won't do it! You can't make me!"
"Norm, Norm, Norm," Tootie tsked, "haven't you forgotten one tiny little detail?"
Norm looked over at her with a skeptical yet shaky gaze.
"Like what?" he asked cockily despite his frayed nerves.
With a menacing smile she stated triumphantly, "MY wish is YOUR command!"
Swirling magical mists surrounded the out-jerked genie changing his golden hair clasp into a tiny crown, on his wrist cuffs twinkling star emblems (like those atop fairy godparents' wands) appeared.
"NOOOOOO...AWWW!" Norm screamed looking himself over with embarrassed unpleasantness. "I hate this new look," he grumbled, "I feel like a complete sissy."
Chuckling to herself Tootie whipped out the rose and changed back to her twelve-year-old self just as the doors opened and people came filing out. "But you look adorable, haha!"
In a flash he was back in his disguise muttering grouchily under his breath. "That's two brats on my list. THEN Canada!"
As the departing crowd thinned out a bit Tootie spotted a certain bucktoothed, pink-hatted dreamboat heading down the steps with his two pals who had the oddly colored hair.
"Bye Timmy!" she chirped nearly causing the boy to stumble the whole way down, "Don't forget you promised to come over and play with me later!"
Timmy raced down the steps to his fairy godparents who were laughing at the bottom.
"Oh great," he cringed, "she remembered."
"Well of course she did Timmy," Cosmo chuckled, "everyone knows an orangutan never forgets! ...or was it waffles?"
Wanda sighed, "Sweetie the only kind of play you're good for is playing on my last nerve."
Grinning Cosmo obliviously took a bow, "Good night everybody!"
Shaking his head dejectedly Norm groaned, "I hate my life."
Amanda/Artiste: One more chapter (epilogue) to go! Whoot! Just a little peek into how things are going with Mark, Vicky, Chip, Tootie, and her new genie godfather--NORM! Mwuhahaha! Ahem...plus I may disclose some info about the sequel where Des and Crocker actually come in. So review and--um--don't flame me!
