Disclaimer: I own Nada. Except what I make up.
Thanks for the reviews guys. It helps to know people appreciate me. Keep on Reviewing. And just to answer some questions. Yes, I have started a Story called "Her Wishes" Some people are angry, because I am involving recent events, but that is the purpose of being "based on a true story." I will continue to write, even with the objections, because that is a subject which I believe strongly on. Also, it would be a continuation from this story, pretending, Ryan finds Marissa, and everything is fine. So check it out, and if you have a problem with it, you can let me know, but I will not stop writing it.
WHAT COULD HAVE BEEN
Treatment
What Was he proud of. Why else wasn't Sandy proud. He didn't get anything out of Sandy, because only Marissa knew the truth. Something happened after she went to the treatment center, but he didn't know what. He wasn't exactly sure Sandy knew either, and that really surprised him, because he thought they talked to each other about everything. But apparently, that was not true at all.
MARISSA"S STORY (Nobody knows about this portion besides her.)
Marissa arrived at the Clinic, and said goodbye to Sandy. She would be there for the next twenty eight days. Twenty eight long days. But even though she was at her rock bottom, even though she weighed under 100 pounds. Even though she looked terrible, and had little self-esteem, she felt great. She was feeling the best she had felt in a long time. She had some control over her life, enough to admit she had a problem, and that she needed help. That was why she was here, today in a recovery center. She was here to overcome her problem, and make the madness stop.
Marissa was led into the room where she was to stay for the next month. It was nice and quaint room. It was much smaller than the one she had at home, but she could deal with it. It had a bed on one side, and a dresser and closet on the other. It actually reminded her of a single dorm room in a college, except a little bit bigger, but not much. There were some pictures of various things on the wall, but mostly pictures of what drugs will do to you. She understood what they meant when they said twenty-four hour teaching.
As soon as Marissa set her bags down, and fell down onto the bed to test how comfortable it is, a woman in her mid twenties walked in and stood just inside the doorway.
"Hi. Who are you?" Marissa asked the woman.
She approached Marissa, smiled, and reached out her hand to be shaken.
"Hi, I am going to be your drug counselor here. My name is Jan Reynolds, but you can just call me Jay, that is what everybody calls me, and I don't really know or care why."
"Marissa Cooper." Marissa answered, shaking the other's hand.
"Well are you ready for the grand tour of this wonderful facility?"
"Sure."
Jan took Marissa around, and showed her the ropes of the place. It was definitely one of the nicer facilities, or she could imagine. After all, she never really went to an institution like this before, or any one before, so this was all a little new to Marissa.
"This here is our rec room." Announced Jan. The room was actually very nice. Since the people their were in high school and college, the room had things that would fit that type of scene. There was a ping pong, and pool table in the corner, and a television in the other corner, and the entire place was carpeted, and surrounded with random chairs and couches to fill up the space.
The next room she took her to was the meeting room. It was the place where they would have group discussions. Marissa remembered hearing about the schedule, and that she would have to have one group meeting everyday, and then the next place she would go was to a personal meeting. She would have that in the Psychological office, with Jan.
"Well that is the grand tour! Everyday you will go to the main classroom, where you will go learn your courses with our special Harbor professor. Than you will complete the rest of the routine that we went over each and everyday until your stay ends. Understand?"
Marissa nodded her head.
Jan walked away and left Marissa on her own.
It was now twenty eight seven days later. Marissa was getting out tomorrow. She was about to have her last meeting with Jan to discuss what she should try to do when she gets out. Marissa stepped into Jan's office, and sat down, or actually lay down on the sofa that she laid on for much of the times she came here. She remembered specifically her first time, when she revealed why she had started with her eating disorder in the first place……
FLASH BACK
Marissa had walked in for the first time to Jan's office for her very first Psychological meeting. When she entered the room, she stood around uncomfortably as Jan was nowhere to be scene. Marissa looked over at the plaques on the wall. She was astounded by the different array of awards she had won, mostly coming from Stanford University. That was some school. The oddness of Marissa's situation was broken when Jan walked into the room.
"Marissa! How are you, and how is your second day?" She asked, giddy as she always is.
"Not bad."
"Well let us get right to it. So, How did your bulimia start?"
"Well, I guess you could say that in ninth grade I suffered from Anorexia, mostly because of my mother. She tried to pressure me, saying that I should be a size zero instead on a one, and I guess I felt that I needed to lose weight. But I quickly got over that when my best friend Summer told me that I was looking on the skinny side. Then, I guess you could say my life completely changed when this guy, Ryan Atwood moved to Newport. I fell in love with him, and when we broke up, he ended up having sex with somebody else. We got back together, but his ex came back, telling him she was pregnant. He was ripped from my life, and I never recovered."
"Go on Marissa, go on."
"Well, I was in a dark state all summer long. I drank a lot, and I ended up fooling around with the yard guy, to take my mind off of Ryan. But then unexpectedly, Ryan came home. But after he thought we would get back together, he caught me kissing D.J, the yard guy at my house. He was devastated. He got in an accident that left him in a Coma, well and he is still in a coma. I wasn't the same after that. I looked at his accident at a way of him rejecting me. I guess I put a thought in my head that I didn't look good, and I was fat, and that is why he left me. So I started to become bulimic, because I could still have food. I was too blind to realize that I had a problem, until my friend Summer caught me with my finger down my throat trying to purge the food that I had just ate. So that is how I got here today. I decided that I needed help, and I want to get better. That is what Ryan would want…..
END OF FLASH BACK
She remembered that day like it was yesterday. That was one of the very first days that she had ever opened up to a person that she barely knew. It felt good, and now it was almost over. Marissa could honestly say that she had not had any thoughts relating to bulimia in over a week. This therapy had really helped, and she had nobody to thank besides herself, because she admitted to herself that she needed help.
"So Marissa, I want to discuss what I feel you should do when you get out, what you need to accomplish, and what needs to happen, in order for full recovery."
"Okay Jan."
"First, you need to admit to everybody in your life about Ryan catching you and DJ making out, and Ryan catching you. That seems to be where all the guilt is rooted. You feel as if you have this secret, that makes it all your fault, and to be relieved of this great stress, you need to tell everybody. You need to tell Summer, Seth, and especially Kirsten, that would mean a lot to her. Also tell your parents. I want you to think about the good times you and Ryan had whenever a bulimic thought comes through your head. I need you to stay strong for me Marissa, okay?"
"Okay."
Jan and Marissa stood up. Jan walked over to her, and embraced her in a hug.
"I never want to see you here again, okay?"
"Sure." Marissa smiled and she went back to her room.
"Oh and Marissa?"
"Yea." She answered, turning around
"Pray for him. I will everyday."
"Thanks."
Marissa packed up all her stuff, and got ready for Sandy to pick her up so she could leave again. The first place they agreed to go was to see Ryan. Marissa hadn't been in over a month, after going everyday. It would be a return to form for her, and would be very comforting.
Sandy parked his car, and greeted Marissa at the doors.
"You ready to come home kiddo?"
"Let's go home."
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