"Kill Me Again"

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the characters from Cruel Intentions, if I did, Sebastian and Kathryn would be together and Annette would have been killed instead.

Summery: One shot. Sebastian / Kathryn. Sebastian POV

A/N: Song is Oomph! Kill Me Again. This is COMPLETE!

XXX

You set my world on fire.
You're such an awesome liar
You set my soul on ice
I'm gonna pay the price.


So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is dead.


Thinking back on my life as I lay there dying I couldn't pretend to be surprised when nearly every happy memory my treacherous mind conjured contained Kathryn. All of our games and my conquests, her smiles and laughs swam through my brain. Touching her, watching her touch me… my jealousy when she touched other men and women flooded my head. Her pain when I told her about Annette, when I left her for Annette, the same girl I was dying for and to save, causing me agony of my own. In all honesty I did love her… once!

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

The first time I met her she was absolutely stunning, a little over fourteen years old but so matured and developed you could say. Full breasts an angelic face with long dark brown hair that waved around it. Stunning hazel eyes you could drown in and her mother was fucking my father, behind her own father's back. Until we walked in on them, then she changed when it came to me. She'd always been a bitch, she was a Mertuil what could I expect, but she was never a bitch to me. When we saw our parents (well her mom, my dad) fucking she just snapped I guess. I was blamed of course after all it was my 'scum bag' father breaking up her parent's marriage. Victor and Tiffany divorced and Kathryn got stuck with her mother, much to her displeasure.

I saw her once or twice after that but she didn't really forgive me. I almost got her into bed one of those times, almost! We talked, we drank, and we fought, the usual. And then we kissed. I can still remember every detail about it. About her, the way she had her hair curled that night, light brown streaks through it so it matched her cream and brown Versace dress. Her stiletto heels making her inches taller than she was, even in the awkwardly high heels she still walked proud and confident, especially for a fifteen year old. Then again this was Kathryn, what else was to be expected?

I really don't know why
You make me wanna die
I see it in your eyes
You're full of brilliant lies.

So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is what you get.
So want you see is dead.

I got talking to her and when we were finally alone I apologised, even though it wasn't my fault but my dads, then she did the unexpected and apologized to me. I was so stunned I didn't react when she pressed her lips to mine. At first, then of course I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close, not foolish enough to throw away this opportunity. Yeah, yeah, she did act the goody goody, and I was pulled in by it but when she framed me for fucking the maid at just thirteen because I wouldn't let her watch the TV tone night, I began to understand what she was capable of.

And for a while I was glad I was the only one, I had her pegged as a second me, but I realise now she was way better than I could ever hope to be. She was going to get away with everything yet again, but I guess I'm changing the subject now aren't I? Anyway, I had her pressed into the mattress soon enough, my hand up under her dress gob smacked by her lack of underwear.

"Didn't want panty lines" She'd told me when I asked. Her hand moving to the front of my crotch to stroke my bulge hidden by my dress pants, she whispered in my ear, things I would have died before I believed she would say. I was right; she really was not the goody goody she made herself out to be. Of course I didn't dwell on it and ruin a perfectly good lay opportunity, until her mother walked in.

I was finger fucking her as lay beneath me crying my name out in ecstasy, her lithe form wiggling and arching as I pumped my digits in and out of her tight cunt. She came screaming my name as I pulled my self out of the confines of my pants, I was so close and then there was Tiffany screaming bloody murder from the doorway as I hovered over her underage daughter almost unconscious from her orgasm. No I'm not flattering myself, she'd never admit it but she remembers.

Of course she does, it was the night her mother took her away from me again. Edward, my father, turned up, took one look and had me 'escorted' to my room. Kathryn's things were packed and they left England and this time not one invitation could tempt them back. I missed her so much those days, months, or years she was gone. Well it was actually only a little over one year before I saw her again.

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

I saw her two years ago, my father and I turned up on a doorstep to meet his new fiancé, and who answered the door but Kathryn. I couldn't believe it, I shouted at the top of my lung "you're my father's fiancé?" he looked at me with a sick expression on his face and told me she was only a child. Kathryn had hated him from that moment on; she told her mother her 'special friend' was there so she should change into something sluttier if she expected to keep him. She threw me a cold look and stormed off to what I assume to be her room.

I found her, snorting coke, I freaked and grabbed it off of her and flushed the lot. She screamed at me about how much it cost and I promised to pay her back, I never did come to think of it. We talked and she said I had meant something to her, I wasn't just some quick trick like all her other guys, but when I could feel this enormous amount of hope swell inside me she crushed it all with her next words. "you're going to be my brother" she'd whispered it, like she hated hearing it, she probably does, when ever I call her 'sister' she always adds 'step'. It's plain as day now, she was convincing herself not me.

But we fell into an uneasy relationship at first. Always at each other's throats or trying to seduce the other, except when it was my turn to seduce she was always the first to pull away. Around her I had no control, I was a teenage virgin again desperate to get my first lay no matter how awkward it was or how soon it was over. Around her I was helpless!

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again


If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

If you don't think you can save me
Kill me - kill me again

This all lead up to now. Our parents were married for two years before we made that bet. Ridiculous at the time but I wanted her so bad, our almost first time had me craving more, desperate for more, even a crumb of her attention, affection… love? …had me crawling on my knees for her. If a bet meant I could sleep with her, I couldn't wait to win. I never expected to fall in live with Annette, neither did Kathryn. I understand why she tried to break us up, now that it's too late to tell her, or to convince Annette to forgive her, I understand she was scared. Of losing me to someone 'nice', someone I could truly care for. She was wrong! I cared for her, for Kathryn Mertuil and no one else were going to take those feelings from me.

But she went overboard. I tried to call it off… I tried not to win… I tried everything but telling Kathryn the truth, maybe if I had I'd be lying in bed with her right now rather than on the middle of the road in agony. And while dying I try to hate her… I try to think of all the bad things between us but my mind comes up blank. I can remember something bad happening with every girl, including Annette, but with Kathryn, and I knew no matter how much I claimed not to believe in it I had found my soul mate, my one true love and she was the girl leaning over me in hysterics. She was a beautiful, seductive, dangerous brunette that he would never get the change to make love to. Yeah that was right… Sebastian Valmont had fallen in love but this time with…


Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

Your love has made me feel like I'm dead

… Kathryn Mertuil

The End

I may do a sequel from Kathryn's POV maybe, if people want it... please read and review! I know it's a bit short but still… :D