Chapter 5 – the sweet kiss of alcohol
"Please Haley, come on, mot even for your best friend Brooke?" I looked at her, she is sticking out her bottom lip to try and look sad, and it is actually really funny.
So things have been good between the two of us lately. She keeps saying how great it is that we are back to "normal", I guess our friendship is but I still haven't faced Nathan yet, I just can't. Brooke and I ditched cheerleading today; she said that we had a personal emergency. That was fine with me, even though I usually hate liars, because the less time spent with Nathan the better, and that was one less awkward situation that I could avoid. I don't like avoiding him though, its actually turning out to be really hard, and I wasn't to tell Brooke, but I just cant bring myself to share that deep dark secret with her, not yet anyway. That makes it hard to explain to her why I can't go to this party tonight, but she just keeps begging me too.
"Brooke, don't you think that we would have more fun just he two of us?" I wish that I could tell her, I want to say that I can't see Nathan, not yet, but that would require an explanation, which is something that I'm just not ready to give.
"Haley, how about if we go and if its as horrible as you think that it will be, then we will leave."
"Promise?"
"I Promise!" I guess it wont be that bad, even though it is at Nathan's house. I could just avoid him all night, not a problem, besides I love it when Brooke gets so happy.
"Alright Tigger, you've convinced me to go to the party." As I'm saying this I get a feeling in the pit of my stomach, a feeling that I'm making the wrong choice and that something is bound to go wrong. I hope though, I truly, hope that it turns out alright, because with one little slip, I'll fall to the ground and shatter, and once I'm completely broken, I wont be able to go back together.
God, I can smell the alcohol already, what did I get myself into; I've already spotted Nathan. He's talking to some whore who isn't even worth his time, not hat I'm jealous of her or anything. Ugh, I was hoping got forget him, at least for a while, but I've already started to get jealous of some skank. It's really hot in here, I wish that I could have worn a short-sleeved shirt or a tank top, but I had to keep my arms covered.
"Hales, wanna go an get a drink with me, babe?" That's just like Brooke, looking to get wasted as soon as she steps in the door. Now usually, I would try to talk her out of it, but tonight, getting plastered and losing all feeling sounds like a brilliant idea.
"Lead the way to the keg Tigger, I'm all for it!"
"Wow, tutor-girls going wild, I like it!" Tutor-girl, that's Brooke's name for me. Ever since we were little because I used to tell her that I wanted to be a tutor when I grew up. My older sister Tina was a tutor then, before she became a cheerleader. I always wanted to be just like her, I still wish that I were sometime. She is so happy and has a great life. She isn't stuck in an empty shell of who she used to be the way that I am. She has the perfect life.
Brooke snaps me back to attention when she hands me the big red cup, practically overflowing, it's gone within seconds. The alcohol burns on the way down, but it feels good, I need this tonight, time for seconds.
"Haley, I'm going to go find Peyton, okay? Do you want to come with me?" Peyton is our other close friend, also a cheerleader, but she would rather be making art than anything else. She just went through a horrible breakup with her now ex-boyfriend Jake, and I don't really fell like sitting there trying to make her feel better.
"That's okay, um, Ill just hang out here, but you can go ahead." Brooke already has too much of a buzz to find it weird that I want to stay behind by myself, because usually, I would never ever be left alone at a party, I just hated being in a room full of people that I didn't know or like without anyone that I did know and like with me. But tonight I just wanted to be alone with the keg.
After my 5th, no 6th, wait actually, well… I'm not sure, but after a few too many beers I'm not exactly thinking clearly. That's why I know that I need to talk to Nathan. I should tell him that I wished that I hadn't run away from him. Ooh, there he is.
"Nathan." Okay, if he would stop spinning, I could talk to him, wow, he looks hott, I guess that it makes the most sense to just kiss him, ya that sounds good. Whoops, bad idea, he pulled away, damn.
"Hales, you're drunk, we should do this later, we need to talk, but not now." The rejections almost enough to kill my buzz, almost. Well if he doesn't want me Il l find somebody who does. Perfect, a guy from the team, Matt, I think, is checking me out, I'm sure he wouldn't mind getting to spend a little time with me tonight
