Author's Notes: I wanted to apologize for how long it took me to pump out this chapter. It's not as long as I would have liked, but with less than a month of school left, I've been a little pressed for time to myself. Thank you so much for your patience and I hope you enjoy this update! Also: I know Peyton is going to seem a little out of character in this chapter, but I hope you give it a chance! Enjoy! •0621

I wanted to apologize for how long it took me to pump out this chapter. It's not as long as I would have liked, but with less than a month of school left, I've been a little pressed for time to myself. Thank you so much for your patience and I hope you enjoy this update! I know Peyton is going to seem a little out of character in this chapter, but I hope you give it a chance! Enjoy!

A big thank you goes out to my beta, Kat! You're awesome, Kat!

R e v i s i t e d

A One Tree Hill fanfic by 0621

Chapter Four: Because All the World's a Stage

At the time, he'd been certain that parenting would be his downfall, and in so many ways it was. Being a father was something Jake Jagielski hadn't planned on, or to be perfectly honest even looked forward to. But that was before Nikki, before Jenny. Now he couldn't imagine a more fulfilling, rewarding career than being a dad to his beautiful baby girl. On the other hand, he often found himself feeling inadequate and not up to the task of being a good dad. There was many a night he lied awake wondering if he would ever be able to give Jenny everything she needed, let alone everything she deserved. And so much of his own life was still an uncertainty. Like Peyton, for instance.

He was ready for commitment. Being a father had taught him a few things about living his life for other people. But what Jake didn't know was if Peyton was ready for a long-term relationship. After all, being with him meant she had to deal with a lot of things she wouldn't normally have to deal with in a relationship with a normal guy in high school. She'd already helped him so much with caring for Jenny, he wasn't sure if it was fair to ask her for more.

For a long moment, he sat in silence, rocking his baby girl back and forth in his arms, glad for the shade of the tree in Peyton's front lawn. It was the type of long, lazy summer afternoon that made him wish he could sit on the grass forever and gaze at the sky, safe with his daughter at last. But summer afternoons gave way to summer nights, and with Peyton around those weren't so bad, either. Not that he ever let things go overboard--Jake had learned the hard way that self-control was a virtue.

He stretched out under the tree, carefully placing Jenny on his stomach as he contemplated the sky. The day rolled past him lazily, allowing him to temporarily push Nikki to the back of his mind. He watched a cloud float by and smiled, thinking it looked like an elephant with lopsided ears. He closed his eyes and felt Jenny's fingers curl into his shirt in that iron grip only babies can manage.

"You're looking pretty relaxed there, Jagielski." A shadow fell over his closed eyelids. "Something happen I should know about?"

He peeked up at Peyton and then grinned at her, his smile lopsided but adorable. She stood above him for a moment more, drinking him in, before dropping her borrowed purse onto the grass and settling gracefully down with her legs crossed. Her fingers idly plucked at nearby blades of grass, and her hair glowed under the sunshine like a halo.

"Nothing," he replied, "except that Jenny's finally fallen asleep, giving her father a much needed half hour of rest and relaxation." His arm reached for her, and he laughed when she wrinkled her nose.

"It's itchy," she protested, even as she was stretching out to lie beside him.

"You sound like Brooke." He tweaked her nose and she laughed.

"She's rubbed off on me." Her smile was blinding as she peeked up at him. "It kind of happens when you've been friends as long as we've been."

They fell silent then, allowing themselves to nearly drift to sleep. But though she appeared peaceful, Petyon's mind was working in a slightly panicked flurry. Beneath her hand, she could feel Jake's breathing slow as he approached unconsciousness, joining his daughter in dream land.

Could she do this? Could she honestly be considering this? It was beyond out of character for her. Not only that, but it was almost guaranteed to be doomed to fail. It would be a highly hypocritical move on her part, considering what a cynic she'd been almost all of her young adult life. But this was for Jenny. And maybe—just in part—maybe for herself a little, too.

"Jake."

He shifted a little, her voice pulling him back from the brink of dreams. "Hmm?" It was more a inquisitive sound than an actual response.

"I need to ask you something important."

Slowly, one of his eyes opened. Then he shut it again, shook his head slightly to clear it, and lifted himself up on his elbows. He moved gently to keep from waking Jenny, who had her thumb in her mouth and her free hand tightly knotted into his shirt.

"What's up?" His brow was wrinkled in concern, and Peyton lifted her fingers to his face to ease the worry in his expression.

"Custody goes to whoever can provide a stable home to a child, right?"

"I…put simply, yes," he agreed, wondering where she was going with this line of conversation.

"And a stable home is usually one with two caregivers."

Jake tilted his head and his brow wrinkled further. He knew that she'd spent most of her formative years alone, since her mother had passed away and her father's job dragged him from home for long months out of the year. Was she saying that Jenny would be better off with her mother? That a little girl needed her mommy most of all? Though Peyton obviously felt no lost love for Nikki, perhaps she did feel that Jenny would be better of with a mother than with a father.

"Peyt—" he started, his heart wrenching nearly out of his chest in both pain and panic, but she shushed him, her eyes wild and scared and excited all at once. He could see her pulse pounding in her throat and felt her grip his arm as her breath shortened.

"Jake, will you marry me?"

•••

Brooke stared at Felix and willed herself to feel something for him.

Well, perhaps that was a bad way to think of it. She stared at him and tried to make herself feel the butterflies she'd felt the night before. She stared at him and tried to make himself feel excited by his presence. She stared at him and tried to make herself feel anything but hollow and cold. And it wasn't working.

If Peyton could see you now. Hypocrite.

She had become the thing she most hated: the cheater, the backstabber, the hussy. She'd done some pretty dishonorable things in her day, but this had to be the worst. She'd vowed to herself never to be that girl. She would never cheat on someone—that was a golden rule, one of the few standards she'd held herself to during her entire—and entirely wild—dating career.

She dragged her gaze away from Felix's face and tried to erase the image of Lucas'. Why did she let him do this to her? He'd made it clear, again, that she meant nothing to him. She didn't want to be in this position anymore. Why had he even kissed her in the first place?

Because he's just like every other guy, she snapped viciously to herself. Because all he cares about his getting a shot at some ass. Because people like me will never mean anything to him.

But there was a cooler, more logical voice in her brain as well, one that she preferred to ignore during fits of anger, though it was becoming increasingly impossible to disregard it today.

You know that's not true, it whispered, teasing her from the corners of her mind. Lucas isn't like that. He's not like every other guy. He does care about you and your feelings—and he'd be the first to be there if you were in trouble.

She sighed and shook her head, wondering why she bothered to defend him in her thoughts. She reached out and touched Felix's hand as if to reassure herself that he was still there. She'd pushed him out of her mind last night far too easily. Not that he was a forgettable person…but with Lucas, everything else seemed to fade to the fringes of existence. Her fingers curled around her boyfriend's and she clung to him tightly.

"What's wrong?" he asked, his attention coming to her. He'd been looking over a menu, though she'd dragged him to Karen's Café several times before and he always ordered the same thing.

I'm afraid that if I let go, you'll disappear and Lucas will be able to hurt me again. "Nothing." She smiled at him brightly. "So, boyfriend, think you might try something different this time?"

He rolled his eyes at her even though he was smiling. "Why should I? I know what I like." He squeezed her hand and she lifted her eyebrows suggestively, mischief in her gaze.

"Oh really?"

He laughed, and it struck Brooke then that he looked like a model. Everything about him was in line and stylish, down to the bright white of his perfect teeth. She couldn't help but compare this to Lucas' casual, comfortable style. He always looked so huggable, while Felix's clean-cut fashion made him that much more untouchable.

Stop thinking about Lucas.

"Really," Felix confirmed, breaking into her thoughts. He unlaced their entwined hands to trace a finger up her arm and over her shoulder. He tapped her nose, then pulled his hand back and flicked his menu into the center of the table. "Chili."

"You know," she mused, shaking her head and trying to sound disappointed, "you just don't strike me as the chili-eating sort of guy."

He shrugged. "I think every guy's a chili-eating kinda guy, when you get right down to it."

She laughed and flicked her hair back over her shoulder. "I think you might have a point."

There was a moment of silence then, as their eyes met. Her heart throbbed in her chest as she wondered just how much he could see of her through her gaze. She was glad that he wasn't holding onto her hand anymore because her palms had gone sweaty. She was sure she'd paled, and she was almost as certain that her face conveyed her shameful actions.

What if he guesses?

She let out a shaky breath.

What if I'll always want Lucas no matter who I'm with?

But Felix only smiled again and put in their order. She looked up, half expecting to see Jake there, but it was a girl from school whose name she couldn't quite recall. Ashley or something. Felix winked at the girl as she finished jotting down their request, then turned his gaze back toward the door, and Brooke watched his features contort as the little bell announced a new arrival. She stiffened automatically, recognizing the expression on her boyfriend's face. She didn't even have to turn to guess who was there, there was only one person it could be.

Lucas.

She could almost feel his gaze coming to rest on the back of her head, and a chill ran down her spine, sending a powerful shiver through her whole body. She kept her eyes locked on her boyfriend's face and tried to ignore her urge to turn and stare at her ex-love. Twisting her napkin, she sent up a prayer to whoever was listening that he would simply pass themleaving her in peace.

She was granted that boon at least. Lucas walked by, stiff-backed and stern at the sight of Felix. He shot Brooke one quick glance, and though he was trying to speak to her through his gaze, she turned her face away. She didn't want to hear more of his apologies. She'd had enough of those for a lifetime.

Felix watched him pass, his whole body primed for action. His mouth was in a firm, drawn line, and he had balled his fingers into a fist. Things between the two of them had never been easy, even without Brooke between them.

After a long moment of silence, Lucas disappeared into the back of the café and Felix relaxed. His fingers found hers again and he gave her hand another gentle squeeze, trying to catch her gaze.

"You okay?" he asked, noting her distress.

Brooke looked up at him and smiled a sweet, warm smile. "Fine," she replied. Just fucking fine.

•••

He was bleeding.

He'd tried to clean up the glass of the broken beer bottle with hands that were shaking like leaves, and now blood was dripping down his arm in little crimson rivers. Nathan watched it run down his arm in numb fascination. After all, it kept him from looking at Haley. It was like a dream come true in the midst of a nightmare, and he wasn't sure he trusted himself to speak. There was a precipice here, he could feel it between them, as real as if they were standing on either edge of the Grand Canyon.

She was touching him, trying to wipe the blood from his arm and staunch his bleeding, the same way his mother had when he was a rambunctious little boy. Her fingers were cool and her touch made him tingle with awareness. That hadn't changed between them. There was electricity whenever they touched. And there was a storm building between them.

He pulled his arm from her grasp and turned his gaze to hers, his body shaking in a sudden, inexplicable rage. He'd felt this way as soon as he'd realized she'd gone. But it was worse now, with her here, staring at him like she couldn't understand his reaction.

"Nathan—"

He shook his head and stood up, not really understanding himself. He'd thought that if she came back, everything would get better. His world would be right again, and they could work on their marriage and realize that yes, they were in fact made for each other. Even as he moved away from her, he could feel an overwhelming urge to run to her and hold on tight. But he also had an irrational urge to lash out at her, and he wasn't sure which he would act on first.

"Listen, I…I don't know what to say. I thought about it the whole way home, I had it all planned out, but I just can't think of how it went…" She clapped a hand to her forehead and studied the floor as if she'd never seen carpet before, her nervousness tangible in the air between them. "Nathan, I love you and I came home because I want to be with you. When I vowed to share my life with you, I meant it, and music is a part of that life. Being up there, singing…it's more than I dared imagine for myself. But it feels so fake when you're not with me."

Their gazes met, but Nathan was silent. His face was as unyielding as stone, and he could tell that he was frightening her.

Good, he thought viciously. Let her be frightened. Let her feel like I did when she disappeared.

"Please, Nathan…" Her eyes were pleading. "Say something."

He let out a low, bitter laugh, his dark eyes cold as a winter night. "And what would you like me to say, Haley? Welcome home? All is forgiven? Well, it's not that goddamn easy."

If he'd slapped her, she couldn't have been more shocked. For a long moment she stared at him in mute surprise, and then the tears started to well up in her arms. This was not the homecoming she'd naively prayed for. She ran her trembling, sweaty hands down her shirt and sucked in a shaky breath.

"Is this about Chris, because we've talked about this and?"

"It doesn't have a thing to do with Chris!" He whirled away from her, balling his fist despite the fact that blood was still leaking out of his hand. "Don't you understand yet, Haley? It's never been about Chris. It's always been about you." She could hear the sneer in his voice though he'd turned from her. They stood like that for a long time, her frozen in place and him shaking in rage. He could hear her breath catch as her tears began to fall in earnest, but he couldn't make himself go to her. He loved her, but no magic wand could just mend this rift between them.

"Can…can we fix this?" she asked in a tiny voice, and he glanced over her shoulder at her, his face icy and impassive.

"I don't know," he said, watching her flinch at his brutal honesty. She turned her face away, let a sheet of her hair fall forward to obscure her expression, and nodded. Her tears dripped from her chin as she made herself drop her hands to her sides. Slowly, with great effort, she walked toward the door.

"If…if you want to talk…when you're ready to talk, I'll be with Lucas."

He said nothing, and she stepped out of their apartment, not even managing a backwards glance. As the door closed behind her, Nathan felt his knees go weak. He grabbed at the counter and managed to keep himself from falling, but there was nothing to catch the shards of his heart.

Can we fix this?

He closed his eyes in agony.

What if we can't?

•••

BRookelUCAS716 • I always really appreciate your comments! You're so sweet! I'm glad you enjoyed the tension between Luke and Brooke. I certainly wouldn't want to go too easy on them. After all, that wouldn't make much of a story, would it? I debated about adding the kiss for days! I'm still not sure I did the right thing by having them kiss, but I hope that it works well with the story. I plan on focusing a lot more on Haley in the next chapter. Thank you again! I hope you continue to like my story!

Christine • I'm really glad you enjoyed chapter 3, and I hope this update was just as good! Thank you!

RoseRows • I think that since you guys are taking the time to review, I should take the time to thank you! I really do love getting the feedback! I'm glad you enjoy my writing. It's been undergoing some major changes recently, but I like to think I'm maturing as a writer. For some reason, writing Lucas is easy for me. He reminds me a lot of this guy I know in real life, which makes writing him a lot more fun. Plus, I think it adds depth to the story. But maybe I'm just being too nice to myself. XD Writing Naley is tough for me because I love them together, and having them apart is hard. On the other hand, I very much agree with your statement; it just wouldn't be realistic if they fell into each other's arms and all was forgiven. So watch for some major drama there! And thanks again!

heatherdawn • What a relief to hear that I'm not butchering the characters! I took a major turn from the way the show has gone in the past episode or two, but I like to think that Haley would come back to Nathan sooner or later. As for why she left early…I was going to get into that in this chapter but I decided to focus on Nathan again…however, expect a lot of Haley in chapter 5! There's a lot I need to address with her, so you'll find out why she left early soon. Thanks for the review! I really enjoyed reading it.

Queen2821Bee • I'm very glad you're enjoying it! I can't promise I'm going to make it easy for Brooke, but I hope you like where this goes!

Mel • I'm so glad! I hope you liked this chapter just as much! Thank you!

l-a-c-18 • Writing the dinner scene was something I'd been looking forward to, which is why it was so much of chapter 3. I toyed with the idea of them kissing for a long, long time. I know how Brooke feels about cheaters, but in the end I thought it would be a plot booster to have them kiss. She's going to have a hard time with it, like you've seen here in chapter 4. I have a really hard time with Felix because, to be quite honest, I his character. But I'm trying to be fair to him because I don't think he's an evil guy…I just don't happen to like him. XD Anyway, I hope you enjoyed chapter 4, and I promise the next update will come a lot faster than this one did!

gooseles • Hello again! D I hope it's getting more interesting! I know I took major liberties with Peyton's character in this chapter, but I promise to fix it! I'm really glad to hear that I'm improving with this story as I continue. I was nervous about writing an OTH fanfic, especially right out of the gate, but I'm getting more comfortable as I continue. Sorry it took me so long to update! Hope to see you again in chapter 5!

BrucasRocks • I'm so glad that you liked chapter 3! I hope chapter 4 was just as pleasing and descriptive, and thanks for taking the time to review!